ALR Plenary Speaker Backstage Requirements

· A trailer as a “green room”, with High Definition wide screen TV, surround sound and a DVD continuously playing the “Lord of the Rings” trilogy

· Several framed pictures of myself in various poses scattered throughout the trailer

· A six pack of Red Bull in the trailer fridge

· Green M & M’s, personalized with initials “ALR” in crystal dishes in the green room and on the podium – no less than six, no more than nine

· A security detail consisting of 7 guys taller than me

· An eight ounce glass of strained turkey gravy (kept at room temperature) I can chug before the presentation

· Flashing lights and a recording of the Marine band playing “Hail to the Chief” when introduced

· Confetti canons to blow off at the conclusion of my remarks