Fifth Fatherly Address Begins: Keeping Sound Wisdom and Discretion

INTRODUCTION

In just a number of days, we will have another Super Bowl on our televisions.

One of the great pre-game traditions is the coin flip.

Will it be heads or tails?

This is actually something people gamble on.

But here is the thing about this coin flip—there are only two ways it can go.

There will be a winner and a loser.

There will not be a tie.

The winner will call out “heads or tails” and if they are right, they’ll have the choice to take the ball or defer.

But it is heads or tails—that’s it.

There can only be one of two outcomes.

This is how the Bible the presents life.

It is heads or tails.

It is this way or that way.

It only presents two ways to live.

And this is as evident as ever in our text tonight—Proverbs 3:21-35.

CONTEXT

Before we go any further, let me just remind you where we are in Proverbs, since we haven’t been in the book together since way back before Thanksgiving.

Proverbs is made up of seven collections of Proverbs.

The first collection goes from chapter 1 to the end of chapter 9.

Within the first collection, there are ten fatherly addresses, where Solomon is speaking to his son.

We have studied four of them so far.

Tonight, we are looking at the fifth.

TEXT—These are the very words of God.

Proverbs 3:21–35 ESV

My son, do not lose sight of these— keep sound wisdom and discretion, and they will be life for your soul and adornment for your neck. Then you will walk on your way securely, and your foot will not stumble. If you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet. Do not be afraid of sudden terror or of the ruin of the wicked, when it comes, for the Lord will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being caught. Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it. Do not say to your neighbor, “Go, and come again, tomorrow I will give it”—when you have it with you. Do not plan evil against your neighbor, who dwells trustingly beside you. Do not contend with a man for no reason, when he has done you no harm. Do not envy a man of violence and do not choose any of his ways, for the devious person is an abomination to the Lord, but the upright are in his confidence. The Lord’s curse is on the house of the wicked, but he blesses the dwelling of the righteous. Toward the scorners he is scornful, but to the humble he gives favor. The wise will inherit honor, but fools get disgrace.

As we study this passage tonight, we are going to ask one question and then we will have three teaching points:

Question: What does it mean to keep sound wisdom and discretion? (v. 21)

1. There are blessings that come from keeping sound wisdom and discretion (v. 22-26).

2. There is an upright life that comes from keeping sound wisdom and discretion (v. 27-31).

3. There is a spiritual state that comes from keeping sound wisdom and discretion (v. 32-35).

SOUND WISDOM AND DISCRETION (v. 21)

We start with the question:

Question: What does it mean to keep sound wisdom and discretion? (v. 21)

SOUND WISDOM

Well, to get right to it—sound wisdom would simply be the teaching of God.

The doctrine of heaven.

The truth that God has revealed in His Word.

And to keep sound wisdom would be to fear God as He is revealed in His Word.

It would be to hold the faith with a clear conscience.

To believe the truth to the point of conviction.

To trust in what God has said with all of your heart and soul and mind.

The wisdom of God must be kept in this way if we count it to have the value that Solomon talked about earlier in chapter 3.

If we really believe that gain from her is better than silver and the profit is better than gold, then we will not let her out of our sight.

We won’t just hear the Word—we will put our faith in it and internalize it, which will lead to a certain sort of life.

DISCRETION

It will be a life of Discretion.

When Solomon says discretion, he uses a Hebrew word that would refer to sitting and making plans in private.

Throughout the first 9 chapters of Proverbs, discretion is always a positive thing.

When Solomon calls on his son to “keep discretion,” in v. 21, he is telling him to be shrewd in how he goes about applying the wisdom of God to his life.

He is calling on him to be careful about the application of truth.

To make his choices based upon what God has said in His wisdom.

NT EQUIVALENT

Maybe a New Testament equivalent to Proverbs 3:21 would be Ephesians 5:15-17

Ephesians 5:15–17 ESV

Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.

You know the light of God’s truth.

Don’t walk like you are in the darkness.

Live wisely.

God has only given you a certain about of time—use it well.

Understand God’s will and trust in it.

Don’t be a fool and go along with the evil days.

This is essentially Paul agreeing with Solomon and saying, “Keep sound wisdom and discretion.”

You know what is right and wrong.

Hold the truth close to your heart and be discerning as you plan how you will live.

TRANSITION TO REST OF TEXT

And then the rest of this passage is really just Solomon saying to his son— “Look, if you do this, these are the effects...”

You will have God’s blessings.

You will have an upright life.

You will have an intimacy with God.

Let’s start with the first fruit of keeping sound wisdom and discretion...

GOD’S BLESSINGS (v. 22-26; 33-35)

1. There are blessings that come from keeping sound wisdom and discretion (v. 22-26).

I think we can spot four blessings that the Lord says will be brought forth by keeping His truth and carefully applying it to our lives.

The Beauty of Bountiful Living (v. 22)

First of all, we have the beauty of bountiful living (v. 22).

Solomon says that wisdom and discretion will be “life for the soul” and “adornment” for the neck.

He is speaking about beautiful, lovely spiritual life.

A life that is full because of the joy of knowing God and trusting in Him and reaping the rewards of faith.

This is the life that Jesus died to give us.

John 10:10–11 ESV

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.

Satan comes to take from you.

He wants to pluck good thing after good thing from your life until there is nothing left.

Until he has destroyed you.

But Christ is the opposite.

He wants to bless you.

But there was a problem—your sin!

So then, the Good Shepherd lays down His life for you and pays the fine for your sin, so that you could receive God’s grace and know God’s blessings once again.

Christ rescues us from the barren life and He gives us the bountiful life, by reconciling us to God.

When a Christian knows the truth about God’s Son and they trust in Him and they obey His Word, then they will know the life Solomon is talking about.

They will know the beauty of abundant living.

Their soul, which was dead, will be alive.

Their neck, which used to wear pride like a necklace, is now adorned by the grace of God in Jesus Christ.

The Sweetness of Secure Living (v. 23-24)

Secondly, sound wisdom and discretion will deliver the sweetness of secure living (v. 23-24).

When they are awake and walking on their way throughout their day, they will be secure.

Their foot will not stumble.

When they are sleeping, in their most vulnerable state, they will not be afraid.

Their sleep will be sweet.

So then—both day and night, those who keep sound wisdom and discretion are secure.

No matter what is happening, where it is happening or why it is happening, we are secure.

For even when our number is up and our time is spent, we know that we will be with the Lord.

To live is Christ, but for those who live for Christ, to die is gain.

These verses remind us of a couple of wonderful promises in the Psalms.

Psalm 121:3–4 ESV

He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.

Very similar to Proverbs 3:23-24, except there is one difference.

After saying that your foot will not stumble, the focus is not on our sleeping, but on God’s lack of sleeping.

In other words, we can sleep because God does not.

Day and night, we are secure.

It also reminds us of one of my favorite verses in all of Scripture.

Psalm 127:2 ESV

It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep.

There is no need to get up early and go to bed late worrying our heads off.

It does no good.

God wants us to live for Him and then go to sleep knowing that He is awake and watching over us.

And only He can provide the sort of peace that this security delivers to us.

The Fortification of Fearless Living (v. 25-26)

Thirdly, keeping sound wisdom and discretion produces the fortification of fearless living (v. 25-26).

Judgment Day is coming.

The Day of the Lord is drawing near.

And that is the sudden terror that is spoken of in v. 25.

It is what was warned about in chapter 1:

Proverbs 1:25–26 ESV

because you have ignored all my counsel and would have none of my reproof, I also will laugh at your calamity; I will mock when terror strikes you,

But when the ruin of the wicked comes, God’s people have no reason to be afraid.

Not because of anything good in us, but because THE LORD is our confidence (v. 26).

Our foot would be firmly lodged between guilt and condemnation, if not for the grace of God.

We would not be able to get free.

The sudden terror of God’s judgment would have rightfully collapsed on our heads and then the billows would have rolled back and forth for a Christ-less eternity.

But by the death and resurrection of Jesus, our foot has been permanently delivered from the grip of death and the threat of judgment.

And so, we are free to live fearlessly.

We are free to live without fear of God’s wrath.

And this grace-wrought freedom fortifies us from the inside out.

The Spirit who dwells in us and tells us that God is our Father, fortifies us from the inside out.

Ephesians 3:16 ESV

that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being,

Having the confidence of the Lord in our inner-being changes how we live and move and respond in our outer-being.

Having the confidence of the Lord in the soul will transform how we live in the body.

Knowing that we have no eternal Hell to fear should change how we live today.

APPLICATION

Sometimes I will go to check on my daughter and I will find her sitting in her room and her room is all around her.

I mean, it is ON THE FLOOR, ALL AROUND HER!

The mess is so big that I found myself wondering, “How did we even get here?”

Like—how did that Barbie get on top of the ceiling fan? Why is there REAL WATER in the Barbie Dreamhouse pool?

For some of you, your life feels like that tonight.

You are thinking, “How did we even get here? How did things get so messed up?”

Well, are you keeping sound wisdom and discretion?

Are you seeking God in His Word each day in order to understand His will?

Are you praying and asking God for the wisdom to walk wisely?

Are you making good use of the time in these evil days?

We cannot ignore God’s instructions for a beautiful, bountiful life and then be dumbfounded when things are ugly and empty.

We cannot spurn God’s offers of security and then be bewildered when we are drowning in worry.

We cannot break our communion with Christ because of laziness or acting on sinful desires and then be shocked when we are feeling guilty and fearful.

Abundant life, 24/7 spiritual security and fearless, fortified living are blessings that enter into our lives through the gate of God’s wisdom and discretion.

We cannot forget it.

THE UPRIGHT LIFE (v. 27-31)

2. There is an upright life that comes from keeping sound wisdom and discretion (v. 27-31).

Uprightness is a major goal that Proverbs has for its reader.

It is the sort of living that God’s wisdom should produce in us.

To be upright is to live with no partiality.

You are fair to everyone.

You shoot straight.

You are on the level.

We have already seen in our study, the sort of promises that God makes to the upright:

Proverbs 2:7 ESV

he stores up sound wisdom for the upright; he is a shield to those who walk in integrity,

So God stores up sound wisdom for the upright and when the upright keep that sound wisdom, they can expect more integrity to flow from their lives.

And they can expect the Lord to protect them as they walk in uprightness.

Now, as we look at v. 27-31, Solomon doesn’t leave his son guessing about what this uprightness looks like. Instead, he gives him these extremely practical instructions about things that he will not do, if he is keeping sound wisdom and discretion.

He gives five DO NOT commands.

1. Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it (v. 27).

If you can do good, then do good.

Don’t have an uncaring attitude.

That is part is pretty straightforward. The part of this verse that confuses people is the part that says, “to whom it is due.”

Sometimes people will read this and say, “This means that God wants us to help those who help themselves or help us in some way.”

But this is where we have to go back to Jesus teaching about neighbors.

Luke 10:25–37 ESV

And behold, a lawyer stood up to put him to the test, saying, “Teacher, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?” He said to him, “What is written in the Law? How do you read it?” And he answered, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself.” And he said to him, “You have answered correctly; do this, and you will live.” But he, desiring to justify himself, said to Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?” Jesus replied, “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and he fell among robbers, who stripped him and beat him and departed, leaving him half dead. Now by chance a priest was going down that road, and when he saw him he passed by on the other side. So likewise a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as he journeyed, came to where he was, and when he saw him, he had compassion. He went to him and bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he set him on his own animal and brought him to an inn and took care of him. And the next day he took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper, saying, ‘Take care of him, and whatever more you spend, I will repay you when I come back.’ Which of these three, do you think, proved to be a neighbor to the man who fell among the robbers?” He said, “The one who showed him mercy.” And Jesus said to him, “You go, and do likewise.”

So according to Jesus, what does it mean to be a neighbor?

To show mercy.

And to whom is the mercy due?

To the one who is in need.

So then, going back to Proverbs 3:27—what is Solomon commanding his son?

He is saying, —Son, do not withhold good from anyone in need if you can do good to them.

He is teaching him the essence of neighborly love.

The qualification on the part of the one receiving good is simply that they need mercy—not that they have helped themselves.

In fact, this whole section in v. 27-31 is really about neighborly love, which is why the word neighbor is use twice.

We see one of those times in v. 28...

2. Do not say to your neighbor, “Go, and come again, tomorrow I will give it”—when you have it with you (v. 28).

This is very closely related to the command in v. 27.

Those who keep sound wisdom and discretion will not procrastinate doing good.

If they have what someone needs, they won’t delay. They will give it.

Because what is the purpose of the delay?

Well—you hope they find someone else who can give it and if they can’t then you will reluctantly give up the assistance.

The problem with this is that the Lord wants us to be cheerful givers, who do not just do the right thing, but have the right attitude.

Instead of delaying the good, Solomon commands his son to just give it up.

In truth, he is imploring his son not to be selfish.

He is telling him that those who live wisely live with an open hand.

They are not stingy.

3. Do not plan evil against your neighbor, who dwells trustingly beside you (v. 29).

This picture drawn by this command is one where someone is sitting in their house just plotting ways to exploit the people around them.

In the first century, this may look like stealing your neighbor’s crops or cattle.

Today, this might look like needlessly reporting your neighbor to the HOA or figuring out their WiFi password and stealing their internet.

As believers, we should never use people’s trust as an opportunity to take advantage or them and destroy their peace and happiness.

We should be plotting ways to love them as ourselves, not harm them for the sake of selfish gain.

4. Do not contend with a man for no reason, when he has done you no harm (v. 30).

Those who keep sound wisdom and discretion, do not keep getting in needless arguments.

Proverbs has so much to say about the way we use our words and we will cover that ground on a few occasions—Lord-willing.

But just consider this from Proverbs 15:18

Proverbs 15:18 ESV

A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.

People who are contentious for no reason are people who simply have no control over themselves.

They are so easily triggered in their temperament, that it could be about faith, foreign policy or football---it doesn’t matter.

They are ready to brawl.

There are times as believers in which we have to contend.

We are called to contend for the faith.

Jude 3 ESV

Beloved, although I was very eager to write to you about our common salvation, I found it necessary to write appealing to you to contend for the faith that was once for all delivered to the saints.

But this is something we do with Christlikeness. With gentleness and respect.

That is not the sort of contention Solomon is speaking about in Proverbs 3.

He is talking about being quarrelsome.

He is talking about being argumentative.

He is talking about being a big jerk.

He is talking about getting in fights when really there are no fights to get in.

5. Do not envy a man of violence and do not choose any of his ways (v. 31)

And then finally, we have a commandment regarding the heart.

Those who keep sound wisdom and discretion, don’t sit around envying those who prosper through violence and transgression.

We see Asaph in danger of this in Psalm 73.

He looks at the plight of the righteous and the prosperity of the wicked and his faith falters.

Psalm 73:2–3 ESV

But as for me, my feet had almost stumbled, my steps had nearly slipped. For I was envious of the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.

But then he worships and remembers who the Lord is…He is a God who will judge the wicked in the end.

Psalm 73:17 ESV

until I went into the sanctuary of God; then I discerned their end.

We should not envy those who are on a path to destruction.

We certainly should not pattern our lives after them.

APPLICATION

When Katie and I were engaged, I drove a little Honda Civic that I loved. I got a great deal on it because it had been restored after being wrecked.

But then I got hit from behind and it totaled the car and the insurance company gave me very little money because it was a wrecked car that had been restored.

So I bought a Mazda Millenia—a car that caused me many issues for the entire five years I had it.

It always seemed to have some sort of dashboard light on.

Engine. Tire pressure. This sensor. That sensor.

And those lights were there to warn me, as the driver, that something was wrong on the car.

In the old Millenia, that wasn’t always the case. Sometimes, they just lit up for the sake of it.

But by and large, this is the case with cars.

Well, looking at Solomon’s five neighborly commandments as a sort of ruler for our life, what do they say?

Are you keeping sound wisdom and discretion?

What would your neighbors say?

If the Law of the Lord finds you guilty tonight and you have been:

Withholding good

Delaying good

Plotting evil

Picking fights

Envying the wicked

…Your sin against these commands should serve as a bit of a “warning light” for you.

Somehow, some way, you have veered into selfish living.

You have taken your eyes off God’s valuable wisdom and you are operating with the wisdom of the world.

Somehow, some way, you have spiritually declined.

And the people around you could testify to it by the way you have been treating them.

If I am struggling spiritually, my closest neighbors—my wife and my kids—will be the first to know.

How would your family say you are doing in keeping sound wisdom and discretion?

Listen—in the same way that you should not delay good to your neighbor, you should not delay good to God.

Do the good thing and repent.

Turn away from your selfishness. Turn away from your withholding and delaying and plotting and picking.

Come to the Lord for the repairs you need.

Bring your heart to Him, confess your sin and start again on the path of uprightness in the power of the Spirit.

SPIRITUAL STATE (v. 32-35)

Now, let’s go on to our third point.

We have seen the blessings that come with keeping sound wisdom and discretion...

We have see the upright life that comes from keeping sound wisdom and discretion...

3. There is a spiritual state that comes from keeping sound wisdom and discretion (v. 32-35).

We started tonight by saying there are only two ways to live.

There is only heads and tails.

It is life or it is death.

You keep sound wisdom and discretion, or you do not.

You have regard for the doctrine of God and His Word and you make your plans accordingly, or you live life as if God has not even spoken.

As if He doesn’t even exist.

Well, this is abundantly clear in the last few verses of the address.

We see two types of people being described by multiple terms.

On one side, you have devious (v. 32), wicked (v. 33), scornful (v. 34), fools (v. 35).

On the other side, you have the upright (v. 32), righteous (v. 33), humble (v. 34), wise people (v. 35).

The terms in each verse are the opposite of each other.

Devious is the opposite of upright.

Wicked is the opposite of righteous.

Scornful or mocking is the opposite of humble.

The fool is the opposite of the wise.

And the two different groups have two very different experiences when it comes to God.

The devious, wicked, scornful fools are called an abomination to the Lord (v. 32), the Lord’s curse is upon their house (v. 33), God is scornful toward them (v. 34) and they get disgrace (v. 35).

The upright, righteous, humble, wise ones, are in God’s confidence (v. 32).

That means that they have intimacy with Him. They keep confidence with the Lord the way best friends or close business partners might keep confidence with each other.

They also have God’s blessing upon their home (v. 33), His favor upon their life (v. 34) and honor as their inheritance (v. 35).

And by the way, when it comes to v. 35, we know what that “honor” is as New Testament believers...

It is the honor of being a co-heir with Christ.

Romans 8:17 ESV

and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.

APPLICATION

My wife and I have a major driving disagreement.

If we are coming to Seaford from the Fort Eustis Food Lion, I am certain that it is fast to turn right, get spit out near the dump on Goodwin Neck and then you go home from there.

She is convinced it is faster to turn left and to go allllll the way back down Wolf Trap in order to get spit out on Goodwin Neck closer to Seaford.

Now—we both have our heels dug in. We both hold our positions. And yet—we have never timed it.

Why? Because ultimately we both know it is probably a difference of 30 seconds at the most. And we know that both routes lead to the same place—HOME.

But what IS true of my path home from the grocery store is NOT true of the two paths that we see in this passage today.

One path—the one where sound wisdom and discretion is kept, will find a person experiencing intimacy with God, blessing, favor and honor.

On the other path—the one where sound wisdom and discretion are lost, will find a person as an abomination, cursed, scorned by God and disgraced.

The difference could not be more clear.

The question for Solomon’s boy was, “Which path would he take?”

What would be HIS spiritual state before God?

And the question for you tonight is the same.

What’s your path?

FAILED VENTURES

In verse 35, when Solomon says disgrace, it is the word that would have been used to describe someone’s failed venture.

And it is a reminder to us as we close of what life is for.

This life is for God.

And a life that is successful is a life lived before Him that brings Him pleasure.

We do not want our lives to look like failed ventures.

We don’t want our lives to look like an old shopping mall that didn’t work out due to all sorts of choices to disregard sound wisdom and discretion.

This is certainly who we were before Christ, but brothers and sisters—you have not been redeemed for a failed venture.

The Lord has redeemed you for Himself.

His Son Jesus Christ has lived and died and resurrected and you have trusted in the Good News of His Gospel.

Maybe you have forgotten this and you have wandered, as we are prone to do.

Well, tonight you have been reminded about the truth regarding what God wants for your life.

Repent.

Ask God to help you once more understand His will in His Word.

Understand the evil days.

Walk wisely.

Make the best use of the time.

Keep sound wisdom and discretion...

...And Enjoy the blessings, the life and the spiritual state that flow from them.