Rich Young Ruler

Intro

“Kyle you have to do your best!”

That was a phrase my dad would oft say when growing up, whether it be in sports, school, even Church things like Bible Quiz team!

What did I hate about an innocent phrase?

I hated that it was an unquantifiable mess of a proposition!

I was pretty good at school, and it came easy, so then, can it be doing my best if I am getting an A with 20% effort?

In baseball, I was pretty good, but always thought I was bad! So I did all that I could, but struck out twice with the bases loaded, and lined out into a double-play. Is that doing my best, if there was a higher ability level than I presented at the time?

I also probably hated it because I felt convicted by it at times

I love music, and grew up playing piano, and once I got into it for a few years, I would only practice for recitals, and maybe memorize my music. I didn’t really love playing piano

Then i moved to Trumpet. If I liked the music I would practice, and that was usually a lot of pep band songs like ‘Land of 10k Dances’ which is that “Na-na na na na” songs, or like learning Mortal Combat Theme, or other fun songs to do at Football and Basketball Games

So I felt guilty perhaps for knowing I left something on the table, knowing I could of been a higher chair in band if I practiced, or gotten to more advanced piano if I had really tried with it

The hardest thing about ‘doing your best’ is that was, and I would say is, no way to actually measure if you did your best, or are doing your best

If I don’t know my limits, how can I do my best?

If I fail, how can that be doing my best if the end result is a giant failure of what I set out to do?

It has always felt like you are asking a second grader to explain imaginary numbers lol

It just wrecks your brain since there is no category for it

It’s not 1-100%, it is infinitely varying at any point, but sometimes your best requires 110%, and then you say how can I do more than I’m capable of?

In time, I think I came to simply categorize ‘doing my best’ as a synonym for perfection, and began to chase perfection

A sermon is never perfect, there’s always more I could change on this message, better words I could of said to that person look for pastoral care, better ways I could read the Bible, better ways I could love my wife, etc, etc

The startling thing is that I’m not alone, perfectionism in its varying seeds is an epidemic in our world, and certainly in our country

From 1989-2016 self-oriented perfectionism scores increased by 10%, while socially prescribed perfectionism scores rose by 33%.  (American Psychological Ass.)

In a Harvard study in 2022 it found that:

Of Individuals aged 16 to 25, 85.4% identified as having perfectionist traits, primarily focused on academic achievement. This perfectionism often led to stress affecting their physical and mental health.  

What are those?

Anxiety, Depression, OCD, Eating Disorders, and Suicide

The stats are crazy!

20% or 1/5 teens will experience a depressive episode by age 17

A depressive episode is a period of time lasting at least two weeks where a person experiences significant symptoms of depression, including persistent low mood, loss of interest in activities, fatigue, changes in appetite or sleep, feelings of worthlessness, and potentially thoughts of death or suicide, impacting their daily functioning

Of those 20%, 15% have major depressive episodes, and of those 20%, 75% of them have another mental disorder plaguing them

Since Anxiety and Depression are cursed friends you don’t ever want together, but they will come and crash your place if one joins, there is also about 20% of teens struggling with anxiety

There are multitude of reasons, but the rise if perfectionism is certainly not helping those numbers decrease

The workplace is not any better

A Forbes article says, “Reports indicate that 66% of workplaces struggle with perfectionism, and one-third of employees consider leaving their jobs due to perfectionist expectations.”

Those expectations can come from within, or from the company striving to make their shareholders that one more dollar!

The thing is, living up to expectations is certainly something that has plagued us since our beginnings, we are seeking an identity, and what we do is a very easy way to do that

That longing that we feel, that our society feels, that desire for perfection, we see it clear as day in the Bible as well, here in the Rich, Young, Ruler

Picture him: an exemplary young man in early manhood, fine and clean morally.

The son of wealthy parents but not spoiled by wealth, with a strong religious bent, an esteemed member of the church, in fact, one of its pillars,

A ruler of the local synagogue who was more important than a member of the church council in our present congregations is.

Where are the parents that would not be proud of such a son? Where the church that would not give him a prominent place? Where the young woman that would not be attracted by his position and his personal excellence?

Yet all this is worthless in the eyes of Jesus. In fact, the man himself is not satisfied. If Jesus thought that he had trouble in regard to the old commandments, this, he assures Jesus, is not the case.

Somehow he has come to feel that he lacks something. What can it be? He puts the question to Jesus; he thinks that Jesus must now be able to tell him in what he still falls behind.

What is that deep question he has, what is that yearning?

This young man is on the cusp of something great, a choice and chance of a lifetime

He knows in his center that this goodness he seeks cannot be achieved by deeds of doctrine, and so he finds Jesus, the Rabbi who says things in ways that transcend the traditions of the day, and does miracles that then authenticate his teaching with his supernatural power

What this young man was so close to grasping, yet walked away from, was Jesus

So what happens when being good isn’t good enough? When we can’t do enough things to quell the questions, when we can’t sit alone for a moment with our thoughts of things we might be doing?

This story reminds us that ultimately,

Surrendering to Jesus is the path to goodness

We Are Not Perfect

The first way that we see this is that we are not perfect!

I know this might surprise some of you, but I am not perfect, you are not perfect, and not even Tabitha is perfect!

This story appear in Matthew, Mark and Luke, and when we combine the information, we learn that this man was a rich young ruler, a

Ruler of a synagogue more than likely

This guy seems to know that despite all he’s done, (as we see him upholding the commandments that Jesus asks him about later), he feels that there is still missing

We don’t know if it’s unsure of if he’s done enough, or he feels like he has to do more or what?

It’s no wonder if you feel you are walking on eggshells all the day long trying to appease this God you serve

If you mess up, you have to find some animal to kill, or are unclean for a number of days, but this guy seems to not be getting sucked into the traditions and legalism that plagued the people

He seems to be coming with a desire to learn and grow and find the answers that Jesus might give him

Yet, his heart is still based in what he must do, rather than who he must follow

He seems to want good things, but ultimately, he still gets to decide to do or not to do

He really ends up deciding he doesn’t want to do what is required of eternal life, he wants to do what he wants to do

His allegiance is to his money, not to God or Jesus

He has outward obedience, but a heart that is glad that is all it takes to please God and others

And we see here comes the issue, starting with flattery to try and butter up Jesus

He asks Jesus ‘What good do I need to do to get eternal life?”

This is about entering the Messiah’s kingdom, it is a bit of a differing view of ‘eternal life’ than we have revealed by the NT

Jesus then says, I don’t decide what is good here, God does, he is the standard

So Jesus points back to what God already revealed in the law, and says keep the commandments!

The young man then asks for clarification, are there any of the 600 plus laws that are of higher importance?

Jesus reads off the back half of the 10 commandments and then adds love your neighbor

Jesus names off all the commandments you can see with your eyes if you are doing

These commandments deal with people and their relationships with each other, so how do you live out the truth of the message of God?

This man responds that he has done all of these!

Now we might be wondering why Matthew doesn’t refer to the Beatitudes here,

that was where Jesus reminds us that it’s not enough to not have an affair, but that if we even look lustfully, we’ve already gone there

But Jesus doesn’t, he instead says, go and sell your things

But the man struggles and walks away gravely saddened

So what do we take from this, is that we are not perfect

Why that is important is a for few reasons, it means we can never bridge the bridge between us and God on our own ability

It also reminds us that our struggle with all of this faith, hope, and love stuff we are talking about stems from our failure in the garden

Satan almost always tries his old trick, “Did God really say?”

Since we are not perfect, it also takes a burden off our shoulders, we don’t have to walk on eggshells!

Perfectionism makes us hyper-focused on avoiding errors, leading to anxiety and self-doubt.

Letting go of this mindset, we can act with confidence, knowing that mistakes are part of growth.

The most crazy part of the this story is how close this man gets to Jesus, and yet how far he stays

He looked like he was ready to join the group of the disciples, but he walked away

He didn’t want to deal with the heart he had, and so he left Jesus for his own desires

He continued to strive for eternal life in his empty, graceless ways

He could of surrendered it all to Jesus, and rested, but instead he will continue to strive!

Perfectionism is exhausting. By rejecting it, we embrace the rest Jesus promises in Matthew 11:28-30: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

We are not perfect, so we need to stop pretending like we are, our greatest need is always to keep ourselves centered on Christ

If this Rich Young Ruler would have surrender to Jesus, it would have changed his life, and he would not of been turned away to legalism of trying to earn his way into heaven

This young man was not ready for Jesus to dictate good and bad, he couldn’t deal with that call, and so he said, no I will be the judge of my ethical code!

Even if he had perfectly kept that law, at this point he broke it, he rejected Jesus and walked away so he could be the dictator of good and bad

He turned away grace, and the person of Jesus because the cost was too high, he didn’t want to part with his many things, and it cost him everything of worth

He wanted wealth in both worlds, but Jesus demanded him to chose between the two

As much as he claimed to desire eternal life, to live for the Messiah and God, he could not give up his great amount of possessions for eternal treasure

He would not surrender to Jesus, and Jesus is the path to goodness!

We Can’t Earn Goodness by Gathering

Yet, the second thing we see is that we cannot earn goodness by gathering things

You see back in the day, the people of Jesus’ day believed that material things meant God had blessed you with his favor

This makes sense when you read the OT promises, they are promises like land, good harvest, healthy kids, etc

So in Jesus’ day, a religious leader was expected to be at least moderately wealthy

But Jesus is coming to do something new, and material wealth is a stumbling block for us

It’s interesting since Jesus quoted that he has no place to lay his head, he relies upon women to support the ministry, even gentile women, which would have been quite scandalous and a red flag for many in that time

This would of made Jesus less likely to be listened to than perhaps anything else he did!

There were certainly examples of Holy Men that were impoverished, but they were the exception rather than the rule, like John the Baptist

The occasional exception does not invalidate the rule, and the rule was that material blessing = a sign of God’s blessing

This is why the disciples are so shocked at these words!

This young ruler was one of the favored ones since he had stuff and standing

They are saying this

Jesus if the people whom God favors can’t get into heaven, then what can we do!

How can we get through a needle eye if we are as big as a camel?

To put it in modern verbiage, it would be like Jesus saying, something crazy like it is easier for Kyle to speak and write fluent Mandarin than for a deacon to get to heaven!

The Riches were a problem

Not so nice as not just for him, but they hold sway on us

The question of faith and allegiance

Confronted with the choice, the man renews his allegiance to money (v. 22). Perhaps he is sad because somehow he cannot serve both God and money (6:24). By his decision he robs himself both of enjoying present wealth (6:19–34) and of obtaining true riches (v. 30; 13:44–46).

We are rich, this is personal for us

It is so easy to succumb to riches, we have so much, we don’t even know what it is to have needs

RC Ryle, whom those of you who have been coming to our Men’s Ministry know of well, speaking on the dangers of wealth said that many a church in England need to place this quote in their buildings

“In all times of prosperity, Lord deliver us”

Riches are a hurdle to overcome, not something to be coveted

We have to ask what drive our hearts

We can get to heaven, but we must throw ourselves at Jesus’ feet time and time again

Our theme is Faith, Hope, and Love this year

We are zooming in on faith these next few weeks, and today we see that faith revolves around allegiance to God

It means submission and deference to his desires, commands, and leading

Sin is not just doing something overtly bad, it is also ignore something that God calls us to, like for the RYR it was selling his possessions, to then not do so is sinning

When you feel prompted by the Holy Spirit to do something, and don’t that is a sin by an omitted action

Story of the impression that I need to call so-and-so, but don’t, and recent experience of doing that and being very blessed with J-rod or Bones

Thankfully, a large part of our faith is repentance, and returning back to God

It’s a good reminder that things can never bring us salvation, nor can our striving to do ‘good things’, sitting on a pile of cash doesn’t bring you any closer to God

When we rely on things we’ve gathered, whether by works or wealth, we stand on shaky ground

The wealth can disappear at anytime, just look at any depression in our own countries history, or a sudden war in a landlocked European country, you quickly lose everything

Our works are good by what standard, and who are we doing them for?

We might do them for our own perceived character by others, which makes those very actions tainted

We could also do them expecting things in return

I did the garbage, so you need to do the dishes!

Yet, there is no guarantee that we will even get what we need

Ecclesiastes 9:11 “11 Again I saw under the sun that the race is not to the swift, or the battle to the strong, or bread to the wise, or riches to the discerning, or favor to the skillful; rather, time and chance happen to all of them.”

Ultimately, we need to surrender to God!

DL Moody said this,

“Let God have your life; He can do more with it than you can.”

There are many reasons for us not to surrender to God, but we need to trust him,

We trust him, and we will find, “God’s plans will always be greater and more beautiful than all your disappointments.” – Roy T. Bennett

We have to surrender to Jesus, so we can find true goodness in his person!

We Can’t Earn Goodness by Scattering

Yet, poverty is not meritorious on it’s own either, it doesn’t make us more holy if we are not Musk, Bezos, or Gates because we have less money!

The problem is also still present in us, that we are sinful and selfish people!

Peter says we’ve left everything!

Yet still Judas in there, who missed Jesus, but was poor

It is not material based, it is person based, it is seeking Jesus

Goodness by God’s standard is not something we can get by money and deeds, but only by devotion to Christ

Peter asks Jesus what do we get!

Peter is not rebuked, but Jesus shows him the long term blessing of following him!

We get eternal life, and a 100x reward, its a great investment!

The apostles will have a reward of judging and ruling people with Jesus!

Person of Jesus is what we base our faith on

Righteousness/Goodness stems from God, not us

So the acting for rewards is not innately bad, but the end reminds us that poverty needs Jesus just as much as the rich

The first will be last, and the last first

If we don’t place Jesus first, we will place ourselves at the end of that line

Application

“Surrendering to God is not the loss of control, but the gain of His perfect guidance.”  (vs the RYR)

If Jesus is not Lord of All, then he is not Lord at All

“Our greatest fear should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don’t really matter.” (Chan)

As you navigate the complex social dynamics of school—peer pressure, academic stress, and self-image issues—it’s easy to feel lost. Consider dedicating a few moments each day to pray about these pressures and seek Jesus’ strength and wisdom. You could also start a ‘surrender challenge’ with friends, where you share one burden or worry with each other and pray for one another. This can create a supportive community that encourages everyone to lean on Jesus instead of succumbing to fear or anxiety.

In the high-stakes environment of work, it can be tempting to strive for success by your own efforts, leading to burnout and dissatisfaction. Instead, take specific time each week for prayer and reflection, focusing on surrendering your career goals to Jesus. Write down your biggest work challenge and commit it to prayer, seeking His guidance and wisdom. This practice can help you develop a mindset where you realize that your worth is not in your accomplishments, but in being a vessel for His goodness in the workplace.

In your personal life at home, reflect on how your daily habits and priorities might betray your allegiance to Jesus. Create a spiritual check-in with yourself at the end of each day. Spend a few moments journaling about where you felt aligned with Christ and where you strayed. This practice can reveal patterns of distraction or struggle, allowing you to make conscious choices each day that reaffirm your devotion to the Lord.