Dealing with Bitterness

Romans 12:17–21 NLT

Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone. Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the Lord. Instead, “If your enemies are hungry, feed them. If they are thirsty, give them something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals of shame on their heads.” Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good.

Ephesians 4:32 NLT

Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.

Introduction:

Tree rings - General Sherman - Denison’s trip to California

Each event in life causes a ring

We’re the same way

Today, lets explore how those rings or events in our lives can cause us to be bitter and what can we do about it.

Bitterness Can Control Your Life

Bitterness can wreak havoc on you, physically, emotionally, and spiritually

messes with your nervous system

messes with your digestion - can’t eat right, guts messed up

messes with your attitude and disposition - Mr or Mrs. Grumps A-lot

Changes your personality

Increases blood pressure, causes heart problems

robs you of peace

messes up your sleep

messes with your testimony

happy words from a sad face don’t sell it

Bitterness becomes your rudder

As a rudder steers a boat in a particular direction, so bitterness does for you

It is what controls where you are going

It guides the decisions in your life, whether consciously or unconsciously

Bitterness takes you on a journey but not one that leads to an abundant life

Not only does bitterness control your life, but…

Bitterness is Corrosive

If you put a coin is hydrochloric acid, it will be gone within a few hours

Its the same way with bitterness, it will eat you from the inside out

We can even use God’s Word to try and justify our feelings:

Matthew 5:38 ““You have heard the law that says the punishment must match the injury: ‘An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.’”

If she tells stories, I can tell stories too!

If I go down, you go down too

I’ll show you! I’ll tear you down before you tear me down and so on….

Bitterness can begin to define us — you and I have both seen it before

The Cure for Bitterness

There is only one cure for bitterness

You cannot find it in a self help book or at the drugstore

You can’t find it at the bar or your girlfriend’s bedroom

You can’t find it in a new marriage

You can’t find it in a new job

The only cure to bitterness is forgiveness

Matthew 18:21–22 NLT

Then Peter came to him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?” “No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven!

Now if you do the math, that is 490 times. Even if you could forgive someone 490 times and you were actually keeping track, what is really being said here is that you are to forgive as many times as it takes.

What is Forgiveness

It can be defined as “the act of setting someone free from an obligation to you that is a result of a wrong done against you.”

According to Dr Tim Hill there are three parts to forgiveness and I think he’s right!

a. Injury - someone has caused injury to you (there’s nothing you can do about this)

b. Debt - now that someone has caused you wrong, someone has to pay (there is nothing you can do about this) (You can’t make someone pay you back)

c. Cancellation of debt - (You have to be the one to cancel the debt, be spiritual enough and do it!)

Joseph is a great example - Gen. 37:23-28

He was sold into slavery by his brothers

When he was in charge and could take revenge on them he didn’t

Instead he revealed who he really was and wept with them

Job is a good example

His friends were loud and made all kinds of accusations

But Job didn’t retaliate - look what happened

Job 42:1–10 NLT

Then Job replied to the Lord: “I know that you can do anything, and no one can stop you. You asked, ‘Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorance?’ It is I—and I was talking about things I knew nothing about, things far too wonderful for me. You said, ‘Listen and I will speak! I have some questions for you, and you must answer them.’ I had only heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes. I take back everything I said, and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance.” After the Lord had finished speaking to Job, he said to Eliphaz the Temanite: “I am angry with you and your two friends, for you have not spoken accurately about me, as my servant Job has. So take seven bulls and seven rams and go to my servant Job and offer a burnt offering for yourselves. My servant Job will pray for you, and I will accept his prayer on your behalf. I will not treat you as you deserve, for you have not spoken accurately about me, as my servant Job has.” So Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite did as the Lord commanded them, and the Lord accepted Job’s prayer. When Job prayed for his friends, the Lord restored his fortunes. In fact, the Lord gave him twice as much as before!

There is no better example than Jesus

Luke 23:33–34 NLT

When they came to a place called The Skull, they nailed him to the cross. And the criminals were also crucified—one on his right and one on his left. Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” And the soldiers gambled for his clothes by throwing dice.

Symptoms

There are some ways to examine yourself to see if you have any bitterness.

You can’t be around certain people or even talk about them without getting riled up

There are certain people that you avoid because you don’t like their kind (personality not color)

You are quick to speak and get upset easily

You are plagued by guilt over the past sins

You hate those who are close or those who want to be close

You hold people hostage

What Do I Do?

The first thing to do is receive forgiveness from God for your sins by accepting Jesus as Savior

Face the problem don’t avoid it

You have a responsiblity to do something

Do you want healing?

Bitterness and unforgiveness are like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. But you are the one who is sick and dying

Forgive everyone who has anything to do with the situation

Forgive youself

Ask HS to help and reveal - He is the one who can put it all together

Illustration:

Corrie ten Boom and her family were Christians who helped Jewish people escape the genocide taking place during WWII. They lived in the Netherlands and made a room in the house where they could hide people from the Nazi regime. Eventually Corrie, her sister and their father were sent to concentration camps without as much as an explanation. Their father died only a short while after arriving and eventually Betsy, Corrie’s saint of a sister died. She watched as they took her sick body out of the sickbay and lay her naked body on the ground. Years later after miraculosly being released she was preaching at a church in Germany where a man listened intently and came forward after service and stuck his hand out to shake Sister Corrie’s hand. She did not want to for this was one of the guards at her prison camp. He had become a Christian and was a new man. The Holy Spirit enabled her to extend her hand and offer a smile and when that happened she recounts that she felt such a release of the past and peace came flooding in.

I too, along with many others have experienced this strange thing that happens when you decide to let God fix the wrongs in your life and forgive.

What will you do?

Today you have the opportunity to experience that.

Altar Call