The Vow of Priority in a Godly Marriage

Bible Passage: Matthew 22:37, Genesis 2:24, Ephesians 5:25

Introduction: In recognition of the upcoming Valentine’s Day celebrations, I thought we would wander away from the liturgical calendar and explore some different ideas. Today, I invite you to reflect on the sacred institution of marriage and the divine principles that can guide us to a fulfilling and godly union. As we delve into the Word of God, let us open our hearts and minds to His teachings on the Vow of Priority, a fundamental vow that can transform our marriages.

Why is it important? A full 50% of marriages don’t make it. Of those that do, many certainly are filled with issues. I’m one of the fortunate ones. With a loving, caring wife. With a wonderful family. It seems that successful marriages are quite rare. But that doesn’t need to be the case.

I believe that a successful marriage is built on the foundation of placing God at the center, expressing love through commitment, and reflecting Christ's love for the Church in our relationships.

Big Idea: Prioritizing God in our marriages leads to deeper love, unity, and strength in the relationship, reflecting Christ's love for His Church.

Pursue Foundational Unity

Genesis 2:24 NIV

That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.

God’s original design for marriage calls for a leave-and-cleave commitment, symbolizing the sanctity and exclusivity of the marital bond. By understanding this foundational principle, couples learn the importance of prioritizing each other second only to God. Through this biblical lens, consider the importance of spiritual, emotional, and physical unity. This understanding encourages couples to embrace their God-given roles, uniting to reflect the covenantal nature of marriage as intended by the Creator.

A couple celebrated their 10th anniversary and decided to renew their vows. They jokingly included a clause in their vows stating that they would prioritize each other—after God, of course! But during the ceremony, the wife dryly remarked that sometimes she feels like her husband prioritizes his fantasy football team over her. The husband laughed and promised to ‘take his wife to the championship’ by always making time for her, showing that love and priority can come even in the lightest moments.

Practice Sacrificial Love

Ephesians 5:25 NIV

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

There was a couple who decided to keep a 'love jar' at home. Every time they did something kind for each other, they would write it on a slip of paper and put it in the jar. One day, the wife took all the notes out and saw a mountain of love. They laughed at how easy it was to love selflessly, and each note reminded them of the joy in giving. Even the simplest acts, like making coffee or leaving a sweet note, filled their marriage with joy and connection!

Guys, we are called to love our wives as Christ loved the Church, suggesting that Christ’s selfless, sacrificial love should be mirrored in marital relationships. We need to prioritize self-giving love as it fortifies our marriages. I encourage us all to embody this spirit of service and sacrifice, reinforcing the commitment to put God and spouse above our own interests. Such love fosters a deeper, Christ-reflecting intimacy and strength in marriage.

The Vow of Priority Matthew 22:37

Matthew 22:37 NIV

Jesus replied: “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’

In today's world, it's easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of life, often neglecting the most important relationships. The first vow we must make is the Vow of Priority. As Jesus taught us, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart" (Matthew 22:37). God must be our first priority, and our spouse must be our second. When we place God at the center of our lives, everything else falls into place. We must promise that God will be our first priority and our spouse will be our second.

Obeying Jesus’ command to love God with all our heart, soul, and mind is essential to a thriving marriage. Prioritizing this love creates a foundation based on divine principles, allowing couples to navigate struggles with faith. It is important for us to prioritize daily intentional love towards God, which transforms how we love our spouse. This Christ-centered love cultivates unity and resilience within the marriage, echoing the call to reflect Christ's love.

Understanding the Vow of Priority: The concept of priority is crucial in maintaining a healthy and godly marriage. Many of us have heard the saying, "I found the ONE!" But in reality, we must understand that God is our One, and our spouse is our Two.

This means that our relationship with God should come first, and our relationship with our spouse should follow closely behind. By doing so, we ensure that our marriage is built on a strong foundation of faith and love.

Challenges to the Vow of Priority:

Life is full of distractions and challenges that can threaten our priorities. From work commitments to social obligations, it's easy to let other things take precedence over our relationship with God and our spouse. However, we must protect our priorities at any cost.

This means setting aside time for prayer, worship, and quality time with our spouse. It also means being mindful of the things that can destroy our marriages, such as misplaced priorities and distractions.

Practical Steps to Uphold the Vow of Priority: To uphold the Vow of Priority, we must take practical steps in our daily lives. Here are a few suggestions:

Put God First: Make time for daily prayer, Bible study, and worship. Seek God's guidance in all aspects of your life and marriage.

Prioritize Your Spouse: Set aside regular time for your spouse, whether it's a date night, a weekend getaway, or simply a heartfelt conversation at the end of the day.

Protect Your Priorities: Be vigilant about the things that can distract you from your relationship with God and your spouse. This may mean setting boundaries with work, social media, or other commitments.

Applications:

If you and your spouse often find yourselves prioritizing other commitments over your relationship with God, consider starting a weekly devotional time together. Pick one evening a week where you read scripture, pray, and discuss how God is at work in your lives and marriage. This intentional time will help reinforce the idea that your connection to God strengthens your bond with each other, providing a solid foundation for your relationship.

In the hustle of your work life, it can be easy to lose sight of God’s presence in your marriage. Make it a point to pray together every morning before you leave for work, even if it's just a short prayer. This daily practice reminds both of you to seek God’s guidance throughout the day and brings His presence into your work environment, helping you support one another through daily challenges.

At social gatherings or public events, it's easy to fall into conversations that may distract from your commitment to each other and God. Make it a habit to share your faith as a couple during these outings. For instance, discuss how you see God working in your lives with others at social events. This will not only strengthen your relationship, but also create an opportunity to inspire and encourage other couples about the importance of making God the centerpiece of their marriage.

When you face conflicts at home, it might be tempting to focus on winning the argument instead of understanding each other. Try implementing a 'God-first' approach to resolving disagreements. Before discussing the issue, pray together asking for God’s wisdom and guidance. By reminding yourselves to seek God’s truth before asserting your own opinions, you will create a more peaceful atmosphere to openly communicate and find solutions.

If you feel your marriage is struggling to reflect God’s love in public interactions, consider initiating couple's community service together. Join a local charity project or volunteer at your church. This shared experience will not only serve others but also help strengthen your bond and connection to God as you act out your faith together, showing the world the love of Christ through your partnership.

Conclusion: It is important to prioritize God in the marital relationship. By examining Jesus' command to love God first, the creation mandate of marriage, and the sacrificial love depicted in Ephesians, we understand how to build a godly marriage.

Friends, a great marriage is possible when we follow the Vow of Priority. Let us commit to making God our first priority and our spouse our second. By doing so, we can build strong, godly unions that reflect His love and grace.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, we thank You for the gift of marriage. Help us to prioritize You and our spouse, to pursue each other with love, to work together as partners, and to remain pure in heart and mind. Guide us in our journey and strengthen our marriages. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.

Big Idea: Prioritizing God in our marriages leads to deeper love, unity, and strength in the relationship, reflecting Christ's love for His Church.

How can we actively prioritize God in our daily lives and in our marriage?

In what ways do distractions in our lives challenge our commitment to the Vow of Priority?

What practical steps can we take as couples to ensure our spiritual unity in marriage?

How does self-sacrificial love, as exemplified by Christ, manifest in our relationships today?

What are some specific actions we can implement to strengthen our commitment to each other and God?