“Living in Harmony”

Healthy Church: Preparing for the Journey  •  Sermon  •  Submitted   •  Presented
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“No honey, I don’t need the instructions and I don’t need any help.”
Famous last words of many men, right? How many of y’all have said something like that? Well, those were the words I recall telling my wife right before I finally began to put together the crib and other furniture that had been sitting in boxes in what would become our oldest daughter’s bedroom. We had bought one of those convertible deals…the bed converts from a crib to a toddler bed to a full-sized bed and I told myself it couldn’t be that difficult to assemble - I had the picture on the box to guide me! Long story, short, three hours after I set out by myself, mentally exhausted and staring into a face that had “I told you so,” written all over it, my wife and I completed step number thirty-seven of the instructions for the first piece of furniture. And, looking back, I could’ve saved myself so much time and avoided so much frustration.
Maybe I’m not alone when I confess to you that I often wrestle with a strong desire to go it alone. Maybe for some, it’s putting together a baby crib or for others it’s building a fence or others it’s becoming the best at your trade or for others it’s making sourdough bread. We look at what we desire to accomplish and we mix in a false sense of ability, and we often set out on our own. And it makes me wonder, why do we perceive depending on anything or anyone other than ourselves to be weakness? It makes me question, why are so many of us unwilling to accept help when it’s offered? And it leads me to ask this question:

What if we saw depending on one another as our greatest strength?

I raised this question because I need to remind you that we as a church are planning and preparing for a journey to add to and remodel our church campus. There’s quite a bit of work to go on around here to position First Baptist Devine to continue to be a beacon of light in this community for generations to come. And we’ve likened this time of preparing like the Allied forces in WWII did in the United Kingdom before ever loading up in a boat or a plane to launch the offensive we know as D-Day in June 1944. We saw two weeks ago that as we prepare to head out on this journey, at the very core of who we are as First Baptist, we must be anchored in the truth of God’s Word and as we saw last week, we saw the importance of the office of the pastor with respect to leading a local church by the Bible.
And this morning, we’re leaning into God’s Word once more to hear from the Lord as he inspired Paul to write to Titus after Paul has left Titus in Crete to put pastors in charge of the churches there. I’m so excited to share with y’all today because there’s so much richness to what we’ll hear God speaking here that will position us to thrive on the journey set before us if we have ears to hear and hearts ready to receive from God today. What we’re going to unpack is a bit of God’s blueprint for healthy community that is supposed to exist within any and every local church…what we’ll unpack is supposed to exist here. And for some of us, we may come to learn part of what God intends for the church and for others of us, we may be challenged by the Holy Spirit to examine whether we’ve been contributing our part.
What I want us to see first is that within the community of God, or if you prefer, within the church family, there’s supposed to be

Mentoring with Meaning

The concept of mentoring relationships exist all over the Bible. This isn’t just a New Testament concept.
Think of the Old Testament and the journey that the people of God set out on after being freed from Egypt. God had moved in miraculous ways to free his people and placed them under the leadership of Moses. And Moses was far from perfect, but he worked diligently at trying to lead God’s people, even getting to the point of neglecting his relationship with God, his relationship with his family, and his appointed task of leading God’s people by teaching them God’s Word because, well, there were so many people and so many needs. So one day, Jethro, the father-in-law of Moses pulls his son-in-law aside, and of course now I’m just paraphrasing, and Jethro says to Moses, “Son, you’re working yourself to the bone and do you see that no matter how hard you work at it, the work just keeps piling up? Maybe you need to enlist some capable hands to help you. Maybe you need to delegate this work that’s distracting you from what God has called you first and foremost to.” That’s mentoring.
Based on this, we’ll define mentoring as helping someone see beyond their present circumstances. And what we see here in the first three verses of Titus 2 are three groups of mentors that God has provided within a church family. They are the elders/pastors of the church along with the older men and older women of the church. I’m going to walk through these three briefly. First:

Mentoring with Meaning: Pastors

Paul writes to Titus in Titus 2:1 “But as for you, teach what accords with sound doctrine.” That “but” from Paul serves as a transition from what came before and reminding ourselves of what’s come before this, we saw that most recently Paul was addressing the importance of the pastor/elder to lay the foundation for God’s redeemed community by Titus 1:9 “hold[ing] firm to the trustworthy word as taught, so that he may be able to give instruction in sound doctrine and also to rebuke those who contradict it.” As we discovered in Titus 1:10-15, there were plenty of folk in the churches of Crete who needed to be silenced and rebuked by Titus and the pastors he would put in charge because those folks Titus 1:16 “profess[ed] to know God, but they den[ied] him by their works.”
So playing the part of mentor himself in this letter, Paul is guiding Titus to remember that the primary function of the pastor is to lead the people of God by the Word of God. And I need us to recognize something here in this verse, and it’s a bit of a reminder of something we discovered last week when we unpacked the qualifications of the pastor. In Titus 2:1, Paul instructs Titus to teach sound doctrine. That word that my English translation has as “teach” would be better translated to say because the Greek word there is the verb to talk or to speak.
And this sense of the pastor saying sound doctrine is more than what any pastor preaches. It gets back to what we observed about godliness being the defining quality of the pastor because the better sense is that the pastor is to “promote the kind of living that reflects wholesome teaching.” At any point in history, the church has been and will be a place for sinners to begin to be healed from their sin. In Crete and in Devine and every where in between, if pastors are not setting forth the example of what a life transformed by the power of the Spirit as the Bible is applied in their lives looks like, then there’s little hope for healing the ills of any who come to a church. Pastors are the first example of mentors here and there are also

Mentoring with Meaning: Older Men and Women

We passed out food this week to our neighbors and one of the things that came off the food truck were tomatoes. Unfortunately, it looked like they froze and spoiled and so I started to hear threats that the nearly a pallet-full of rotten tomatoes would be preserved to toss at me on Sundays. I might need to brace for impact when I qualify who Paul has in mind when he says, “older” men and women. Again, the context of time and place of this letter matters. We’re reading from God’s Word that was inspired by the Holy Spirit nearly two thousand years ago. Citing data from 2022, life expectancy in the United States is 77.5 years. When Paul was writing Timothy, life expectancy was about 30 years. Both then and now, there are always folks who outlive statistical norms and many scholars believe that Paul, when writing about older men and women, had in mind people aged…<ahem>…forty and older.
If that’s you, remember two things… First, I fall in the older category so take pity on an old man when it comes to your wind-up with those tomatoes…and secondly and more importantly, if you’re forty and older, I didn’t call you old, God did.
On older men, Titus and other pastors are to preside over older men and those men|need to excel in four qualities. First, these older men should be sober-minded, or said another way, they should be temperate. We often think of sobriety with relationship to alcohol consumption, but the full sense here is that older men should be wisely moderate in matters that sinful humans frequently pursue to excess. In other words, gentlemen, you shouldn’t be distracted by the pleasures and vices of this world which keep you from a single-minded focus on seeking first the kingdom of God. There should not be among you even a hint of sexual immorality or greed or foolish talk or foul language or crude joking. All of that is out of place. This plays into the sense of being dignified, or worthy of respect. You’re not behaving in a respectable way when you’re talking with cuss words or treating women as objects. Gents, to be useful to Jesus as a mentor in the church, you must be self-controlled, meaning you’re no longer acting on impulse in this stage of life you’re in. Also, we see that older men should be healthy in faith, love, and endurance. Gents, these are central Christian graces that those younger than us must see in us now for the journey we’re preparing for. The younger parts of this church family have got to see the trust you have in Christ in everything - the trust you have for your marriage, for your children, for your work, for your finances, and so on. They’ve got to see your love in action that has you serving others. And they’ve got to see that you’re sticking with Christ and his church. We live in an age where people approach church with a subscriber mindset. Like the way many of us subscribe to Netflix and Hulu and Disney Plus. We’ll be all in with the Netflix series but when it’s run its course, Netflix isn’t as interesting so we hop over to Disney to see what content they have. Men, you cannot approach your commitment to the church with a subscriber mindset. Elsewhere, Paul relates the work of the Holy Spirit in calling people to a church as being planted there. In an age where commitment is at an all-time low, men, the church family needs to see what the deep roots of commitment looks like by the example you set.
On women who have celebrated at least the nineteenth anniversary of their twenty-first birthday… See how I didn’t call women old? Take notes, guys. Can you see the measure of godliness you’re challenged to exhibit here for the sake of our Lord and his church? There are four qualities for older women here, too. Be reverent in behavior. Seek first the kingdom, sisters, and show forth God’s majestic glory! How? How is God’s glory revealed through your behavior? First, don’t be a slanderer. I’ll give you another quick Greek lesson here. That word that’s slanderer in english is the word διαβόλους in the Greek and it’s the same word we translate elsewhere as Satan or devil. What does Paul mean here? Sisters, you’ve got the resist the urge to be the devil’s favorite tool by ripping the congregation apart by being the accuser of the brethren. In 2 Timothy, when using this same word about people, Paul says that they will be people who are without love, unforgiving, and slanderous. You can read from the Proverbs to the words of Jesus to what James wrote, sisters, what you say is a central concern for the people of God. Your words can either build up or tear down and please hear from God’s Word, older sisters, your behavior should be marked by words that build up if you’re to be of use to the Master among his people. Your behavior around the table matters, too, when we see Paul charge Titus to ensure older women exercise self-control concerning consumption of wine. All this to say that older women should not be slanderous or drunks, but teachers of the good and godly life.
I hope that we might each see in part that when Jesus calls us into the family of God, he calls us to live collaboratively as we reflect his compassion and guidance to one another. I’ll have you know, a church isn’t operating as a whole body unless all its members, particularly the seasoned followers of Jesus, are actively contributing to the spiritual growth of others because when those seasoned followers are, that gives opportunity for the church as a whole to mature and develop. Older members, your Lord expects you to have matured into this sense of godliness for the sake of the church family he’s called you to.
The Lord expects this, because you’re an integral part into the younger contingent’s ability to go about

Modeling Transformed Lives

And like the first heading, there are three audiences here who are to be challenged in mentee roles. Young women, young men, and yes, even young pastors as Paul is mentoring Titus. And the first thing that we should observe is the wisdom of Paul as a pastor to connect the spiritual formation of these three groups to the followers of Christ who are best situated to encourage them. Young women are paired with older women. Young men are paired with older men. Young pastors are paired with seasoned ones.
Younger women, you need older Christian sisters in your life to encourage you to love your husband and children. Wives and mothers, you have been called to a sacred task and I want to tread carefully, because lots of men in my position clobber teachings about husbands and wives and parenting instruction from the Bible. I need you firstly to know that if you’ve ever heard someone suggest that Paul is against women, that’s absolutely false. The fact that there is any instruction here directed towards women was revolutionary two thousand years ago because the society then was undoubtedly male-dominated. Women had little-to-no rights. And so our first takeaway should be that what’s being said here is actually speaking to the grand importance that women, particularly young women, play in the home and in the church and ultimately in God’s kingdom. Ladies, you make a home in a way that most men are completely ill-equipped to do. It’s taken me nearly twenty years of training to learn how to contribute to maintaining the home my wife has made. I’m not always a quick-learn, as I’ve discovered. If you doubt what I’m talking about concerning a young man’s ability to make a home, go walk into the bedroom of a seventeen year old boy or a college boy’s dorm room a month into the semester and by the stench alone, you’ll know what I’m talking about.
And this sense of needing to be taught by older women how to love your husband and children-it’s real! No one doubts your love for your family, and yet, few fully appreciate the over-stimulation when you’ve heard “Mama!” shouted for the three-hundred and thirty-third time in the day and when it would appear that some relief may be coming with your husband’s return from work, he does his very best to check out. You add to the fact that we live in the south where our local culture puts upon women the expectation that they’re responsible for all the cooking, grocery shopping, laundry, house cleaning, and care for the children, it’s no wonder that women today are delaying marriage and electing to not have children. Don’t get me wrong - I think it’s best to get married and best to have children - I’m just saying that with how culture wants to shape our homes, it’s enticing for some to see that and say, “no thanks.” We need the gospel shaping our homes. And for the younger women who are married and have children, in a society like ours that does not have a high value on marriage and parenting, there’s a strong temptation to act or speak in ways that are not God-honoring, especially about your marriage, your husband, or your kids. They may each be far from perfect, but they are all gifts of grace from the Lord and this is where the mentoring of older Christian sisters is so important to you. You need their encouragement and reminding on matters like that the fruit of the Spirit is a list joined by ands, not ors. Galatians 5:22 “ love [and] joy [and] peace [and] patience [and] kindness [and] goodness [and] faithfulness” and so on.
Because, we notice in Titus 2:6, young guys have some growing up to do. Men, don’t think we get off easy because there’s just one thing here: be self-controlled. Said another way, “young men, check your behaviors and desires and thoughts and speech.” Check it how? Or by what? By what the Bible says elsewhere about the role of the husband in a marriage: Ephesians 5:25 “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” “Oh pastor, I prefer to read the stuff about wives submitting to husbands.” Of course you do, because your heart is twisted. Don’t worry, I’ll come back to wives submitting to husbands, but I need to do it in light of Ephesians 5:25 because gents, your wife isn’t a genie trapped in the bottle of marriage who’s expected to fulfill unlimited wishes to you.
In God’s design of the relationship between husbands and wives, husbands are supposed to lead by showing what sacrifice looks like. Men, the Lord’s at work in our hearts when our greatest desire is to see our family know Jesus, cared for well, loved well, provided for, protected well and supported. Even if it costs us our own lives. “Whoa, that’s a steep price, pastor!” Exactly! “Why?” Because the image of the relationship of the Christian husband’s love to the wife is a type of relationship based on Jesus’ love that would see him suffer and die so that whomsoever would call upon him would be saved.
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Young men, if you are Christ’s, then he is both Savior and Lord of your life. You’re under Christ’s authority. So when it comes to caring, loving, providing, protecting, and supporting, your motive should not be to get your kids to like you or to earn some affection from your wife. When Jesus is in charge of your life, remember that in whatever you do, you’re working heartily for Jesus! (Colossians 3:23-24) So when you grow up and realize that you lead your wife and your children by serving them, you’ll come to see that you’re glorifying Jesus by yes, going to work and putting food on the table, but also through the manly task of doing and folding laundry. And through the manly job of buying groceries and cooking dinner. And the manly job of coming with your family to church. And the manly job of crying with Christian brothers when you’ve come up short.
And young women, I bet that’s a man you’ll follow. Why? Because he’s walking so closely to Christ that it’s obvious he’s been nourished by the Master’s own hand, and you’ll want to be right there with him to receive the same nourishment from Jesus. And if he’s not there, the best advice I can give you is to talk to God about him and seek the council of seasoned sisters, because they know. And young men, if you have a sense that things aren’t clicking with your wife, you need a seasoned Christian man to help you see yourself more clearly because I assure you, chances are, the problem in your marriage is staring at you when you look at the mirror, not when you look at your wife. Maybe not every time, but most of the time.
And I’ll say that healthy marriages give way to healthy homes give way to healthy churches. And each of those can be true for us if we’re willing to do the work of looking to Christ, looking at ourselves, and reaching out to others.
I’ve got to move us on to how this translates to

Manifesting Faith at Work

In Titus 2:9-10, we see Paul’s instruction as to what sound doctrine is for Christians who are bondservants. Another word for bondservant is slave, so we remind ourselves that in the time when this was written, there were people who found themselves enslaved to masters. And while Paul’s instruction here is for how slaves were to regard and treat their masters, there’s something here for how you and I to apply in our work with respect to how we regard and treat our bosses or supervisors.
Here in Titus, Paul makes no distinction about whether the slave’s master is a Christian or not. So when we seek to apply this in our own work, this is truth to apply whether your boss is a person of faith or not. We see that in our work, we should not talk back to our bosses, but rather we should do what we can to please them, because again, the Christian is ultimately working for the Lord. When you don’t talk back to your boss, you’re pleasing God.
Also, we can see the direction to not pilfer, or specifically to not steal from our bosses. Let me say, if you’re a child of God, your faith should be backed up by your behavior. No Christian should ever steal and that obviously extends to the workplace. And yes, this would extend to pens and paperclips, but it also extends to how you work when you’re on the clock. It’s stealing to be on the clock, with your boss expecting you to be contributing to whatever it is you’re employed to do, and you not actually doing that. It’s stealing to be on the clock and checking the amount of likes on your Facebook post or playing Block Blast or Candy Crush.
And again, there’s not a qualifier here about your boss. In other words, you don’t get to try to justify mailing it in at work and staying on the clock or printing personal things or whatever because you think your boss is a jerk. In fact, it’s for that very reason that your faith had better translate into your work ethic… That’s what Titus 2:10 is all about. When your faith is alive and influencing your work ethic, you’re going to so greatly glorify God by your being respectful and upstanding and hard-working that even your boss will see how attractive the gospel is! Your bosses should consider you as one of the most dependable, respectful, and trustworthy people they have because of your faith and because of what the Holy Spirit is doing in your life.
Glorifying God is our purpose! As we seek to glorify Christ with our lives, we are simultaneously actively contributing to harmony in our workplaces, our homes, and our church. Harmony honors the Lord and it demands that we come to build relationships with each other so that we can learn from and trust one another. You see, here’s a hard truth for us. And it’s a hard truth because we’re so independently-minded. We need each other. God has designed us and the church for this. That’s plain as day when we tune into what Paul is telling Titus here. In fact,

Our church is stronger when we depend on each other

Depending on others sounds scary, I bet. But we aren’t depending on just anyone, we’re depending on brothers and sisters who have been purchased by the blood of Jesus. For us to get stronger, we’ll need to know what others need and that involves sharing our own failures, needs, or times we’ve come up short. We’ll need to be ready to offer assistance and support to one another. We’ll need to recognize that everyone needs help. We’ll need to talk to each other so we might have the chance of trusting one another.
It means we’ll need to get into each other’s kitchens and share meals together. Y’all know I’ve been harping on sitting up front, but how are you doing on getting lunch with people you don’t know well here? Why don’t some of our older members initiate and invite younger members? Or vice-versa? Get outside the comfort of your friend bubble and glorify God by developing relationships like what’s here in Titus. Our church will be stronger. Christ will be glorified and he will be praised.
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