Walk In Love

Ephesians 5:1-2

The Battleground of Relationships

Brothers and sisters, the text I would like to draw our attention to today is found in the book of Ephesians, Chapter 5, Verses 1 and 2.

Read the Text.

If we had time to journey through this Biblical letter fully, we would find a theme displayed in both Chapter 1 and Chapter 6 between which Paul sandwiches his teaching to the church at Ephesus. Many acknowledge that Paul is using a literary device called an “Inclusio” that is designed to wrap bookends around a text which links the beginning and ending with everything that comes between. In Chapter 1 He opens by proclaiming the abundant blessings that belong to those who are in Christ—and he describes them as being found in the heavenly places (Ephesians 1:3). And as Paul concludes his letter in Ephesians 6, he shifts our attention back to these heavenly places, there referring to them as “high places,” but here Paul declares that this same place of blessing is where we find ourselves in a cataclysmic spiritual warfare. (Ephesians 6:10-13).

Literary device or not, As Paul writes the chapters of this book he organizes it in a way that we should see where this spiritual warfare emerges from within his line of thought. Before he introduces the armor of God and the battle against the forces of darkness, Paul spends an extended portion of his letter addressing our everyday relationships. In Ephesians 5 and 6, he speaks of:

The relationship between husbands and wives,

The relationship between parents and children,

And the relationship between servants and masters (or in our context, employees and employers).

Paul is linking the idea that our greatest spiritual battles are most often fought within the ordinary relationships of our lives.

Friends, this means that the battle is not just "out there" in some abstract spiritual realm—it is in our homes, our marriages, our workplace, our family dynamics, our children, our parents. It is in the conversations we have, the social conflicts we navigate, the bitterness we harbor toward someone, or the love we give.

Tonight, as I walk us through two short Verses, I want us to first recognize this central truth: The ordinary relationships we find ourselves in are overwhelmingly where we will experience our greatest spiritual battles.

Just as the Gospel and the Word of God have the power to bring life to a lifeless or broken relationship, the Evil One is doing everything he can to destroy the what God has given. He seeks to mar the blessings, ruin the joy, and distort the good that God intends for us. Satan knows that if the world were to see God’s hand at work in our relationships, if they saw believers walking in wisdom, light, and love, it would be a most powerful testimony for the Lord and devastating to his plans.

John 13:35 “35 By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.”

It is with these things in mind that we return to our text for the evening.

There is a question I wrote down in my notes that is central to everything I hope to communicate tonight. A question that I pray will resonate in our hearts:

Do they know that you love them?

The Command to Walk in Love

Let’s now turn to our text for the evening:

Ephesians 5:1-2 "Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children, and walk in love… as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour."

If you are someone who underlines passages in your Bible, I would encourage you to underline the central command we are given in these verses: Walk in love.

Many people have different ideas about what love is. Some define it by feelings, others by action, and still others by what they receive from it. But here, in God’s Word, we find the true definition of how we are to love in a way that will shine forth the glory of God, because it is the same way which God loves.

Paul calls us to imitate God—to be followers of God as dear children.

Just as a child naturally imitates their parents, we are to reflect our Heavenly Father’s love in our daily lives.

I see this principle in my own life with my son, Declan, who is six years old. There are things he does simply because he sees my wife and me doing them.

When we get ready for church, he runs in to ask, "Dad, what are you wearing?"—because he wants to match me.

When we go snowboarding, and I say, "Sweet run, dude!" I find that he starts saying it too.

And when I raise my voice in frustration, I see him do the same to his younger siblings, trying to gain control of a situation the way I did.

Folks, our children imitate us. Whether we want them to or not, they pick up on our words, our tone, our habits, and our actions, they pick up on the way we love.

And in the same way, God calls us to imitate Him—to look to our Heavenly Father and model our lives after His love, His mercy, His patience, His holiness, His Character.

But this leads us to a crucial question:

How do we walk in love?

Paul gives us the answer in the rest of Ephesians 5:2—our love should be marked by two things:

An offering to others

A willingness to sacrifice

These are the two points we will now examine.

An Offering to Others

It is hopefully of no surprise to you but my best friend this room. My best friend is my wife Kirstin. We have been married for eleven years now. We met in math class in eighth grade and were friends very quickly. We threw erasers at each other when we thought the teacher wasn’t looking. We have already spent much of our lives together. We have experienced the love of one another for many years.

But if I am honest with you, when I reflect on what I give her now out of the gladness of my heart, I’m ashamed to say I have let things slip. The one I am called to prioritize in love, to love as Christ loved the Church.

I think back to when we were first married. My wife loved Fresca—I know, a little weird, right? One day, instead of flowers or chocolates, I decided to surprise her. While she was at work, I lined our first apartment from the door to the fridge with bottles of Fresca, filling the fridge with two-liter bottles of it. Why? Because I knew it was something she liked. I simply wanted to bring her joy, I wanted her to smile.

Another time, I decided I was going to do everything around the house— The dishes, the laundry, cook a fancy dinner, clean the house.

Now, that all sounds great, but let me tell you how it actually went.

I started frying something in the bottom of our Dutch oven, turned on the sink, and went to collect the laundry and dirty towels before bringing them downstairs. But then I got sidetracked by some clutter that needed cleaning up. I started the laundry, and that’s when it hit me—

I had never turned off the sink.

I raced back upstairs, and sure enough, the sink was overflowing. Soap and water were everywhere. I went to grab all the towels—but then it dawned on me, I had just thrown them into the washing machine. There was none dry to clean up the water.

At that moment, the fire alarm started blaring.

I raced into the kitchen—I had completely burned the oil and the meat. Smoke had filled the house. I turned off the burner, grabbed the Dutch oven, and set it down on the laminate floor, only to realize seconds later that the heat had started melting the flooring to the bottom of the pan.

Then I heard it—the sound of keys jingling at the door.

My wife had just gotten home.

I turned to run toward her, but my feet slipped on the soapy floor, and down I went.

My wife walked in to water everywhere, smoke filling the house, the fire alarm screaming, dirty wet clothes scattered across the floor, and the Dutch oven almost permanently fused to our kitchen floor, me on my back now thrown out.

Now, I am still surprised that she didn’t just backtrack out the door, shut it behind her, and drive off forever. But she didn’t. Instead, we salvaged my disaster together, and we laughed.

Friends, can I tell you something?

I failed miserably at what I set out to do. There was no competence at all in how I would please her. But my heart was fully for her, and she knew it. She knew could see the evidence regularly in my heart that I wanted to give to her and offer things for her.

Fast forward to today. I know how to cook. I know how to do laundry. I know how to do the dishes. But so often, she is the one doing all of those things. And the real danger is not whether or not I occasionally help when she is overwhelmed or tired—it’s not that we have divide our roles to give consistency, it is that somewhere along the line offerings have turned into duty. The burden to help rather than an offering, something I truly want to give.

Do you see the difference?

There is a difference between "I have to do this" and "I get to do this."

Love cannot be a chore.

It is not simply knowing the right things to say or do in a situation so that others will think we love them. Love must be an offering.

1 Corinthians 13:1–3 KJV 1900

1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. 2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. 3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

Friends, love is not simply doing the right things—it is the heart behind those things as they are acted out.

Love is not checking a box. Love is not completing a list of duties. Love is offering yourself to someone else FOR THEM, just as Christ offered Himself for us.

Which leads us to our second point:

Love is not only an offering, but it is marked by sacrifice. Christ sacrificed himself for us in Love.

Love is Willing to Sacrifice

We have seen that love is an offering, but love is also a sacrifice.

Agape love does not demand anything in return. It is given freely. It does not need to be reciprocated, nor does it keep score.

Jesus said in Luke 6:32-36

Luke 6:32–36 KJV 1900

32 For if ye love them which love you, what thank have ye? for sinners also love those that love them. 33 And if ye do good to them which do good to you, what thank have ye? for sinners also do even the same. 34 And if ye lend to them of whom ye hope to receive, what thank have ye? for sinners also lend to sinners, to receive as much again. 35 But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil. 36 Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful.

What are you willing to sacrifice for someone?

Your will? Jesus prayed, “Not my will, but thine be done.”

Your time? You may have a friend who just needs someone willing to sacrifice time to spend with them. Christ sacrificed every moment of His time on earth for our benefit.

Your sin? Perhaps there is something in your life that is harming someone else. Are you willing to give it up for the sake of love?

Your life? Christ was willing to give His very life.

There is nothing worth keeping if it prevents us from displaying the love of Christ.

John 3:16 tells us: "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

I remember reading a tragic but powerful story about love and sacrifice.

There was a woman who lived in a town where a series of tornadoes suddenly formed and began to tear through the area. She was home alone with her young toddler when the storm hit. As the tornado ripped through and leveled their house, everything was destroyed.

When rescuers arrived, they found the woman’s body without life any longer. But then they heard something.

A faint cry.

Underneath her body, they found her child—alive.

In the moment of destruction, she had draped her body over her child like a shield, taking the full force of the collapsing house upon herself.

This is what the world calls one of the greatest displays of love.

Church, this is exactly what Christ did for us.

He laid His very life down to protect those who would trust in Him. He took the full weight of judgment—a judgment that would have utterly destroyed us.

Friends, I know these are deep and difficult truths. The call to offer ourselves to one another, to sacrifice for one another, is not an easy one, But it is where the true beauty of love grows. The spiritual blessings, all the good that God wants to offer out to us as people is contained within the idea of love.

The greatest command, That we love God and that we love others as ourselves.

Consider the love of God displayed.

He offered Himself for us.

He sacrificed Himself for us.

That we would have Victory, Life, and Peace.

And so, the call upon our lives is not one of sadness, but of joy of blessing!

This should not be a burden, but rather our greatest privilege—that we get to live out the love of Christ. That we get to walk in love.

So I ask you once more:

Do they know that you love them?

It may just be the most important thing we can do.