Teaching Your Children To Pray

Someone once said, if you want to humble a man, ask him about his prayer life.

If you ask any of us about our prayer lives, I think we may all come to a point and say… i want to better my prayer life.

If you have any understanding of your need before a Holy God, and if you have any humility… you probably come to a point every time when talking about prayer… I need to pray more.

I need to come to God more.

I need to expound in my prayers with God more.

I AM NOT THE GRAND TEACHER ON PRAYER… (I think many of us would say this.)

AND SO… when talking about teaching our children to pray… this can most definitely be something to which all of us say… HOW? When I myself am still learning the intricacies of prayer in my own life… HOW AM I GOING TO TEACH MY CHILDREN TO PRAY?

To that which I would say… God has you exactly where He wants you.

WE MOST DEFINITELY CAN TEACH OUR CHILDREN TO PRAY… when we ourselves are continually learning to pray, and to give up more of ourselves up to God in our prayer.

We must realize that none but the Holy Spirit will give our children hearts to pray.

But we must also teach our children to come to the Father because of the fact that we understand that I HAVE THIS UPMOST DESIRE FOR HIM AND I CAN’T DO THIS WITHOUT HIM.

We must and we should teach our children to address our heavenly Father.

Jesus taught His believers to pray.

Paul taught his spiritual children to pray.

Disciple-Making Parents teach their children to pray.

Example - The First Teacher

EXAMPLE IS ALWAYS THE FIRST AND GREAT TEACHER

Jesus prayed in front of His disciples

They heard and saw as He spoke to His Father

Example if the Greatest Teacher.

Let them see you pray.

Prayer should be a regular part of your day

Pray as you start the day.

Stop and pray in the midst of trouble.

Tell them the things you are asking of the Lord…. Inform them of answers when you get them.

Pray as part of family devotions.

Great place to share prayer request.

Prayer for one another.

Keep a family prayer list.

PRAYER UNITES OUR HEARTS.

Pray in family groups

In the midst of familiy groups that you are apart of, allow the children to pray alongside the adults.

Imperfect examples will have an impact on them.

They will see the faithfulness over a period of time.

Encouraging Your Children To Speak Simply To God

Matthew 18:2–3 ESV

2 And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them 3 and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

Jesus here commends the faith and the heart of a child.

Children really are a blessing. They can reveal things to us, remind us of things I should say… of the simplicity of faith.

With our children as McArthur says…

[You have this child who is], helpless, trusting dependence of those who has no resources of their own. Like children, they have no achievements and no accomplishments to offer or with which to commend themselves.

They just come to Jesus with this pure need of HIM. And faith in just HIM.

Like these children, when we pray… we are addressing our need for our Father.

Romans 8:15 ESV

15 For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”

We come to Him with nothing to offer, nothing we c an do for ourselves, with pure need of just HIM.

He wants us to just come to Him and speak with Him freely what we are thinking, our desires, our needs, our temptations, our sins, the need of help to fix this wretched soul.

WE MUST SPEAK SIMPLY TO GOD.

WE MUST ALSO TEACH OUR CHILDREN TO SPEAK SIMPLY TO GOD.

I know that the words of my Father with me alone, when he prayed for me, and bade me pray for myself - not to use any form of prayer, but to pray just as I felt, and to ask from God what I felt that I really wanted - left an impression upon my mind that will never be erased.

Spurgeon.

Next Steps for the Middle Years

As our children move into the middle years, we can begin to give our children some specific help in this…

Give them structure

ACTS

Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, and Supplication.

HEART

Honor God with Praise. Examine Your life. Ask for help/needs. Request for others. Thank God.

PRAY

Praise. Repent. Ask Yield

PAST

Praise. Acknowledge. Supplication. Thanksgiving

Give them a method

They can use a journal, notebook, 3x5 card. List of longterm vs short term prayers.

Give them request

Think intently about request that are appropriate for younger vs older children.

FInd’s out what is in their heart.

Use bedtime as a confession

Nighttime is a wonderful time to ask, “Is there anything you need to tell me? Is there anything bothering your conscience that we need to confess to the Lord?”

Encourage them to pray for their current needs/wants

God is not santa… BUT, He does delight in giving His children good gifts within His will.

Story of Missionary Kid

The Teen Years and Deeper Prayers

One of the hard things about our children growing older… is that it seems like their schedules can often grow busier along with it.

If a family is not intentional about at least holding off some business for the sake of family worship, and intentional about walking with the teenager through prayer in the younger years or in the teenage years… this business can push the habit of prayer off the tracks.

BUT… God most definitely can deepen the prayer life of a teenager during this time.

Bettis gives us some pointers here to aid in this…

Teach them that prayer is both a duty and a delight.

Prayer is hard work.

Which is part of the reason is should be a duty within our disciplines. If it’s not… the enemy can easily throw us off this pash of consistent prayer.

Prayer is the easiest and hardest of all things; the simplest and the sublimest, the weakest and the most powerful; its results lie outside the range of human possibilities - they are limited only by the omnipotence of God.

But it’s also a delightful duty.

Teach them to ground their prayer in the Gospel.

“Praying in Jesus name is not just a cool catch phrase we put at the end of a prayer.”

Hebrews 4:16 ESV

16 Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Hebrews 10:19–22 ESV

19 Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the holy places by the blood of Jesus, 20 by the new and living way that he opened for us through the curtain, that is, through his flesh, 21 and since we have a great priest over the house of God, 22 let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water.

Teach them to pray in the spirit

As we grow older, we should look to the spirit for confirmation to our request. This involves listening to the Spirit through the Word and in our inner man.

Help from Piper

Let’s begin by reminding ourselves that prayer is not the only thing that Christians are called upon to do “in the Spirit” or “by the Spirit.” And by the way, the Greek phrase en pneumati is sometimes translated “by the Spirit” and sometimes “in the Spirit.” I don’t think Paul, in his mind, would make that distinction. For example:

Galatians 5:16: Walk in the Spirit. 

Romans 8:13: Put to death the deeds of the body in the Spirit. 

1 Corinthians 12:3: Confess Jesus as Lord in the Spirit. 

Philippians 3:3: Worship in the Spirit. 

1 Corinthians 14:16: Give thanks in the Spirit. 

Galatians 6:1: Restore a wayward brother in the Spirit. 

So, the two commands to pray in the Spirit in Jude 20 (“praying in the Holy Spirit”) and Ephesians 6:17–18 (“Take . . . the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, praying at all times in the Spirit”) are not unique. They’re part of the whole Christian life, which is to be lived in the Spirit. Everything we do is to be done in or by the Spirit.

Piper: Here’s my suggestion for what “praying in the Spirit” means: it means that our prayers are moved and guided by the Holy Spirit. That is, we are being prompted to pray by the Spirit; he’s awakening it and moving it. And the things that we pray for are being shaped and determined by the Spirit. So, it’s his power that carries the prayer, and it’s his leading that guides the prayer.

This will excite a regenerate teen.

Teach them to seek the Lord in a Crisis

Psalm 34:1–9 ESV

1 I will bless the Lord at all times; his praise shall continually be in my mouth. 2 My soul makes its boast in the Lord; let the humble hear and be glad. 3 Oh, magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt his name together! 4 I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears. 5 Those who look to him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. 6 This poor man cried, and the Lord heard him and saved him out of all his troubles. 7 The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and delivers them. 8 Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him! 9 Oh, fear the Lord, you his saints, for those who fear him have no lack!

Rejoice in and record answers to prayer

This will help build more faith in our children’s lives.

Standing stone… reminding us of God’s Goodness in our lives.

Deal with disappointment

There will be request that God says NO.

Like any good Father, He can tell us know. AND WILL.

Request for themselves

Encourage them to pray “Lord show me my sin and my need of the gospel.”

Psalm 139:23–24 ESV

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! 24 And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!

Ask, what is the Spirit leading you to pray for?

Encourage them to pray about decisions in grey areas

Our children will come to a place where they will begin to have their own decisions to make. their own convictions. Teach them to go to the Lord to come to these convictions.

Encourage them to pray about teenage arguments

James 4:1–2 ESV

1 What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? 2 You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask.

Request for others

Encourage them to pray for you

Encourage them to pray for your family

Pray for unification. For our family to be loving and a servant of the Lord. To be a witness to our neighbors.

Connect their prayers to destroying the devils works.

SEE “Let the Nations Be Glad, Pg. 69.

Jesus’ work on the cross was the beginning to defeat the devils works.

We must pray as the fullness of the defeat is still to be completed in the DAY OF THE LORD.

Encourage them to pray for those in authority

1 Timothy 2:1–3 ESV

1 First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people, 2 for kings and all who are in high positions, that we may lead a peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way. 3 This is good, and it is pleasing in the sight of God our Savior,

Encourage them to pray for their enemies

Matthew 5:44 ESV

44 But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,

School bully . classroom gossip. Tough authoritarian figure.

Encourage them to pray for the persecuted church and the unreached people groups.

Joshua Project.

IMB Pray

Both have apps aiding in this.

Conclusion

Remember that these things are a playbook and not a cookbook.

Passing this baton is by God’s Grace. Gad has to do the work. Put into practice what the spirit puts into your heart.

… our goal for our children is not a mere mental assent to the gospel, but a real heartfelt confidence in a God who hears our prayers.

Disciple-Making Parents teach their children to pray.

For Thought, Discussion, and Action.