THE PRO’s & CON’s OF COOKING IN THE KITCHEN
Behind Closed Doors • Sermon • Submitted • Presented
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INTRO:
We are in a series on relationships
How many in the room are married?
“Marriages are either getting worse or they are getting better, Marriages never stand still.” - Gary Chapman
I hope your marriage doesn’t get worse because you are here
BEHIND CLOSED DOORS
PT 1 Foyer - surface level, introductory level relationships
PT 2 Living Room - Relaxation (sabbath), Entertainment, Holiday Traditions (Family Memories), Place of safety, And an Altar to the LORD
PT 3 We are jumping into the Kitchen.
Some of my greatest memories and greatest breakthrough have taken place in my kitchen.
I remember a conversation that on for over 2 hours with daughter in the kitchen.
I have explained truth to lost people at my kitchen table
Cooking and sharing meals with others creates connection, intimacy, and communication
Jesus sat down and ate with His disciples and sinners on a regular basis.
When it was evening, Jesus sat down at the table with the Twelve.
The Last Supper (Passover meal together)
“Now come and have some breakfast!” Jesus said. None of the disciples dared to ask him, “Who are you?” They knew it was the Lord.
Then Jesus served them the bread and the fish.
This was the third time Jesus had appeared to his disciples since he had been raised from the dead.
Jesus cooked breakfast for the disciples
This was where Jesus restored Peter to ministry
MESSAGE:
Pro’s and Con’s of Cooking in the Kitchen
I call it the Good News or the Bad News
PRO: It’s More Nutritious
You have more control over the ingredients.
You can ensure that you and your family eat fresh, wholesome meals.
This can help you to look and feel healthier, boost your energy, and stabilize your weight
PRO: Better Portion Control
We are less apt to overeat when we eat at home
Most meals cooked at home contain less calories than meals in a restaurant
PRO: There Is A Cost Savings
ILLUSTRATION:
Hardees yesterday for 3 boys that helped me haul trash out of a house. $60
I actually asked 3 times how much the bill was. I was shocked! I wasn’t mean to her. She doesn’t set the prices.
She told, “Well then, cook at home!”
Kitchens are a place that we often collaborate about spending, savings, budgets.
PRO: The Kitchen Can Build or Rebuild Relationships…
5 Love Languages “The Secret To Love That Lasts”
Written by Gary Chapman. A very popular book that most of you are aware of. Dealing with relationships. (20 million sold)
I think these 5 things can be best accomplished In The Kitchen Behind Closed Doors.
1. Quality Time
Physically:
It requires time together to prepare, cook, and clean up.
Use it as a team building exercise.
It is time well spent together.
Spiritually
And just as my Father has granted me a Kingdom, I now grant you the right
to eat and drink at my table in my Kingdom. And you will sit on thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel.
2. Giving Gifts
Physically:
Bless someone with a meal,
bake sweets during the holidays
DINNER CHURCH
Spiritually
For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home.
I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.’
“Then these righteous ones will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink?
Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing?
When did we ever see you sick or in prison and visit you?’
3. Words of Affirmation
Prayer, encouragement, gratitude, communication, vulnerability, leave notes
The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.
4. Acts of Service
Cooking can be an outlet to express your love.
The smells and flavors associated with cooking can trigger positive memories.
Washing dishes that are not yours
Take out the trash
Folding the laundry
But among you it will be different. Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant,
and whoever wants to be first among you must be the slave of everyone else.
For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
5. Physical Touch
The kitchen is the second most intimate room in the house.
“Sex Starts in the Kitchen”
ILLUSTRATION:
Every Hallmark Christmas Movie, they are going to bake cookies together which one of them ends up with flour on their nose and it leads to their first kiss… “Am I wrong?”
CON: You don’t get to order whatever you want (1 meal for multiple people)
“You get what you get and we don’t throw a fit!”
You won’t always get your favorite meal
ILLUSTRATION:
I am going to quit going to church…
Why?
Because it is a waste of time. From week to week, I can’t remember what the preacher talked about anyway.
OK fair. Tell me, what did you eat last Sunday for dinner?
I don’t remember.
Maybe you should quit eating too. Each meal provides you with what you need even if you don’t remember the food you ate. That’s how church and sermons and Christian books are. Even music.
Spiritual Application:
Often relationship challenges are opportunities for personal growth and change.
But Jesus told him, “No! The Scriptures say, ‘People do not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.’”
Con: It requires a lot of work
Whose Role Is It?
STORY: Mr. Weatherford (“stay out of my kitchen, when they first got married”)
Some consider the cooking their role / sometimes they love it or hate it
Some cook together
My wife is a horrible delegator…especially in the kitchen
Do you have a serving/helping propensity or a selfish propensity?
Relationships are work!
Con: It will get hot, things will burn, and messes will be made
STORY: My kitchen fire in Michigan because of Chris Springer
STORY: Microwave in Silvis house caught on fire. I grabbed it and threw it in the ravine. I was probably 13
Time spent in the kitchen tests our relationships at times.
As they were at the table eating, Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, one of you eating with me here will betray me.”
Even Jesus experienced betrayal
We all will; we are dealing with “Hypocrites in Transition”
CALL TO ACTION:
Why Is Marriage So Difficult?
By Gary Smalley
Let’s begin with the problem marriage presents. Two independent people are trying to join together to make one unified team. Marriage is all about giving up your own rights and wants. The reason it fails so often is that one or both partners won’t give up their goals, plans and wants. Another factor is that men and women enter marriage with “storybook” expectations and virtually no training. Imagine flying an airline with an untrained pilot. More than likely your flight would crash. So to with marriage. I once asked a college girl what kind of man she would like to marry. “I’d like for him to be able to tell jokes, sing and dance, and stay home at night.” “You don’t want a husband,” I told her, “You want a puppet.” Her visions of a husband reveal one of the most common reasons, marriages fail. We marry with unrealistic expectations and few, if any, caring skills. In fact, most of us are rather fuzzy when it comes to our mates’ real needs. In short, most men and women have no idea how to love their spouse in a way that makes both of them happy. Years ago I asked five divorced women, individually, “If your husband began treating you in a consistently loving manner, would you take him back?”
“Of course I would,” each replied. But, unfortunately, none had hope that her husband would ever be like that. Because I knew one of the men personally, I had to concur with his wife’s hopelessness. If he were willing to try, he could win her back. Unfortunately, he wasn’t interested in learning. “What he doesn’t realize is that a lot of women are as responsive as puppies,” one woman explained to me. “If he’d come back and treat me with tenderness, gentleness, and understanding, I’d take him back tomorrow.” Another part of the problem is that most men and women lack understanding about the general differences between them. All of us know men and women are different. The differences (emotional, mental, and physical) are so extreme that without a concentrated effort to understand them, it is nearly impossible to have a happy marriage. A famous psychiatrist once said, “After thirty years of studying women, I ask myself, ‘What is it that they really want?’” If this was his conclusion, just imagine how little husbands know about their wives. You may already be aware of some of the differences. Many, however, will come as a complete surprise. Did you know, for instance, that virtually every cell in a man’s body has a chromosome makeup entirely different form those in a woman’s body? How about this next one? Research says there is strong evidence indicating that the “seat” of the emotions in a man’s brain is wired differently than in a woman’s. By virtue of these two differences alone, men and women are miles apart emotionally and physically.
Knowing we have so many differences and expectations how sad that men and women aren’t willing to learn how to strengthen their marriage. We spend so much time and money on the wedding and not on the marriage. When things go bad in a marriage most couples don’t even know where to begin? Instead of trying to learn what it takes to mend a cracked marriage, most of us would rather jump on the divorce bandwagon. We often violate the relationship laws inherent in marriage, and then we wonder why it all goes sour. But we wouldn’t wonder if the law of aerodynamics sent a one-winged airplane plummeting to the earth. Imagine yourself an aerospace engineer working for NASA. Your job is to put several men on the moon, but something goes wrong halfway though their flight. You wouldn’t dream of walking out on the entire project because something went wrong. Instead, you and the other engineers would put your heads together and work like crazy to solve the crisis! If the project had failed altogether, you still wouldn’t forsake it. You would study what happened and modify it to avoid similar problems in the future. Like the spacecraft, your marriage is subject to laws that determine its success or failure. If any of these laws are violated, you and your wife are locked into orbits, destined to crash. However, if during the marriage you recognize which law or principle you are violating and make the necessary adjustments, your marriage will stay on the right course.
Are you willing to learn?
Are you willing to Change?
What is one thing your spouse has asked you to change or do and you haven’t done it yet?
Will you commit to starting that today?
What is one thing that your spouse did this week that made you feel special or loved? Tell them right now.
It Truly Starts With Making Jesus Your Priority?
I have not departed from his commands, but have treasured his words more than daily food.
Taste and see that the Lord is good. Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in him!
Jesus replied, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry again. Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.
If it is not, are you willing to surrender your priorities to HIM?
