The Gift of Mercy

Introduction

This evening we dive into the last of the spiritual gifts with the gift of mercy.

Let’s go ahead and read our text tonight in Romans 12:3-15. This is the whole text concerning the gifts of the Spirit along with the exhortations that go with the gifts.

Romans 12:3–15 KJV 1900

3 For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith. 4 For as we have many members in one body, and all members have not the same office: 5 So we, being many, are one body in Christ, and every one members one of another. 6 Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given to us, whether prophecy, let us prophesy according to the proportion of faith; 7 Or ministry, let us wait on our ministering: or he that teacheth, on teaching; 8 Or he that exhorteth, on exhortation: he that giveth, let him do it with simplicity; he that ruleth, with diligence; he that sheweth mercy, with cheerfulness. 9 Let love be without dissimulation. Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good. 10 Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another; 11 Not slothful in business; fervent in spirit; serving the Lord; 12 Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer; 13 Distributing to the necessity of saints; given to hospitality. 14 Bless them which persecute you: bless, and curse not. 15 Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.

So far, our list of spiritual gifts that we have seen are the gifts of

Prophecy

Ministry (serving)

Teaching

Exhortation (ecouragement)

Giving

Ruling (administration/leadership)

And today we get to look at the last one,

Mercy

If, after today, you still are not sure which one is your gift, make it a regular prayer that God would reveal to you what your spiritual gift is, then start putting one of the gifts into practice for a little while. It may be that it will become clear if you have that gift or not. We will look at a “spiritual gifts test” later, but it is just to help you discover which is your gift. This “test” is developed by people, and the result may or may not actually line up with what your gift is.

But anyway, let’s get started.

What Is the Gift of Mercy?

The word translated mercy is the Greek word eleeo. It means: to have compassion, to show mercy or pity.

It is the virtue that makes us have compassion toward those who suffer and to be concerned about the problems of others.

The person with this gift has the ability to identify with those who are suffering and wants to help.

Those with the gift of mercy sympathize with people that are suffering emotionally and mentally and wish to be of some help to them.

What Are the Characteristics of the Gift of Mercy?

The example we have of someone who had the gift of mercy is the Apostle John.

Those with the gift of mercy...

1 ...Can perceive if someone truly loves or truly has joy or not

John was called the beloved disciple, the disciple whom Jesus loved. His primary focus is love both in his letters and in his Gospel.

What is the most attractive Gospel to read? What Gospel is the one we recommend to new believers or those wanting know more about Jesus? The Gospel of John! Why? Because John highlights love more than any other writer in the Bible.

The person with this gift is more perceptive of the presence of joy or problems in individuals or groups.

They have the desire to take away the pain or anxiety that others are experiencing and give peace and comfort to them.

Like those with the gift of giving and ministry, they need to be careful that they are not interfering with God’s plan to either grow or discipline others through problems.

2 ...Feel the need for deep friendships and desire to spend time with friends

John had established a deep friendship with Jesus and it seems that with Peter also.

John 13:23 KJV 1900

23 Now there was leaning on Jesus’ bosom one of his disciples, whom Jesus loved.

John is all up in Jesus’ personal bubble here. He has this gift and feels the need to be very close to Jesus. Not only that, but if you take a look at the next verse, it tells us that Peter, who never has any trouble speaking up, asking questions, or speaking his mind, asks John to ask Jesus who it was that would betray Him.

John 19:26 KJV 1900

26 When Jesus therefore saw his mother, and the disciple standing by, whom he loved, he saith unto his mother, Woman, behold thy son!

John 20:2–4 KJV 1900

2 Then she runneth, and cometh to Simon Peter, and to the other disciple, whom Jesus loved, and saith unto them, They have taken away the Lord out of the sepulchre, and we know not where they have laid him. 3 Peter therefore went forth, and that other disciple, and came to the sepulchre. 4 So they ran both together: and the other disciple did outrun Peter, and came first to the sepulchre.

John is the only one that writes about Peter and John running together to the tomb. Luke mentions that Peter runs, but does not mention John.

We also know that Peter and John were two of the three of Jesus’ inner circle, the other one being James, the brother of John.

3 ...Tend to react violently when their friends are rejected or harmed

Luke 9:54 KJV 1900

54 And when his disciples James and John saw this, they said, Lord, wilt thou that we command fire to come down from heaven, and consume them, even as Elias did?

John and James wanted to call down fire upon the Samaritans that had rejected Jesus. Jesus had a need of a place to rest on His way to Jerusalem, but since the Samaritans hated the Jews in Jerusalem so much, they did not much feel like helping Jesus since that was his destination, so they refused to let him stay in their town. John felt that there was no sincere desire for Jesus and they were not sensitive to Jesus’ needs, so he and his brother asked to call down fire upon them!

Those with this gift may close themselves off to others who are no sincere or sensitive to the suffering of others.

4 ...Place a greater emphasis on emotional rather than physical needs

John talks a lot about joy, fellowship, fear, trust, confidence, etc. (1 John 1:3-4, 4:18, 5:13-14)

When those that have this gift do seek to provide for physical needs, they do it as a demonstration of their love. 1 John 3:17

1 John 3:17 KJV 1900

17 But whoso hath this world’s good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him?

Others will look at those with the gift of mercy and say that they are more emotionally driven than logically driven, which can be very true.

5 …Tend to attract those with emotional issues/problems

They tend to attract people that are going through emotional struggles or mental struggles with anxiety, etc.

Not only that, but they are also drawn to people that are going through those things. When they encounter someone like this, they will sympathize with them and attempt to supply those needs.

John understood that importance of love and acceptance and many times over in his first letter to the churches, he writes to Christians so that they can know and have confidence that they are loved by God, sons of God, and in a relationship with God as their Father.

6 ...Tend to not be firm in their decisions (unless that decision eases the pain in others)

This lack of firmness comes from a desire to not hurt anyone else’s feelings or let other’s down.

7 ...Will often be found in the company of those with the gift of prophecy

The inner circle of Jesus’ disciples was made up of Peter, James, and John, but even so, Peter and John are mentioned in each others’ company quite often, especially in the book of Acts, even before James (the brother of John) is martyred for his faith.

The gifts of prophecy and mercy are particularly complementary. Mercies tend to temper prophets, whereas prophets tend to embolden mercies.

So, those with the gift of Mercy are those that are moved by compassion toward others who are experiencing problems. They have a need for deep friendships, and will not always be firm in their decisions for fear of hurting someone’s feelings or letting them down. They are driven more by emotions than by logic.

What Are the Dangers of the Gift of Mercy?

Those that have this gift will struggle in two main areas.

1. Not having mercy with cheerfulness

Romans 12:8 KJV 1900

8 Or he that exhorteth, on exhortation: he that giveth, let him do it with simplicity; he that ruleth, with diligence; he that sheweth mercy, with cheerfulness.

Those with the gift of mercy can see the suffering of others and get to the point where they also suffer along with others. This puts them in a position that turns their heart to sadness or bitterness as they enter into other’s suffering. This can cause “mercies” to become very melancholy.

They must learn to have mercy with cheerfulness. The Greek word translated cheerfulness does mean cheerfulness, but it also means “readiness of mind.” Readiness of mind is not a phrase we hear often anymore, but that means the ability to approach a situation logically, calmly, and rationally.

This means that those with the gift of mercy need to be able to acknowledge feelings without being dominated by feelings. It also means that they need to be careful not to allow panic or anxiety to set in and cause them to freeze or run away.

When there is mercy with no cheerfulness, those with this gift may...

A ...Cut off fellowship with those who do not see the needs of others

They may refer to them as “cold” or “hard hearted.” Instead, those with the gift of mercy can help those by pointing out the emotional needs of others to those that do not perceive them as well.

B ...Take on second-hand suffering

If not careful, mercies will take on other people’s suffering and grievances. Since they tend to be more empathetic than others, they feel as if they have been hurt or as if they are going through the difficulties that others are suffering.

Joshua felt offended on behalf of Moses in Numbers 11:26-29

Numbers 11:26–29 KJV 1900

26 But there remained two of the men in the camp, the name of the one was Eldad, and the name of the other Medad: and the spirit rested upon them; and they were of them that were written, but went not out unto the tabernacle: and they prophesied in the camp. 27 And there ran a young man, and told Moses, and said, Eldad and Medad do prophesy in the camp. 28 And Joshua the son of Nun, the servant of Moses, one of his young men, answered and said, My lord Moses, forbid them. 29 And Moses said unto him, Enviest thou for my sake? would God that all the Lord’s people were prophets, and that the Lord would put his spirit upon them!

Moses corrected Joshua and told him not to feel envy for Moses’ sake.

Do not fall into the trap of being offended for others. Don’t take on second-hand suffering. They say second-hand smoke is more dangerous than direct smoking is, and second-hand offense is the same way. You can become bitter at someone you don’t even know just because they offended someone else… or at least you think they offended someone else. When in reality, the person you thought may have gotten offended was mature enough not to take offense.

Mercies also tend to be offended or hurt by others more often because they are so emotionally invested in others.

C ...Become possessive with their friends

They may begin to think that every friend should have the same intensity toward them that they have. “Why don’t you call/text?” What they really mean is “Why don’t you call/text as often as I do?”

“Are you mad at me?”

“I noticed you didn’t say ‘hi’ last Sunday. Is everything ok?”

So, having mercy without cheer can cause those with this gift to cut off communication with others who don’t notice things like they do, cause them to take on second-hand grievances, and cause them to become possessive and insecure about their friends.

2. Being overly sensitive

The second danger is the danger of becoming overly sensitive or sentimental.

Romans 12:15 KJV 1900

15 Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.

Rejoicing with those that rejoice and weeping with those that weep can be taken to an extreme of emotional involvement. Those with this gift can be drawn into a state of anger and bitterness toward God because He has allowed someone to suffer pain.

Sentimentalism many times will produce...

A ...A propensity of being sought out by the opposite sex

In and of itself, that is not wrong. But therein lies a danger that is unique to mercies. Mercies connect easily on a sentimental and emotional level with others. Be careful how deeply you connect on that level with someone of the opposite sex who is not your spouse. This can make others think that you are flirting with them or leading them on; and it can also work its way into you developing deep feelings for someone who is not your spouse.

Whether or not you have the gift of mercy, it is best practice to not counsel someone of the opposite sex in private. It is especially a best practice for mercies as they can easily get into compromising situations because they tend to be very attentive listeners.

Create appropriate boundaries for that not to happen.

B …Emotional, rather than Spirit-led decisions

Again, there is nothing wrong with emotions just like there is nothing wrong with logic. But just like the prophet who should not depend on logic alone to make decisions, mercies should not depend on emotions alone to guide there decisions.

Every decision must be taken to the Lord and led by the Holy Spirit.

Those with the gift of mercy can become so emotionally involved in a problem that they no longer use logic nor seek the Holy Spirit to guide.

Sometimes, the person with the gift of mercy may be tempted to say, “I know the Bible says this, but we need to have mercy and compassion...” Remember, it is never right to do something wrong in order to accomplish something right.

C ...Sympathy for those that are violating Biblical principles simply because they are suffering

This can be seen often in relation to authority (be it government, church, home, work, etc.). The person with the gift of mercy may tend to think that others are martyrs when they are simply suffering the consequences of bad decisions. Those with the gift of mercy may try to ease those consequences, thus interfering with discipline or something of the sort.

E.g.: Person that is making consistent bad decisions is throwing their life away. It seems they are about to hit rock bottom, but the mercy comes in and instead of approaching the problem led by the Spirit, they jump into the sentimentality of things and cry and bemoan the suffering of the person that has been throwing their life away. Instead of encouraging them in the Lord to make right choices, regardless of how painful that may be, they get drawn into trying to help with needs, ease the emotional pain, and victimizing the person who has done wrong.

E.g. 2: Somebody says, “Man, Bro. Mike said I couldn’t lead or participate in this ministry. He’s mean and has hurt my feelings.” A mercy who is overly sentimental will come and say, “Bro. Mike, this person really wants to participate in this ministry, and they said that you won’t let them. Why are you being so mean to them?”

When I tell them that they cannot because they are unrepentant in a certain area of their life, or are just not committed to following God and only want to serve at their convenience, those with the gift of mercy may think, “Well, we are all human. We all make mistakes. I know the Bible says that we are supposed to hold certain standards, but we should just show this person some mercy, don’t you think?”

E.g. 3: And this one may hit closer to home...

Dad says, “Son, you have been disrespectful all day long, you have lied and disobeyed, so while everyone else that actually helped clean up the house without complaining or whining or screaming gets to sit and have ice cream, you don’t get any ice cream. Maybe tomorrow you will do what is right with a better attitude.

But then Mom thinks this is too harsh and cold-hearted, so she sneaks the boy a bowl of ice cream in his room.

That does not help the situation. It does not reinforce good discipline. It rewards bad behavior all for the purpose of not wanting someone to cry.

An Important Note for Mercies:

You are not the Holy Spirit

Do not take on other people’s burdens. We help bear burdens, but we take them to Jesus. When someone comes and tells you all their problems, do not take that emotional and mental stress upon yourself and bear that weight. The person that told you all their issues is going to walk away feeling great because they vented to you. It is not your responsibility to take on their anxiety, worry, or stress. As someone with the gift of mercy, it is your responsibility to show that person that they need to go to God with their problems.

Matthew 11:28–29 KJV 1900

28 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

They will not find rest for their souls for very long if they are depending on you to give them rest. Point them to Jesus. It does not say, “Come unto Mike all ye that labor...” Point them to Jesus. And when they do come to you, because people do need to talk through their problems with others, you go directly to Jesus. If you don’t, you will lose your cheerfulness.

Conclusion

Those with the gift of mercy seek to help those that are suffering. They are attracted to and by those with problems. They feel a need for deep friendships and tend not to be firm in many decisions.

They will need to be careful to be cheerful and to not cast logic out the window when dealing with problems. They will need to be careful of the emotional connections they make with those of the opposite sex. And they will need to resist the urge to show “mercy” to someone who needs to go through a level of suffering or pain because of wrongdoing. This is why it is SO important to be led by the Spirit.