The Unforgiving Servant

Introduction

This story was taken from a professor and priest from Trintity College Theological School in Australia. He also served on the ethics board of The Royal Melbourne Hospital and reviews Medical research from doctors doing research in the hospital. He states The second application, which was submitted for approval towards the end of my tenure on the Committee, came from a specialist children's psychiatrist. This doctor had applied to access the medical records of 40 young girls between the ages of 14-16 who had abortions between 2000 and 2002. A sample of 40 was proposed for the research to stand as an authentic study. The psychiatrist had wanted to contact the girls to follow up on how they were mentally coping with the abortion in their post-teen years in adulthood. Various aspects of the specialist psychiatrist's application were interrogated over seven meetings before it received the approval of the Ethics Committee.

The application received a lot of attention from me because the purpose of the psychiatrist's application was to find out how the religious beliefs of the girls, especially their understanding of forgiveness, had played a part in them finding or not finding healing from their trauma. The forgiveness of God for them for having aborted a life, and their forgiveness to the unborn child that was aborted due to whatever the circumstances were.

After my term on the Committee ended at the end of 2006, as a researcher myself at the Theological School, I contacted the psychiatrist and joined a team of five researchers. In joining the project, I, too, had to work within the stringent ethical guidelines I had contributed to the process before the application was approved. 

The year I spent with these researchers and the young women they interviewed was a life-changing experience for me. 

In a meeting with the young women who had aborted lives, I learned that even though five or six years had passed since the abortions, they were struggling with profoundly disturbing questions. These questions varied from questioning themselves: whether the fetus they had aborted was a living human being or not?; whether life began at conception or at some point thereafter?; whether the lives of late-term abortions knew the mother and her circumstances that led to the abortion?; and whether both the baby and God had forgiven them for what had happened five or six years ago. 

Some girls were torturing themselves to understand whether the life they had aborted was a precious soul that God had sent to this world and whether they had destroyed that soul.

Some others had never recovered from the ordeal of the abortion itself and their lives had never been anything different from the day that they had the abortion. They said they felt their life ended the day the abortion took place and have lived since without a purpose, without feelings and a soul.

We ended up interviewing 36 young women. In the process of interviewing and seeing the girls over a period of one year, we discovered that 79% per cent of them were being treated for depression and mental conditions. 56% per cent of them lived with suicidal thoughts, and 39% of them had attempted to commit suicide.  Typical secular counselling and psychotherapy for the girls had not helped them entirely.  Only 4% of the girls out of 36 had managed to live with normalcy.

We found that the trauma that the girls had experienced had shaken them so much that part of their souls had been lost in the experience. Treatments, drugs, psychotherapy, and counselling only helped with what was left of their souls and didn't work.

And there we came to introduce the importance of forgiveness – forgiveness for the wrongs they were suffering from and receiving forgiveness for the lives that were terminated.

For many, it was a long process, so the project lasted a year. A two-stage process facilitated self-forgiveness and forgiveness from the lives terminated.

One-third of the girls took part in psychodrama. Psychodrama is a creative way for an individual or group to explore and solve personal problems. In a clinical setting, it offers the opportunity for a person (and the group) taking multiple roles -- mother, unborn baby, God, doctor, etc, in this scenario – to act and out the experience for which healing is desired.

In a psychodrama, participants are invited to become therapeutic agents to populate the scene of one client. When acted out the scenario under the supervision of a skilled clinician, both the designated client and the other participants gain enormous benefits in terms of their recovery.

Two-thirds of the girls were taken through the process of confession and reconciliation. A few asked for anointing, and many others asked for both.  Once the lost parts of their souls were restored, medication, counselling and psychodrama did the magic. 

After a year of hard work, our study project was a great success. We were able to gather enough data to show that forgiveness exercised and experienced by the young women brought about healing in 89% per cent of the 36 girls who took part in the project.

The data the chief researcher, the specialist child psychiatrist, wanted were gathered, and a brilliant scientific article about the relationship between Psychiatry, Forgiveness, and Trauma Healing was authored.

Taking part in this project was my first lived-out and first-hand experience of the power of forgiveness. Before this experience, I had talked and preached about forgiveness. I had also experienced forgiving and being forgiven.

But taking part in this project with young women who had been forgiven and healed from their abortion experiences and witnessing the transformation they had experienced from being forgiven by the unborn babies and God was life-changing.

This experience allowed me to understand the gamut of what forgiveness is.

Background of Text

We don't understand or know the background to why Peter ask this question.

Peter being a Jew knew that they were suppose to forgive those who had sinned against him .

Peter ask to I forgive 7 times?

This question is derived from Genesis 4:15 “15 But the Lord said to him, “Not so; anyone who kills Cain will suffer vengeance seven times over.” Then the Lord put a mark on Cain so that no one who found him would kill him.”

But Jesus responds with the opposite theory to Lamech who was 7th in the linage line of Adam and he boasted with these words Genesis 4:23–24 “23 Lamech said to his wives, “Adah and Zillah, listen to me; wives of Lamech, hear my words. I have killed a man for wounding me, a young man for injuring me. 24 If Cain is avenged seven times, then Lamech seventy-seven times.””

In contrast to Lamech’s boast of unlimited vengeance, Jesus taught unlimited forgiveness.

Matthew 18:21–19:2 NIV

21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. 23 “Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24 As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand bags of gold was brought to him. 25 Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. 26 “At this the servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ 27 The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. 28 “But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred silver coins. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded. 29 “His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.’ 30 “But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 31 When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened. 32 “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33 Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ 34 In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. 35 “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.” 1 When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went into the region of Judea to the other side of the Jordan. 2 Large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.

Forgiveness

Webster defines forgiveness as the act of forgiving

The definition of forgive is:

to cease to feel resentment against 

to grant relief from payment of

There two realms in forgiveness

The financial: forgiveness and cancelling of debt owed

The Spiritual: Cancelling of the debt of sin

The parable that Jesus uses is financial debt.

His point is to emphasize:

the importance of tangible evidence of transformation in those who profess faith in him as Savior. Those who have truly experienced forgiveness are willing to forgive others.

Tonight we want to break this parable down in three parts and we will call them acts as if this was a drama

Act 1: A King and His Debtors

The king had demanded an audit to see who owed him money

He owed 10,000 Talents. One talent is about 6,000 denarii, give or take, with each denarius worth a day's wage for a labourer. (Denarius is a Roman silver coin used during Jesus' time and was worth ten donkeys)

The man owed close to 22 million dollars in today's money

A debt that could never repaid

The king demands that Him, his wife and children be sold to pay the debt

The servant pleads for an extension.

The King wipes his debt completely away

There’s no debt of sin so great that God won’t forgive a truly repentant sinner.

Act 2: A Man and His Debtors

This scene is to serve as a warning

Upon leaving he runs across a man that owes him money

Owed a hundred denarii- A couple thousand dollars

A debt that could have been repaid

Just as he had asked the king for more time, the debtor fell down on his knees and begged for more time. But instead of showing mercy as he had received, he had the man arrested and imprisoned. Prisons were harsh places. The cells were more like dungeons. They were dark and unsanitary, and prisoners were often tortured.

Act 3: The King and he Man

The scenes serves show us the consequences of un-forgiveness.

The king was told by others of the mans acts. We know that Jesus doesn't need anyone to tell him. 2 Timothy 2:19 “19 Nevertheless, God’s solid foundation stands firm, sealed with this inscription: “The Lord knows those who are his,” and, “Everyone who confesses the name of the Lord must turn away from wickedness.””

The servant underestimated the King, and although the King is merciful he is also just .

The king orders him to be imprisoned and tortured. This represents Hell a place of agony, but most of all its a place where there the presence of God is never felt or seen.

The King is the representation of God.

He concludes with words of warning: Matthew 18:35

Matthew 18:35 NIV

35 “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”

Lessons Learned

There’s no debt of sin so great that God won’t forgive a truly repentant sinner.

Jesus’ point is that no true believer should ever be so unloving and hard-hearted that they are unwilling to forgive others.

An unwillingness to forgive is evidence that a person hasn’t truly accepted God’s mercy. Because they have rejected the king, they are not fit for the kingdom.

Reflection

In answer to Peter’s question, what do you think Jesus taught about forgiveness?

Why do you think Jesus used a willingness to forgive as evidence of genuine faith? What is some of the other evidence of faith?

Why do you think the unforgiving servant was unwilling to forgive his debtor after the king had showed him abundant mercy? Why is it so difficult for us to forgive those who have offended us?

Read Psalm 101:1 “1 I will sing of your love and justice; to you, Lord, I will sing praise.” . How does the parable illustrate the two attributes (characteristics) of God David describes in this psalm? We’re not God, but how can we balance these two attributes in our relationships with others?

Read Psalm 101:3 “3 I will not look with approval on anything that is vile. I hate what faithless people do; I will have no part in it.” . Do you think this verse describes the unforgiving servant? Why or why not? Why do you think David says we should avoid such people?

How does the amount the servant owed the king represent our debt of sin to God? Why is the debt of our sin infinitely greater than any monetary debt someone might owe to us?

Read 1 Timothy 1:12–14 “12 I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me trustworthy, appointing me to his service. 13 Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. 14 The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.” . How is Paul’s attitude different from that of the unforgiving servant? How has this parable changed your attitude toward those who will inevitably offend you?

Read Psalm 103:12 “12 as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.” . How is our willingness to forgive others a witness to God’s willingness to cancel the debt of sin?

Read Matthew 6:14–15 “14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” . How does this parable help you understand what Jesus taught in the Lord’s Prayer about forgiveness?

Read Matthew 5:7 “7 Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.” . How is the parable a commentary on Jesus’ teaching in the Beatitudes? How does an unforgiving spirit show that we have never truly experienced God’s mercy?

Memory Verse

Psalm 101:1 NIV

1 I will sing of your love and justice; to you, Lord, I will sing praise.