Drop the Rock

The Mask (1994) is a comedy film starring Jim Carrey as Stanley Ipkiss, a timid and unlucky bank clerk who stumbles upon a mysterious ancient mask. When he puts it on, the mask transforms him into a wild, cartoonish alter ego with superhuman abilities and no inhibitions. At first, Stanley enjoys the power and confidence the mask gives him, but he soon realizes that it has a dark side that brings chaos and danger into his life. As criminals and law enforcement close in on him, Stanley must decide whether to keep the mask’s seductive power or rid himself of it for good.

The problem that Stanley faces is that the mask just isn’t very easy to get rid of. He throws it away, hides it, and even tries to sink it in the river, but somehow, it keeps coming back into his life. It tempts him, promising fun and power, but every time he gives in, it brings more trouble.

It seems that even though Stanley has recognized that the mask is causing him unmanageability and insanity, and even though he is capable of admitting the harm that it has caused him, and even though he is willing and able to try to remove himself from the mask — something else has to change in order for the mask to really stay gone for good.

Perhaps today’s message would have helped our larger than life character. Today we continue our series “Drop the Rock” which explores the 12 steps of recovery as a pathway of Christian Discipleship. We’ve looked at the importance of admitting that we all carry around rocks — big and small sins that we love to cling to, but that inevitably weigh us down and pull us away from God and the life that God has called us to live here in this world. For some this rock is alcohol, drugs, gambling, or some other highly addictive and destructive behavior. For others it is simply a posture of self-centered selfishness that manifests in other ways. Regardless, in order to be free of this rock and to drop it for good we have to do some work.

We have to admit that we are carrying the rock and that it’s not good for us. Then we have to recognize that God wants to help us walk away from these destructive behaviors. Then, we’ve got to become willing to seek God’s will and do the work set before us. Or simply: saying I’ve tried to drop the rock but I can’t. But God can and I think I’ll let him.

Then we move to a time of self examination, and I’m really thankful to Pastor Jeff for preaching a moving sermon about this. Being honest with ourselves about where we’ve fallen short and the harm that we’ve caused ourselves and those in our world sets the stage for what comes next, because without an utter desire to see ourselves as we are — with and without whatever it is that’s been weighing us down, we’ll never be able to rid ourselves of the rock for good.

I’ve alluded to this before, but here’s the big truth: the behavior you thought was making your life miserable — its not the cause of your misery. It’s a symptom of the greater problem. The problem is you. My problem is me. My problem is that my default orientation is not towards God. My default orientation is self-preservation and self-gratification. Its just the way of things. And what happens because of that is that over the course of our lives we develop ways and means to preserve and gratify ourselves. We develop unwritten and often subconscious ways of getting what we want when we want it. And we develop harmful reactions when we can’t fix, manage, and control the world around us to make this a reality. These ways of thinking and behaving are called Character Defects and they run so deep that it is like they are hardwired into our DNA. And we can’t rewrite our personalities on our own. We need help. And so, as the psalmist once asked, “where does my help come from? well it comes from the Lord — the maker of heaven and earth.” Or as the 12 steps says:

6. We were entirely ready to have God remove all of these defects of character

7. We humbly asked him to remove our shortcomings

These two steps are two sides of the same coin. But they are equally important — and the ability for us to truly experience transformation relies on our deep desire to rid ourselves of these things that weigh us down.

Remember the words of Paul from Romans:

Romans 7:15–24 NRSV

I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good. But in fact it is no longer I that do it, but sin that dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I that do it, but sin that dwells within me. So I find it to be a law that when I want to do what is good, evil lies close at hand. For I delight in the law of God in my inmost self, but I see in my members another law at war with the law of my mind, making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched man that I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?

Or my summary of this: I can’t stop being the mess that I am… what the heck is wrong with me?

Paul, thoroughly sick of living with himself has come to the realization that there is one who can and will help him change… and it is not Paul.

But this is the moment of willingness, to say I’m over me I am willing to allow God to step in and change my thoughts and my actions — and then do what the steps say… actually ask. Jesus famously says these words when instructing his followers on prayer:

Matthew 7:7–11 NRSV

“Ask, and it will be given you; search, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives, and everyone who searches finds, and for everyone who knocks, the door will be opened. Is there anyone among you who, if your child asks for bread, will give a stone? Or if the child asks for a fish, will give a snake? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him!

There’s not a whole lot of mystery here — put some legs on your readiness to change and then ask God for help!

But whoah whoah why do I have to ask God to help if God already knows that I need help?

Well, because when you ask for help you are consciously making a decision to cooperate. Because God’s gonna help but God’s not going to do all of the work.

There’s a story in Mark’s Gospel that makes us all really sad:

Mark 10:17–22 NRSV

As he was setting out on a journey, a man ran up and knelt before him, and asked him, “Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?” Jesus said to him, “Why do you call me good? No one is good but God alone. You know the commandments: ‘You shall not murder; You shall not commit adultery; You shall not steal; You shall not bear false witness; You shall not defraud; Honor your father and mother.’ ” He said to him, “Teacher, I have kept all these since my youth.” Jesus, looking at him, loved him and said, “You lack one thing; go, sell what you own, and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me.” When he heard this, he was shocked and went away grieving, for he had many possessions.

It makes us sad because if this guy only knew what was being offered! It makes us sad because we know how hard this decision would be for us too. It makes us sad because we know that no matter what it is that we are going to have to give up in order to follow the helping hand of Jesus into a new way of thinking and acting, it’s not going to be easy. It’s going to cost us something.

One of the biggest struggles in Steps 6 and 7 is the illusion that we are still in control. We may say we want change, but deep down, we hesitate to fully let go because our defects have become part of how we cope.

In The Mask, Stanley thinks he can control the mask. He believes he can put it on when needed and take it off when things get dangerous. But each time he puts it on, it pulls him deeper into chaos, making him someone he never intended to be. In the same way, we sometimes fool ourselves into thinking we can manage our defects—whether it's anger, addiction, dishonesty, or fear. We say things like:

"I’ll just indulge this one last time."

"I can handle this on my own."

"It’s not that big of a deal—I still have control."

But the truth is, as long as we hold onto these shortcomings, they will continue to shape our lives in ways we don’t anticipate. It’s only when Stanley realizes he is not in control of the mask that he takes the final step—throwing it away forever.

The Stanley that is able to rid himself of the mask forever isn’t the same Stanley that tried unsuccessfully to do so. He goes through a process of personal transformation in which he realizes that the mask doesn’t solve his problems, he gains confidence in his true self, and then makes a choice to let go.

Similarly, we will find that when we are willing to face our defects of character and humbly ask God to remove them and then do the work required, we will no longer be the same people we were when we began the journey.

This is the process of sanctification, of becoming less oriented towards ourselves and more oriented towards God. This is how we slowly but surely become more like Jesus. This is the work of God’s grace in our lives — continuing to refine us, continuing to show us what it looks like to live free of the rocks that we’ve been carrying for all of these years.

Imagine a world where you aren’t consistently sick of yourself for one reason or another. Imagine a world where you don’t walk away from interactions thinking “man I could have done that better.” Imagine a world where you don’t cause harm.

John Wesley, the founder of our church said that there are 3 rules we must live by: Do no harm, Do Good, Attend to the Ordinances of God.

If you’re struggling with coming to terms with your own need for these steps in your life I invite you to honestly reflect on one question: have I caused harm in the past week, month, year?

Once you spot it here’s what we do: We pray asking God to remove the thing that we do that causes us to cause harm. Maybe it’s an idea, a thought, or a behavior. Whatever it is. Ask for help. Then do your part:

Do good. aka do the exact opposite of that thing. Positive action tends to help rewire our thoughts. And then continue to ask God for help and guidance as you knock each new character defect down a peg.

You will be amazed at how transformational this practice can be in your life. This is the way that we become more like Christ and less like ourselves. This is how we make our world look a bit more like heaven.