Walking Wisely as The Bride of Christ

In God’s infinite wisdom and purposes, God decided one day to create a rainbow. Scientifically, we know that rainbows occur when the sun interacts with falling rain in the sky. Those water droplets act like prisms and begin bending and reflecting the light back outward in such a way that the colors of the rainbows form. God created that natural wonder in the sky for all the world to see and marvel at his beauty.

But the rainbow is more than just a scenic display of God’s artistic design. He assigned the bow or rainbow in the sky to represent something special between God and his creation. In the HB, the word is “bow” and it is believed that the bow in the sky is meant to depict mercy of God against sin and a promise of his covenant faithfulness to humanity.

Now the rainbow was created for the earth, but God designated it for a special purpose to paint a colorful picture of the mercy he would show this earth. I want us to think about that special purpose of God as we consider the relationship between earthly marriage and the eternal work of Christ for His people.

Review

Today, we are going to begin a 3 week look into the gift of biblical marriage as we move through Ephesians 5 and 6. This is following along with our practical look at how to WALK WISELY in the world. We looked last week as how to Walk Wisely as the Church and this week is similar but more with a theological framework. Paul does something in these verses that were read that cannot be overlooked. He does not just give good advise for husbands and wives. Instead, he solidifies the purpose of marrage in this world by showing its relationship to displaying the work of Christ for his bride, the church.

This study is helpful for as we know biblical marriage has been under consistent attack throughout history, even though the more recent times seem intense.  Issues like homosexuality, polygamy, divorce are not new sins and they only prove the effect of the curse of sin on this world and particularly the marriage relationship.  I use the term biblical marriage because all other perversions of marriage is not marriage at all. Gay marriage is not real marriage. Trans-marriage is not real marriage because it is not biblical marriage. Furry marriage is also not marriage because animals or pretend animals cannot get married.

Jesus is the answer to a healthy Biblical marriage.  But marriage has a greater purpose than establishing two happy people in a fallen world, marriage is designed to bring God glory by proclaiming to the world in a shadowy form the great plan of redemption that God was bringing to fruition in His Son Jesus.  

Let me tell you where I want to go with a few weeks on marriage.  Today, I want us to look at Eph 5 and see how marriage between a husband and wife was the divine covenant that is meant to be a shadow of the redemptive work of Jesus Christ for his bride the church.  God chose marriage to be a constant analogy for his love for his people.  But marriage doesn’t define what Jesus came to do.  Instead, the plan of redemption was in the eternal plan room of the Trinity and it was decided that a marriage covenant between husband and wife would be used as a picture of that redemption throughout history.  

The weeks following, we will trace marriage through the Scriptures and see how, because of the work of Christ, husbands can and should love their wive as Christ loved his church and wives can and should submit to their husbands as to the Lord.  

Part 1:  Walking Wisely as the Bride of Christ

Part 2: Walking Wisely as Holy Husbands

Part 3: Walking Wisely as Holy Wives

To begin, let’s look at Eph 1 again

Ephesians 1:3–10 (ESV)

3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, 4 even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love 5 he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, 6 to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. 7 In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, 8 which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight 9 making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ 10 as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.

Paul tells the church at Ephesus something very important in their understanding of Christ and the church.  God’s plan to send Jesus into the world to save a certain people from sin and death was established in eternity past, before the creation of all things, including the creation of Adam and Eve.  The church, a mixture of people from every tongue, tribe and nation across the world and history, redeemed by the power of Christ’s death and resurrection, chosen before the foundation of the world to be his people, would be the reason that Jesus came into the world to die for sin.  This plan of redemption preceded God’s creation of all things.

In God’s divine wisdom, he chose to make male and female in his own image, after his own likeness.  In this creation, he designed that man and woman would not be alone but they would join together in a God-glorifying union called marriage.  That marriage union would accomplish many purpose that God intended for the earth.  Marriage would lead to the spread of his glory and fame through childbirth and discipleship.  Marriage would lead to physical, emotional and intimate fulfillment as husbands and wives would enjoy each other as long as they both shall live.  Marriage would establish the home, where God was worshipped, and that God-fearing home would be a structure of society and the glory of God would overflow into the community around it.  

Paul makes this point most clear in Eph 5, Col 3, and 1 Cor 7.  The passage in Ephesians is considered the household code, as it looks at marriages, families, and work as the main components of society that is brought under the lordship of Christ.  Jesus initially speaks to the church of Ephesus generally as saved by God’s sovereign grace(1-2), bound together as the church (3-4), with practical wisdom for the church body in (5-6).    

Today, we are simply going to look at what the Bible teaches about the relationship between Christ and his church and how that relates to the covenant of marriage.  The work of Jesus Christ to redeem a people for himself is the backbone of the biblical marriage.  It is the foundation of how wives and husbands love each other, because of the grace of Christ that has provided salvation.  There are many marriages in the history of the world that endure and were full of love and human fulfillment but they lack the most important aspect- a relationship with Christ.  A marriage without Christ at the center is a boat on the ocean that has no ability to steer or propel itself.  The boat floats and keeps the occupants safe but it is difficult for that boat to go to its intended destination.  I believe that a relationship with Jesus is most-fulfilling path to a healthy and vibrant marriage because marriage was created by him and marriage was created for him.  

We will look at the relationship between Christ and his church so that we can more fully understand the roles of husbands and wives in a biblical marriage.  

Ephesians 5:21–33 “21 and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ. 22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, 26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. 28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; 29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, 30 because we are members of His body. 31 For this reason a man shall leave his father…”

4 Aspects of Christ's relationship to His bride, the church

1. Leadership

God as husband

Throughout the Scriptures, God’s people have been called the bride of God, with God being their groom.  This image has stood out through history as a way that God describes his faithful love to his people.  God is not only the head of his people but a similar picture is painted that God loves his people like a groom loves his bride.  

Isaiah 62:2–5 (ESV)

2 The nations shall see your righteousness, and all the kings your glory, and you shall be called by a new name that the mouth of the Lord will give. 3 You shall be a crown of beauty in the hand of the Lord, and a royal diadem in the hand of your God. 4 You shall no more be termed Forsaken, and your land shall no more be termed Desolate, but you shall be called (HEPZIBAH) My Delight Is in Her, and your land (BEULAH) Married; for the Lord delights in you, and your land shall be married. 5 For as a young man marries a young woman, so shall your sons marry you, and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall your God rejoice over you.

** Beulah Land song…is about God’s delight and affection as a Groom loves his bride.

Hosea 2:19 (ESV)

19 And I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy.

Jesus as Groom/Head

This imagery is further developed in the NT letters as Paul writes to the role of Christ and the church. In Ephesians 5, we understand that the church is not only considered the bride of Christ but also the body of Christ.  In statements were Jesus is called the head of the church, we understand that Jesus has been given authority over God’s people.  As head, He is supremely responsible for God’s people and he directs God’s people to live for him and his commands in a hostile word.  His headship over the church is for the supreme purpose of his glory, which is what Paul tells the Colossian church, 

Colossians 1:18 (ESV)18 And he is the head of the body, the church. He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, that in everything he might be preeminent.

As we consider Christ as the head, we must also acknowledge that we use the  term “church” not to refer to a building of a place, but a people.  These people are not the ones who merely attend weekly worship services and perform religious activities.  Some of those people are not part of the body of Christ because they truly have not been redeemed by his blood.  Those who have truly repented of their sins and trusted fully in Christ alone to save them are the ones who belong to the body of Christ.  

2 Timothy 1:9 (ESV)

9 who saved US and called US to a holy calling, not because of our works but because of his own purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began,

We saw this same idea earlier that God’s love for his people, the bride of Christ, was a love not displayed only when Jesus entered the world, but actually, a predestined love, that was decided upon a chosen people, before they were ever born and before the world was even formed.  There is such a hangup about the doctrine of election in church circles today.  When God’s special love is described, many decry the injustice of it. 

But if we relate it to human marriage, should we equally decry the unjust act loving our wives more than other women in the world.  Is it unfair to set a special love toward one partner, caring for and nurturing her uniquely from all other women in the world?  That is preposterous.  God designed husbands and wives to to love each other in that way so that God’s electing love would be understood.  

Church’s Response: Submission

Within that displayed love of Christ, the church as its bride responds to that love with submission.  Shown in the response specifically by the wife to the husband in v 22, the submission is founded in a wife’s relationship with her Lord.  

24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

The NT word “submission” is a compound greek work. The root of that word is TASSO which means something that is set in place or instituted.  In Romans 13:1, God is the one who sets in place or institutes the governing authorities over us.  The second part of the word for submission is HYPO which is interpreted as UNDER.  Combining the word, HYPOTASSO means “to set or order something underneath someone or something else.”  To submit to the Lord is to acknowledge that He has authority and leadership over your life.  

His leadership comes from an unimaginable love and his greatest desire for His people is for their welfare and their good.  He leads over us with compassion and grace.  It is a rule that gives strength in our weakness, encouragements in our failures, and power in our frailty.  He is a good husband to his church!

You cannot belong to the church if you are not submitted the Lord Jesus as your authority. You must be willing to deny yourself of things that dishonor God or things that are not the will of plan of God for your life. Are you willing by faith to surrender all of yourself to Jesus?

2. Sacrificial Love

Ephesians 5:23 (ESV)

23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.

Ephesians 5:25 (ESV)

25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,

Secondly, Paul says that Jesus is the Savior/ Redeemer of the church.  He is not implying that the earthly husband is the Savior of his wife, but there might be a subtle application to the husbands role as protector of the wife. But without comparison, Jesus came to the earth to accomplish for his bride what no other husband on this earth can accomplish: spiritual salvation.  He is the Savior of the body, providing an escape from the wrath of God against sin.  He cleanses us from all unrighteousness through his atoning sacrifice of his own life upon the cross.  He accomplished salvation in a most perfect way for the good and welfare of his bride and for his supreme glory.  

John Piper states in his book, This Momentary Marriage, that Christ accomplished justification and righteousness for his people because we are incapable of accomplishing them for ourselves serving us in HIs role as Savior. He writes, 

Not only are we forgiven because of Christ, but God also declares us righteous because of Christ. God requires two things of us: punishment for our sins and perfection in our lives. Our sins must be punished, and our lives must be righteous. But we cannot bear our own punishment (Ps. 49:7–8), and we cannot provide our own righteousness. “None is righteous; no, not one” (Rom. 3:10). Therefore, God, out of his immeasurable love for us, provided his own Son to do both. Christ bears our punishment, and Christ performs our righteousness. And when we receive Christ (John 1:12), all of his punishment and all of his righteousness is counted as ours

Paul alludes this this work of Christ in verse 26-27, 

26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.

Paul continues his theological treatise on the foundation of marriage by reminding the Ephesians what was accomplished by Christ’s work and how that plays into marriage.  To understand this section, we must understand the context of the marriage practices in Israel.  

Old Ways

First, there was the betrothal of a man to a woman.  This was actually the legal union of the marriage and typically came when a woman was chosen by the family to marry the son.  There was an giving of gifts to the bride’s parents and to the bride during this stage of betrothal. Then came the wedding ceremony which consisted of the procession, marriage feast and consummation and celebration.  During the procession, the groom and his friends (groomsmen) would proceed to the brides home to receive her, as she is adorned in beauty in her wedding attire.  The wedding party would then return to the home of the groom, often escorted by the bridesmaids and groomsmen singing and dancing along the way.  The bride and groom would then make their vows together before God and witnesses, feast at the marriage supper and then consummate the marriage privately.  Finally for the entirety of the week or even longer, the celebration of bride and groom would ensue. 

(Sidenote) We really should change the way marriages are performed in the Christian church. I know it would go against the grain of culture, but what if it was the groom who walked the aisle, with the view of the entire assembly, meeting the bride at the altar. This is more biblically accurate of the groom coming for his bride instead of the bride coming for her groom.

Paul makes connection of these practices when he states that Jesus sanctifies his bride, by cleansing her and presenting her to himself.  Typically a bride would bath on her wedding day (always a plus) and be adorned in purity and beauty awaiting her husband.  Paul sees this represented in the work of Christ, as he himself does all that is necessary to cleanse the Bride of all sin.  That purifying and cleansing work is seen in forgiveness of sins provided by Christ.  The church is promised that by faith in Christ our sins are “tread underfoot and cast into the depth of the sea (Micah 7:9).  The promises of God state in 1 John 1:8-9 “If you confess your sin, Jesus is faithful to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”  That cleansing work not only occurs at salvation but the work of the Holy Spirit and God’s work continues to cleanse us throughout our new life in Christ until he returns again, as the groom coming for his bride on their wedding day.  

Philippians 1:6 (ESV)6 And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.

This is why the Christian marriage is the strongest of marriages. When two people follow Jesus, they understand the sacrifice that was made by Jesus coming into the world, setting aside the glory and worship of heaven, putting on human flesh, living in a sinful world and dying a criminals death, facing the wrath of God so that the bride of Jesus could escape sin and death.  He becomes the source and model of Christian self-sacrifice. 

Church’s response: Faith

The church is called to put our faith in our husband.  We must consider the sacrifice that he made for us and  fully trust that his sacrifice is all that was necessary for the forgiveness of sin, justification and escape from the wrath to come. Jesus had this encounter with a religious leaders named Nicodemus who came to him seeking understanding as to how a person could inherit eternal life.  He told Nicodemus that eternal life only comes to those who have been born again.  This new birth comes to those who believe in Jesus Christ alone for their salvation.  He told Nicodemus

John 3:16–18 (ESV)

16 “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. 18 Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God.

Church, our response to our husband is to believe that He did all that was necessary to provide a rescue from the punishment for our sins.  We cannot make our husband love us more by doing good deeds that impress us.  The idea of our union with Christ is that his love is not conditioned on our spiritual merits.  He loved us before we ever could do anything spiritual or evil.  His love came to us before time began and it will last into eternity.  Let us believe and trust Him!

3. Provision

28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.

This next aspect of the relationship of Christ and his bride, the church is his provision.  Paul once again acknowledges the role of Christ as the provider for the Bride just as the husband should be the provider for his wife and the home.  But in order to understand Paul’s thought process, lets jump all the way down to verse 31, where Paul quotes Gen. 2:24.  Paul is looking back to the first marriage covenant between Adam and Eve were in the union of marriage, they became one flesh.  It is interesting that God ordains marriage in such a way, where he says “a man shall leave his father and mother and become one flesh.”  I wonder if Adam and Eve stopped God there and asked, UH, what’s a father and mother?  

But Paul want to point back to that day because it that beautiful insinuation of the covenant of marriage, Paul sees Jesus and the church portrayed.  A man and woman consummate a marriage union and they become one body in a sense.  They possess two physical bodies but yet they join together to become one body to share life together, enjoy each other companionship, and literally complete one another.  This permanent bond is described in the “leaving of mother and father and joining together in one flesh.”  They are joined in a mysteriously spiritual way before God and witness that goes beyond intimacy and includes their purpose before God.  They individually worship God as believers in Jesus.  In other words, salvation comes to individuals alone and not to groups.  A wife is not saved from sin because her husband is or vice versa. Yet as one body in Jesus, a married couple has a purpose before God to glorify God in their marriage and in their home. They work together in that end until their last day on this earth.  It is a dual responsibly before God as individual and as a couple.  

We will begin looking at the detailed roles of that marriage union next week, but the bond between husband and wife is a shadow of the bond between Christ and His church.  This is the mystery that Paul is considering as he highlights the permanency and intimacy of Christ and his church, as a head should not be separated from its body.  It is astounding when you consider the union with Christ and the church as as a restoration of all that was severed when sin entered through the first marriage.  The first marriage brought division from God and man as Adam and Eve rebelled against God.  They likewise filled the earth with sinners as generations after generations were born under the curse of sin, but when Jesus came, the better Adam to save a people for himself, there is resoration is this second marriage.  Jesus, God’s son brings restoration back to God through his death so that they are one again with Christ as head.  This ultimately comes to its full conclusion when Christ comes again consummate all things on heaven and earth but yet it already has occurred in our spiritual salvation.  

In that union, we are told by Paul that Jesus nourishes and cherishes the church body that He gave so much for.  This is a model for the husband but its a greater truth for all try church.  These words literally mean “to feed” and “to comfort” and Paul sees this beautiful mystery laid before us in both earthly marriage and the union with Christ and the church.  Christ is our provider, giving us all we need to feast upon his riches and his provision.  Chiefly, he provides our spiritual needs but we cannot divorce his physical provision as well.  He feeds us, provides physical health, blessing and prosperity.  He gives our earthly shells physical pleasures that are for our good and enjoyment.  We should not be like ascetics in church history that saw fit to rob themselves of all earthly pleasures.  Some pleasures on this earth, like family, recreation, food, etc are given by God for our enjoyment and our good.  This is Christ providing for his own body like an athlete sticking to a nutritious diet.  

But he also comforts us in affliction, like a balm to an open wound.  Christ is our comfort, specifically sending us the Holy Spirit, who is the Comforter to walk with us in our journey in a hurting world.  We can know that whatever afflition we face, God has provided the resources to comfort our worst of tragedies and hurts.  

Psalm 23:4 (ESV)

4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

Psalm 119:50 (ESV)

50 This is my comfort in my affliction, that your promise gives me life.

Church’s response: Worship

The response to the church when considering Christ as head, as savior, as provider then is to bow before Him in worship that is due to his name.  He has come and will come again to receive us to himself as a groom to his bride on her wedding day.  For all his gracious work to save us by his own blood, to provide for us all we need, to complete his work in us until the very end when he comes as a groom to receive us into his presence for all eternity.  This leads us to worship him as it is depicted that the church will do for all eternity.  

Revelation 19:6–9 (ESV)

6 Then I heard what seemed to be the voice of a great multitude, like the roar of many waters and like the sound of mighty peals of thunder, crying out, “Hallelujah! For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns. 7 Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready; 8 it was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure”— for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints. 9 And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.” And he said to me, “These are the true words of God.” 4. Purpose

Finally, going back to the passage of Eph 1 we see that the church exists to be ambassadors for God in the way we live in this world. Ephesians 1:4 “4 just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we would be holy and blameless before Him. In love”

Holy and blameless before Him is not just an private position before God but it manifest publically in teh world around us. As the redeemed church, elected before the foundation of teh world, it is the work of Christ that saves us and purifies us and makes us holy and righteous so that we can represent him as a Holy nation set apart from the world. At salvation, the church has an immediate discovery of our true purpose and identity in this world that was a mystery to us and the world beforehand.

Now revealed, we live unto the glory of God and not man. We live to proclaim his excellencies over all the earth and not seeking to be satisfied in earthly pleasures. Many are not living for Jesus because their hope is still in themselves and what they can muster up in strength.

But knowing that God chose to save us so that we might represent him gives us the Hallmark vibes like a man who stops at nothing to get to his love in order to be with her. He climbs mountains, he runs through a torrential downpour, he dies upon the cross for sin.

Ephesians 2:4 “4 But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us,”

What a love….what a cost. We stand forgiven at the cross! (This the power of the cross)

Church’s response: Faithfulness

Romans 12:1 “1 Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.”

Because we have purpose and identity in Christ, we are faithful to serve as His bride. We work tirelessly to honor our groom, proclaiming his leadership and authority, speaking of his great sacrificial love and how he saved us, and being grateful for the spiritual and physical provision of our lives.

LORDS SUPPER~Stuart

Prayers:

Questions:

What is your favorite things about weddings?

What aspects of American weddings should be left out of the ceremony and why?

John Piper writes in the Meaning of Marriage:

“I want to see pastors take the initiative to teach and preach and help to build a culture of simplicity in the church that makes the focus of marriage celebrations the Lord Jesus; the Christ-exalting meaning of marriage; the awesome importance of the vows; and the preciousness of the people, the lovers—not the clothing, the flowers, the location, the music, and the whole production that can make the actual act of God in marriage seem like an incidental prelude to the big, fancy party afterwards.” (Piper, Meaning of Marriage)

Do you agree or disagree? Why?

Read Isaiah 62:2-5

Why is God considered the husband of his people? What is the HS trying to communicate about God’s love?

What other imagery in the OT also reflects the marriage relationship between God and His people. (idolatry was called adultery, etc)

What is the defintion of the church, the bride of Christ?

Name one of the aspects of the relationship between Christ and His Church that was mentioned on Sunday. Where else do we see these truths in the Scriptures besides our passage in Ephesians

(When these points are mentioned, ask:)

Leadership (church submits)

How does the church today often want to rule itself instead submitting to his leadership over us?

With Christ as the head, how is the church led by Him? How do we know what Christ wants us to accomplish?

Sacrificial Love (church believes)

Why is love the great theme of the sacrifice of Christ for sinners?

Provision (church worships)

Purpose (church is steadfast)