Humble me, Lord

Some want to be angels. 

Some want to be prophets.

Some want to be elders in His kingdom.

Some want to be surrounded by his love.

Some want to have peace after a life of struggle.

But as for me, I just want to be a doormat in my father’s house. 

I don’t need power or prestige or good feelings or respect or recognition.

I don’t need to eat at His table.

I’m not worthy of His table.

Just give me the lowest spot.

As far to the ground as I can be, give me that spot.

I don’t need anything else.

You can take the rest.

That’s all I ask, dad.

That’s all that I have to say.

I’m stunned by Your beauty, Lord.

I see you work in these hearts around me.

I see you work in me as I accept you more and more.

I see you work through me as I put into practice Your heart.

I’m shocked at Your love, it’s such a deep, real kind of love. 

I didn’t know someone could lower themselves as much as You did for us.

You humbled Yourself.

Why would you do that?

Lord, you know that everyone will see on judgment day that you are God.

You didn’t need to lower Yourself.

It was fair, it was right, it was just.

But you couldn’t turn away from me.

You couldn’t turn away from us.

A chance of me being in Your house excited You.

How is that?

How is that possible?

Who am I that you would notice me? That you would give me more than a second of attention.

I want to go lower than the woman who poured that fragrance from her alabaster jar.

I want to go lower than the man who hadn’t walked in decades by that pool where people put their hope in false gods.

Bring me lower, God.

Humble me, Lord. 

These men who think You give money to the righteous. Lord, woe to them! They don’t understand. Forgive them, they know not what they do. (Prosperity Gospel)

As for me, I need no lifting.

Eternity as the doormat for the house of the Lord is more than enough.

Let the people brush their feet on me.

Let me be stepped on, Lord.

You gave it all, so, so do I.

They want Your presence, Lord.

Grant them their wish.

Give no regard to me.

I want just to see their faces as they leave Your house.

I want to see their change.

Their joy.

Their peace.

That’s all I ask Lord.

The doormat of Your house.

The least of Your creation in Your kingdom.

Humble me, Lord.

I’m through with myself.

I just want You.

As I grow closer to living with a heart that is just like God’s, I find myself being lifted up. At my baptism, and my day-to-day life, I get encouragements from friends, from people I don’t even know, from leaders from my family. Sure I make my mistakes, everyone does. There are times in which I have been humbled. But I’m being lifted too high for this. I don’t need any recognition. I don’t want any recognition. The chance of me being tempted to find joy and fulfillment in this is much too frightening. Lower me Lord. This is my radical prayer today. In my humility, let me explode with the light of Your presence and Your glory and Your love and Your affections for this world. And let no one be able to trace back to the fact that it was me. But only that you would see it. Only that you would get the glory. How’s that for radical? 

“You who stand in the house of the Lord, In the courts of the house of our God, Praise the Lord, for the Lord is good; Sing praises to His name, for it is pleasant.”

Psalms 135:2-3 NKJV

“Lord, You have heard the desire of the humble; You will prepare their heart; You will cause Your ear to hear,” 

Psalms 10:17 NKJV

Written on August 8, 2024