Family Relationships

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DECLARATION:

Ephesians 2:20–22 (ESV)

20 built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus himself being the cornerstone, 21 in whom the whole structure, being joined together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord. 22 In him you also are being built together into a dwelling place for God by the Spirit.

Our church family is built by God, upon the foundation of the apostles and prophets, and with Christ Jesus as the cornerstone.

We are joined together by union with Christ, we are growing, we are a dwelling place of God by his Spirit, and we are missionaries.

Prayer for...

INTRODUCTION:

Review:

We believe the Church isn’t defined by a building or a brand—it’s defined by Jesus, His practices, and His mission. In this series, Our Distinctives, we’ll explore the beliefs that make SVC who we are: Spirit Empowerment, Sound Doctrine, Family Relationships, Empowering Leadership, Kingdom Partnership, Shared Mission

These beliefs are more than just statements—they’re guides. They determine what we do and what we don’t do, where we focus our energy and where we don’t, what we say yes to—and just as importantly—what we say no to. They shape our priorities, our culture, and our vision.

If you’ve ever wondered, “How Does SVC Do Ministry?”—this is the series for you. Because clarity brings unity. And unity brings the power of God.

WHAT IS THE REASON WHY THIS MESSAGE IS BEING SHARED / WHAT IS THE PROBLEM THIS MESSAGE IS ANSWERING?…

Many people today feel isolated, disconnected, and hurt by broken relationships—both in their natural families and in the church. 

In a world marked by division, superficial connections, and conditional love, people are hungry for belonging, for healing, and for a kind of love that is deep, selfless, and unshakable.

BIG IDEA FOR TODAY: A spiritual family knit together by agape love.

A LOVE that transforms families, churches, and communities.

WHAT IS THE PICTURE OR ILLUSTRATION FOR THIS BIG IDEA?

When SVC first began, it wasn’t built on programs or platforms—it was built by family and friends. Not just a biological one, but a spiritual one. A family who believed that the Church should feel like home. A place where people are known, loved, challenged, and celebrated. That’s why family isn’t just a part of what we do here—it’s the heart of who we are.

That vision wasn’t original to us. Jesus modeled it first. When He gathered His disciples, He wasn’t just forming a movement—He was forming a spiritual family. He redefined the word “family” beyond bloodlines and last names. In fact, Jesus once said, “Whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother” (Matthew 12:50).

That wasn’t just a poetic phrase. It was a prophetic picture of what the Church would become: a household of faith(Galatians 6:10), a body made of many members (1 Corinthians 12:12), a spiritual family knit together by agape love.

But let’s be honest—today, many people walk through life carrying wounds from family. Some are lonely. Others are skeptical of church community because of past hurt or shallow relationships.

Yet the cry of the human heart hasn’t changed: We all long to belong. We all long to be loved with a love that doesn’t give up when things get messy.

And that’s exactly the kind of love Jesus calls us into. A love that heals families. A love that binds churches together. A love that spills out into the community. A love that transforms.

Opening Scripture:

John 13:34–35 “34 A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. 35 By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.””

JESUS was forming a new kind of family—a spiritual household knit together by agape love.

Agape love is not simply an emotion but a decisive and sacrificial action, modeled on Jesus' own love for us. By understanding this, RELATIONSHIPS can strive to love each other unconditionally, as Christ loves ALL.

This love is EVIDENCE that we belong to Christ and it is empowered by the Holy Spirit working in us.

Loving Relationships Require:

A Heart Willing to Wear What Christ Wore

Colossians 3:12–14 “12 Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. 14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.”

Dress like Christ to love like Christ

WEAR: Compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, patience, forgiveness

compassion = awareness and sympathy for another’s suffering

kindness = considerate, gentle

humility = without arrogance, modesty

meekness = gentle, event-tempered

patience = endurance of pain

forgiveness = cancel, pardon, show favor

Application: Ask the Holy Spirit each day to help you dress your heart with the qualities of Christ before you engage with others.

Loving Relationships Require:

A Posture of Mutual Submission

Ephesians 5:21 “21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.”

Example of not submitting

Individualism: “I do me, You do you”

Cancel Culture: “If you don’t agree with me, you’re out”

Power Struggle: “If they don’t listen to me, I’m out.”

Marriage: “If this doesn’t work for me, I’m out”

Reject Authority: “No one tells me what to do”

Arrogance: “Everyone needs to hear my opinion”

“submitting”

To those not in the Spirit: Romans 8:7 “7 For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God’s law; indeed, it cannot.”

James 4:7 “7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”

Submissions isn’t losing your voice - it’s choosing to honor others with it (Phil 2:3, 5, 8).

OPTIONAL: “mutual submission” (voluntarily submit) vs. “Ordered relatioship submission” (i.e. wives to husbands, children to parents, servants to masters)

Yielding to GOD’S ways of agape love!

We must make a radical choice between two different ways to live: the Christ-centered life or the self-centered life.

G. Walter Hansen

Healthy relationships are not about dominance but about honoring one another.

Application of honor: 

Listen before speaking

Admitting mistakes

Seeking forgiveness

Serving others (without expectation of return)

Encouraging others

Showing gratitude

Loving Relationships Require:

A Commitment to Togetherness

Hebrews 10:24–25 “24 And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, 25 not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.”

Agape Love grows in presence, not absence

LOVE is expressed through encouragement, presence, stirring up

Application: Prioritize connection— (appropriate) physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Build rhythms of gathering, sharing, and spurring one another on toward love and action.

Conclusion/Reflection:

Strong, Christ-centered relationships aren’t accidental—they’re cultivated…like a garden!

Self-centered love loves the other for the sake of itself; spiritual love loves the other for the sake of Christ.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer (Lutheran Pastor)

Table Etiquette

When we put on the character of Christ, walk in mutual submission, and commit to being together, we create a culture of love that reflects the heart of God.

If someone looked at your relationships, would they see Jesus?

Reflect on your relational dynamics within your family and community, do you embody Christ-like love, which can heal divisions and foster deeper connections.

Assess your own expressions of love within your home, considering how your relationships unveil faith.

Talk It Over

How does the concept of agape love challenge the way we typically think about relationships?

Why is it important to consider love as an action rather than just an emotion in a Christian context?

In what ways can we actively ‘wear’ the attributes of Christ in our daily interactions?

What practical steps can you take this week to demonstrate love to someone in your family or community?