Shame Outline - 2025

Main Point: Jesus can see past our shame

Scripture:

John 4:1–42 ESV

Now when Jesus learned that the Pharisees had heard that Jesus was making and baptizing more disciples than John (although Jesus himself did not baptize, but only his disciples), he left Judea and departed again for Galilee. And he had to pass through Samaria. So he came to a town of Samaria called Sychar, near the field that Jacob had given to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there; so Jesus, wearied as he was from his journey, was sitting beside the well. It was about the sixth hour. A woman from Samaria came to draw water. Jesus said to her, “Give me a drink.” (For his disciples had gone away into the city to buy food.) The Samaritan woman said to him, “How is it that you, a Jew, ask for a drink from me, a woman of Samaria?” (For Jews have no dealings with Samaritans.) Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to you, ‘Give me a drink,’ you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water.” The woman said to him, “Sir, you have nothing to draw water with, and the well is deep. Where do you get that living water? Are you greater than our father Jacob? He gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did his sons and his livestock.” Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water, so that I will not be thirsty or have to come here to draw water.” Jesus said to her, “Go, call your husband, and come here.” The woman answered him, “I have no husband.” Jesus said to her, “You are right in saying, ‘I have no husband’; for you have had five husbands, and the one you now have is not your husband. What you have said is true.” The woman said to him, “Sir, I perceive that you are a prophet. Our fathers worshiped on this mountain, but you say that in Jerusalem is the place where people ought to worship.” Jesus said to her, “Woman, believe me, the hour is coming when neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem will you worship the Father. You worship what you do not know; we worship what we know, for salvation is from the Jews. But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him. God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth.” The woman said to him, “I know that Messiah is coming (he who is called Christ). When he comes, he will tell us all things.” Jesus said to her, “I who speak to you am he.” Just then his disciples came back. They marveled that he was talking with a woman, but no one said, “What do you seek?” or, “Why are you talking with her?” So the woman left her water jar and went away into town and said to the people, “Come, see a man who told me all that I ever did. Can this be the Christ?” They went out of the town and were coming to him. Meanwhile the disciples were urging him, saying, “Rabbi, eat.” But he said to them, “I have food to eat that you do not know about.” So the disciples said to one another, “Has anyone brought him something to eat?” Jesus said to them, “My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to accomplish his work. Do you not say, ‘There are yet four months, then comes the harvest’? Look, I tell you, lift up your eyes, and see that the fields are white for harvest. Already the one who reaps is receiving wages and gathering fruit for eternal life, so that sower and reaper may rejoice together. For here the saying holds true, ‘One sows and another reaps.’ I sent you to reap that for which you did not labor. Others have labored, and you have entered into their labor.” Many Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony, “He told me all that I ever did.” So when the Samaritans came to him, they asked him to stay with them, and he stayed there two days. And many more believed because of his word. They said to the woman, “It is no longer because of what you said that we believe, for we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this is indeed the Savior of the world.”

Formation Questions

Set up/Tension - What questions are we asking?

Does my sin and mistake anger God? Will it keep Him from wanting to have relationship with me?

Does God still love me after what I have done?

Can God forgive someone like me?

Is their redemption for me?

What is wrong with me?

What if they find out?

If they find out would people still accept me?

Why can’t I be like everyone else?

Disruption - Challenge the assumption

I am too far gone. Christ is redeemer

Jesus will never forgive what I have done. Christ Forgives

I will not be accepted. Christ Calls

I have no purpose. Christ Empowers

I am not normal and have a situation that keeps me from doing what others can. Christ is sovereign - Nothing is outside of Christ’s control.

Insight/Revelation - What is God saying?

This woman was an outcast (elaborate) and Christ engages her.

Shame causes us to hide

This woman’s sight was limited to what she knew (seen)

Sometimes we do the same thing and miss out on the miracle in front of us.

This woman had a need that Jesus was willing to meet

Invitation/Response - What will we do about it?

Jesus see’s past our shame - The woman didn’t go looking for Jesus; Jesus went looking for the woman!

Redeemer

Forgiver

He Calls

He Empowers

Jesus knows your need and is willing to meet it

Jesus has a purpose for your life and it’s to bring other to Him

Outline:

Brief introduction of self:

Who I am

How I am proud of the people in the room

Introduction

Scripture:

John 4:1–26 ESV

Now when Jesus learned that the Pharisees had heard that Jesus was making and baptizing more disciples than John (although Jesus himself did not baptize, but only his disciples), he left Judea and departed again for Galilee. And he had to pass through Samaria. So he came to a town of Samaria called Sychar, near the field that Jacob had given to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there; so Jesus, wearied as he was from his journey, was sitting beside the well. It was about the sixth hour. A woman from Samaria came to draw water. Jesus said to her, “Give me a drink.” (For his disciples had gone away into the city to buy food.) The Samaritan woman said to him, “How is it that you, a Jew, ask for a drink from me, a woman of Samaria?” (For Jews have no dealings with Samaritans.) Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to you, ‘Give me a drink,’ you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water.” The woman said to him, “Sir, you have nothing to draw water with, and the well is deep. Where do you get that living water? Are you greater than our father Jacob? He gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did his sons and his livestock.” Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water, so that I will not be thirsty or have to come here to draw water.” Jesus said to her, “Go, call your husband, and come here.” The woman answered him, “I have no husband.” Jesus said to her, “You are right in saying, ‘I have no husband’; for you have had five husbands, and the one you now have is not your husband. What you have said is true.” The woman said to him, “Sir, I perceive that you are a prophet. Our fathers worshiped on this mountain, but you say that in Jerusalem is the place where people ought to worship.” Jesus said to her, “Woman, believe me, the hour is coming when neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem will you worship the Father. You worship what you do not know; we worship what we know, for salvation is from the Jews. But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him. God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth.” The woman said to him, “I know that Messiah is coming (he who is called Christ). When he comes, he will tell us all things.” Jesus said to her, “I who speak to you am he.”

Set up the Tension - What questions are we asking?

Summary/Topic Introduction:

Here we see an amazing story of an encounter between Jesus and a Samaritan woman

Upon initial Inspection this encounter doesn’t seem controversial but truth is it is - socially

She is in shock that a Jew would talk to a Samaritan let alone a woman. - (example to illustrate this scenario)

Interesting observation: She was at the well at noon (THE HEAT OF THE DAY), by herself.… implies she was a social outcast

She would have experienced Shame

This morning I want to talk about Shame

5 husbands:

She had 5 husbands - again upon initial inspection of this truth in our modern context we can miss the significance of this situation

She was a woman in antiquity - she doesn’t have the rights that woman have in our society today

Woman could not initiate divorce only the man could

To have 5 husbands means she was rejected 5 times

Not only was she rejected 5 times it was a disgrace to be married

Jewish and Samaritan tradition disapproved of a woman being married more than 3 times

Not only that the man she was with now wasn’t willing to commit to her in marriage - content with common law marriage

It could be possible he didn’t want to commit in the covenant of marriage with this social outcast...

What the audience feels (they can relate to this woman):

She experienced shame...

Brene Brown definition of shame - “An intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging - it’s something we’ve experienced, done or failed to do that makes us unworthy of connection”

Many of us here are experiencing shame

something we have done

something done to us

Shame really transcends moments and becomes a mindset

Begin as questions -

Does my sin and mistake anger God? Will it keep Him from wanting to have relationship with me?

Does God still love me after what I have done?

Can God forgive someone like me?

Is their redemption for me?

What is wrong with me?

What if they find out?

If they find out would people still accept me?

Why can’t I be like everyone else?

Become reality -

Im too far gone. Too flawed.

Jesus will never forgive me.

I will never forgive me.

I have no purpose.

I will never be accepted.

The Problem/Impact:

Shame causes us to hide

The devil loves those who are in shame because it separates us from God

This isn’t a new tactic. We see it in the Genesis narrative with Adam and Eve

The Samaritan woman was hiding (from social interaction)

Shame also causes us to feel rejected

Disruption - Challenge the assumption

Jesus did not call out her moral blockage to condemn her or to be harsh

If you get anything from this today: JESUS SAW A NEED THAT HE WAS WILLING TO MEET!

THERE IS NOBODY BEYOND THE NEED OF GRACE &

THERE IS NOBODY BEYOND THE REACH OF GRACE

Verse 4 - intentionally added to the scriptures - Jesus needed to meet this Samaritan woman

Jesus was willing to cross over societal barriers to reach her to reach the lost

THE WOMAN WAS NOT SEEKING GOD BUT GOD WAS SEEKING HER!

Invitation/Response - What will we do about it?

Jesus see’s past our sin

Jesus can redeem you

Jesus can forgive you

Jesus has called you and has a purpose on your life

John 4:27–42 ESV

Just then his disciples came back. They marveled that he was talking with a woman, but no one said, “What do you seek?” or, “Why are you talking with her?” So the woman left her water jar and went away into town and said to the people, “Come, see a man who told me all that I ever did. Can this be the Christ?” They went out of the town and were coming to him. Meanwhile the disciples were urging him, saying, “Rabbi, eat.” But he said to them, “I have food to eat that you do not know about.” So the disciples said to one another, “Has anyone brought him something to eat?” Jesus said to them, “My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to accomplish his work. Do you not say, ‘There are yet four months, then comes the harvest’? Look, I tell you, lift up your eyes, and see that the fields are white for harvest. Already the one who reaps is receiving wages and gathering fruit for eternal life, so that sower and reaper may rejoice together. For here the saying holds true, ‘One sows and another reaps.’ I sent you to reap that for which you did not labor. Others have labored, and you have entered into their labor.” Many Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony, “He told me all that I ever did.” So when the Samaritans came to him, they asked him to stay with them, and he stayed there two days. And many more believed because of his word. They said to the woman, “It is no longer because of what you said that we believe, for we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this is indeed the Savior of the world.”