The Downward Slide
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Intro:
Intro:
Good morning.
I hope that everyone is having a great Lord’s day.
I want to say something as we begin about today’s date — June 1st.
A lot of exciting things are coming up in the month of June.
Father’s Day is on the 15th.
The first official day of summer is on June 20th.
Summer camps will be coming up very soon.
There are a lot of good things to look forward to.
Unfortunately, though, the month of June is recognized in our nation and around the world as a celebration of that which God calls perversion.
It was President Bill Clinton who first declared the month of June to be “Gay and Lesbian Pride Month” in the year 1999.
This was after a few decades of LGBT events had been gaining steam, with special emphasis in June to commemorate the “Stonewall Riots” which happened in June of 1969.
So you go from June 1969 to June 1999 (30 years) ... to at first tolerance, then acceptance, then eventually celebration of homosexuality (that which the Bible calls perversion or “vile passions” or a “reprobate”/“debased mind” - Rom. 1:26-28).
But of course it did not stop with the first officially celebrated Pride Month in 1999 — The downward slide continued.
In 2011, President Obama expanded the official Pride Month recognition to include the whole LGBT community (instead of just gays and lesbians).
In June of 2013, the U.S. Supreme Court struck down the Defense of Marriage Act, which had previously banned federal recognition of same-sex marriage.
And then in June of 2015, in the famous Supreme Court ruling Obergefell v. Hodges, gay marriage was legalized in all 50 states as the Court ruled that same-sex couples had the fundamental right to marry on the same terms and conditions as opposite sex-couples.
President Barak Obama famously lit up the White House in Pride Rainbow colors in celebration.
Fast forward to today, and the current stages of the downward slide include:
People claiming they can switch genders any time they please,
People normalizing “polyamory,” which is essentially polygamy (although marriage is often not involved at all),
People acting like animals, claiming to be “furries,” including unmentionable related perversions.
And that’s just the tip of the ice berg.
Statistically speaking, in 2011 nationwide public support for same-sex marriage was at 50% — In 2015, it was at 60% — In 2021, 70%.
The question we have to ask ourselves is — Where did all this start?
And the answer, I would argue, is this — Long before people started accepting “gay marriage,” they started accepting, allowing for, and accommodating another perversion of God’s design for marriage — Divorce.
In Matthew 19:4-6, after the Pharisees tried to trip Jesus up on this subject, Jesus went back to God’s original design for marriage and said …
And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”
17. I want to begin this morning by showing you some crucial dates regarding divorce in our country, and notice how they happened long before “the ball got rolling” for acceptance of LGTBQ issues.
Some Preliminary Thoughts:
Some Preliminary Thoughts:
I do want to say at the beginning that I had 3 people specifically request this topic within the last 6 months or so — I said I would preach on it, and it is my duty to preach on every matter necessary to teach the whole counsel of God (Acts 20:27).
I will also say this — This is not a fun topic (In fact, perhaps my least favorite topic to preach about).
I do not relish in the consequences of these matters.
I don’t believe Jesus relished in or liked the consequences of these matters either.
It must have brought tears to His eyes what man had done with God’s original design for marriage - One man, one woman, joined by God for life.
I also would like to say that I realize in a group this size, there are probably going to be at least a few folks who disagree with what I will be teaching this morning — I understand that.
I ask for your patience and that you carefully consider what the Word of God says.
I invite us to use only the Word of God in discussion of these matters.
Lastly, I want to say that my job is to tell you what the Bible says.
That is the job of a preacher.
I am not an investigator — I do not know details about people’s various situations.
If someone tells me details and comes to me for advice, it is my duty to tell you what the Bible says and give godly counsel accordingly.
But I just want to make sure no one thinks that I’m out to get anyone, or targeting anyone or anything like that.
The reason I am preaching this this morning is 1) it is part of the whole counsel of God and I must preach it, and 2) this topic has been specifically requested recently.
I trust that as I have been here almost 5 years now that everyone knows that I do my best to speak the truth, and to do so with love (Eph. 4:15).
Let’s get to the …
History of Divorce in the United States:
History of Divorce in the United States:
Source - Wikipedia article “History of Divorce in the United States.”
Very early in the Colonial period, divorce was extremely rare in England, requiring special permission from either Parliament or an Ecclesiastical (church) court.
In the American colonies, the New England colonies were less strict:
Between 1692 and 1786, while only 90 divorces were granted in England, 143 divorces were granted in Massachusetts alone.
The Southern Colonies, on the other hand, were much like England and seldom granted divorces.
In 1773, just before the American Revolution started, interestingly, English Parliament ordered American governors to deny approval of any divorce acts passed by Colonial legislatures.
After the war, states joining the union quickly liberalized their divorce laws.
Keep in mind that America in it’s Colonial days was very much a rugged, frontier-like country in comparison to England.
With that, you might expect looser morals in many circumstances.
But also keep in mind that the American Revolution was bookended by two “Great Awakenings,” (religious revivals) — The first in the 1730s and 40s, and the second in the 1790s to 1840s.
The Restoration Movement (going back to the N.T. pattern) was a big part of that Second Great Awakening.
Still, divorce continued to be a problem in America, and by the mid-1800s, Americans obtained more divorces annually than were granted in all of Europe.
By 1890, 3 couples out of every 1000 were divorced, rising to 8 out of 1000 couples by 1920 (astonishing at the time, but in actuality less than 1% of couples).
The feminist movement of the turn of the 20th century furiously debated whether or not they should add acceptance of divorce to their platform — There were strong advocates for each side, but eventually the ones in favor of divorce won out.
20th Century:
“Prior to the latter decades of the 20th century, divorce was considered to be against the public interest, and civil courts refused to grant a divorce except if one party to the marriage had betrayed the ‘innocent spouse.’”
(As we are going to see, this lines up with what Jesus commanded).
“If an ‘innocent’ husband and wife wished to separate, or if both were guilty, ‘neither would be allowed to escape the bonds of marriage.’"
Pretty strict wasn’t it? So what changed?
Well, the general morality of the nation changed.
1909 - Reno Nevada became known as “the divorce capital of the world.”
Just the history of divorce in the state of Nevada is pretty eye-opening and appalling.
For instance, in 1927, the state of Nevada felt like it was being outdone by lax divorce laws in France and Mexico, so the legislature scrambled to keep up in order that Nevada could maintain its divorce supremacy.
In the same 1931 Nevada state legislature that voted in favor of “wide-open gambling,” they also included a provision lowering state residency requirements for divorce to just 6 weeks.
You can’t make this up, but shortly after this was enacted, Reno, Nevada had “divorce ranches” start popping up, where people could come and live in Nevada for 6 weeks so they could obtain an easy divorce.
Why bring all this up? Because we are talking about a downward spiral of morality this morning, and it’s all related.
In 1942, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that states had to recognize other states’ divorces.
Back up to 1916 for a moment — By this time, the United States led the world in number of divorces.
In the 1960s, the National Association of Women Lawyers convinced the American Bar Association to create a Family Law section in many state courts, and pushed strongly for no-fault divorce law around 1960.
It took a while, but eventually in 1969, California became the first state to pass a no-fault divorce law.
… Oddly enough, signed by then Governor Ronald Reagan.
Not surprisingly, divorce rates sky-rocketed in the decades since.
Again, why bring all this up? Because we are talking about a downward spiral of morality this morning.
What Did Jesus Say About Divorce?
What Did Jesus Say About Divorce?
Before we get there, what did the prophet Malachi say about divorce?
“For the Lord God of Israel says That He hates divorce, For it covers one’s garment with violence,” Says the Lord of hosts. Therefore take heed to your spirit, That you do not deal treacherously.”
You have wearied the Lord with your words; “Yet you say, “In what way have we wearied Him?” In that you say, “Everyone who does evil Is good in the sight of the Lord, And He delights in them,” Or, “Where is the God of justice?”
2. Where IS the God of Justice?
The people of Malachi’s day asked that in a mocking way.
And sometimes people today will try to pit God’s mercy against His justice, and His justice against His mercy … But the fact is that God is both just AND merciful, and He tells us about when He will punish and when He will be merciful in His Word.
You can find a perfect example of the balance of God’s mercy and justice in Psalm 101.
Psalm 101:1 begins: “I will sing of mercy and justice; To You, O Lord, I will sing praises.”
The rest of that Psalm tells us that David made up his mind to walk perfectly (or completely) with God with a perfect heart, and he decries wickedness, perversion, slander, haughtiness and pride, deceit, and falling away.
He holds up the faithful, and says that the wicked will be destroyed.
This is perhaps the most concise example in Scripture showing who will receive God’s mercy, and who will receive His just wrath.
3. Well, what did Jesus say about our subject this morning?
4. There are 4 main passages in the Gospel accounts when Jesus addresses the issue of divorce:
Mark 10:1-12
Luke 16:18
Matt. 5:31-32
And Matt. 19:3-12
5. I have a chart for each of these that I’d like to point out - Each one of these passages has something to add to the discussion about divorce — Not only divorce, but subsequent remarriage as well.
Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” In the house His disciples also asked Him again about the same matter.
So He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”
6. This is the general law of marriage - God says do not let man separate what He joined - God says if a divorce takes place, a man commits adultery against his wife if he marries another.
This law applies equally to both the man and the woman.
“Whoever divorces his wife ...”
“And if a woman divorces her husband ...”
“Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced from her husband commits adultery.
Notice, this adds that if someone marries the put away person, that he is committing adultery as well.
Adultery is a two-person sin.
Adultery is unlawful intercourse.
Hebrews 13:4 talks about acceptable intercourse - “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.”
Notice also that this is a salvation issue, isn’t it? “Fornicators and adulterers God will judge.”
Again, God’s mercy is not going to overrule His justice. His justice will not overrule His mercy either — God is going to perfectly balance that out … and He has already told us in His Word to whom He will be merciful and whom He will punish.
“Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’
But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.
This is in the midst of Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount.
I want to bring in here an important side point:
Sometimes in looking at what Jesus says about this subject, people will say - “Well, Jesus said that before He died and rose again, ascended into heaven, and before the church started, so it doesn’t apply today.”
Lovingly, let me say that to say such is a misapplication of the distinction between the Old Covenant and the New.
First, are we really going to throw out everything that Jesus ever said? Because to be consistent, that would be necessary.
Clearly, the things that Jesus taught as doctrine were taught by the apostles, and Christians continued to teach the same doctrine (Acts 2:42 - “And they continued steadfastly in the apostles’ doctrine and fellowship, in the breaking of bread, and in prayers.”).
Secondly, the Luke passage that we have already seen (Luke 16:18) — A couple verses before that, Jesus says in Luke 16:16 - “The law and the prophets were until John (the Baptist). Since that time the kingdom of God (the church) has been preached, and everyone is pressing into it.”
The life of Christ was a transition period - Yes, the New Covenant didn’t fully come into effect until after Jesus’ death (Heb. 9:16-17), but the things Jesus (and John the Baptist) taught were preparing the way for the Kingdom, and absolutely still apply today.
Well, what does Matt. 5:32 introduce to our discussion?
It introduces the only God-approved exception - fornication.
The NKJV says sexual immorality - The KJV is more precise and correctly translated as “fornication.”
The Greek word is porneia, which means unlawful sexual intercourse.
Sexual intercourse that goes against God’s moral law — Perversion away from acceptable intercourse (Heb. 13:7).
Jesus reiterates this only exception again in Matthew 19:3-12:
The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?”
What were these Pharisees doing?
They were trying to pit Jesus against two famous rabbi’s of the time — Shammai & Hillel:
(I have this in a handout for you).
Shammai taught the only acceptable reason for divorce was “uncleanness” (sexual sin).
Hillel was much more loose on this subject.
They based their arguments on Deut. 24:1ff.
(Go with me and let’s read Deut. 24:1-4 quickly, and there are a few comments I want to make — I have these written on your handout as well).
And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?
So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”
Notice, very importantly, that Jesus does not go back to Moses as His authority for marriage, divorce, and remarriage — He goes back before that to the authority of God who designed marriage “at the beginning.”
I cannot overstate how important this is — God’s law for marriage is the same that it has been since the beginning — One man, one woman joined by God for life.
God’s original intent for marriage is the same - Patriarchal Law, Law of Moses, Law of Christ.
Deuteronomy 24 - Moses did not command divorce (like the Pharisees are about to say in a moment) — He put up with it.
He allowed it, he permitted it.
But from the beginning it was not so.
Acts 17:30 - “Truly, these times of ignorance God overlooked, but now commands all men everywhere to repent.”
God’s law for marriage has not changed - God’s law for marriage is extremely strict — There’s a reason for that:
Marriage is a holy institution.
It is undefiled (Heb. 13:4).
Adultery defiles marriage.
They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?” He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.
And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”
If someone divorces his wife for the wrong reason (any reason other than fornication) and then marries another, Jesus says that he commits adultery.
Whoever who marries the one who was divorced also commits adultery.
Notice, “commits” is continuous action — It’s something you continue to do, grammatically speaking.
Thus, the simplest way I know how to counsel someone when a marriage is in question — (Is this Scriptural?) — Is to ask the question: What was the reason for the divorce?
Someone says, “Well, yes, I agree divorce is bad. I agree God hates it. But if they’ve already messed up, surely they can still remain in whatever situation they are in and be saved.”
Can a polygamist remain an unrepentant polygamist and be saved?
Can a murderer remain an unrepentant murderer and be saved?
Can a homosexual, a sodomite, an idolater, or a drunkard remain unrepentant in any one of those things and be saved?
Brethren, lovingly but truthfully, we already know the answer to those questions.
1 Corinthians 6:9–11 - “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.”
Galatians 5:19–21 - “Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.”
One may not remain in unrepentant adultery and inherit the kingdom of God.
This is a hard saying. I don’t enjoy it. I have tears in my eyes every time this comes up, especially when it comes up and there are tremendous consequences that come up in the lives of people I know and work with.
Perhaps Jesus very well may have had tears in HIS eyes when He taught this.
… But He didn’t shy away from teaching people the truth on it.
It was a hard saying, that’s why we read now …
His disciples said to Him, “If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” But He said to them, “All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given:
For there are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother’s womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. He who is able to accept it, let him accept it.”
Jesus is clearly saying that there were going to be some who had to force themselves to remain celibate for the kingdom of heaven’s sake.
Context — There are some who, in order to avoid adultery, have to force themselves to be celibate.
Is there Biblical precedence for people having to leave unscriptural marriages in the Bible?
Yes.
And among the sons of the priests who had taken pagan wives the following were found of the sons of Jeshua the son of Jozadak, and his brothers: Maaseiah, Eliezer, Jarib, and Gedaliah. And they gave their promise that they would put away their wives; and being guilty, they presented a ram of the flock as their trespass offering.
All these had taken pagan wives, and some of them had wives by whom they had children.
b. Someone says, “That’s Old Testament.”
c. Let me remind you that God’s law for marriage goes back to the beginning, and Romans 15:4 tells us the Old Testament was written for our learning.
d. We can and must learn from this example.
4. Someone says, “Okay, I see it. God really hates divorce. Somebody really can get himself into an unscriptural marriage, but baptism will just wash all that away.”
5. What did we study last Sunday night about in the plan of salvation?
“Repent and be baptized” (Acts 2:38).
“Repent and be converted” (Acts 3:19).
Repentance is prerequisite before someone can obey the Gospel.
Can I study with a thief, and the thief says, “I want to be baptized” — “Well, that’s great!” “Are you sorry for your thievery? Are you going to give back what you stole?” — “No way! I’m not giving anything back. In fact, I plan on continuing to steal tomorrow.”
6. I can’t Scripturally baptize that person — He hasn’t repented. (If I baptize him, he’s just getting wet).
The Bible says, “Let him who stole steal no more” (Eph. 4:28).
What about someone who stole another man’s wife? … … …
Can a person remain an unrepentant murderer, drunkard, idolater, fornicator, covetous person, or homosexual, be baptized, and then continue in those same things like it is no problem?
We know better than that — And again, 1 Cor. 6:11 says “such WERE some of you” — They had to repent of those things to be saved.
Conclusion:
Conclusion:
I realize that what we have studied today is a heavy subject — In fact, in my opinion, it may be THE heaviest subject in all of Scripture.
It is HARD - It is not fun — I don’t enjoy it at all — I shed tears when this comes up, and someone decides what Jesus said about this is just too much for them to bear, so they go away sorrowful.
… But we have to teach the truth on this.
John the Baptist was unafraid to teach the truth on it — You know what he told Herod?
“It is unlawful for you to have (continuous action) your brother’s wife” (Mark 6:18).
What did that cost John the Baptist?
… His head.
He was put to death because he taught the truth on marriage and divorce.
Why couldn’t he have just said, “Well, Herod, you did wrong in marrying your brother’s wife, but it will be okay — Just let me baptize you and you can remain married to her?”
John was baptizing a baptism of repentance for the remission of sins (Mark 1:4).
Why couldn’t he have just baptized him?
Because in order to really be saved, Herod would have had to repent of that unlawful (unscriptural) marriage.
Romans 7:1-3 - I’ll finish with these verses this morning.
Or do you not know, brethren (for I speak to those who know the law), that the law has dominion over a man as long as he lives?
For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband.
So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man.
6. The things that Jesus taught on marriage, divorce, and remarriage are very clear.
7. I realize that sometimes people bring up various “what ifs” and what not, and admittedly, there are times when my honest response is: “I don’t know” or “I’m not sure.”
8. But I do know if we just go with what Jesus said, we can’t go wrong.
9. I also know that sometimes it is better to be safe than sorry.
10. And I will also say this, for every one or two cases where we might think, “Hmm, I’m not sure,” there are likely 10 or 12 or more where the facts are very clear and cut and dry based on the teachings of Jesus.
11. I pray that we handle this subject with care and concern, with love, and with diligence to make sure our lives are in keeping with the will of God.
12. (Give invitation).
