The Holy Home: Submissive and Saved Children

Questions

Intro:

All sermons are intended to instruct you like the adults here! All the worshipful singing is also

You are important to Jesus. He tells us in the gospel of Matthew:

Review:

All is under the heading of living for the glory of Christ.

Ephesians 5:17–18 “17 So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. 18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit,”

All of these commands require a heart change and they speak of the purpose of every person on this earth. God desires all people to flee foolishness, seek the wisdom of the Lord and he filled by or controlled by his Spirit within you. Because of sin which separates us from God, this heart change comes when a person understands they are a sinner who disobeys the Lord everyday, who cannot live in heaven with Jesus because their heart desires to sin, and therefore Jesus must change their heart into one that desires to live for him as Lord of their lives.

When Paul writes the Ephesian church about how to live in the world as people who love Jesus, he includes how husbands and wives should love Jesus together and now how kids and their parents should love Jesus in their homes.

Paul takes the first verses of Eph 6 to talk to kids about how Jesus wants you to love him and how to love your parents.

Problem:

Loving your parents is hard sometimes. Let me explain why that is. Sin causes all of us to want what we think think is best. Sometimes we think having two bowls of ice cream before bed is best for us. Sounds yummy right. Parents know that all that sugar in ice cream leads to alot more than just a great taste in our mouths. They know that sugar can make your stomach ache, your sleep to be challenging and its just generally unhealthy. Again, you think the ice cream makes everything better, but your parents actually are looking out for your health and your good. When you ask for that ice cream and they say “no” you might struggle to love them after that in obedience and with kindness. You might say mean words or think mean thoughts. This is sin because in your heart, you want to do what you think is best.

What the Bible teaches us here in Eph 6 is a way to understand what God has planned for our lives that is best. We should always turn away from what WE THINK IS BEST and instead, think about WHAT GOD SAYS IS BEST FOR US. In Eph 6, God shows us what is best for all children in the world-he gave them parents.

2 DISCLAIMERS:

Parents are not perfect!

All parents make mistakes and sin just like all of us. They are no different except when they love Jesus. Parents who love Jesus can get the help of Jesus to change their hearts. When Jesus changes their hearts, they will be better parents because they will follow God’s instructions on how to lead their families and care for this kids. If you understand that your parents make mistakes, then you can understand that God forgives them just like he forgives you, if you trust in Jesus.

Some parents are bad parents!

Some parents are bad parents because they don’t love Jesus, they only love themselves. Because sin has corrupted our world, some parents that do not love Jesus will be bad at being parents because they love themselves too much. I hope that does not describe your parents. I know kids who their parents care more about feeding themselves than providing food for their own kids. Sounds crazy right.

When I was teaching Mila and Peter about taking care of our dogs, I taught them to feed the dogs before they ate breakfast. I wanted them to see that taking care of the dogs was a responsibility they were given and it should come first before they worried about themselves. Of course, it is fine if they ate breakfast first, but what might mistake might happen if they eat first? They might forget to feed the dogs and go about their day activities and the dogs will be hungry.

Some parents, who don’t love Jesus have never had their heart changed to think of others more before themselves. Knowing this truth doesn’t make it easier to live with, but at least you know why your parents might act in certain ways. If this is true in your family, I am sorry and we can pray together that Jesus will change your parents heart to love Him and be the parent who cares for their kids like Jesus wants them to.

Romans 8:28 “28 And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”

God can even use bad circumstances to bring about good things in our lives. If you have parents that don’t love Jesus, God can still work for your good and theirs, even in the midst of evil.

Now, let’s look at what the Bible about how you can love your parents.

1. Think About the Lord’s Plan (6:1)

Ephesians 6:1 “1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.”

Explanation:

Two words here that you need to focus on in v 1, children and parents. Theses are titles and descriptions of the authority of the family. In God’s plan, parents are placed by God in the home as the leaders or authority over the children. It the design of the family that God intended from the beginning. God created Adam and Eve and from Adam and Eve came Cain and Abel. In this design of the Family, God is showing children that He has placed their parents over them to care for and lead them to love God and serve Him.

Illustration

When we think about placement, I want you think about legos. When we build legos, each piece has a certain place that it goes so that whatever you are building is built correctly. When a piece is out of place, the build does not fit together properly. If you start putting pieces wherever you want instead of how the plans of the lego build instruct you, then you fail to build the piece the way it is intended. All of the sudden, your LEGO race car might look like a weird fish of something.

God placed your parents over you as your leaders and authority for a few reasons. They are older, wiser, stronger, and taller than you. This is why they drive a car and you don’t. This is the way God designed it and it is for your protection and good.

When Paul tells us, Children OBEY YOUR PARENTS, he is showing us that parents are in charge of children as the authority and children should respond to what is said with obedience.

Obedience

What is obedience? It is doing what our parents ask us to do. “Pick up your toys, eat your food, fold your clothes, don’t cross the street with an adult.” All of these things parents might say to kids. The response is for children to do what their parents say.

Why Obey?

God wants you to understand that obeying your parents is not so much about you and them as much it is about you and Him. Obedience to your parents is about loving God and doing what he said. Obedience is recognizing what God has planned in your life. Do you love God and all that He has done for you and given you? Are you thankful for the life he has given you, the food he provides, the backyard to play in, the amazing animals to see? Are you thankful he gave you parents to love you and take care of you?

Obedience to your parents is about loving God. This is why Paul says “children obey your parents in the Lord” because the Lord Jesus designed your life and he placed your parents in your life to take care of you. If you love him and if you are thankful for Him, then his is why you obey your parents.

One of my favorite preachers John Macarthur says that there are 3 things that stand in the way of obedince in children:

The curse of sin

The Bible tells us that “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” (Ro 3:23) and No one is righteous, no not one. There is no one who seeks God all have turned away. (Ro 3:10). This means that every person born in this world is born with a heart that wants to sin and rebel against God. As your families teach you about Jesus, they do so so you can understand that Jesus came to live a perfect obedient life because he was God in the flesh. He obeyed because you and all will always fail at obeying perfectly. Then He died on the cross to pay the punishment for sin that demands death. Instead of us paying the fine for our sin, Jesus paid it for us. Lastly, he rose from the dead on the third day to defeat sin and death. This victory of his resurrection allows us to be free to obey God and our parents.

If you know that sin dwells within you, then you understand that only trusting in Jesus for your salvation will bring you a changed heart that longs to love God and obey his commandments.

The cursed world You need to understand that the world around you is working against you and your relationship with God. There is an unseen realm, spiritual things we cannot see, where Satan is influencing this world to lead you and keep you away from God. This means that TV, movies, music, friends, school all can be really evil obstacles to keep you from loving and obeying Jesus.

Psalm 1:1 “1 How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, Nor stand in the path of sinners, Nor sit in the seat of scoffers!”

Their childishness

Lastly, you will find it hard to obey because you are a kid. As a child, you are still learning how to listen, how to focus, how to solve problems, how to follow directions. It gets better and better the older you get. As parents, we need to remember just how important this point. This requires parents to be patient with you as you grow. Jesus, perfect in obedience

Hebrews 4:15 “For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things as we are, yet without sin.”

Let’s look a few different ways children should obey their parents:

A. With our ears:

Proverbs 23:22 “22 Listen to your father who begot you, And do not despise your mother when she is old.”

Proverbs 1:8 “8 Hear, my son, your father’s instruction And do not forsake your mother’s teaching;”

We can obey our parents only when we listen to their words and instruction. Our sinful hearts lead us to want to ignore what our parents say. Sin leads us to think we are smarter than our parents. God has placed our parents in our lives because they have grown over the years in knowledge and understanding. This wisdom that God has given them actually helps to protect you. If you listen, you will be able to obey.

B. With our eyes:

Proverbs 30:17 “17 (things that will not be satisfied…The eye that mocks a father And scorns a mother”

There is an old saying which states, “our eyes tell the whole story.” What is in our heart is often communicated with our eyes. We can roll our eyes when we don’t want to do what they say or disagree with what they are saying. Our eyes can communicate disobedience even if our hands are obeying. Obeying our parents means that we follow what they tell us without unloving eyes. This is still showing a heart of disobedience. Listening with our ears and submitting with our eyes will lead to godly obedience.

C. With our mouths:

Exodus 21:17 “17 “He who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death.”

Obedience is showing love towards our parents with words. Cursing them is speaking evil or wishing evil to come upon them. God desires for children to speak kindness and love from their mouths to the parents He has given them

these are just a few examples for us to consider:

2. Think about Your Parents (6:2)

Ephesians 6:2 “2 Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise),”

Explanation

In v 2, Paul takes us back to the OT to consider the 10 commandments. He quotes from Exodus 20:10 and draws us back to what God told Israel. Instead of saying Chidren Obey, he says “honor your mother and father.” So in our first point he talked about the position of your parents being your authority. Obeying them is showing love to the Lord. The word “honor” used in v 2 is a little different because it focuses on showing respect to your parents for who they are in your life. They love you, sacrifice for you, feed you, clean up your dirty clothes, care for you when you are sick. So honoring them is showing love to them in return and it INCLUDES obedience.

If President Trump came to your house to visit, what would you do? You would clean up your room, make sure the house was tidy, wear something really nice, invite your friends. When he got out of his armored vehicle, you would stand, shake his hand when he extended his. You would use good manners and say, Nice to meet you Mr President. You wouldn’t say, “whats up donny!” Nice wheels.

Now consider how you honor your parents. Do you treat them with that kind of respect. The president doesn’t even know your name. He doesn’t know what you are afraid of, what kind of foods you are allergic to, what your favorite cereal is at the grocery store. Your parents do and they show love to you throughout your lives. We honor them because the Lord made them your parents, they should be treated with respect for the responsibility they have over you.

This honor that you give them is a matter of the heart. It is built on your love for them and your love for God. I want to give you one of the best examples of a son honoring his mother in the Bible. Jesus was hanging on the cross, he was dying from not being able to breath, from losing blood from his wounds. He looks down from up on the cross, and his mom Mary is there. Also, the disciple John is next to her. Jesus tells his mother to now look to John as her son and for John to now look to Mary as his mother. What Jesus was doing as a son was honoring his mother and making sure she was cared for after his death and resurrection. This passage in John 19 tells us that afterwards, Mary went into John’s household to be cared for him.

This is how you honor your parents.

3. Think about the Lord’s Promise (6:3)

Ephesians 6:3 “3 so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth.”

Explanation

Now lastly, look to the promise that Paul gives you here. He says that with obedience and honoring your parents, this leads to a blessed life. He tells us that your life with be blessed and it will be long. He is not saying that bad things will never happen to you. You will experience difficulty in this life. Its a guarantee. but the promise here is that God is working good in your life and you will expereince the blessings of that goodness in relationship to your obedience.

For example, I was a disobedient kid and my rebellion had consequences that brought about difficulty for me. I struggled to have a good relationship with my dad for many years because I was disobedient and unruly. If I would have understood these verses and followed them, I would have expereinced a very different life. God blesses obedience, but let me say it must be from a heart that loves the Lord and all He has done.

If you obey but have a bad attitude about it…its actually not obedience. Remember to our first point that we show we love Jesus by obedience to Him and them.

Notice the second part of this promise…”that you will live lone on the earth.” This does not mean that eeryone who obeys their parents will live to 100 years old. As a matter of fact, it doesn’t even say an age. Instead, it is saying that our lives will be blessed by honoring our parents and obeying their wisdom and instruction. This will be for your good.

Proverbs 1:8–19 “8 Hear, my son, your father’s instruction And do not forsake your mother’s teaching; 9 Indeed, they are a graceful wreath to your head And ornaments about your neck. 10 My son, if sinners entice you, Do not consent. 11 If they say, “Come with us, Let us lie in wait for blood, Let us ambush the innocent without cause; 12 Let us swallow them alive like Sheol, Even whole, as those who go down to the pit; 13 We will find all kinds of precious wealth, We will fill our houses with spoil; 14 Throw in your lot with us, We shall all have one purse,” 15 My son, do not walk in the way with them. Keep your feet from their path, 16 For their feet run to evil And they hasten to shed blood. 17 Indeed, it is useless to spread the baited net In the sight of any bird; 18 But they lie in wait for their own blood; They ambush their own lives. 19 So are the ways of everyone who gains by violence; It takes away the life of its possessors.”

Now notice from these verses the influence of friends trying to lure children into sin. Now Solomon says at the beginning for children to listen to their parents. Why? Because parents warn their kids about these influences. If you listen to them, you avoid the evil of friends like these. If you ignore them, Solomon says that their evil could be so bad it leads to your death. Obeying the wisdom of your parents leads to a longer life because wisdom and truth are for your good phsyical and spiritual health.

Before we conclude: let me wrap this up with all of Adults and kids. We will always have parents on this earth or the memory of them. We have been called to honor them, even as adults, for the sake of the goodness in our live and the glory of God. Independence from your parents never negates our responsibility before God to honor them in this life or honor them in their death.

Let’s review:

Obeying your parents is right because God has planned this for your life. Obey them to show love to Him

Honoring your parents is showing respect to those who care and love you. Doing so is for your good and it will lead to blessing throughout your days.

End with gospel: The greatest desire your parents have in this life is for their children to trust in Jesus for the frogiveness of sins.