All day every day

Ephesians 5:21–6:9

Question: Have you ever done something you regret? wouldn’t it have been nice to know beforehand how much you would regret the outcome before you did it?

“God uses our most normal, day-to-day relationships to do two things: One, to teach us about Himself and to make us like Himself. and second is to put his character on display for a watching world”

Ephesians 5:21–6:9 ESV

21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. 22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. 1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” 4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. 5 Bondservants, obey your earthly masters with fear and trembling, with a sincere heart, as you would Christ, 6 not by the way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but as bondservants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart, 7 rendering service with a good will as to the Lord and not to man, 8 knowing that whatever good anyone does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether he is a bondservant or is free. 9 Masters, do the same to them, and stop your threatening, knowing that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and that there is no partiality with him.

Submit Ephesians 5:21 “21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.”

3 types of submitting: God’s way (Perfect), the christian way (imperfect but working on it) and the worlds way (Garbage).

Biblical submission—especially within the context of marriage and the church—is voluntary, God-honoring, and rooted in the gospel, not as something oppressive or demeaning.

1. Submission is about order, not value

Submission does not imply inferiority. Men and women are equal in worth and dignity, but different in roles, particularly in the home and church. Complementarian theology (men and women complement one another with distinct roles).

“Submission is not about lesser value; it’s about a willingness to follow God’s design for order and flourishing.” – Chandler

2. Submission is willing, not forced

Biblical submission must be voluntary, never coerced. A wife submitting to her husband (Ephesians 5:22–24) is an act of faith in God, not blind obedience to a man.

“If a husband demands submission, he’s already failed to lead like Christ.”

3. Submission is Christ-centered

All submission (in marriage, church, or society) should mirror the relationship between Christ and the Church. It's about trusting Jesus and aligning your life with the gospel, not about power dynamics.

Wives and Husbands Ephesians 5:22-33

Ephesians 5:22–33 ESV

22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

How does marriage teach us about God’s love

A taste of God’s beauty

I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else." — C.S. Lewis, Is Theology Poetry? (from The Weight of Glory)

This metaphor compares Christianity to the sun—not just something you see, but something by which you see everything else. It's one of Lewis's most famous and profound reflections on faith.

2. A picture of God’s image. Unity in plurality.

a. Different yet complimenting roles

b. Genesis: Men provide 2. Lead spiritually 3. Lead in romance 4. lead in sacrifice. Wives = Submission (Not inferiority or dominance) All under God’s leadership.

3. A picture of God’s grace (when you marry someone you see a lot of their flaws) Marriage should be gospel reenactment. Marriage is not supposed to be about the spouse making you happy but sacrificing for the other.

Kids and Parents Ephesians 6:1-4

Ephesians 6:1–4 ESV

1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” 4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Children learn to obey God by obeying their parents.

Our parents represent the authority of God to us.

Slaves and Masters (Employee and Boss) Ephesians 6:5-9

Ephesians 6:5–9 ESV

5 Bondservants, obey your earthly masters with fear and trembling, with a sincere heart, as you would Christ, 6 not by the way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but as bondservants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart, 7 rendering service with a good will as to the Lord and not to man, 8 knowing that whatever good anyone does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether he is a bondservant or is free. 9 Masters, do the same to them, and stop your threatening, knowing that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and that there is no partiality with him.

Our first audience in any assignment is God

So What?

How are you submitting? How are you living out the gospel in the life God has given you?

This takes time.

The saying I stole from Matt Chandler a long time ago is: Deep work, over time, in community.