Honoring Your Father

Now, as you guys are well aware, I am not usually very good at preparing sermons for special days like Father’s Day and Mother’s Day, and I think part of the reason is that I miss my mom and dad so much. I am telling you that if you have your parents still with you that you need to cherish every minute with them because things change greatly when they are no longer around.

My mom always made me feel so special, and my dad was always my dad. He would work all day, come home, and play catch until I got tired. He was at every basketball game except for one. He was at every baseball game. He was at every special occasion. He was there to discipline me, and most importantly, he taught me about Jesus, and how a father is to love, support, and provide for his family.

Man, I miss him so much, and in heaven, if he ever casts an eye my way, I hope he thinks his time with me was well spent.

Dear friend, society, today, needs fathers like I had. Society does not need “baby-daddy.” Society needs men who embrace and fulfill God’s ordained role of fatherhood in a traditional home.

Charlie Halliburton and I had an interesting conversation about commitment. This is what he said. Throughout the SBC, studies are showing how each generation defines commitment differently, and I believe that to be true, but it does not matter how you define commitment, and it does not matter how I define commitment. What matters is how God defines commitment.

God reserves fatherhood and motherhood for those who are bound together through marriage, and by the way, marriage is to be between a man and a woman, and that is all I have to say about that.

Our passage this morning is going to be from the Book of Ephesians, and here it is.

Ephesians 6:1–4 “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

“Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”

And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.”

Let me just say this, and I do not know if this is theologically correct, but it is according to Doct. Clendenin.

Honoring your father and mother is a lifelong commandment and obligation.

That commandment does not have an expiration date. Even if our parents are dead, we should honor them in the way that we live. If your parents are or were Christians, you are to honor them in the way that you live. There you go. I said it.

Now, I know in our society that we lave many broken homes so the person or persons who raised you may not be your biological parents, but you can honor the ones who stepped up and filled that role for you.

My sermon outline just has two points this morning. We are going to look at the father’s responsibility to his children, and the children’s responsibility to their father.

1. The father’s responsibilities to his children.

Let me begin by stating the obvious.

A father is to provide financially for the home, and the father is to lead the home setting the standard for love and setting the expectations for the family. The father in the home is the one who needs to make the same declaration Joshua made which is:

“As for me and my house, we are going to serve the Lord.”

As a man if you do not want to provide financially for your children, do not have them, and that is all I am going to say about that too.

A. Training the child properly.

Ephesians 6:4 “And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.”

Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.”

A father’s main responsibility to his children is to train them in the ways of the Lord and to discipline them properly.

The father is the one in the home who establishes the expectation of Bible study in that home. One of the things I admire about Lauren and Shayne, and I am sure others do it too, is that each night they have a time of Bible study and prayer with Joey-Mac. That is setting the expectation now.

In all that a father does, he must take the time to lead the home spiritually, and do not say you do not have time if you have the time to your child how to fish, hunt, play baseball, play golf, play Fortnite, or search social media. If you have time to do those things but not to lead your home spiritually, your priorities are wrong, and more than likely, eventually, the priority you established for your child will show up in his or her life.

B. Loving the child unconditionally.

We are going to talk about discipline under this heading, but you must always remember this when disciplining your children.

Your child did not ask to be born. That child is your child, and you are to love him or her unconditionally.

The type of love you are to have for your children is called storge in the Greek.

It is a deep, unconditional, and sacrificial love. It is the type of love found in a very familiar Parable in the Bible. (Luke 15:20-24).

Luke 15:20–24 ““And he arose and came to his father. But when he was still a great way off, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran and fell on his neck and kissed him.

And the son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and in your sight, and am no longer worthy to be called your son.’ “But the father said to his servants, ‘Bring out the best robe and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand and sandals on his feet.

And bring the fatted calf here and kill it, and let us eat and be merry; for this my son was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ And they began to be merry.”

Your child is your child, and even though, he or she can make you want to scream, he or she is still your child and you have an obligation to them.

Many parents have been where the father of the Prodigal Son was, and just like him, we do what? We welcome our child home.

Now, if we raise and train our children in the Lord, they will not stay in the pigpen; they will return home. How we discipline our children plays a role in that. In Ephesians, Paul says that fathers are not to provoke their children to wrath. That is speaking directly about discipline.

As the head of the home, the father has to set parameters or boundaries in the home, and when that child crosses those parameters, that child needs to be disciplined.

Proverbs 23:13–14 “Do not withhold correction from a child, For if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. You shall beat him with a rod, And deliver his soul from hell.”

This verse is not talking about abusing your children, but it is talking about disciplining them, and the way it reads tells me that properly disciplining a child will play a role in the child’s salvation. Is that how you read the passage?

We are to discipline out of love just as God disciplines us out of love.

Hebrews 12:6 “For whom the Lord loves He chastens, And scourges every son whom He receives.””

2. The child’s responsibilities to his or her father.

A. Children are to obey their parents.

Ephesians 6:1 “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.”

Kiddos, you are to obey your parents.

If your parents say, “You are not going out with that boy.” That is the end of the story. If your parents say, “No electronic devices.” That is the end of the story. If your parents say, “As four our family, we are going to church.” That is the end of the story, and parents when you say something, mean it, and do not put up with a pouting child because that is where the discipline comes in. If you set the expectation, demand that your child honors your expectations.

In other words, do not let junior pout until he has his way. That is the absolute worst thing we can do when we raising children. When we say no, they need to understand that no means no.

Nothing, and I mean nothing, looks worse that a child who pouts and throws a fit until that child gets what he or she wants, and when I see it, I always blame the parents for allowing it because when that behavior starts, that is when the board of education needs to applied to the seat of knowledge if you catch my drift.

Children, you are to obey your parents. Now, let me say something else about this that should not even have to be said, but in our society, I am compelled to say it.

We live in a society, unfortunately, where it becomes necessary for children to be disobedient to their parents.

What am I talking about?

A child is not expected to be obedient to the sexual advances of parents, and the thought of adults doing that to children really tests the redness of my neck if you catch my drift.

A child is not expected to be obedient to parental abuse and neglect. That child needs an outlet to report that kind of stuff.

BTW, the Bible condemns the abuse of children very sternly.

Colossians 3:21 “Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”

Proverbs 29:22 “An angry man stirs up strife, And a furious man abounds in transgression.”

Listen to me friend. There is no place in the home or in society for uncontrolled anger in the life of a Christian. Anger should be confessed as the sin it is.

Matthew 18:6 ““Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to sin, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were drowned in the depth of the sea.”

That’s all I am going to say about that too except to say this.

There are even homes in this country where the parents are against God that they do not want their children to know anything about God. In those situations, dear friend, we are to pray those children get the gospel presented unto them because it is the gospel that is the power of God unto salvation.

B. Children are to honor their parents.

Ephesians 6:2–3 ““Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.””

Obeying your parents and honoring your parents are two different commandments.

Honoring our parents comes with a promise. If we honor our parents, and I am not reading anything into it, we will have a long life.

Linda must have really honored her parents.

The Bible says that if we honor our parents we will live long and well. Now, some of you might be thinking this.

“Well, I know this person who died young, and he seemed to honor his or parents greatly.”

Living well and long does not necessarily equate to a number of years. There are accidents that happen all the time that are the result of living in sinful world. If a person dies in an accident, that does not mean they did not live well. If you live for Christ, you can die at 20 and still will have lived well.

Living well does not mean you will have all the wealth in the world. I believe living well refers to this passage found in the Bible.

Philippians 4:5–9 “Let your gentleness be known to all men. The Lord is at hand. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God;

and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report,

if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things. The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you.”

Living well includes dwelling on the things that are true, noble, just, pure, and lovely, and if you dwell on those things you will honor your parents, and you will reap the blessing of living well. Those things I just mentioned give you a good reputation among men, and that honors your parents.

BTW, we are to honor our parents also in how we take care of them when they can no longer take care of themselves. They took care of you when you could not take care of yourself. The condition of parents may necessitate them going to nursing home, but those nurses in that nursing home cannot fulfill your responsibility. Even in that condition, you are to honor your parents.

Conclusion:

Children, do you want to honor your parents? Do you know what you need to do first?

You need to get saved. The most important decision you can ever make is the decision to believe in the Lord Jesus Christ.

People debate on how old a child has to be to be saved. I don’t want any part of that debate because Jesus told his disciples to let the little children come to him.

If a child knows what sin is, if a child knows he is a sinner, if a child knows he cannot go to heaven because he is a sinner, if a child knows Jesus Christ as the Son of God who died for his sins and was resurrected on the 3rd day, that child can be saved, and I do not care how old the child is.

I do know this. The children in our Hope’s and Mitzie’s classes, which are the two younger classes, have the gospel presented to them. Why would I try to deter those children from making a public confession of faith because of their age?

Well, I am going to tell you this. I am not going to do it. If a child wants to get saved, as far as I am concerned, that child can be saved. Griffin is the perfect example. Griffin was five or six, and he knew exactly what he was doing.

A child has the most capacity to believe.

Matthew 19:14 “But Jesus said, “Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven.””

As we get older, we become more cynical, more close-minded to the truth. A child is not skeptical. A child has the maximum capacity to get saved because he or she has not totally experienced the results of living a sinful life.

It was a little boy who had enough faith to give everything he had to Jesus, and a miracle we call the feeding of the 5,000 was the result.

Jesus says, “Let the little children come to me”, and children, that is the greatest way to honor your parents.

During VBS, Joey-Mac told Lauren this after Lauren asked him what he had learned, and this is what he said:

“You know mom, Jesus saves.” That’s a 2-year-old dear friend.

Roy knows what Jesus has done, and Roy is so sincere. It is just a matter of time before they are ready to say publicly that they believe in Jesus Christ. Oh dear friend, the faith of a child.

My prayer is that all of theses young ones get save before their hearts are darkened by the sin of the world, and if you are sitting here lost this morning, no matter your age, my prayer is that you will get saved this morning.

John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.”

Will you let the world know this morning that you believe in Jesus Christ?