06.29.25 Withdrawal

Series: Christian Discipline

Intro: In our series on discipline, we’ve discussed how discipline is the essential characteristic of the disciple of Jesus: To subscribe to, follow, and teach others the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Last week we talked about how that discipline includes helping one another live as disciples of Christ, and we discussed how admonition includes both warning and rebuke, and the place of love and concern from which admonition must flow. Jesus taught us that we were to love each other as Jesus loves us (John 15.12), and just as Jesus both warned and rebuked His followers, we too are to warn and rebuke one another.

Sadly, admonition isn’t like morphene, where if you administer enough of it it will overwhelm any effort to withstand its effect.

Those whom we admonish still have free will, the ability to say “No” and refuse warning and rebuke. Then what do we do? Sit on our hands and say “Oh well, we tried”.

Title Slide: This morning concerns “Then what”.

Today, Lord willing, we will examine what faithful Christians are to do when we have followed the teachings of Jesus regarding brethren who are in rebellion against Him.

The word most commonly assigned to this is “withdrawal”, but where do we even get the phrase “withdrawal” from?

It comes from the KJV rendering of 2 Thessalonians 3:6 KJV:

King James Version Chapter 3

6 Now we command you, brethren, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye withdraw yourselves from every brother that walketh disorderly, and not after the tradition which he received of us.

Now we could center the entire morning on this one passage and have at least enough information to get started in the process of knowing what to do about rebellious brethren. But thankfully the Bible gives us more than one verse on the subject, which enables us to find out more quickly what we must do.

Slide: What “the preacher”, “the elders”, “The church down the road”, “Social Media”, or “What I’ve always heard/thought” are immaterial to today’s discussion: The only thing we are concerned with this morning is “What the Bible says about Withdrawal”

Slide: What does it say, what does it mean, and what does it look like if you’re doing it right?

What the Bible Says about Withdrawal

Matthew 18:17 “If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.”

We do well to remember the context of this verse, which we studied last week.

In Matt. 18.15-16, we had an “escalation of admonition”, starting with an individual brother who has been sinned against “laying it on the mind” of another sinful brother.

When that was ignored, then more are summoned to assist in the admonition.

If that is ignored, then the entire church (or “care team”) is summoned to the situation, beseeching and teaching and seeking to understand and help the wayward brother/sister to see the error of their way and turn back.

Note v.17, the ESV, CSB, and even the old ASV note the severity of this final rejection “If he doesn’t pay attention even to the church” (CSB) “and if he refuse to hear the church also” (ASV)

If a person after all of that decides to tell all of us “No”, then so long as that continues we are to regard that person as a “Gentile” and a “tax collector”.

“Gentile”: Someone who is now not among God’s people. They have chosen to forsake God’s way, to cut themselves off from Him. “tax collector”: That doesn’t mean “Oh, like Zacchaeus who is seeking God even while in a sinful state.” Tax collectors were widely known for their wickedness, and the one who refuses to turn from their sin is to be likewise known for their refusal to turn from sin.

The most basic point about withdrawal is that the one who refuses to heed admonition and continues in sin is to be treated very differently than before by those who follow Christ.

Romans 16:17–18 “I appeal to you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and create obstacles contrary to the doctrine that you have been taught; avoid them. For such persons do not serve our Lord Christ, but their own appetites, and by smooth talk and flattery they deceive the hearts of the naive.”

Again, the context helps us understand what sort of people Paul is talking about.

If you’re in your Bible, look up at v.1-16: What sort of people are given there?

“my fellow workers in Christ”...”beloved”...”Greet Mary, who has worked hard for you...” “my beloved in the Lord”, “Greet Apelles, who is approved in Christ”, “Greet the beloved Persis, who has worked hard in the Lord”, “Greet one another with a holy kiss”.

Do you know what links ALL of these people together, the people Paul asked them to greet and welcome and hold in high regard? THEY ARE ALL FAITHFUL TO CHRIST, WORKING DILIGENTLY IN HIS KINGDOM, and as such we regard them as family, we welcome them and greet them and eat with them and willingly share in a close relationships with them!

What’s the difference in v.17-18?

“watch out”...”avoid them. For such persons do not serve our Lord Christ, but their own appetites...”

Paul is describing people who are not serving as faithful fellow workers in the Kingdom, and instructing the Romans to watch out for them!

The KJV of v.17 reads “mark them that are causing the divisions” The word used there [Gk. skopeo] doesn’t mean to draw a mark on them, like a “brand” or “label” but instead it means “look out for”, or “notice”, we might even say “highlight” them!

The same word is used in Philippians 3:17 “Brothers, join in imitating me, and keep your eyes on those who walk according to the example you have in us.” (ESV)

Why? What will happen we refuse to notice their rebellion & persist in welcoming, greeting, and associating with these wayward brethren, what can happen? “by smooth talk and flattery they deceive the hearts of the naive”

In short, these brethren are dangerous because they can pursuade you and influence you and sedate you into acceptance and eventually adoption of their own sinful ways!

1 Corinthians 5:9–11 “I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people— not at all meaning the sexually immoral of this world, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. But now I am writing to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler—not even to eat with such a one.”

The occasion for 1 Cor. 5 is a man among the brethren in Corinth who is living in sexual immorality (he has his fathers’ wife - v.1), and Paul says immediately that this unrepentant Christian should “be removed from among you” (v.2)

Here, Paul is not forbidding all association with sinners in general (which is impossible), but if there is a brother or sister among them, “anyone who bears the name of brother”, who has refused all the levels of admonition and remains in their guilt of sin willfully, the Corinthian brethren were not to associate with them.

Furthermore, note in v.9 that Paul had ALREADY WRITTEN TO THEM on this particular subject! Apparently, he had written beforehand to address this sort of thing, but they hadn’t listened the first time! (Side note: Congregations don’t always get withdrawal right the first time, and sometimes there is much room for obedience, and improvement and consistency!)

Coming back to the text: To what degree was the association to change? v.11: “not even to eat with such a one”.

Finally, note that there aren’t certain sins that result in withdrawal, and some that don’t. Paul lists the sexually immoral, greedy, idolatrous, and so on, but then notice again the phrase: “not even to eat with such a one”.

“with such a one”: With a person like this, one who refuses to repent of their sin!

This is a similar sort of phrase as the “works of the flesh” passage in Galatians 5.19-21, which lists a great number of sins and ends with the phrase “and things like these”!

No matter what the sin is, if a brother or sister in Christ refuses to repent of it following escalated admonitions, it stands as cause for withdrawal.

2 Thessalonians 3:6 “Now we command you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you keep away from any brother who is walking in idleness and not in accord with the tradition that you received from us.” 2 Thessalonians 3:14 “If anyone does not obey what we say in this letter, take note of that person, and have nothing to do with him, that he may be ashamed.”

Now, the verses that fill the gap between these two bookends is specific to “idleness”, or refusal to work.

But notice how it begins: If there is “any brother” (a Christian) who is “walking in idleness” (they haven’t just had an “episode”, they are continually and unrepentantly in sin, which is not in accord with how they were taught by the apostle Paul), they were to “keep away” from them.

Furthermore, in v.14 those who refused Paul’s admonition in the letter were to be noted (or “marked” would be another good version of that phrase) and then they were to “have nothing to do with him”.

Here, we also see some of the purpose for withdrawal: “that he may be ashamed” “ashamed” = [entrepo]

From the “Topical Lexicon” (Biblehub) “In the congregational sphere ἐντρέπω functions medicinally. • 2 Thessalonians 3:14: public disassociation aims “so that he may be ashamed,” driving the disorderly brother back to obedience. • Titus 2:8: exemplary speech and conduct are intended “so that those who oppose us will be ashamed, having nothing bad to say about us.”

Both passages show corrective shame operating within clear gospel parameters—never for personal vindictiveness but for restoration and the church’s witness.”

You can see as we work through these passages we’re building a larger picture, a larger concept of what we as Christians are to do with brethren who refuse to come back to the light.

To that picture, we must add one more passage: Titus 3.10-11

Titus 3:10–11 “As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him, knowing that such a person is warped and sinful; he is self-condemned.”

Here, the divisive person is condemned, just as in Romans 16.17, but Paul adds another detail: They have condemned themselves!

We sometimes hear from the outside world and from misguided brethren regarding church discipline: “Well, you all are just condemning people to Hell.”

Note in this passage who is responsible for condemning the divisive person: Themselves!

If someone refuses escalated admonition (which you can see even in this passage), what other conclusion could be reached?

The congregation isn’t condemning anyone: They are identifying one who has done so themselves!

Again, we have a descriptor of the appropriate attitude: “have nothing more to do with him”

The word for “have noting more to do with him” is simply translated “reject” in the KJV, and the idea is “reject” or “refuse” to have association with them.

The word here for “warped” (ESV) is can be translated “perverted” or “turned inside-out”: The brother/sister in Christ who refuses to repent of their sin is backwards, turned wrong-side-out, they are warped! They are in the Spiritual “upside-down”, and since they refuse to turn back to the light, we cannot and will not associate with them into the darkness!

What These Texts Teach About Withdrawal

The Bible teaches Christians to Withdraw from Unrepentant Brethren.

The Bible teaches that when a fellow believer refuses to listen to repeated admonitions and persists in sin, they should be treated as an outsider, like a "Gentile" or "tax collector" (Matt. 18:17).

We were told in Rom. 16.17 to “avoid them”, in 1 Cor. 5.11 not to “associate with them”, and in 2 Th. 3. to “keep away” from them and in Titus 3 to “have nothing more to do with them”.

The command to withdraw from unrepentant brethren is one that involves the whole local church: Matthew 18.17 requires that the local church admonish the individual, so then when that final admonition is rejected, the local church must then regard that individual as a “Gentile”: Outside the group.

In this sense, withdrawal is a physical manifestation of a spiritual reality: This person no longer walks among us, no longer walks in the light, and so we remove our voluntary associations with them.

The Bible ascribes two purposes for withdrawal: Protection and Admonition

We have seen from the scriptures that the purposes of withdrawal are twofold: 1. Protect the community from the negative influence of the rebellious Christian, and 2. Help the rebellious Christian feel shame and realize the gravity of their actions, which is meant to lead them to repentance.

First, In Romans 16:17–18 and Titus 3:10–11, Christians are warned to "watch out for" and avoid those who cause divisions and lead others astray.

In Romans 16 these people were serving their own interests and using flattery to deceive others.

As Rom. 16.18 put it: “such persons do not serve our Lord Christ” They are no longer living as disciples of Jesus, keeping His teachings and following His will.

Withdrawal helps to insulate faithful brethren from the spiritually hazardous environment generated by a “formerly faithful member” or someone who calls themselves “ex-CoC”

Withdrawn-from brethren often utilize “flattery and smooth speech” to draw away more from the faith, making these people dangerous to your spiritual health.

As Paul put it in 1 Corinthians 5:6 “Your boasting is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump?”

There’s a reason why in our homes we don’t keep food in the same cabinets as the wasp spray or the drain cleaner, and it’s not because the good food will ruin the poisonous chemicals.

Second, we also saw the admonition side of withdrawal in 2 Th. 3.14: “that he may be ashamed”

Let us be abundantly clear: While the rebellious brother or sister draws breath on this side of the grave, there is hope for repentance, forgiveness, restoration, and healing!

Withdrawal does not mean we are to regard these people as enemies! The very next verse in 2 Thessalonians 3 reads this way: “Do not regard him as an enemy, but warn him as a brother.” (2 Th. 3.15)

Lines of communication must remain open and they must be used in a godly way to draw them back! Admonition does not cease, but voluntary association does.

The Bible Assigns Severe Association Restrictions to Withdrawal:

In passages like 1 Corinthians 5:9–11 and 2 Thessalonians 3:6, 14, Paul emphasized that Christians should not associate with those who refuse to repent.

According to what we’ve read, the changes in association are as follows:

Avoid them

Do not associate with them

Keep away from them

Have nothing to do with them

Do not even eat with them.

I think based on this, a good working definition of withdrawal is something like: “the suspension of all voluntary social contact until a brother/sister repents”.

I tried to choose those words carefully, and here’s why:

I say “suspension” because it need not be permanent, and the goal is this is a temporary measure.

I say “all” because there isn’t a pick-&-choose element of when we withdraw, and when we don’t. One of the greatest hinderances to the effectiveness of withdrawal is lack of consistency, either that I am not complete in my withdrawal, or not all of us are involved in the practice of withdrawal!

I say “voluntary” because not all social contact is voluntary:

We may see the person at the same sporting event, at the same wedding or funeral, or at the grocery store.

We’re not to literally avoid walking down the same aisle as them, or refusing to sit on the same side of the field as them.

If so, then how would we have opportunity to “warn them as a brother”? (there’s a good chance that waiting for them to come back through the doors to this building so we talk to them is a losing proposition!)

Some contact is involuntary, and we must use those instances to further the Kingdom and the spiritual welfare of others, including the unrepentant Christian.

I say “social contact” because not all contact can be forbidden, and not all contact is social.

What if the rebellious Christian is a family member for which the scripture says I am responsible, like a child, parent, or even a spouse?

What if the rebellious Christian is my employer or an employee? (Sadly, I can imagine that relationship might shift rather quickly, unfortunately)

Withdrawal does not negate our God-given responsibilities toward those individuals, and yet, because of unrepentance and rebellion against the Most High, there must be a discernable, definitive change in attitude toward those brethren, as difficult as that is to do.

What Does Withdrawal Look Like If We’re Doing It Right?

Withdrawal is done in love, not anger or pride.

Goal: Restoration, not punishment. We are not in the business of punishing anyone. Our business, and the business of the Gospel, is in telling the world how they may escape punishment through Jesus Christ.

2 Thessalonians 3:15 “Do not regard him as an enemy, but warn him as a brother.”

Galatians 6:1 “Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.”

A Christian practicing withdrawal rightly will do so precisely because they care deeply for the person, praying for their repentance and being ready to receive them back when they turn.

Withdrawal is based on clear, ongoing, unrepentant sin.

1 Cor. 5.11 described a man involved in sexual immorality, & Paul rebukes the church for tolerating it. Romans 16.17 describes those causing “divisions and create obstacles contrary to the doctrine” (cf. Titus) 2 Th. 3 described those persisting in idleness and refusing to obey Paul’s written words. Matt. 18.16 says “If your brother sins against you...”: Which sin is Jesus talking about?

Withdrawal is not over minor disagreements or personality clashes, but when someone who claims to be a Christian refuses to repent of any sin after repeated correction.

This includes infidelity. It includes a refusal to assemble faithfully with the saints. It includes anything that falls under the heading of “sin”.

Withdrawal follows the biblical process of escalated admonition.

Matthew 18:15–17 lays out a process: Go to the person privately. Bring one or two others. Bring it before the church. If they still won’t repent, treat them “as a Gentile and a tax collector.”

Titus 3:10 “As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him,”

This shows withdrawal is a last resort after multiple steps of loving confrontation.

It also means that all future conversations with the wayward intentionally seek repentance and restoration.

It is our job to bring up the issue, to seek to teach, pursuade, and rebuke.

Withdrawal maintains personal holiness and church integrity.

Again, the phrase Paul used in 1 Corinthians 5:6 was “A little leaven leavens the whole lump.”

What was being allowed to persist “among them”, that which Paul ordered to be purged from among them, was not holy nor righteous.

The church is called to holiness, & continued association with open sin sends the wrong message and corrupts those who are called to be holy as God is holy!

If we turn a blind eye to our wayward brethren, we no longer dwell together in “sincerity and truth” (1 Cor. 5.8)

Withdrawal is not a cold or hateful cutting-off, but a plain spiritual boundary.

The person withdrawing:

Doesn’t engage in close, approving fellowship (e.g. meals, intimate conversation).

Still shows kindness and concern.

Avoids bitterness or gossip.

Conclusion: Withdrawal works. (2 Cor. 2.4-8)

Read with me 2 Corinthians 2:4 “For I wrote to you out of much affliction and anguish of heart and with many tears, not to cause you pain but to let you know the abundant love that I have for you.”

THAT, brethren, is how we must accomplish the work of withdrawal.

It hurts us deeply to do so.

We do so not to cause pain, but to express love.

While we separate ourselves from the wayward, we do not shun them.

We communicate earnestly with them about their souls.

My final point this morning is that if given the opportunity to do so, withdrawal works.

James 5:19–20 “My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back, let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.”

Withdrawal can bring back a rebellious sinner from their wandering, and save their soul from death.

Are you living now in rebellion against God?