Fix Your Focus

Opening Story

Cameron’s 23 point promise

The game was on the 23rd of the month

He had promised his ex-girlfriend he would score 23 on her birthday

He was at the free throw line

I knew about it…He asked if I’d be mad if he missed it on purpose

I told him I’d get the rebound.

He missed…I didn’t get the rebound…We ended up losing the game.

THE DRAMA THAT ENSUED

SO MUCH FOCUS ON THEM BEING ABLE TO GET BACK TOGETHER…BECAUSE HE WAS IN LOVE WITH HER

Cameron didn’t marry Whitney

His worry was really not a big deal

BUT IT WAS IN THAT MOMENT.

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Sermon Setup: Here’s what I know

There have been times and will be times again when you are so focused on something like…

a breakup,

a friend drama,

a bad grade

a denial for v bucks…

that it felt like the whole world was caving in?

Like this one thing controlled your whole mood?”

Main Setup Tonight, I want to show you how to shift your focus so it doesn’t steal your future. Because…

You will be formed by what you focus on…

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FIVE MOVES TO FIX YOUR FOCUS (Psalm 25)

1.  Go to God First

Psalm 25:15–16 NLT

15 My eyes are always on the Lord, for he rescues me from the traps of my enemies. 16 Turn to me and have mercy, for I am alone and in deep distress.

This portion of the passage starts with David having an honest conversation with Himself.

David didn’t fake it.

He didn’t numb it.

He faced it—and brought it to God.

I’m not suggesting to you that when you have troubles you need to ignore them…

This is not a suck it up and get over it message.

There’s a difference between ignoring and magnifying.

We have a tendency to magnify what we maintain control of.

When I try to handle the situation on my own…I typically let the situation get blown out of proportion.

When you’re having a bad day…Take it to God.

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Bring him the pain

We tend to think that God is only interested in our praises…BUT HE WANTS OUR PAIN POINTS AS WELL

Bring him your fears

Bring him your frustrations

Bring him your questions

God isn’t intimidated by your anxiety, your depression, your anger, or your confusion. He just wants you to bring it to Him first…not after you’ve tried everything else.

Practical Application: Take our struggles to God before we start trying to fix them…

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2.  Know Your Tendencies

Psalm 25:17 “The troubles of my heart have enlarged…”

David’s saying, “I know myself. I blow things up. I overthink. I spiral.”

Sound familiar?

We overthink that text.

We replay that one comment.

We assume everyone hates us because someone left you on read.

Maybe it’s a legitimately bad situation.

A parents divorce

A friend is abused

An addiction won’t let go.

No matter how big or small the issue may be…When I understand my tendency to blow something up…I can better navigate when I begin to do so.

This is the concept of regulating emotions.

__________ Learning to regulate emotions

Anxiety, depression, manic episodes, etc…are often simply manifestation of dysregulated emotions.

Our response to having blown things out of proportion is often one of two things.

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We vent

This is when you tell someone exactly how you feel and give your emotions your words.

This seems like a good thing.

But purely venting about the way we feel is actually just external dysregulation.

Just getting my feelings out there doesn’t make them healthy.

In fact it can have a detrimental effect

Proverbs 18:21 NLT

21 The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.

Be careful what you give your words to…

When I say nothing ever works for me…Nothing ever works for me.

When I say nobody likes me…I begin to live in a reality wherein nobody likes me.

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We hide

This is when we pretend like the emotions we are having are not real.

I’m not really sad…I’m not really scared…I’m not really bothered by the things they said.

This is internal dysregulation and is like trying to submerge a beach ball in the pool

It might stay down for a minute but eventually it will come come back up with greater force than it went down.

What should we do?

God’s plan for processing emotions is as follows

acknowledge the feeling

name the emotion

feel it effectively

appropriately express it to God and to someone we trust.

We have to understand our patterns…to give too much focus or magnify our issues to an unhealthy degree.

Practical Application: Journal your emotional patterns. What do you always tend to blow up?

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3. Identify What’s getting your air time?

Psalm 25:18–20 NLT

18 Feel my pain and see my trouble. Forgive all my sins. 19 See how many enemies I have and how viciously they hate me! 20 Protect me! Rescue my life from them! Do not let me be disgraced, for in you I take refuge.

Bad days are guaranteed…because life is not easy

But bad days are not all there is.

When your focus is completely consumed by painful emotions and negative realities…then that is an indication that something is wrong.

David is zoomed in on only the pain points in his life in this portion of text.

David is spiraling: pain, problems, sins, enemies.

He’s so focused on the wrong things that he can’t see what’s still right.

While there are seasons when the things that are wrong seem to outnumber the things that are right.

Often that concentration is because of our concentration.

I RARELY FIND WHAT I’M NOT LOOKING FOR!

You will always find what you're staring at.

ILLUSTRATION OF ZOOMED IN CAMERA FEED

Focus on failure? You’ll feel defeated.

Focus on fear? You’ll feel anxious.

Focus on God? You’ll find peace.

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4.Work on what you can control

Psalm 25:21 NLT

21 May integrity and honesty protect me, for I put my hope in you.

There are a lot of things that are outside of your control

You can’t control if you become popular at school or not

You can’t control what people put in the comment section.

You can’t control how Justin and Haley’s relationship pans out

But we can control how we live our life.

I control my reactions.

I control my words.

I control my loyalty.

David understands that he can’t minimize his enemies or his trouble.

But he can live a life of integrity

He can life a life of honesty

He can live a life wherein he is at peace with God.

How does this apply to you?

You can’t control everything in your life.

But you can control your character.

We can choose to be real, to stay honest, to live with integrity.

We have to Stop trying to control our situation and start controlling the state of our soul.

Practical Application: Ask yourself this week: Am I being honest—with God, with myself, with others?

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5. Serve Someone Else

Psalm 25:22 NLT

22 O God, ransom Israel from all its troubles.

The ultimate moment where David breaks free from his personal struggles…

Is when he determines to pray for others and their struggle.

It’s hard to feel sorry for myself when I’m serving the needs of others.

The truth that we have to keep in front of us…is that even on our worst days…there is always someone who has it worse.

At the end, David’s not even praying for himself anymore. He’s praying for his people.

Self-pity says, “Poor me.” Service says, “How can I help someone else?” The quickest path to healing is not by staring deeper into your pain. The quickest path to healing is by stepping out and loving others.

 Application: Who can you encourage this week? DM them. Sit with them. Pray for them.

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CLOSING

Your focus will shape your future.

So tonight—what are you going to fix your focus on?”

You’re getting ready to go back to school in just a few weeks.

Will anxiety get your focus?

WIll drama get your focus?

Will your past patterns get your focus?

Paul gives us a cheat code for having a right focus as Christ followers…

Philippians 4:8 NLT

8 And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.

If you are looking for a filter of what you should focus on…here it is.

When the intrusive thought comes…ask yourself.

Is it true?

Don’t give your focus to a lie…

Is it honorable?

Don’t give your focus to what tears others down…

Is it right?

Don’t give your focus to that which is detrimental to your destiny

Is it pure?

Don’t give your thoughts to that which is perverting your purity

Is it lovely?

Don’t give your thoughts to what creates division or drama

Is it admirable?

Don’t give your thoughts to that which would hurt your reputation.

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What are you zoomed in on that needs to be flipped tonight?