When Good Things become God Thins. Love is Not All You Need (Chapter 2)

Genesis 29:15–35 ESV

15 Then Laban said to Jacob, “Because you are my kinsman, should you therefore serve me for nothing? Tell me, what shall your wages be?” 16 Now Laban had two daughters. The name of the older was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. 17 Leah’s eyes were weak, but Rachel was beautiful in form and appearance. 18 Jacob loved Rachel. And he said, “I will serve you seven years for your younger daughter Rachel.” 19 Laban said, “It is better that I give her to you than that I should give her to any other man; stay with me.” 20 So Jacob served seven years for Rachel, and they seemed to him but a few days because of the love he had for her. 21 Then Jacob said to Laban, “Give me my wife that I may go in to her, for my time is completed.” 22 So Laban gathered together all the people of the place and made a feast. 23 But in the evening he took his daughter Leah and brought her to Jacob, and he went in to her. 24 (Laban gave his female servant Zilpah to his daughter Leah to be her servant.) 25 And in the morning, behold, it was Leah! And Jacob said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? Did I not serve with you for Rachel? Why then have you deceived me?” 26 Laban said, “It is not so done in our country, to give the younger before the firstborn. 27 Complete the week of this one, and we will give you the other also in return for serving me another seven years.” 28 Jacob did so, and completed her week. Then Laban gave him his daughter Rachel to be his wife. 29 (Laban gave his female servant Bilhah to his daughter Rachel to be her servant.) 30 So Jacob went in to Rachel also, and he loved Rachel more than Leah, and served Laban for another seven years. 31 When the Lord saw that Leah was hated, he opened her womb, but Rachel was barren. 32 And Leah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Reuben, for she said, “Because the Lord has looked upon my affliction; for now my husband will love me.” 33 She conceived again and bore a son, and said, “Because the Lord has heard that I am hated, he has given me this son also.” And she called his name Simeon. 34 Again she conceived and bore a son, and said, “Now this time my husband will be attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.” Therefore his name was called Levi. 35 And she conceived again and bore a son, and said, “This time I will praise the Lord.” Therefore she called his name Judah. Then she ceased bearing.

We live in a world that worships love.

Not covenant love.

Not self-sacrificing love.

But romantic, all-consuming, heart-fluttering, passion-over-promise love.

And our culture has discipled us to believe that if we don’t have it, we don’t matter.

If we don’t feel it, we aren’t alive.

If we don’t chase it, we’re missing out.

But the Bible has clearly spoke on this:

This kind of love doesn’t simply disappoint.

It enslaves.

And one of the most tragic examples of this in the Bible

is also one of the most relevant to our modern idolatry.

Jacob, the son of Isaac, and the grandson of Abraham, was a man on the run.

He had just betrayed his brother, deceived his father, and lost everything that gave his life meaning.

He had no home.

No inheritance.

No family.

No hope.

Until the day… he saw “her”…

For it was “LOVE at first sight…”

or so he thought.

As we read, Genesis 29 tells us that Rachel was “lovely in form and beautiful.”

And Jacob became obsessed,

In a culture where marriages were more about status than romance,

Jacob was willing to work seven years to win her hand.

Listen to how Genesis 29:20 put it.

Genesis 29:20 ESV

20 So Jacob served seven years for Rachel, and they seemed to him but a few days because of the love he had for her.

That’s romantic.

It’s poetic.

And it’s also revealing.

Jacob wasn’t just in love,

He was consumed.

Why?

Because he wore his heart on sleeve which caused his attraction to Rachel to become idolatrous. (Explain)

Jacob wan’t just looking for a wife, he was looking for Salvation.

So when he saw Rachel, his heart whispered, “If I have her, everything will be okay.’”

Jacob had never known the love of his father, Isaac.

He had lost the love of his mother, Rebekah.

And as far as we can tell, he didn’t yet know the love of God.

So when he saw Rachel, his heart whispered, “If I have her, everything will be okay.”

And that longing didn’t just make him lovesick.

It made him blindly enslaved.

The theologian Robert Alter points out that Jacob’s request to Laban—“Give me my wife. I want to lie with her.”—is unusually blunt for ancient Hebrew.

Jacob is not restrained.

He is overtaken.

Emotionally.

Intellectually.

Sexually.

Spiritually.

He’s completely consumed by her!

This wasn’t just courtship.

This was captivity.

And when we make romance a savior,

we don’t just overvalue our desire.

We blind ourselves to reality in an enslaving way.

Jacob was so desperate for Rachel that he missed the warning signs.

He wasn’t thinking clearly.

He wasn’t praying for wisdom.

He wasn’t asking the Lord, “Is this from You?”

He was driven by emotion, not discernment

Laban never actually promised Rachel outright.

He just said, “It’s better I give her to you than someone else.”

That wasn’t a yes.

It was a loophole dressed up as a blessing.

But Jacob was so fixated on her that he heard what he wanted to hear.

And that’s what idolatry does.

It blurs our vision.

It clouds our judgment.

It makes us easy to deceive.

Idolatry makes you hear what you want to hear and miss the warning signs.

When your heart is already made up

when your mind is already closed

you will always misread what God may be trying to show you.

You’ll take vague answers as confirmations.

You’ll overlook red flags.

You’ll assume God’s blessing simply because your desire feels strong.

Jacob’s obsession with Rachel didn’t just make him willing to work seven years.

It made him unable to think clearly for seven minutes.

He was so emotionally attached that he became spiritually unaware.

And in that fog of infatuation, Laban saw his opportunity.

Because idolatry always attracts exploitation.

When someone else sees that you’re willing to do anything for something, they’ll use that to their advantage.

Jacob should have asked more questions.

He should have sought counsel.

He should have slowed down.

But instead, he raced ahead—heart first, eyes closed.

And it cost him fourteen years of his life.

All because he couldn’t see the trap his desire had set.

Genesis 29:25 ESV

25 And in the morning, behold, it was Leah! And Jacob said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? Did I not serve with you for Rachel? Why then have you deceived me?”

This is one of the most haunting sentences in the Bible.

It’s one that captures the cosmic disappointment of every heart that has looked for ultimate joy

in someone or something that is less than God.

And isn’t that how idolatry works?

It does!

You thought you were getting beautiful Rachel

But, and bless her heart, it was always ugly Leah.

This is not just Jacob’s story.

This is ours.

We chase love or marriage or sexual fulfillment like it will fix us.

We pin our hopes on the idea that if someone would just choose us, we would finally be complete.

But when you make romantic love your god, it will always betray you.

Because no person can bear the weight of your identity.

No relationship can fill the gap that only God was meant to fill.

It’s why so many marriages today are not just strained—they are suffocating.

Spouses try to get from each other what only Christ can give.

And it’s no better with singles

Singles refuse to rest until they’re seen, chosen, completed.

We are a generation that has traded the altar of worship for the altar of dating apps.

Where souls are swiped away in the name of love.

And I’m not saying dating apps are bad btw,

I’m saying the mentality that often comes with them is.

Some people mock this as just foolish emotionalism.

But Scripture sees it deeper.

It’s slavery.

And sometimes, the more we chase it,

the more enslaved we become.

Just ask Sally.

She was beautiful.

Even as a child, she realized that her appearance gave her power.

But over time, that power turned into a prison.

She believed she had no worth unless a man loved her.

She became obsessed with her weight and looks…

She stayed in abusive relationships.

She let herself be used.

She became a slave to love.

Because she had asked love to do what only God can.

When we take a good thing—like romance—and ask it to be the ultimate thing, it becomes a counterfeit god.

Counterfeit gods never bless, they only take.

They take your peace.

They take your clarity.

They take your soul.

And it wasn’t just Jacob that this happened to,

it’s what happened to Leah as well.

She wasn’t beautiful like her sister.

She wasn’t chosen like Rachel.

She wasn’t wanted by her husband.

She was the girl nobody saw.

The woman nobody chose.

The wife nobody loved.

So what did she do?

She made the same mistake Jacob did.

She looked to her spouse for salvation.

Genesis 29:32 ESV

32 And Leah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Reuben, for she said, “Because the Lord has looked upon my affliction; for now my husband will love me.”

Do you see that?

“Surely now my husband will love me.”

Leah has a son.

But she’s still unloved.

So she has another son.

Still not enough.

So then again, she had a third son.

Still clinging to a hope that Jacob finally now might “become attached” to her.

Every birth was a cry for validation.

A striving for identity and acceptance.

Every child a desperate attempt to be seen.

Leah turned her motherhood and marriage into her identify, and it left her empty.

But there’s a cultural twist here we often miss.

Leah was doing the “traditional” thing.

See, in that time, a woman’s identity came from being a wife and mother.

Her worth came from having sons.

And yet—despite doing everything the culture said would fulfill her—it didn’t work.

Because idolatry is solely found in our modern hookup culture.

It’s also alive in traditional family values.

And Leah shows us that,

as she turned motherhood into her savior.

And it left her empty.

Until… something finally changed….

Genesis 29:35 ESV

35 And she conceived again and bore a son, and said, “This time I will praise the Lord.” Therefore she called his name Judah. Then she ceased bearing.

Do see the difference this time?

No mention of Jacob.

No demand for love.

Just worship.

“This time—I will praise the Lord.” - She says.

Finally… something changes.

Up to this point, every time Leah gives birth, she names the child out of pain.

Out of longing.

Out of deep, unhealed ache.

“Now my husband will love me.”

“Now he will see me.”

“Now he will be attached to me.”

Reuben.

Simeon.

Levi.

All of them carry the emotional weight of a woman trying to heal her soul with children.

Trying to earn love by giving more.

Trying to be chosen by someone who had already chosen someone else.

But then comes Judah.

And this time… she doesn’t say anything about Jacob.

She doesn’t say anything about being seen, or attached, or wanted.

She just says—“This time, I will praise the Lord.”

It’s a breakthrough.

It’s a shift.

It’s repentance.

This is what it sounds like when the heart finally turns.

Not just away from idols.

But toward joy.

This is what it looks like when someone stops trying to earn love and starts living from it.

She says, “This time.”

As in—I’ve tried everything else.

I’ve tried to make him love me.

I’ve tried to make babies fix me.

I’ve tried to win affection through performance.

But not this time.

This time—I will stop reaching for Jacob’s arms and lift mine in praise.

This time—I will stop demanding to be loved and start declaring that I already am.

This time—I will not name this boy after my pain, but after my praise.

Because when you finally praise God for who He is—not for what He might give you—you are finally free.

That’s what repentance really is.

Not just feeling bad.

Not just letting go.

But grabbing onto something better.

Repentance is exchanging false gods for the true and living God.

It’s learning to say,

“If I never get his love…

If I never get her attention…

If I never get the life I imagined…

But I still get God…

Then I’ve gained everything.”

Leah lost the approval of her father.

She lost the affection of her husband.

But she found the one love that could never be taken away.

The Lord saw her.

The Lord heard her.

And finally, she saw Him.

And she worshiped.

Because worship is the sound a soul makes when it stops begging to be loved and starts believing it is.

And with that praise, she didn’t just birth a son.

She birthed a legacy.

Because this son—Judah—would carry the promise.

Judah’s name would become the name of a tribe.

And from that tribe would come a King.

And that King would be called… the Lion of the tribe of Judah.

Jesus came not through beautiful Rachel.

But through forgotten Leah.

Because grace doesn’t run through the polished. It runs through the broken who’ve learned to worship.

And because God loved her,

He chose to do something astonishing.

Because the child born from Leah was Judah.

And from Judah would come Jesus the Messiah.

Not through Rachel, the beauty queen.

But through Leah, the girl no one wanted.

Why?

Because the gospel turns the world upside down.

Jesus came not as the desired one, but as the rejected one.

He had no beauty that we should desire Him.

He was despised and forsaken.

A man of sorrows.

And why?

Because He came for people like Leah.

And people like Jacob.

And people like you and me.

See, Jesus became the man nobody wanted—so we could become the beloved children of God.

And when that truth grips your heart, it does what romance never could.

It frees you.

Free to love without demanding to be completed.

Free to serve without fearing rejection.

Free to walk away from toxic relationships with courage.

Free to enjoy romance without being enslaved by it.

Because you are already fully known.

Already fully loved.

Already fully secure in the love and acceptance of the God of love.

Leah got her life back when she praised the Lord.

Sally got her life back when she stopped saying, “Men are my life,” and started saying, “Christ is my life.”

And that’s the question each of us must face:

Who—or what—is your life?

If you say, “This person completes me,”

you are placing divine expectations on human shoulders.

Or if you say,

“Once I get married, I’ll finally be happy,”

you are setting yourself up for disillusionment.

But if you finally come to say,

“Christ is my life,”

you are anchoring your soul to what will never change.

Because He is the Bridegroom who sees.

The Savior who stays.

The only love that lasts.

So maybe you’re here and your story feels like Leah’s.

Unchosen.

Unseen.

Unwanted.

You don’t need a spouse to fix that.

You need a Savior who knows you by name.

Or maybe you’re like Jacob.

Running from the past.

Desperate for something to make you whole.

Rachel can’t fix that.

Only Jesus can.

So don’t trust idols, because in the morning it will always be Leah, never Rachel.

But if you belong to Christ, in the morning—it will also always be grace.

Not because you earned it.

Not because you were beautiful.

But because God set His love on you.

And unlike romance, His love will never betray you.

So praise Him.

Rest in Him.

And stop asking others to do what only Christ can.

Because love is not all you need.

Jesus is.