Covenant and Covering (3)

“The Spirit of Comparison & The Spirit of Inadequacy: Dividing the Covenant”

Wednesday Night Bible Study – Session 4

Focus: How these twin spirits attack unity in marriage and relationships—and how to overcome them in the Spirit.

Key Texts:

2 Corinthians 10:12 (KJV)

“But they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.”

Genesis 3:7 (KJV)

“And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked…”

Ephesians 5:31-32 (KJV)

“For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery…”

I. The Spirit of Comparison

Definition:

The Spirit of Comparison is a demonic influence that fuels jealousy, dissatisfaction, and self-judgment by measuring one’s worth or success against another person, especially within close covenant relationships.

Characteristics of the Spirit of Comparison

1. Identity Confusion

Makes you doubt your unique calling and personality.

Creates spiritual amnesia—forgetting who you are in Christ.

Psalm 139:14 (KJV)

“I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made…”

2. Envy in Disguise

Envy wears the mask of admiration but breeds bitterness.

This spirit celebrates others outwardly but resents them inwardly.

James 3:16 (KJV)

“Where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.”

3. Silent Competition in Marriage

Spouses may feel they must “outdo” each other spiritually, financially, or emotionally.

It distorts roles from complementing each other to competing with each other.

“Why is he more respected?” “Why does she get all the praise?”

4. Resentment of Each Other’s Strengths

Instead of celebrating differences, the spirit of comparison weaponizes them.

It says: “If you’re strong, that must mean I’m weak.”

How Comparison Divides the Covenant

It shifts focus from unity to rivalry.

It turns God-ordained differences into personal threats.

It causes one spouse to feel superior and the other to feel inferior.

It erodes gratitude for the person God gave you.

Galatians 5:26 (KJV)

“Let us not be desirous of vain glory, provoking one another, envying one another.”

II. The Spirit of Inadequacy

Definition:

The Spirit of Inadequacy whispers the lie: “You’re not enough. You don’t measure up. You’re failing.” It is rooted in shame, past wounds, and distorted identity.

Characteristics of the Spirit of Inadequacy

1. Chronic Self-Doubt

Second-guessing every decision or emotion.

Can’t receive encouragement—filters it as pity or fake.

Exodus 4:10 (KJV)

“I am not eloquent… I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue.” – Moses felt inadequate even in front of God.

2. Performance-Based Worth

Measures personal value based on accomplishments or perfection.

Feels loved only when useful.

Titus 3:5 (KJV)

“Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy…”

3. Fear of Rejection

Inadequacy fears that if you’re seen fully, you’ll be rejected.

Leads to emotional withdrawal in marriage—shutting down communication and vulnerability.

4. Toxic Comparisons Turned Inward

If the spirit of comparison says, “They’re better than me,”

then the spirit of inadequacy says, “I’m worse than everyone.”

Proverbs 14:30 (KJV)

“A sound heart is the life of the flesh: but envy the rottenness of the bones.”

How Inadequacy Divides the Covenant

It causes one spouse to feel unworthy of love or incapable of leading.

Leads to emotional detachment or even spiritual resignation.

Keeps couples from being spiritually transparent or affectionate.

Creates an unspoken inferiority complex that poisons communication.

Genesis 3:10 (KJV)

“I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.”

Inadequacy always leads to hiding.

III. How to Overcome These Spirits

1. Repent of Agreement with the Lie

Both spirits work by agreement. If you believe their lies, they gain legal ground.

Repent for comparing or devaluing yourself (or your spouse).

2 Corinthians 10:5 (KJV)

“Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God…”

2. Declare Identity and Covenant Truth

Against Comparison:

“I am uniquely made. I don’t need to be anyone else to be valuable in God’s eyes.”

Romans 12:6 (KJV) – “Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given to us…”

Against Inadequacy:

“I am enough—not because of what I’ve done, but because of who I belong to.”

2 Corinthians 3:5 (KJV) – “Not that we are sufficient of ourselves…but our sufficiency is of God.”

3. Practice Mutual Encouragement in Marriage

Speak words of affirmation over each other daily.

Celebrate each other’s strengths without comparison.

Expose the lies together in prayer.

Hebrews 3:13 (KJV)

“Exhort one another daily…lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin.”

4. Cover Each Other Spiritually

A covenant partner is not a competitor but a covering.

Where your spouse feels inadequate, you speak faith.

Where they feel compared, you speak value.

Ecclesiastes 4:10 (KJV)

“But woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.”

Final Exhortation:

The enemy doesn’t need to tempt you with sin if he can torment you with self-doubt.

If Satan can make you feel less than, he’ll keep you from walking in covenant strength. But when you expose and evict these spirits, your relationship becomes a fortress of grace, not a battlefield of insecurity.

Closing:

Are you comparing your gifts, roles, or success with your spouse or others?

Have you believed the lie that you are not enough?

Are you ready to break agreement with these covenant-destroying spirits?

Lay down the spirit of comparison and inadequacy at the altar tonight. Let God renew your mind, restore your value, and rebuild the oneness of your marriage.

Homework / Devotion:

Read Psalm 139 and Ephesians 2 – meditate on your identity.

Ask your spouse: What strength do you see in me that I don’t see in myself?

Pray together daily for 5 minutes, breaking comparison and speaking truth aloud.