Tame The Tongue

Section 1: Why Not Everyone Is Called to Leadership

Text: James 3:1 -2.

1.1. The Weight of Spiritual Leadership

-James opens this section with a caution, not a condemnation. He’s not discouraging leadership but warning that leadership comes with serious responsibility.

-In the early church, “teachers” were not just information-givers—they were spiritual guides, examples, and doctrinal guardians.

-Teachers and leaders shape lives, doctrine, and sometimes eternal destinies. The consequences of their words echo in the souls of others.

-Their words matter more, because they are listened to more.

-Think of a teacher like a surgeon. While the average person can make mistakes and recover, when a surgeon makes a mistake, it can cost a life. In the same way, spiritual leaders use the scalpel of the Word, and mishandling it can do real damage.

1.2. The Power of the Tongue in Leadership

-James is connecting this to the theme of the tongue. What is the main tool of a teacher? Not the pen or the platform—it’s the mouth.

-And the mouth, according to James, is incredibly hard to control and dangerous when left unchecked (which he'll expand on in the rest of the passage).

-Leadership puts you in a position where your words carry weight, and they often live longer than you do.

-James isn the only one who adresses this….

 Luke 12:48 – “From everyone who has been given much, much will be required.”

-Jesus emphasizes that privilege brings responsibility.

-The higher the platform, the greater the accountability.

-Leaders aren’t just measured by what they say—but by how what they say affects others.

 Proverbs 10:19 – “When there are many words, sin is unavoidable, but the one who controls his lips is prudent.”

-The more you speak, the more opportunities you have to sin with your speech.

-Teaching requires speaking often and in public—making it more likely to fall into pride, exaggeration, flattery, harshness, or even falsehoods.

-That’s why wisdom, restraint, and humility are essential qualities in those who teach.

What This Doesn’t Mean

James isn’t saying teaching is bad.

He isn’t discouraging people from aspiring to grow in faith and leadership.

He is saying: Don’t pursue leadership lightly. Don’t pursue it for the wrong reasons. Don’t enter it unprepared. So many today in the west have cheapened church leadership and have used it to build there own lucrative platform instead of bringing glory to God.

-it’s like applying to be a pilot. Flying the plane is exciting—but if you don’t know what you’re doing, you’ll crash and take a plane full of people with you.

-Not everyone is called to be a teacher or leader, and that’s okay. It doesn’t mean you’re less spiritual or important.

-It simply means that God gives different gifts for different purposes (see 1 Corinthians 12:4–7).

-If you are called to lead:

Do so with trembling, not pride.

Do so with preparation, not presumption.

Do so by leaning on Jesus, not on your charisma or cleverness.

If you aren’t called to teach, don’t rush to the mic—run to Jesus. Seek to grow deep, not just to be seen.

Gospel-Centered Focus

-Jesus didn’t use His words to exalt Himself—but to heal, confront, comfort, and save.

-In John 6:68, Peter said, “Lord, to whom will we go? You have the words of eternal life.”

-If we follow Jesus, our mouths—and especially the mouths of leaders—must reflect His heart and holiness.

-James warns us that teaching requires a careful tongue—but now he broadens the focus. Whether you’re a leader or not, your tongue still holds great power. Like fire, it can warm a home or burn it down. Let’s look at how James describes the tongue as a wildfire…

Section 2: The Tongue Is Like a Wildfire

Read James 3:3-6.

2.1. The Power of Small Things

-James uses a familiar biblical technique: big outcomes from small beginnings.→ Just as a bit controls a horse or a rudder steers a ship (vv. 3–4), so the tongue directs our lives.

-But now he moves from control to destruction. The tongue isn’t just influential—it can be catastrophic.

-A spark, by itself, seems harmless. But if dropped in dry grass or wind-swept hills, it becomes devastating.

2.2. The Destructive Potential of the Tongue

-James uses very forceful language to describe the tongue:

“The tongue is a fire” – destructive, consuming, untamable.

“A world of unrighteousness” – not just sinful speech, but a mouth that opens the gates to the entire fallen world system: pride, envy, deceit, slander, boasting, manipulation, and hate.

“Stains the whole body” – our words reflect back on all we are. One statement can destroy a person’s entire reputation.

“Sets the course of life on fire” – words have the power to ruin your future, burn bridges, and even shape the direction of someone else's life.

“Set on fire by hell” – a sobering statement. James is saying the tongue, when unchecked, can become an instrument of hell itself—used to wound, accuse, divide, and destroy.

Whats does this look like:

-A quick, sarcastic jab at someone’s appearance, ability, or past can embed itself like a splinter in their soul.

-People often carry decades-old wounds caused by a parent, spouse, teacher, or friend who spoke in anger or cruelty.

-One lie or a rumor, even whispered, can destroy:

A marriage.

A friendship.

A reputation.

A ministry or church.

Once spoken, words can’t be unspoken. They spread like wildfire, doing damage long after the speaker forgets them.

Proverbs 18:21 “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.”

Words can kill hope, destroy joy, and even drive people to despair.

But they can also revive, heal, and give life. It’s not just about avoiding bad speech—it's about using speech for good.

Matthew 12:36–37 – “I tell you that on the day of judgment people will have to account for every careless word they speak. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.”

Jesus holds us accountable, not just for hateful or profane words, but for careless words.

What we say when we're tired, angry, or trying to impress others still matters to God.

-Left to itself, the tongue will reflect the darkest corners of the heart.

-Just like a wildfire needs fuel, an untamed tongue finds bitterness, pride, envy, and insecurity in the heart—and it feeds on them.

-Without Christ at the center, our mouths will betray what’s wrong inside us.

-Jesus is the only One who never spoke a sinful word (1 Peter 2:22). Yet He took the punishment for our destructive words—our lies, gossip, slander, and prideful boasts.

-At the cross, Jesus was silent before His accusers so that you and I could be forgiven for every careless word. And when we trust Him, He doesn’t just save us—He begins to transform our speech.

Section 3: The Heart and Mind Guide the Tongue

Read James 3:7-10a.

-The tongue doesn’t act on its own. It’s a messenger of what already exists in the heart and mind.

-James makes this painfully clear: the same mouth that praises God can turn around and curse people—revealing a conflict deep within.

-This contradiction doesn’t come from the mouth itself, but from a divided inner life.

- The tongue is a thermometer, not a thermostat. It doesn’t set the condition of your soul—it reflects it.

Luke 6:45 “A good person produces good out of the good stored up in his heart. An evil person produces evil out of the evil stored up in his heart, for his mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart.”

-If bitterness lives in the heart, it will leak through the lips.

-If pride rules the mind, it will spill out in arrogant speech.

-You can’t fake kind, truthful, pure speech long-term—eventually your words will expose you.

The Role of the Mind

-James’ audience is likely familiar with the Old Testament idea that a person’s speech flows from their inner being.

-But the New Testament expands this: our mind must be renewed to be transformed.

-The tongue is often quick to speak evil because the mind is filled with garbage: envy, worry, lust, fear, self-righteousness.

Romans 12:2 “Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.”

-When your mind is soaked in the world, your words will reflect it.

-When your mind is saturated in the Word of God, your speech will begin to heal, encourage, convict, and bless.

-James says we curse people made in God's image, and that’s what makes it so serious.

-To curse someone is not just being angry—it means speaking to or about them in a way that strips them of dignity.

-You can’t claim to love God while verbally attacking those made in His image.

1 John 4:20.“If anyone says, ‘I love God,’ and yet hates his brother or sister, he is a liar.”

What does this look like:

When a person is full of fear, they often speak negativity, doubt, and anxiety.

When a person is full of pride, they speak with boasting, self-promotion, or condescension.

When a person is full of envy, they tear others down with gossip or criticism.

But when a person is full of the Spirit, they speak with grace, truth, peace, and love.

-If our hearts and minds are guiding our tongues, then the question becomes: Can we ever truly tame the tongue? James says it’s humanly impossible—but with God, all things are possible. Let’s explore how we can surrender our speech and begin to use our words to glorify God.

Section 4: How to Tame the Tongue and Glorify God

Read James 3:8 “but no one can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.”

The Frustrating Truth: We Can’t Tame the Tongue on Our Own

-James gives us a hard truth: “no one can tame the tongue.”

-That’s not an excuse to give up—it’s a call to surrender.

-This statement is meant to humble us, remind us of our weakness, and drive us into total dependence on Christ.

-The tongue is described as:

Restless – It won’t sit still. It’s like a wild animal pacing back and forth.

Evil – Its natural tendency is not toward holiness, but harm.

Poisonous – Words can carry venom, slowly killing relationships, reputations, and even someone’s mental or spiritual health.

- Like a wild horse, the tongue will throw you off and trample others unless it’s brought under the control of the Master.

-If we cannot tame the tongue in our own strength, then we must submit to the One who can.

John 15:5 says “I am the vine; you are the branches... the one who remains in me and I in him produces much fruit, because you can do nothing without me.”

-True speech transformation doesn’t begin in the mouth—it begins in the heart’s connection to Jesus.

-As you abide in Christ daily—through prayer, Scripture, and obedience—your desires change, your heart softens, and your words begin to reflect your Savior.

-Sometimes taming the tongue means saying nothing at all—and sometimes it means saying the right thing at the right time

Proverbs 17:27–28 “The one who has knowledge restrains his words, and one who keeps a cool head is a person of understanding. Even a fool is considered wise when he keeps silent.”

-Wisdom isn’t always found in speaking—it’s often found in waiting.

-Learning to pause, reflect, and pray before speaking can prevent conflict and allow the Spirit room to work.

-Simple Practice: Before you speak in a difficult moment, ask yourself:

Is it true?

Is it necessary?

Is it gracious?

-Speech wasn’t given just to communicate—it was given to glorify.

-Use your tongue to:

Bless God in worship.

Encourage others with truth and hope.

Build people up with Scripture.

Proclaim the gospel with boldness and clarity.

Defend the vulnerable with grace and strength.

Apologize and make peace when necessary.

Ephesians 4:29 “No foul language should come from your mouth, but only what is good for building up someone in need, so that it gives grace to those who hear.”

-Now, James wraps up this section with a haunting but honest reflection: How can we bless God and curse others from the same mouth? This is the mark of a divided soul. Let’s close by exploring what James 3:10 reveals about the danger of being double-minded and the call to leave that life behind.

Section 5: We Must Leave Double-Mindedness Behind

James 3:10 – “Blessing and cursing come out of the same mouth. My brothers and sisters, these things should not be this way.”

-James paints a picture of spiritual contradiction:

One moment, we’re praising God.

The next, we’re tearing down His image-bearers with criticism, gossip, or slander.

-It’s as if we walk out of church singing “Great Are You Lord,” then get in the car and yell at our spouse, rant about a coworker, or mock someone on social media.

-James is blunt: “This should not be this way.” There’s no excuse, and it shouldn’t be normal.

-This isn’t just inconsistent behavior—it’s the mark of a divided heart.

The Bible repeatedly warns about being double-minded:

James 1:8 “...being double-minded and unstable in all his ways.”

-It means you say you trust God, but live as if you don’t.

-You worship with your lips, but won’t surrender your tongue.

-A double-minded person has one foot in faith and the other in the flesh—and they’re constantly stumbling.

-It’s like trying to drive a car with the gas and the brake pressed at the same time. You’re not going anywhere—just making a mess.

-James continues this thought in verses 11–12 with imagery:

A spring doesn’t produce both fresh and salty water.

A fig tree doesn’t produce olives.

A grapevine doesn’t produce figs.

What comes out reveals what’s inside.

-If both blessing and cursing flow from your lips, you don’t need to work on your vocabulary—you need to go deeper to the root.

- Is your mouth a fountain of grace—or is it polluted by the world, flesh, and pride?

-This isn't a call to perfection—it’s a call to pursue integrity.

-You can't speak holy things on Sunday and harbor hate Monday through Saturday.

-Jesus doesn’t want part of your mouth—He wants the whole thing.

-Let your speech be consistent with your faith.

Psalm 86:11 “Teach me your way, Lord, and I will live by your truth. Give me an undivided mind to fear your name.”

-Repent of the ways you’ve spoken curses, gossip, or anger—God’s mercy is deeper than your mess.

-Ask God for an undivided heart—one that isn’t split between His glory and your flesh.

-Speak life intentionally:

When tempted to curse—pray instead.

When tempted to tear down—build someone up.

When tempted to gossip—change the subject or speak truth in love.