2 Lies and The Truth WK 2

Intro

Have you ever said “I just need a little me time”?

Of course you have. We all have, sometimes it’s necessary.

But I think “a little me time” has become “all-the-time” for many of us. What started out as a little bit of a time of rest has become a way of life - not that we are always doing nothing or that everyone is just lying around all day napping. But that for much of our society we have found a way to construct a life centered around “me.”

Since 2020, Americans spending on self-care and self-help, that’s everything from therapy and gym memberships to self-help books and meditation apps, has increased by over 30%.

The average American now spends anywhere from $1000.00-$5000.00 on self-care and self-help and that number is increasing despite economic concerns.

But here’s the most dramatic statement. The Barna Group did research about this and they concluded that over 80% of Gen Z and Millennials have stated that prioritizing there own personal happiness is their life’s highest goal.

And before we get too judgemental most of the generations are well above 50%.

The reality is that we live in a culture that is obsessed with personal happiness, instant gratification, self-care.

We have influencers and companies preaching a Gospel of “Do what makes you happy” non-stop. “you do you, be who you are”, “Put yourself first,” “you deserve to be happy.”

But let me hit you with a bit of a truth bomb.

The more you chase happiness, the more it runs from you (or escapes you)

You may have noticed this yourself. Happiness always seems to be just out of reach.

No matter how much we prioritize ourselves, it seems like we end up more anxious, isolated, and empty.

In fact another study stated that even though consumers of lifestyle and wellness media content were overall physically healthier they actually experienced an increase in phsychological distress with increased symptoms of depression and anxiety compare to those who didn’t consume the content. So they were experiencing higher “well-being” yet higher distress.

so that leads us to ask “hows it all working out for us?”

What if the secret to true happiness isn’t putting yourself first…

What if it’s putting others ahead of ourselves?

What if the real answer to happiness and fulfillment in life is actually putting Jesus first.

And not in the way that most people think - so you can get what you want out of life - because that is just using Jesus to get what you want.

What if Jesus knew what He was talking about when He said in Matthew 16:25 “For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it.”

That is what we are going to look at today.

So the first lie that we have to debunk even before we get into the “me first” think is:

1. You Deserve to Be Happy

We all experience difficult times in our life. We all experience those moments when it seems like everything is just coming at you, or piling on, and your stressed and your tired and you think “what did I do?”

So in comes the world and says - nothing you don’t deserve all of that. You deserve to be happy. Do whatever you need to do to be happy.

It sounds good, it sounds nice, it looks good on a t-shirt, it plays well on instagram or tik tok.

But this mindset makes is think that happiness is a right, but when life doesn’t go your way, you feel robbed of something that you are entitled to.

If you deserve it, and don’t have it, then we can blame God, or others, or ourselves

Jesus never said “you deserve to be happy.” But he does offer joy, peace, and purpose which are deeper than just feeling happy.

You see the Bible says in Romans

Romans 3:10–12 “As it is written: “There is no one righteous, not even one; there is no one who understands, no one who seeks God. All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one.””

So before we even begin to understand what truly matters, let’s first understand, and this is a very hard truth to swallow but, none of deserves to get everything we want, none of us deserves to be happy - none of us is righteous in ourselves. We all have sinned and what we deserve is punishment.

So before we go an blame God for not getting everything we want and not experiencing any kind of discomfort in this world remember, we deserver punishment for our sin, for our unrighteousness

But because of God’s love for us, He gives us His gift of grace and included with that is something deeper and more lasting than just happiness, he gives us joy and contentment - even when things get uncomfortable.

Question: So instead of asking “What will make me happy,” you begin each day asking, “Who can I serve today?”

That brings us to another lie that we see all the time.

If you want to be happy in life, if you want to feel fulfilled

2. Put Yourself First

Again it sounds good - even logical right.

You do you, be who you are. No one else is going to do it, if you want to be happy, you want to be fulfilled you have to put yourself first in life.

We mentioned it before but I want to take a moment in the text.

Matthew 16:24–26 “Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?”

When we put ourselves first and do whatever we want to do, we make a terrible god of our own life.

The truth is that the more you put yourself at the center, the more everything around you spirals out of orbit.

This is what Jesus is talking about here.

There is no room in the Christian journey for two gods. Either Jesus is our Lord or we are.

We believe that God created us and He knows what is best for us and the entire world.

God knows, in His infinite wisdom and knowledge that in order to obtain what we have really been looking for, we have to be willing to give up our lives, everything that matters to us, everything that the world would say is most important. All of the things that our flesh wants; and pick up our cross and follow Jesus.

We think that all of the stuff that we spend our time, treasure, and talent on, or to gain in this world; all of the stuff that we find our identity in, will fulfill us, but it won’t. What your soul-your whole being longs for, can only be found in following Jesus.

That’s the decision - to move past the immediate gratification, to move past what you think you want in order to gain what you really need.

That only happens when Jesus becomes the central reality of our lives. The nucleus in the center that everything else revolves around.

So here is a question for us to help us move Jesus to the center.

Question: What part of your life have you kept at the center that Jesus is asking you to surrender?

So, if we don’t deserve happiness in the first place, but are given contentment, peace, and joy, which are deeper and last longer, and, if we are honest, is really what we are looking for anyway.

And if putting ourselves and what we think will make us happy really wont.

Then what is the truth.

What does it look like practically when Jesus is the center of our lives, we we revolve around Him instead of the other way around.

Here’s the truth the can, if you let transform your whole life.

3. Consider Others Better Than Yourself

We get this from a letter that the Apostle Paul wrote to a group of Christians in the early church.

Philippians 2:3–5 “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:”

This is what Jesus modeled: He didn’t seek to be served but to serve.

It’s not about thinking less of yourself, its really about think of yourself less.

There is a spiritual thing that happens. There is a joy that we can experience when we shift from being me-focused, or self-focused to others-focused.

It doesn’t shrink your life it actually expands your life.

There is a saying that goes: “The happiest people you know aren’t the ones who have the most, but the ones who give the most.

Now we have to be careful not to be prideful about it or boast about it. But our heart posture must be one of humility and others focused.

When Jesus summarized the law for us - Love God Love People. What some people don’t understand is that those two are linked.

In Matthew 22:37–39 “Jesus replied: “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

When Jesus says that the second is like the first he is saying that it is off equal value and importance. Yes Jesus says loving other people and caring for them, looking out for them, sacrificing for them is of equal value and importance as loving God.

In fact most theologians would say that Jesus is saying that our Love for God is manifested in our love for people and our love for people is empowered by our love for God: Meaning they are linked.

You can’t love God without loving people and you can’t really love people unless you love God. They flow together.

So here is my question for us that I hope will challenge us this week.

We can talk about this stuff all day long but if it doesn’t cause us to evaluate our lives and change our actions then we are wasting our time.

So here’s the question: Who in your life can you elevate this week with your words, your time, or your service.

For some of you it is a family member, for some of you it is someone that you don’t like (for some that might be the same person)

But this week, who can you go out of your way, especially if it costs you something to elevate, to bless, to lift up.

Closing,

Remember when make ourselves the center of our lives, it might feel right at the time, it might sound right to the world, but ultimately it leads to emptiness.

Jesus call to lose your life to find it isn’t a burden, it’s an invitation to freedom and true life.

So don’t settle for chasing happiness instead chose joy through surrendering to Jesus

Challenge: (2 challenges)

If Jesus isn’t first in your life - today we would like to invite you to let him be the center.

If your life is more about what is best for you, and you need to start living your life to benefit others - (who is that going to be?)