A Friend loves at all times
Recovery at the Rock • Sermon • Submitted • Presented
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17 A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity.
Introduction:
1. Real friendships takes time to build.
1. Real friendships takes time to build.
24 A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
True friendship doesn’t happen overnight; friendship must be nurtured intentionally.
Part of being intentional is being able to be somewhere when you say you are going to be there when you say you are going to be. This means that you have to reach for stability. When I say “reach for stability.” I mean, we need to take our relationships as seriously as we do our Jobs. By as serious as our jobs, I don’t mean that we put our friendships before work in our calendars. We value our friendships and take our relationships seriously.
Friendship cannot be built on excuses. For that matter, life cannot be built on excuses. The Big Book talks about an easier, softer way in regard to recovery. The truth of the matter is that many of us have been seeking a more straightforward, more gentle approach to life. An easier, softer way in regard to life does not exist! Our lives are what we have made of them. There are no real excuses. For the conditions of our lives. I cannot blame what happened to me., I cannot blame my spouse; I had a role in accepting or not accepting my situation.
As we build friendships, we start surface and build deeper as time goes on.
As we start friendships, we learn that the foundations of my life have to be authentic and honest.
2. Before a person can be a true friend you have to be authentic and honest.
2. Before a person can be a true friend you have to be authentic and honest.
Authentic
Authentic
9 Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good.
Honest
Honest
25 Therefore, putting away lying, “Let each one of you speak truth with his neighbor,” for we are members of one another.
Authenticity for those who are early in recovery starts with being honest about where you are in life and recovery. We continue in authenticity by letting go of the need to be “perfect” in image only rather than growing into my ideals.
Authenticity for those who are early in recovery starts with being honest about where you are in life and recovery. We continue in authenticity by letting go of the need to be “perfect” in image only rather than growing into my ideals.
Rabbit trail: It is at this point that I must tell you honesty has nothing to do with saying everything you think at the time you think it and more to do with telling the truth. Using a filter to not offend people that you are attempting, to build a friendship with. It rather means taking all the noise in your head and boiling it down to a single fact.
Rabbit trail: It is at this point that I must tell you honesty has nothing to do with saying everything you think at the time you think it and more to do with telling the truth. Using a filter to not offend people that you are attempting, to build a friendship with. It rather means taking all the noise in your head and boiling it down to a single fact.
Filtering keeps you from sounding rude and unfeeling when you don’t intend to. Some examples of that may be telling someone that you have never experiencing that feeling right after someone was vulnerable with you and shared a deep feeling with you.
Filtering keeps you from sounding rude and unfeeling when you don’t intend to. Some examples of that may be telling someone that you have never experiencing that feeling right after someone was vulnerable with you and shared a deep feeling with you.
Filtering can include tone: whether I like it or not, how I sound when I am talking about something communicates how I feel. My wife can be in pain and sound mad. Then, of course, without thinking, I get angry because I think she is mad (she is not). Now, she is mad (when she wasn't before) all because of tone. If the heads side of the coin is being rude or aggressive, then the tails side of the coin would be being too sensitive or easily offended. Whether a person is aggressive and rude or sensitive and easily offended, the result is the same: drama. Good people are not called to raise us; they have no obligation to tell us why they don’t like us - instead, they quietly back away. Remember as we recover, lets remember to recover our basic manners.
Filtering can include tone: whether I like it or not, how I sound when I am talking about something communicates how I feel. My wife can be in pain and sound mad. Then, of course, without thinking, I get angry because I think she is mad (she is not). Now, she is mad (when she wasn't before) all because of tone. If the heads side of the coin is being rude or aggressive, then the tails side of the coin would be being too sensitive or easily offended. Whether a person is aggressive and rude or sensitive and easily offended, the result is the same: drama. Good people are not called to raise us; they have no obligation to tell us why they don’t like us - instead, they quietly back away. Remember as we recover, lets remember to recover our basic manners.
3. Relationships take time energy and money. (yes in that order)
3. Relationships take time energy and money. (yes in that order)
Time- Everyone has the same amount of time. no one get’s the same amount of years.
Time- Everyone has the same amount of time. no one get’s the same amount of years.
when thinking about time think about the kids who just died in the flash flood in Kerrville, Texas. Knowing now they they would not live an average life span, how valuable was each day of their life? Treat time as the most valued resource you have because it is. Try not to take for granted other peoples time even if you don’t value yours.
Energy- You can give someone all the time in the world however, if I give all the time in the world but I don’t show up with any energy (presence) than nobody wants my time.
Energy- You can give someone all the time in the world however, if I give all the time in the world but I don’t show up with any energy (presence) than nobody wants my time.
We often see this in married couples. What is often missing is the power of presence. It takes presence and energy to keep relationships going.
The relationships we are talking about change us! that is kind of the point. We need real relationships, deep relationships that are safe enough to do the things that growing in grace that allows for change.
We are present in this sense, we understand that as brothers and sisters in Christ, our friends are going to show the new us to our closest brothers and sisters.
If we are going to have long term relationships we have to make room for our friends to grow.
In fact as our friends grow we have the opportunity to grow with them.
Money- all relationships take money.
Money- all relationships take money.
Brian Foose and coffee.
4. The value of relationships is the power to heal.
4. The value of relationships is the power to heal.
Being able to build a relationship is the number one life giving skill.
Building relationships means being a good other half.
holding a confidence.
being able to someones meet emotional needs
not taking sides between
