1 John 3:11-24: Real Love in a Hateful World

Introduction

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Amazing the way people treat each other - no regard for human life. We blow up, express our anger, insult, etc. For some, they treat animals with far more respect and value than human lives.

For followers of Jesus, the way we treat each other should not only be with respect, but with absolute love. God is love, and one of the ways you know you are a child of God is by the way that you love.

John has been reminding us that the way we know we are genuinely saved is by the way we love others with the love of Christ. If that’s true, then we need to examine ourselves to see if we love like Jesus loves.

A clear contrast in this passage that causes us to ask ourselves: “Am I following the way of the world, or the way of Jesus?” The way you love others will help you answer that question.

What you’re probably going to discover as you read this passage is that you struggle to love. Some days you do it well, some days you don’t. Some days your full of anger and resentment. Some days you hurt the people who are closest to you. Is there any hope for you?

It’s likely that the very thing that is supposed to give evidence of our salvation (love), is something we struggle to show. We don’t struggle to get angry, to become bitter, or to be hurtful. That’s easy. What’s that say about your heart?

This morning, I want to show you three realities from this text that I think will help you to learn how to show real love in a hateful world.

The way of the world: “I want what’s best for me no matter who I hurt in order to get it.”

vs. 10 - Those who know God do what is right - and what is right is loving your brother or sister.

While we’re called to love all people, John especially interested in the way that we love other believers (John 13:35). It’s hard to love unbelievers well if you don’t first learn to love your brothers and sisters in Christ well.

vs. 11 - Cain - the first person born on planet earth - killed his own brother out of hatred. His actions proved that he was of the evil one, not God. From the beginning, ever since the fall, people have struggled to love.

vs. 12 - Why did Cain kill his brother? Evil was in Cain’s heart. Cain did evil while his brother did what was righteous. Cain was jealous of Abel. Cain couldn’t stand that God accepted Abel’s offering while God rejected his. Cain wanted what Abel had: acceptance, but Cain wasn’t accepted by God ultimately because he lacked what Abel had: love for God. Cain’s offering demonstrated his lack of love for God. He didn’t bring what God required.

vs. 13 - The world is much like Cain. It shouldn’t surprise us that the world hates followers of Jesus for our righteous lives devoted to God.

Ultimately, the world wants what Christians have: joy, hope, peace, satisfaction, abundant life. However, the world never find is because those who reject God are searching in the wrong places. The world hates us because the world ultimately wants what we have yet doesn’t believe that Jesus is the way to get what we have.

You shouldn’t be surprised that the world hates you since the world rejects the God who you love. However, you should be surprised when another follower of Jesus hates you. It’s one thing to be hated by those who we know don’t follow Jesus. It’s another to be hated by those who claim Christ.

vs. 14 - The way we know that we have passed from spiritual death to spiritual life is how we love fellow believers. To not love is to remain in death.

If you claim to follow Jesus but hate others, it could be evidence that you don’t know Jesus. because the Gospel changes us - that’s the point John has been driving home in this letter. Saved people act saved, and saved people love like Jesus loves. Saved people actually want the best for others, not the worst.

Someone who claims Christ yet hates his brother or sister in Christ is a murderer. (Think Sermon on the Mount. Jesus said that anyone who harbors anger in their heart towards somoeone and doesn’t deal with it is a murderer (Matthew 5:21-26).

The way of the world: “I want the best for me no matter who I hurt in order to get it…” This was Cain.

How do you know if you are like Cain? How do you know if you follow the way of the world? Ask yourself:

Do you get jealous and bitter when others succeed but you don’t?

Do you take joy in the struggles and failures of others?

Do you love to talk about the failures of others more than you talk about the growth of others?

Do you want the worst for others while wanting the best for someone else?

Do you end relationships out of jealousy and anger? Or, because you felt like you’ve been done wrong?

The Way of Jesus: “I want the best for others even even if it comes at a great cost to me.”

1 John 3:16 is the heart of the Gospel and sounds much like John 3:16. For God so loved you that He sent His Son - and the greatest act of love ever demonstrated was the atoning death of Jesus. Because God loves you and desires a relationship with you, He died the death that you deserve, sacrificially taking your sins upon Himself. He suffered in your place only to rise again from the dead defeating sin and death so you could be set free and brought into a relationship with the God of all creation.

John’s conclusion is simple: Since Jesus laid down His life for others, you should be willing to lay down your life as well. John teaching us something: the Cross is not only the means by which we are saved. It’s also the model by which we are to live - constantly giving ourselves for the sake of others. It seems overwhelming and impossible - but in reality it’s practical and down to earth.

Desiring the best for others is sacrificial. You probably won’t be called to physically lay down your life for someone, but you are called to give your life away. Sacrificial loves requires that you think of yourself less and think of others more. Sacrificial love is often costly - it can cost you what you want, your time, your resources, your reputation, etc.

Desiring the best for others is practical.

Love is giving away your resources as the Spirit leads to meet the needs of others rather than using your resources to simply make your own life better (vs. 16). More than writing a check…

Love is seeing your time as a gift to give to someone else rather than a resource for you to hoard for yourself. (e.g., This is my time…)

Love is resisting the need to defend yourself and making sure that your voice is heard and instead giving that person you don’t agree with a listening ear. It’s seeking to understand instead of seeking to be understood.

Love is being committed to overlooking minor offenses and give grace (Proverbs 19:11) instead.

Love is fighting the temptation to be critical and judgmental toward someone and instead finding ways to encourage them.

Love is giving someone the benefit of the doubt and working for unity rather than always trying to prove you’re right.

Love is giving someone kind and gentle words in the midst of conflict instead of attacking their character (Proverbs 15:1).

1 Cor. 13:5 - Love is not self-seeking. Love is selfless. It is always giving.

Being a loving person doesn’t mean you are a pushover. Jesus wasn’t. It doesn’t mean that you don’t speak the truth and stand for it. Jesus spoke the truth and stood for it. Being a loving person means that you love people more than the things you have or your political position. Being a loving person means you want the best for people - and the best way to love is to give someone Jesus.

We often find ourselves withholding love. We put people down. We ignore people. We avoid people. We belittle people. We take from people. John says to be careful. If you withhold love it may be evidence that God’s love does not reside in you (1 John 3:17).

The assurance of the Father: He Loves you even when you struggle to love like Jesus.

On the one hand, a lack of love for others could be evidence that you are not saved. On the other hand, we all struggle, even as believers, to love like Jesus loves. John wants us to examine our hearts to see if there is evidence of salvation, but he does not want true believers to doubt their salvation.

As a believer, you feel the conviction, not only conviction but condemnation. “There’s no way I can love like Jesus. I have so much anger in my heart… I struggle to forgive, etc. There’s no way that God loves me.”

John is reassuring. He knows that our feelings cause us to doubt, and he also knows we tend to condemn ourselves. John also knows that we’re not perfect. In this life, we’re never going to love like Jesus.

Rest assured, when your heart condemns you, God is greater than our hearts. He knows the work He’s doing in you. He is growing you. He sees the fruit of your salvation. In those moments that you condemn yourself and doubt your salvation, look at what God has done in your life. Don’t trust your feelings, trust the promises of God - He who began a good work in you is faithful to complete it (Philippians 1:6).

Vs. 21 – When I realize my identity in Christ does not change regardless of how I feel about myself… When I rest in His work, it gives me confidence. I approach Him with confidence as a child who wants to please my Father. I pray for His help to accomplish His will, and He answers my prayer.

Passage teaching I don’t have to doubt – I run to the cross and remember what Jesus has done for me. I remember my salvation is sealed at the cross and I have been given hope and purpose. I will never be condemned, even when I fail, because Jesus was condemned for me (Romans 8:1).

vs. 22-24 - By faith, I keep His commands to the best of my ability empowered by the Spirit while trusting that His promises to me are true.

When you struggle to love:

Don’t let your feelings hinder your call to love. Our feelings are often our greatest hindrance to obedience. “I don’t feel like Jesus loves me anyways, so I’m not going to serve Him today. I’m not going to love others. feel overwhelmed. God will understand if I don’t give my heart to Him fully today. I feel hurt. I feel rejected. I feel unwanted. I’m angry at the church or I’m angry with God – I’m not doing anything for Him.” A mark of maturity in Christ is obedience to Him in spite of how you feel. So, even if you don’t feel like extending love, do it anyways and see how God restores joy in your heart.

Talk to yourself. Remind yourself of the truth. Examples: When I have an outburst of anger toward my kids my feelings say, “I feel like a terrible father. How can I lead my church if I can’t even manage my house?” Tell myself the truth: Yup. I sinned. But God has already forgiven that sin and doesn’t hold it against me. Jesus went to the cross for a terrible dad like me, and His grace is sufficient and His Spirit powerful enough to make me into the Father I need to be.

You feel loved at your church, so why should you love the people here. You don’t fit in. You feel disconnected. Truth: You are a part of the body. You matter to this family.

Challenge: Talk to yourself. Quit listening to your feelings and continually tell yourself what you know to be true.

Have you been living by how you feel instead of living in obedience to the truth? Run to the cross. At the cross you’ll find that you never have to doubt God’s love for you regardless of how you feel. This morning, repent of building your faith on emotion rather than the truth.

Unbeliever: Know the truth. Jesus is the Son of God who came to a broken world to rescue sinful people. The truth is that He lived a sinless life and went to the cross to die in the place of sinners. The truth is that He was punished in your place. The truth is He rose victoriously, and the truth is you desperately Him. Repent and turn to Him today.