How To Pray

If I was to teach my kids how to pray, this is what I would say:

Matthew 6:7–13 “And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. “This, then, is how you should pray: “ ‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.’” (And some late manuscripts include: for yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.)

Notice Jesus did not say, “if you pray” but rather “when you pray.” Prayer is the culture of a Christian. Basketball players play basketball, plumbers do plumbing, electricians do electrical, Christians… Pray.

“Your Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask him!”

What do I pray about?

Literally anything and everything.

The problem is never too much praying, but always too little praying. A thriving prayer life is a life that is dependent on God. A small prayer life or with no prayer is a life dependent on self (a life that doesn’t need God) - how lame and boring. You are so small, God is so big, why would you not pray?

In fact, many times people only pray about big things! We start praying when we have encountered some kind of obstacle that we see is too big for us.

But in reality, there is nothing in our lives that is too small to be prayed about. There is nothing that should not be prayed about.

Are you concerned about that meeting at work tomorrow? Pray about it.

Are you concerned about your family’s financial well-being? Pray about it.

Do you want to have your own bedroom? Pray about it.

Did you want to go to Lego Land? Pray about it.

Are you bored? Pray about it.

Are you struggling in school? Pray about it.

In other words, pray about everything, we invite Jesus into every situation of your life.

What do I pray about? Everything.

Alarms - their purpose are to alert/remind us to do something.

I believe God created us with our very own alarm system that alerts us when it is time to pray - it’s called anxiety and/or worry and/or fear.

Philippians 4:6-7 “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.”

“Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.”

Be real - marriage. Our marriage changed when we stopped attacking each other and started praying for each other.

My point - pray about everything.

How Often Should I Pray?

I would answer, how often do you worry. How often are you dealing with emotions that do not lead to righteousness? Fear, worry, anxiety will not lead to righteous living - only faith in the love of God will.

This question kind of implies that prayer is simply a task we do. It’s like someone asking me how often they should talk to their wife. Prayer is not a chore. It is not something on a check list that we cross off when done.

Prayer is not something we fit into our life, but rather is the flow of our life. We conform our lives around prayer.

Truly, it is a continual conversation with the Almighty God who loves us and knows what we need and what others need.

Jesus said don’t be like the pagans who, “Think their prayers are answered merely by repeating their words again and again...” In other words, the pagans created formulaic prayer. Prayer is relegated to some kind of formula that manipulates the gods to get me what I want.

Rather, for us, prayer is exercising my intimate relationship with Father God.

Additionally, prayer is the fuel to our Spiritual life which gives life to everything else in our life. It is His presence in prayer that is the river of living water flowing through us.

Doctors run measurements of my body - bloodwork, blood pressure, etc. Why? To evaluate my physical health.

I went to the doc about heart burn… I know how to get it.

The Doctors will then say, don’t do that, do this and you will experience physical change and your body won’t burn out.

And as for me - your pastor, I am like your spiritual doctor. I want you to be spiritually and emotionally healthy (of course physically too)… You will burn out when you do not have a strong prayer life. The key to a thriving life of excitement and fullness - living in that river, where you don’t have to think about choosing joy because you walk in joy (Team Grace) is having a thriving prayer life!

Saint Augustine said, “What can be more excellent than prayer; what is more profitable to our life; what sweeter to our souls; what more sublime, in the course of our whole life, than the practice of prayer!”

And we will not let prayer become dead and dry by reducing it to some kind of pagan formula to manipulate God to do something we want, but rather it will be me spending time in his presence and practicing this intimate relationship throughout my day.

“I love you Father”

What Do I Say?

I believe we put way too much emphasis on “saying the right thing” and too little emphasis on the grace of the One who hears.

Which scares people from praying publicly, why? because they want to make sure they say the right thing and not be embarrassed.

Perhaps it is because we love the idea of having something to do with answer to prayer. “My prayer was answered because I said and confessed the right thing.”

Even if you prayed the perfect prayer and said the perfect thing, prayer is sooooo much more of the heart than just sound waves you make with your mouth.

Remember, God already knows what you are trying to say, because He sees your heart.

Therefore, remember: Prayer is an expression of sincere desire. It is not to inform God of things that he may be ignorant of and it’s not to manipulate god into doing something because you said the right thing, and the effectiveness of prayer is not affected by length or repetitiveness.

Biblical examples of effective prayer:

1 Chronicles 4:10 NIV “Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, “Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain.” And God granted his request.”

The dad that had a son possessed of a spirit that robbed him of speech and would hurt him. The dad said, “If you can do anything about it, pity us and do it.” Mark 9:22–24 ‘If you can’?” said Jesus. “Everything is possible for one who believes.” Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!””

Does this sound like a man flying high in faith, no but his heart was for His son and he went to the right place crying for help.

Psalm 5:1–3 “Listen to my words, Lord, consider my lament (continual sighing). Hear my cry for help, my King and my God, for to you I pray (His emphasis is on being heard). In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly.”

Our confidence is not in our prayer or praying but in the One who hears.

Matthew 8:25 “The disciples went and woke him, saying, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!”” And then Jesus asks them, where is their faith? But question - was their prayer answered?

God knows us, that we are weak and a work in progress.

Romans 8:26–27 “And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God’s own will.

The only contribution you provide is your weakness.

The point of this - He hears you when you talk to him. And yes, you will grow, and yes, your prayers and the language you use and what you pray will grow to conform to His will. Don’t strive for perfection, perfect words in prayer is not a prerequisit, it’s about your heart and expressing sincere desire to him. So just start praying wherever you are. He is gracious who Hears.

Have a Plan

Remember - plans exist for purpose. Example, if I want to get better at pickleball - I will make a plan to practice.

If I want to grow in my relationship with Father God, grow closer to Him (purpose) - I will make a plan to pray.

Have a place to pray:

Jesus often withdrew to a place of solitude. Where is your place of prayer? The car, the shower, the couch, etc.?

Have a prayer discipline

It’s good to have structure to your prayer life but again, we aren’t turning it into a checklist… Okay, I did it today.

Follow the prayer model of Jesus.

‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.’

“Our Father”

When we begin our prayers this way, we are reminded of Who it is we are talking to. Additionally you are reminded of the kind of relationship we have. Not as slave or servant to master, but as child to Father.

And I love when my kids talk to me, I am an imperfect Father, how much more does He love it when we talk to Him.

“Holy is Your Name.”

Worship Him for Who He is. He is worthy of our worship. Worship and recognize His utter greatness and this reminds me always: He is God, I am not. It puts me in my place as the one who is dependent on Him.

“Your Kingdom Come, Your Will be Done”

We pray for what God wants. Which means I should search for what He wants. Ask for what He wants.

What does He want?

Lost people to get saved, to know Him.

Saved people to be pastored.

Pastored people to be discipled.

Discipled people to mobilize and make a difference for His glory.

“Give us this day our Daily Bread”

At this part of Jesus’ model, I am giving God my requests for my needs.

There is a strong probability that by now, my needs are more aligned with what He wants. Needs correlate to goals and purpose - His Kingdom, His will. In other words - what do I need to accomplish what He wants?

Daily! God wants us to know that we need Him, not once a week on Sundays, but everyday we need Him! And when we come to him daily, it shows that we trust Him.

“Forgive us as we forgive.”

Own up to your failures, admit them to Him, be specific about it. God already knows, so you don’t have to be afraid of telling him, but this reminds us of how big His grace is for us and the cost to Jesus for our forgiveness.

Logic says, if I am forgiven of all these sins, I must give that same grace to others who have sinned against me. Who am I to hold something against someone else when God is not holding my sins against me.

“Don’t allow us to be led into temptation.”

Lord I need your help today to discern the path of righteousness. I need His protection to keep me from giving in to the enemy’s tactics which ultimately are designed to get me to shrink back from my faith and fellowship with my fellow believers.

Jesus is telling us that we need to pray for that protection.

“Yours is the Kingdom and the Power and the Glory Forever”

This closing part of prayer in Jesus’ model… What is it all about? or rather Who is it all about? Who’s the boss?

We remember that existence revolves around God not us.

We are part of His story, not him part of ours. History is His Story.

We live for His glory. And we recognize that in prayer.