Gentle / Controlled

Manuscript Template

Title:  Gentle / Controlled

Focus Statement:  

Function Statement:  

Tweetable Phrase:  

Main Text:  Daniel

Daniel 1:3-21 - Daniel refuses to eat unclean food

Daniel 3:16-23 - Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego thrown in the fire, “even if God doesn’t save us”

Daniel 6:6-16 - Daniel continues to pray and gets thrown into the lion’s den

Supporting Text:  

Gentle: Proverbs 15:1, Titus 3:2, Philippians 4:5, Ephesians 4:2

Controlled: Proverbs 25:28, 1 Corinthians 9:24-27

Redemptive Closure (point to Jesus):  

Matthew 11:29 - Jesus is gentle and lowly of heart

Matthew 26:20-25 - Jesus doesn’t want to humiliate, but give general warnings (maybe giving Judas one last chance at repentance)

Benediction:  Titus 2:11-12

Questions to Review

Is the bottom line clear? Main point should be able to be said in a single sentence.

What’s the opening line? Not hello, start with a question or something to grab attention.

Is the transition from the introduction to main point clear?

What’s my main point? Make it short and memorable

Does it matter? Is the topic relevant to the congregation?

Where is the power in the text? What word or phrase highlights the tension?

How am I moving toward application?

What is my main to-do (application)? Be specific.

What does it matter? The WHY creates urgency.

How am I closing? Have a plan.

5 Things Each Sermon Must Do With the Biblical Text

Teach it: Cultural context, exegesis, what does it mean?

Illustrate it: Add emotion, illustrations, pictures, stories.

Apply it: How do we respond?

Distinguish it: How is this different? Invite the Holy Spirit in.

Portable-ize it: Make it RHYME (no WIN in COMPARISON), ALLITERATE it, make it ECHO (who are of infinite worth to the infinite God), use a METAPHORE (the Root of murder is anger...only God can uproot it from our hearts), or make it CONTRAST (a life devoted to self, leave you alone)

https://ideogram.ai/t/explore

WELCOME

Good morning!!! My name is Ryan Hanson, and I have the honor of serving here at The Light KC as the lead pastor. I’m so glad you’re here with us.

‌Welcome to those joining us online. We hope you're doing well and hope to see you in person in the coming weeks.

And a special welcome to those joining us for the first time. We’re so glad you chose to be here.

ME/INTRO - Tension

How do you know if you’re succeeding at life?

According to the internet, and all the messages TV and movies send us about the culture we live in a person’s value (their success in life) is measured by the following three categories:

Fame:

What others think about you

Appearance

Grades

# of likes on social media photos

Weight

Money

Education

Income

Power

Job Title

All of these metrics focus on how we feel in the moment, prioritizing instant gratification and the subsequent hit of dopamine that gives us the pleasure we’re seeking.

This may be true of the culture we all live in, but is this the best way to live?

Should our perceived value be defined based on external factors and other people’s opinions?

Should our life be one great search for our next dopamine hit?

Way back in ~1,000 BC, King Solomon wrote a book of the Bible which is a compilation of wise sayings called Proverbs. In it, he warned against such living. He writes:

Proverbs 25:28 NIV

Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control.

By allowing our value to be determined by the opinions of others, by external factors we have very little to no control over, and making decisions based on how things will make us feel, we are the city with broken walls; vulnerable, at risk of being invaded by the innumerable temptations of this life.

Solomon’s answer to a life lived based on instant gratification is to choose to live a life of self-control, delaying our gratification; choosing to do things based on how they align with our values, not our feelings.

Self control being defined as:

Self Control

The ability to exercise restraint or control over one's feelings, emotions, reactions, and behavior, especially in difficult situations

The alternative to being controlled by worldly passions

These concepts were echoed by the Greeks in ~300 BD, and became known as Stoic Philosophy.

Stoic Philosophy measured the worth of a man based on their mastery of themselves. Their thinking was that giving in to every temptation was easy, mastering those temptations, delaying gratification, and acting in accordance with your values, not your feelings, was hard and should be honored.

And they were right, it is hard to live a life of self-control.

Living a life that perfectly aligns with values we’ve chosen to live by is hard.

WE - Tension

Over the last few weeks, as we’ve gone through the list of the fruits of the spirit, I know I have experienced how hard it is to live a life defined by these fruits of the Spirit. I feel like the last month has been a period of conviction by the Holy Spirit of all...

The times I’ve been unloving

The periods of my life when I have lacked joy

The situations where I have lacked faith and subsequently didn’t have peace

The many times I’ve been in a hurry and lacked patience

The words I’ve spoken to people that have not been kind

The ways I’ve treated people that was not good

And the times when I’ve been frustrated and given up, lacking perseverance

Maybe the Holy Spirit has been convicting you as well.

Where has the Holy Spirit lovingly pointed out that you could be more fruitful?

Where could the fruit that you’re already producing be bigger, more ripe, more plentiful?

That’s why I think self-control is last in the list of the fruits of the spirit.

Because self-control gives us the ability to actually do the previous 8.

Today, as we conclude our series “A Christian is...”, we’re going to look at the final two Fruits of the Spirit; gentleness and self-control.

Throughout this series “A Christian is...”, we’ve been circling around Matthew 7:20, where Jesus says

Matthew 7:20 NIV

20 by their fruit you will recognize them.

It is here that Jesus states that we will know true followers of His by their fruit; the fruits of the spirit found in Galatians 5:22-23, which reads.

Galatians 5:22–23 NIV

22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control.

We’re learning how God wants us to live these out, SO THAT these characteristics can become such an integral part of our character that our lives can serve a witness to God we serve.

We’re in week 5 of our 5 week series.

The first week we looked at how, as Christians, God calls us to reflect His unconditional / sacrificial Agape love to everyone, everywhere, at all times.

We then looked at how, as Christians, God calls us to be joyful, able to look past our current circumstances, living the life of a disciple; thinking, loving, and acting as Jesus did.

We continued the series, by looking at, as Christians, God call us to be at peace, believing in and trusting in what Jesus has already done on our behalf on the cross, knowing that no matter what happens to us here on earth, our eternal future is secure.

And patient, able to wait on God’s perfect timing because of the peace that we have in Jesus.

Last week, we looked at how, as Christians, God call us to be good, having the character of God, doing only what honors God.

And kind, living a life of love, responding to the needs of others.

And faithful, keeping their word, and persevering when life gets hard.

This week, we’re going to conclude our series by exploring what the Bible says about being gentle, and in control of our selves.

Because...

A Christian is...Gentle / Controlled

If you missed the previous messages, please feel free go to our website, TheLightKC.org, to catch up.

As we begin, please turn with me to the book of Daniel.

We’ll have the scripture on the screen, but if you have a Bible with you, or Bible app on your phone, I’d encourage you to turn to the passage and follow along. There is nothing that replaces having God’s word in your hand.

AND... if you don’t have a Bible, we have Bibles under the seats. If you don’t have a bible and would like one, please come see me after the service and I’ll get you one you can keep.

Let's dive in.

GOD - Text

I want to camp out in the book of Daniel today as, in my opinion, it is a book that gives us fantastic examples of a group of people being both gentle, but extremely self-controlled.

And, I don’t know about you, but sometimes I need a story (or example) of someone who does something well to give me hope that is possible.

Daniel is a book is about four Israelite boys who were taken captive by Nebuchadnezzar (the King of Babylon) after he besieged Judah. They were given the opportunity to be trained for three years before entering into the king’s service.

The 4 boys were Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah and the first step in their indoctrination was that they were given Babylonian names

Daniel - Belteshazzar

Hananiah - Shadrach

Mishael - Meshack

Azariah - Abednego

King’s Table

At the start of their training, they were also given access to the king’s table, offered the best food in the country.

But that is where the challenges started.

There were two problems with eating the food they were offered from the king’s table.

1 . The king’s table would have had all sorts of food that was not ceremonially clean per the Jewish law. They would have had breads, meats, fruits, etc. Not only would some of the food be unclean per Jewish law, but even the food they potentially could eat may have not been prepared properly. They wouldn’t know what was clean and unclean.

2 . Some of the meats were probably sacrificed to the Babylonian gods making the eating of them idol worship.

But…refusing to eat the food also posed quite a big risk to the boys

Seen as an insult to the king by disobeying his direct order

Refusal could be seen as unorthodox and hinder their chances for advancement

They were probably under a lot of peer pressure, as everyone else was probably very happy to eat this food

The food would have been appealing, I’m sure they wanted to eat it

They were 900 miles from Israel, the thought probably crossed their mind that nobody would know

They had just been forcibly removed from their homes, it would have been natural to be a little bitter toward God and start to think that maybe they didn’t have to follow God’s laws anymore

Does this ring any bells for anyone?

Have you been tempted with something that seems amazing, but you know is wrong?

I ran into this all the time at Trane when I was a sales leader. Venders would send gifts in the mail or invite me to go with them to events, but Trane had a policy we couldn’t accept anything above $50. I had to very awkwardly send quite a few gifts back to companies or decline invitations. It never went well. They didn’t understand and often they were insulted.

Daniel, being the leader of the group, and not willing to bend to temptation stepped up with a plan.

Daniel 1:8–10 NIV

But Daniel resolved not to defile himself with the royal food and wine, and he asked the chief official for permission not to defile himself this way. Now God had caused the official to show favor and compassion to Daniel, but the official told Daniel, “I am afraid of my lord the king, who has assigned your food and drink. Why should he see you looking worse than the other young men your age? The king would then have my head because of you.”

Daniel’s plan was good. He went to the official and asked for an exception so he could still follow the Jewish laws and eat only ceremonially clean food. But he was told “no”.

Have you been there?

Have you tried to do the right thing and been abruptly cut off and refused?

How did you react?

Daniel, didn’t react as maybe I would have (with frustration), Daniel responded gently.

Daniel responded as we’re all called to respond when life’s challenged come our way...with gentleness

Gentleness defined as...

Gentleness

Having an inner grace that accepts life’s challenges without complaint

Yet, even though Daniel responded to the chief officials refusal with gentleness, he didn’t compromise. He continued to search for a solution.

Daniel 1:11–16 NIV

Daniel then said to the guard whom the chief official had appointed over Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael and Azariah, “Please test your servants for ten days: Give us nothing but vegetables to eat and water to drink. Then compare our appearance with that of the young men who eat the royal food, and treat your servants in accordance with what you see.” So he agreed to this and tested them for ten days. At the end of the ten days they looked healthier and better nourished than any of the young men who ate the royal food. So the guard took away their choice food and the wine they were to drink and gave them vegetables instead.

Daniel proposed a test to allow the four Israelite boys to follow the law, but also allow the Babylonian guards some shielding from their feared consequences.

Truth: Gentleness bring people together.

And in my opinion this plan required a huge amount of self-control. They were offered the best food in the country and he asked to eat only vegetables and water.

[picture of Daniel at table with vegetables]

To make the point, here is a side by side comparison of the temptation Daniel faced.

[picture of kings table next to Daniel’s table]

And God honored their self-control.

Daniel 1:17–20 NIV

To these four young men God gave knowledge and understanding of all kinds of literature and learning. And Daniel could understand visions and dreams of all kinds. At the end of the time set by the king to bring them into his service, the chief official presented them to Nebuchadnezzar. The king talked with them, and he found none equal to Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael and Azariah; so they entered the king’s service. In every matter of wisdom and understanding about which the king questioned them, he found them ten times better than all the magicians and enchanters in his whole kingdom.

Daniel and his friends controlled their desires, refused life’s temptations, and handled the challenges they faced with gentleness.

But...They continued to be tested.

Fiery Furnace

A while later, King Nebuchadnezzar made a golden statue of himself 60 cubits high.

Just for scale a cubit = 18” (elbow to finger tips), so this statue was 90 feet tall. This was huge.

He also passed a law that anytime anyone hears sound from a horn, flute, zither, lyre, or harp everyone must fall down and worship the statue.

Anyone that doesn’t will be thrown into a blazing furnace.

When the music played, the Israelite boys (now men) had a choice.

What was their lives worth? Would they obey they law. This is literally the first two commandments being broken

Exodus 20:3 NIV

“You shall have no other gods before me.

Exodus 20:4 NIV

“You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below.

Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego showed a lot of self-control, refused to bow to the statue, and were brought before the king. Who was not very happy...

Daniel 3:13–15 NIV

Furious with rage, Nebuchadnezzar summoned Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. So these men were brought before the king, and Nebuchadnezzar said to them, “Is it true, Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, that you do not serve my gods or worship the image of gold I have set up? Now when you hear the sound of the horn, flute, zither, lyre, harp, pipe and all kinds of music, if you are ready to fall down and worship the image I made, very good. But if you do not worship it, you will be thrown immediately into a blazing furnace. Then what god will be able to rescue you from my hand?”

Yet, like Daniel, their response was measured, gentle.

Daniel 3:16–18 NIV

Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to him, “King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.”

The king did throw them into the fire.

They had no idea if God would save them.

The reality is, God does allow suffering. God does allow people to exercise their free will and sometimes that free will hurts people.

God can stop it, but in many cases, for reasons we don’t understand, He does not.

But, in this case God did save them. And because God saved them from death in the fire, King Nebuchadnezzar made the worship of God legal.

Daniel 3:28–30 NIV

Then Nebuchadnezzar said, “Praise be to the God of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, who has sent his angel and rescued his servants! They trusted in him and defied the king’s command and were willing to give up their lives rather than serve or worship any god except their own God. Therefore I decree that the people of any nation or language who say anything against the God of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego be cut into pieces and their houses be turned into piles of rubble, for no other god can save in this way.” Then the king promoted Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego in the province of Babylon.

What are you willing to give up because of your faith?

When your feet are truly to the fire, do you respond with gentleness, controlling yourself and your responses, standing firm to your values, or do you cave in fear?

How does God want to use you to soften other’s hearts to faith in Him?

Lion’s Pit

But Daniel had one more test...

Because of the knowledge and understanding God had given Daniel, King Darius planned to place Daniel in charge of the entire kingdom.

Daniel 6:1–3 NIV

It pleased Darius to appoint 120 satraps to rule throughout the kingdom, with three administrators over them, one of whom was Daniel. The satraps were made accountable to them so that the king might not suffer loss. Now Daniel so distinguished himself among the administrators and the satraps by his exceptional qualities that the king planned to set him over the whole kingdom.

As you can imagine this did not go over well with anyone, and many became jealous of Daniel. And that jealousy turned into a plan to get Daniel removed from his position.

Daniel 6:6–9 NIV

So these administrators and satraps went as a group to the king and said: “May King Darius live forever! The royal administrators, prefects, satraps, advisers and governors have all agreed that the king should issue an edict and enforce the decree that anyone who prays to any god or human being during the next thirty days, except to you, Your Majesty, shall be thrown into the lions’ den. Now, Your Majesty, issue the decree and put it in writing so that it cannot be altered—in accordance with the law of the Medes and Persians, which cannot be repealed.” So King Darius put the decree in writing.

This created a huge problem for Daniel, as he had developed the habit of praying to God 3x per day. He did so very publicly from the window of his apartment.

Daniel now had a choice to make. Should he continue to worship and pray to God as he’s always done, or bend to the new law.

Daniel was a man of courage and conviction.

Daniel believed his relationship with God was more important than obeying the new law, even if that meant death.

Daniel believed in obeying God’s law first, man’s law second.

So...Daniel continued to pray 3x a day from his window for all to see.

Daniel 6:10–12 NIV

Now when Daniel learned that the decree had been published, he went home to his upstairs room where the windows opened toward Jerusalem. Three times a day he got down on his knees and prayed, giving thanks to his God, just as he had done before. Then these men went as a group and found Daniel praying and asking God for help. So they went to the king and spoke to him about his royal decree: “Did you not publish a decree that during the next thirty days anyone who prays to any god or human being except to you, Your Majesty, would be thrown into the lions’ den?” The king answered, “The decree stands—in accordance with the law of the Medes and Persians, which cannot be repealed.”

Daniel stayed true to his values. He showed incredible self-control and continued to pray to and worship God despite the risks.

When King Darius found out the entire situation was a trap, he felt bad, but could not change the law. King Darius even spent the night fasting and couldn’t sleep because he felt so bad for throwing Daniel into the lion’s den.

But, God kept the mouths of the lions shut and Daniel survived.

And because of Daniel’s actions, King Darius issued a decree that everyone in his kingdom should fear and revere the God of Daniel.

Daniel 6:26–27 NIV

“I issue a decree that in every part of my kingdom people must fear and reverence the God of Daniel. “For he is the living God and he endures forever; his kingdom will not be destroyed, his dominion will never end. He rescues and he saves; he performs signs and wonders in the heavens and on the earth. He has rescued Daniel from the power of the lions.”

Daniel was saved

And...his controlled response, boldly living out his values, drove an entire nation toward God.

How can God use your controlled responses to bring others into a life saving relationship with Him?

YOU - Takeaway

Do you want the self-control of Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego?

Do you want to be able to respond with gentleness when faced with incredibly stressful situations?

Like me, do you struggle to figure out how to do that?

Let’s go back to the Stoic Philosophy of the Greeks.

They believed that we need to learn how to do three things to gain self-control

1. Control our mental narratives

They believed that we aren’t upset by the events that happen to us, we are upset by how we interpret those events

So to gain self-control in our lives, we need to learn to interpret the events in our lives in a manner that honors God.

Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego interpreted the events in their lives through the lens of an opportunity to honor God and build His kingdom. We need to do the same.

2. Be purposeful; make decisions based on values

In our current culture we’re taught to make decisions based on our feelings, which regularly gets us in trouble.

We need to base our decisions on our values, hopefully the Godly values taught in the Bible

3. Accept and embrace challenges

We need to start viewing challenges as opportunities to build character and live out our values

The Stoics believed to learn to do this, we need to practice voluntary discomfort, subjecting ourselves to small hardships regularly (cold showers, exercise, fasting, etc)

And I think we all need to remember...

Remember, this is a process. To get better at this, you have to work at it. You have to accept that you will fail at times. But if you persevere, you will get better, the failures will get farther and farther apart, and you will gain the ability to remain in control of yourself, even during the most stressful situations.

WE / JESUS - Redemptive Close - Call to Action

This is easy to say. Have self-control, and be gentle when exercising it.

But the reality is, we cannot just say “no” to every temptation that comes our way.

If you’ve tried to stop a bad habit cold turkey, you know it is nearly impossible.

Thomas Chalmers describes this dilemma as follows:

Thomas Chalmers

“We only cease to be a slave of one appetite because another has brought it into subordination. A youth might cease to idolize sensual pleasure and partying around, but it’s only because the idol of material gain and career success has gotten the ascendency. There is not one personal transformation in which the heart is left without an ultimate object of beauty and joy. Its desire for one particular object may be conquered, but its desire to have some object is unconquerable. The only way to dispossess the heart of an old affection is by the expulsive power of a new one”

To truly gain freedom from temptations, to get mastery of self, to practice self-control...

...we need to want a relationship with Jesus more than whatever temptation we’re facing.

Jesus tell us this directly.

Matthew 16:24–25 NIV

Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.

Matthew 6:33 NIV

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

Paul tells us how he learned to live this out.

Philippians 3:7–8 NIV

But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ

To live the “Christian” life we’re called to live, we need to want and seek a relationship with Jesus more than we want anything else.

By ourselves, through our own strength, we are not enough. We cannot live the life we were created to live.

We need Jesus in our lives.

We need power of the Holy Spirit working in and through us.

We need to be connected to vine if we’re going to bear any fruit, let alone the good fruit we’re called to produce.

This is Jesus talking...

John 15:1–8 NIV

“I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.

If we take nothing else from this entire series, I hope we remember this point.

To be the people we were created to be, we need to be connected to Jesus, seeking a relationship with Him before anything else. We need the power of the Holy Spirit working in and through us, aligning our values with God’s values, and directing our actions and choices with God’s priorities.

Because...

A Christian is...Gentle, trusting God’s plan and handling life’s challenges without complaint.

A Christian is...Controlled, acting based on Christian values, controlling our feelings, and choosing a relationship with Jesus above any temptation that we face.

PRAYER 

Will you join me in prayer...

SONG 

As we enter into our final song, I want to open the steps up front as an altar to anyone who needs God this week. The steps are open for you to pray to the God who is with you, who loves you, you wants to give you His peace.

‌

You may feel a hand on your shoulder as I or one of the elders join you in prayer.

BENEDICTION 

Titus 2:11–12 NIV

For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age,

This week...

Let’s not believe culture, that our value is found in fame, money, and power.

Let’s not give in to every temptation, doing what’s easy, and chasing our next dopamine hit.

But let’s follow the guidance of Solomon and the Stoics, living a life of self-control, delaying gratification, and making decisions based on how potential actions align with the Biblical values we believe in.

And when life pushes back, let’s be gentle in our response, trusting in God’s plan and responding without complaint.

And above all, let’s seek after a relationship with Jesus before anything else in our lives.

Quick reminder...

Rebooted Wednesday Bible Study - “Going Deeper”

Family “5th” Sunday next week - Students are leading worship - Potluck (breakfast) after

New series starting after Labor Day on September 7th. We’ll go through our mission / vision / values, who we are as a church, how our church fits into the larger global church, and how we’ve called to serve the community God has placed us in. This is a great opportunity to invite anyone you know who doesn’t have a church home.

If you’re new, please stop by our info desk, or see me. We’d love to say “hi” and get you know you a bit better.

I hope you have a great week.

Go in peace.

You are dismissed.

DISCIPLESHIP QUESTIONS (download into APP)

How can we cultivate a spirit of gentleness in our daily interactions with others?

In what areas of your life do you feel the need for greater self-control?

How can we shift our focus from societal expectations of success to biblical values?

What does it mean to truly be 'connected to the vine' in your daily life?

How can the stories of Daniel and his friends inspire us to stand firm in our faith amid temptation?

What practical steps can you take to avoid comparing yourself to others?

How can you respond with gentleness in a heated situation among friends?

In what ways can you practice self-control at school or with friends?

How can the lessons from Daniel influence your decisions in peer pressure situations?

What does it look like to prioritize your relationship with Jesus over social media or popularity?