The Tragedy of Death

Obituary

On Thursday, August 14, 2025, Barbara Leslie, a loving mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother, passed away peacefully at the age of 89. During the last days of her life, she longed for heaven, and her family finds peace in knowing she is now rejoicing in the presence of Jesus. Barbara was born on December 3, 1935, in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, to John and Verna Bencina, who preceded her in death. She was also preceded in death by her beloved husband of 69 years, Donald Leslie; her brother, Jim (Barb) Bencina; and her sister, Judy (Allyn) Burroughs. She is survived by her children, Scott Leslie and Kim (Jeffrey) Anderson; her grandchildren, Alexandra Leslie, Blake Leslie, Marques (Dana) Koller, Tyler (Amanda) Koller, Nicole (Steven) Eagan, Sarah (Drew) Witlacil, Emily Koller, and Zachary Anderson; and her great-grandchildren, Isaiah Lopez, Braelon Eagan, and Hadley Eagan. She is also survived by her sister, Mary Felton; her sisters-in-law, Faye Story and Jean Leslie; and many beloved nieces and nephews. Barbara and Donald shared a beautiful life together, raising two children, welcoming eight grandchildren, and celebrating the arrival of three great-grandchildren. She deeply loved her family and cherished every moment spent with them. Barbara was a woman of many talents and passions. She was an avid bowler, a gifted cook who loved trying new recipes, and a creative who explored cake decorating, sewing, crocheting, needlepoint, and many other crafts. She especially loved decorating her home, always bringing warmth and beauty to her surroundings. She made friends wherever she went, spreading warmth, kindness, and joy to all who knew her. She will be remembered for her kind heart, her creativity, her love for people, and most of all, her devotion to her family. She will be deeply missed and forever treasured.

The Nature of Tragedy

Death Hurts

We can’t talk to her

We can’t laugh with her

We can’t make memories with her

We can’t understand

We don’t understand death

Is there a purpose?

What is the purpose?

Couldn’t there be an easier way?

There isn’t an easy answer

We just don’t know why

Even if we did know why, we would still hurt

Grief over death is normal and even good

When grief is at its most intense we just want it to stop, but it is good to feel grief

Grief acknowledges our loss

Grief accepts that tragedy has occurred 

Grief acknowledges that the world is not what it should be

The Bible records many instances of grief

2 Sam. 18:33  And the king was deeply moved and went up to the chamber over the gate and wept. And as he went, he said, “O my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom! Would I had died instead of you, O Absalom, my son, my son!”

Job 1:20 Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head and fell on the ground and worshiped. 21 And he said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” 22 In all this Job did not sin or charge God with wrong. 

Jn. 11

Even though it is good to grieve because of loss, we are right to look for comfort and must move through the process of grief

Finding Meaning

If we are ever going to find meaning in this tragedy, we must look to God

It is normal for us to ask God why he would do something like this because we simply don’t have the answer.

Every answer I can suggest will fall short of satisfying the longing in your heart.

Instead of providing an answer, let’s look at another tragic death.

The Most Tragic Death

John 3:16–18 NIV

16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. 18 Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son.

The basis of Jesus’s death was the Father’s love

We like to make Jesus the warm fuzzy member of the trinity

In reality, it was God the father who commissioned Jesus to die

Because of God’s love, he gave his son, knowing that Jesus’s death would be the result

Jesus’s death was completely undeserved

As much as you love Barbara, it won’t take long for you to remember times when she wasn’t perfect. She was human after all.

Jesus was perfect.

Jesus death was for sinners

He did not come to condemn the world, but so that, through him, the world would be saved.

Through Jesus God provided salvation to all those who would believe.

Romans 3 calls Jesus just and justifier

He showed God’s righteousness by facing judgement

He showed God’s love by facing judgement for us

Jesus death was the death of death itself

1 Corinthians 15:54–57 NIV

54 When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: “Death has been swallowed up in victory.” 55 “Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?” 56 The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. 57 But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.

The Tragedy of Jesus Death and the Tragedy of Barbara’s Death

Like I said before, I cannot give you a reason for Barbara’s death.

All I can do is tell you that God loves you enough to send Jesus to die for you

If God is willing to suffer loss in the same way you are suffering today, you can trust that, even though you don’t know why or how, even as you feel the sadness of losing your beloved Calvin, God is good.

That means that Calvin’s death has meaning and significance, even though you might not know why.

Be comforted by this.

Mt 6:9 Our Father in heaven,

hallowed be your name,

10 your kingdom come,

your will be done,

on earth as it is in heaven.

11 Give us today our daily bread.

12 And forgive us our debts,

as we also have forgiven our debtors.

13 And lead us not into temptation,

but deliver us from the evil one.’