Honor Your Parents

Be Delivered 4. A Life of Responsibility (Ex. 20:1–17)

In a world that worships and imitates youth and uses “assisted suicide” (euthanasia) to eliminate unwanted old people, this commandment sounds like an echo from a time warp.

But we are taught to respect and care for our parents and seniors.

It begins the second set of instructions in Exodus 20 which are focused on godly living.

While the first four commandments focus on our relationship with God Himself, the last six are designed to protect and enhance our relationship with each other.

This is called the “first commandment with promise”.

Ephesians 6:2

Ephesians 6:2 NKJV

“Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise:

Among all human relationships, the family is primary. Marriage and family was the first institution created by God.

Genesis 1:26-28

Genesis 1:26–28 NKJV

Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”

Genesis 2:21-25

Genesis 2:21–25 NKJV

And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

Government and nationality have their place in our relationships with each other, but the home is our basic training station.

Genesis 18:19

Genesis 18:19 NKJV

For I have known him, in order that he may command his children and his household after him, that they keep the way of the Lord, to do righteousness and justice, that the Lord may bring to Abraham what He has spoken to him.”

Ephesians 6:4

Ephesians 6:4 NKJV

And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.

The home is the place to exercise the discipline that will instill respect for authority.

Hebrews 12:7-9

Hebrews 12:7–9 NKJV

If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten? But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons. Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live?

Such discipline may involve corporal punishment or verbal rebuke.

Proverbs 22:15

Proverbs 22:15 NKJV

Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of correction will drive it far from him.

Proverbs 23:13-14

Proverbs 23:13–14 NKJV

Do not withhold correction from a child, For if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. You shall beat him with a rod, And deliver his soul from hell.

We live in a world that is short on discipline, I’ve seen the results of it many times in my work.

Government struggles and society suffers when homes are negligent in establishing obedience to rules.

The promise of a long life is based upon the child obeying his parents and helping his parents as they require care or assistance in their later years.

Since Jesus lived a sinless life (Hebrews 4:15), it would follow that He upheld this commandment and honored His earthly parents just as He honored His heavenly Father.

Obedience is one component of honoring parents, but there is more to it.

It also means to respect and love your parents.

To do this brings blessing. God has attached a promise to the commandment.

The promise of a long life in the land refers primarily to the land of Canaan and the people of Israel.

Deuteronomy 32:46-47

Deuteronomy 32:46–47 NKJV

and he said to them: “Set your hearts on all the words which I testify among you today, which you shall command your children to be careful to observe—all the words of this law. For it is not a futile thing for you, because it is your life, and by this word you shall prolong your days in the land which you cross over the Jordan to possess.”

Although this promise originally applied to the jews upon their entry into Canaan, Paul has applied it to all believers.

This promise of long life should be seen as a general principle, rather than an absolute.

For instance, if a person dies young, you can’t assume its because he dishonored his parents.

Outside factors can certainly affect a person’s longevity.

But this much is true. A child who honors and obeys his parents will avoid quite a lot of sin and danger.

*Not to mention, his parents won’t be inclined to beat him to death. (*Meant as humor)

“Life is not measured only by quantity of time. It is also measured by quality of experience. God enriches the life of the obedient child no matter how long he may live on the earth. Sin always robs us; obedience always enriches us.1”

1 Wiersbe, W. W. (1996). The Bible exposition commentary (Vol. 2, p. 53). Victor Books.

The command to honor your parents doesn’t end when you become an adult.

1 Timothy 5:4

1 Timothy 5:4 NKJV

But if any widow has children or grandchildren, let them first learn to show piety at home and to repay their parents; for this is good and acceptable before God.

Our parents are ours to honor for as long as we live.

As our parents age and need assistance, the children are the first who should provide. It is their responsibility first.

Our parents cared for and provided for us as we grew, and at some point the tables will be turned, and it’ll be our turn.

But the honor doesn’t end at the death of a parent. Even after they pass, we should still honor and respect them.

We should not disrespect them by speaking badly of them even after they’ve left this earth.

So, while we may see this commandment as applying to children, in reality it is a lifelong command.

What if these instructions were followed by all families?