Covenant & Covering Session 12

Doors That Strengthen Principalities: How Unchecked Issues Empower Strongholds in Relationships

Primary Text:

Ephesians 4:27 KJV 1900

27 Neither give place to the devil.

Introduction: When Relationships Build Altars to the Enemy

In covenant relationships—whether marriage, friendship, or spiritual partnerships—there are unseen doors that, when left open, give strength and authority to demonic strongholds. The enemy seeks to exploit relational fractures to build fortresses of division, betrayal, control, and confusion. The Bible warns us: “Give no place to the devil.” That phrase “give place” in the Greek is topos (Strong’s G5117), which means “a region, space, or opportunity.” When we harbor toxic behaviors and ungodly attitudes in our relationships, we’re not just hurting one another—we’re making room for demonic rulers to govern our homes, marriages, and ministries.

In this session, we will expose the five common doors that empower principalities in modern relationships and show how to close these access points through repentance, truth, and spiritual covering.

The Door of Unresolved Offense

Key Scripture: “A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle.” — Proverbs 18:19, KJV

What It Looks Like:

Bitterness that disguises itself as silence or sarcasm

“Cold shoulder” responses, passive-aggressive behavior

Repeating the offense to others (gossip) instead of reconciliation

Waiting for the other person to make the first move

Stronghold Activated:

This opens the door to division, a spirit that thrives in offense. Over time, offense matures into resentment, which breeds emotional distance and spiritual disconnection.

How to Close It:

Forgive quickly (Matthew 6:14–15)

Initiate reconciliation (Matthew 5:23–24)

Speak truth in love (Ephesians 4:15)

Set healthy boundaries but don’t build walls

The Door of Hidden Pride

Key Scripture: “Only by pride cometh contention: but with the well advised is wisdom.” — Proverbs 13:10, KJV

What It Looks Like:

Refusing to apologize even when wrong

Needing to “win” every argument

Viewing correction as an attack instead of protection

Always blaming the other person

Stronghold Activated:

Pride builds the stronghold of control and fuels a Jezebel-like spirit in relationships (1 Kings 21:25). This spirit undermines mutual submission and destroys unity.

How to Close It:

Humble yourself (1 Peter 5:6)

Confess faults one to another (James 5:16)

Seek wise counsel (Proverbs 11:14)

Honor the other’s perspective

The Door of Sexual Defilement

Key Scripture: “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.” — 1 Corinthians 6:18, KJV

What It Looks Like:

Engaging in sex outside of covenant (fornication, adultery)

Pornography and secret addictions

Withholding intimacy in marriage to manipulate

Comparing spouse or partner to others

Stronghold Activated:

These behaviors empower the spirit of lust and deception. It blinds discernment, erodes trust, and forms ungodly soul ties that keep people bound to past partners and experiences.

How to Close It:

Break soul ties in prayer (2 Corinthians 6:17)

Walk in the Spirit to crucify the flesh (Galatians 5:16)

Repent of sexual sins and renounce spiritual partners

Invite accountability and restore purity

The Door of Manipulation and Control

Key Scripture: “Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.” — Philippians 2:3, KJV

What It Looks Like:

Using guilt or silence to control decisions

Overreaching authority and silencing the other’s voice

Constant criticism or demeaning speech

Using “God told me” as a spiritual weapon

Stronghold Activated:

This invites the Leviathan spirit—a twisting serpent (Job 41)—that distorts communication and inflates ego. It leads to confusion, misinterpretation, and rebellion in relationships.

How to Close It:

Submit one to another (Ephesians 5:21)

Learn healthy communication patterns

Remove hidden motives and manipulation

Let go of control and trust God with the outcome

The Door of Secrecy and Silence

Key Scripture: “He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy.” — Proverbs 28:13, KJV

What It Looks Like:

Withholding emotions or truths “to keep peace”

Hiding financial decisions or phone activity

Unspoken resentment or inner vows (“I’ll never trust them again”)

Presenting a perfect image to others while struggling in private

Stronghold Activated:

This opens the door to deception and double-mindedness, a playground for the accuser (Revelation 12:10). Secrecy breaks trust and breeds suspicion, which destroys covenant.

How to Close It:

Walk in the light (1 John 1:7)

Create safe spaces for transparency

Practice confession and vulnerability

Don’t just communicate—connect

Recognizing the Cycle: How These Doors Feed Each Other

These doors are not isolated; they create a spiritual ecosystem where the demonic can thrive:

Offense leads to silence,

Silence fuels pride,

Pride enables control,

Control hides lust,

Lust births more secrecy,

And the cycle repeats.

Like vines growing on an unguarded wall, these strongholds wrap themselves around relationships until they choke out life. This is why covering and covenant must be rooted in truth, humility, repentance, and accountability.

How to Overcome These Principalities

Daily Spiritual Inventory

Ask: “Have I opened any of these doors?”

Invite the Holy Spirit to examine your heart (Psalm 139:23–24)

Invite Godly Counsel

Let trusted spiritual leaders and friends speak into your blind spots

Establish a Culture of Covenant

Make relationships a safe space for growth, correction, and grace

Rebuke Strongholds, Not People

Our war is not against flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12)

Pray for your covenant partner, not just about them

Guard the Gate Together

Covenant relationships are strongest when both parties discern spiritual breaches and work as a team to close them

Final Reflection

If the devil can’t destroy a person, he’ll aim to destroy the covenant they’re in. Relationships are battlegrounds of spiritual inheritance. Satan knows that two in agreement can shake kingdoms (Matthew 18:19), so he will do everything to plant suspicion, offense, and manipulation to stop that unity.

God’s design for covenant is powerful: it is a picture of Christ and the Church. Let us not empower the enemy to build strongholds where God intended to build sanctuaries.

“The devil doesn’t need a throne in your house if you’ve already given him a chair at your table.”— Robert Young

Suggested Scriptures for Personal Meditation:

James 4:7 – “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”

Colossians 3:12–14 – The character of covenant love

2 Corinthians 10:4–5 – Pulling down strongholds

Matthew 5:9 – “Blessed are the peacemakers…”

Romans 12:18 – “As much as lieth in you, live peaceably…”