I Forgive-Matthew 18:21-35
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Botham Jean
Botham Jean
Brandt recalled, “pretty much this entire year, I pretty much … hated her.”
“I used to talk to my friends about wanting to kill her and stuff.”
“Gradually, throughout this year, I worked on myself and I understood that this anger shouldn’t be kept inside me,” he told CNN.
His willingness to forgive Guyger will help him apply that spirit of forgiveness to other parts of his life, he said.
“I usually tell myself if I could forgive her then, I could forgive anyone for anything,” he said. Botham’s death and the trial hasn’t changed him, he said.
“It’s just forced me to improve my humility and freed me from anxiety.”
What the world says
What the world says
“I would be rolling in my grave if my brother went on stand and wished that my murderer didn’t go to prison”
“My people are too **** forgiving. This is too difficult to watch.”
“That man is dead! His family is a disgrace hugging his murderer! Easy to forgive when its not your life cut short! Im Sure Botham don't forgive her. y'all people crazy! The power of forgiveness won't bring that man back but a Life sentence wud def have been an eye for an eye.”
“Can I hug her?"...*snaps her neck”
“When a black man sees Becky's hair, he immediately forgot why he is in court room.”
Matthew 18: Repentance and Forgiveness
Matthew 18: Repentance and Forgiveness
Woe to temptation—Matthew 18:7-9
Parable of the Lost Sheep—Matthew 18:10-14
If your brother sins against you—Matthew 18:15-20
Parable of the Unforgiving Servant—Matthew 18:21-35
21 Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?”
22 Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.
A Master that Forgives
A Master that Forgives
23 “Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants.
24 When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents.
25 And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made.
26 So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.’
27 And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt.
Jesus tells us this kingdom parable, a parable that tells us some truth of how God and his kingdom will and does function. In this kingdom there are 4 characters/groups to keep in mind:
The Master—God
Forgiven Servant—Us
Unforgiven Servant—Someone who has done us wrong
Observant Servants—God’s Omniscience
The parable begins with a master with a servant who owes an exorbitant amount of money, 10,000 talents. A talent was worth about 20 years worth of wages. So, in total about 20,000 years worth of wages. 10,000 talents ≈ $16,122,000,000
The actual dollar amount is not even that significant in this story. The number Jesus chose is the highest base number in Aramaic, to show how exorbitant an amount it is.
The truth is, the servant had an amount he could never pay in his entire life. Making one denarius a day it would take millions of lifetimes to pay it off.
The master is ready to settle the accounts, the servant couldn’t pay so his life was the payment. Despite all this, the servant begs for patience to pay it all back. This is where we fall with our sins. We have collected this debt and one day the master is going to come collect. We will never be able to pay it back.
The master shows pity. He knows the servant could never pay the amount back so he shows forgiveness for something he will never recoup. As Christians our lives turn out the same way. When we become a Christian, our debts are taken away since we could never repay them with anything other than our lives.
A Servant That Wouldn’t
A Servant That Wouldn’t
28 But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, and seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, ‘Pay what you owe.’
29 So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you.’
30 He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt.
This servant has completely forgotten the mercy that he was just shone! Lets look at the timeline:
He owed 10,000 talents
He could not pay the debt
The master forgave the debt
Another servant owed 100 denarii
This servant could not pay the debt
This servant was thrown in jail
Do you see the parallels and the split from the pattern? The master showed mercy, the servant showed vengeance.
See the parallels of our sins and the debts owed.
10,000 talents = Our sins towards God
100 denarii = our sins towards each other
One is an unpayable and basically unforgivable debt, the other is an easily payable and easily forgivable debt. My debt against the father is so great that it will never be paid back and the sins that have been done to me are so minuscule, can’t I just forgive them?
Why should our debts to us be of greater importance than our debts to others?
A Master Who Returned the Standard
A Master Who Returned the Standard
30 He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt.
31 When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their master all that had taken place.
32 Then his master summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me.
33 And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?’
34 And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt.
35 So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.”
The master sees the lack of forgiveness and returns that standard to the original servant. Some might say that is unfair, but it is just.
The servant had every right to throw his fellow servant in jail but when shown forgiveness from someone higher than him for an amount higher than was owed to him, that servant should have shown forgiveness as well!
Look in Matthew 18:34. The master threw this “wicked” servant in jail until he could repay the debt, which we have said is impossible.
34 And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt.
Notice what Jesus then says concerning the Father Matthew 18:35
35 So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.”
What Can We Learn?
What Can We Learn?
Forgiveness is expected
Forgiveness is expected
The Father has shown all of us Christians forgiveness and he expects us to do the same. None of us that have tasted the goodness of God have a right to hold anything against anyone in the pursuit of self justice, vengeance.
Colossians 3:12-13—When we read this passage it stands in opposition of the previous verses which are earthly things. Part of putting on Christ, seeking the things that are above, and doing everything in the name of the Lord means providing forgiveness to others.
12 Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience,
13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.
Mark 11:25—Part of our prayer life is the forgiveness of others. These words would be repeated in Matthew 6 saying that if we forgive others their trespasses then God will forgive us. If we do not forgive, our prayers are hindered.
25 And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”
It is not an option to just “not forgive” someone. It is the expectation of our Lord as people that have received mercy to show mercy to one another.
Forgiveness is vital to our lives as Christians
To not forgive others, especially a brother or sister, shows our lack of love
If you have tasted the goodness of God, why would you not share it?
Forgive To Bring Someone Back
Forgive To Bring Someone Back
Some believe that forgiveness is just for the forgiver, which there is a lot of benefit there, but the entire purpose is to bring the sinner back from sin!
The master had a servant who was in debt and was prepared to be sold off. The master’s forgiveness restores the servant back to the master as one who had never taken the debt.
Matthew 18:15-17—The church discipline passage is about bringing our erring brothers back home. It is predicated on forgiveness
15 “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.
16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses.
17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.
James 5:19-20—While this verse is not necessarily about us forgiving others, forgiveness is built in to restoration, whether to us or to God.
19 My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back,
20 let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.
Seek restoration and reconciliation
Every soul is worth the effort to bring them to repentance
If we were the one doing the wrong, we would beg the same
Our Standard Is Not Better
Our Standard Is Not Better
Occasionally we will apply our own standard of forgiveness. We will put conditions. We will withhold. We are not God.
We will withhold forgiveness and use boundaries as an excuse. Boundaries are for preventing sin, not giving forgiveness.
Matthew 6:14-15—The standard was set in the Lord’s model prayer with “Forgive our debts as we forgive our debtors.” After concluding the prayer, Jesus then gives this verse as a stark warning to the people.
14 For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you,
15 but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
Luke 6:37-38—The Lord is serious about how we give and what we get in return. He is a fair and just God, and has deemed it worthy to say that whatever standard we use, He will use on us. Don’t you think it is better to use the Lord’s standard than ours?
37 “Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven;
38 give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.”
There is no standard that we as humans can create that if we were to be held to them we would not be upset. So what is the Lord’s standard of forgiveness?
Psalm 103:12—On our Earth, you can only go so far North before heading South, and vice versa. If you head East, you will always go East. If you head West, to will always go West
12 as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.
Micah 7:19—Imagine going to the Mariana trench in its pitch black depths. So much unknown, and yet that is where our sin lies
19 He will again have compassion on us; he will tread our iniquities underfoot. You will cast all our sins into the depths of the sea.
Forgiveness is about separating the sin from the individual
When the Lord forgives, He no longer has even the thought of our transgressions
Forgiveness means never keeping a record of wrongdoing
