GOSPEL OF MATTHEW - THE CROWN AND THE COST

MATTHEW 10:34-42

Last week we looked at fearless witness and living boldly for Christ and that in following Him means we embrace courage, trust Holy Spirit, and boldly proclaim His truth. And while the world may oppose us, we are not alone – His Spirit is in us and with us, His eye is on us and His mission is before us.  We are to fear God and not man and in doing so, we can live boldly for Christ!

This week we finish up chapter 10 in Matthew.  So as we being, let us pray!

“The Cost and the Crown”

Matthew 10:34–42 – “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household. Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. “Whoever receives you receives me, and whoever receives me receives him who sent me. The one who receives a prophet because he is a prophet will receive a prophet’s reward, and the one who receives a righteous person because he is a righteous person will receive a righteous person’s reward. And whoever gives one of these little ones even a cup of cold water because he is a disciple, truly, I say to you, he will by no means lose his reward.

Big Idea:

True discipleship isn’t about comfort—it’s about commitment. Jesus calls us to radical allegiance, sacrificial love, and eternal reward.

Point 1: Jesus Divides Before He Unites

Matthew 10:34–36

“Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword…” man vs dad, daughter vs mother, enemies will come from within the household…

Counter-Cultural Illustration:

Culture says, “Keep the peace at all costs. Don’t offend anyone.” But Jesus says, “Truth is worth dividing over.” In a world obsessed with tolerance and comfort, Jesus calls us to conviction and courage—even if it costs us relationships.

Key Idea:

Jesus didn’t come to make us comfortable; He came to make us committed.  Our allegiance has to be to Him before all else.

This peace is eirene – I ray nay – peace between individuals

Peace cannot be attained by entertaining both sides (ie gender identity movement)

Peace only comes with full surrender to Heavenly Father – reconciled thru Christ to Himself

Only when reconciled to Him can we be reconciled to others –

Then we can be equipped to work for peace

Illustration:

Imagine a surgeon entering the operating room. Before healing can happen, a scalpel must first cut. The incision hurts, but it’s necessary for life. In the same way, Jesus’ truth sometimes cuts before it heals—dividing loyalties so that true devotion can grow.

Jesus quotes Micah 7:6 – the enemy will come from within

Family loyalty cannot supersede our loyalty to God – unbeliever is listed first and then the believer – (Converts in modern Africa, Middle East, SE Asia again)

Supporting Scriptures:

Luke 12:51–53 – “Do you think that I have come to give peace on earth? No, I tell you, but rather division. For from now on in one house there will be five divided, three against two and two against three...” (F v S, S v F, M v D, D v M, )

Hebrews 4:12 – “For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.”

John 7:43 – “So there was a division among the people because of him.”

Open-Ended Questions:

1. How have you experienced division because of your faith in Christ?

2. Why do you think Jesus warned His disciples about conflict rather than promising peace?

3. What does choosing Christ over comfort look like in your relationships today?

Point 2: Jesus Demands Complete Devotion

Matthew 10:37–39

“Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me… whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.”

Counter-Cultural Illustration:

Our world preaches “self-care” and “follow your heart.” Jesus calls us to deny ourselves and follow Him. The culture says fulfillment comes from putting yourself first. Christ says true fulfillment comes when you die to self.

Key Idea:

Family should never stand in the way of serving God – (dad and seminary story)

This does not mean we violate Commandment #5, go against what Paul says in

Ephesians 6:1-4 – children obey your parents, honor your mother and father

and

1 Timothy 5:8 – if anyone does not take care of their family they are worse than an unbeliever

Family just cannot supersede God’s Will and Service to God.

(expand on this - is Jesus really more important than Jesus)

Early in ministry before any predication of His death – well known cross – must be willing to sacrifice your … to follow Him

And v39 – find life will lose it – seeking popularity, propriety and success will lose it – can't take it with you – our own interests and desires before Him, will lose but when you sacrifice for Him – you gain eternity, if you lose your physical life for His sake – you will get eternal life with Him (thief on the cross, Charlie Kirk etc.)

Following Jesus means surrendering everything—He won’t compete for second place.

Illustration:

Think of an Olympic athlete. They train daily, sacrifice comfort, and often live far from family—all for a crown that fades. Discipleship requires even more devotion. Jesus isn’t asking for a part of our hearts—He’s asking for all of it. 

Discipleship is learning the ways of the master teacher and them emulating them and multiplying them – if we are true disciples of Christ – we imitate Him in our daily lives

Supporting Scriptures:

Luke 9:23–24 – “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.”

Philippians 3:7–8 – “Whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ.”

Galatians 2:20 – “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me.”

Open-Ended Questions:

1. What areas of your life do you struggle to surrender fully to Jesus?

2. How can we love our families deeply while still keeping Jesus first?

3. What “cross” is Jesus asking you to carry right now?

Point 3: Jesus Rewards Those Who Receive His Messengers

Matthew 10:40–42

“Whoever receives you receives me… and whoever gives even a cup of cold water… will by no means lose his reward.”

Counter-Cultural Illustration:

The world measures greatness by fame, wealth, or power. But in God’s Kingdom, greatness is measured by service. Culture glorifies celebrity; Jesus celebrates servanthood.

Key Idea:

Even the smallest act done in Jesus’ name carries eternal significance.

To receive, to accept Jesus and His teachings is to also receive and accept God the Father, the Holy Spirit

When we accept we receive the award associated with that prophet or that righteous man – Christ is the Son of God – eternally in God’s Presence – we receive this reward

The “he” in prophet and righteous person – the word prophet is from the word we get for pastor – one who speaks forth God’s word

Most people would not be able to hear and accept Jesus’ words in person – so when you hear and accept from one He has called, you are getting the same reward

And even not the pastor but the layperson who cares for God’s children – His reward is for everyone who accepts Him whether it is in preaching, teaching, or serving

Illustration:

During a heatwave, imagine a traveler given a cold drink by a stranger. That simple act revives hope and restores strength. Jesus reminds us that every act done for His sake—no matter how small—carries eternal value.

Supporting Scriptures:

Mark 9:41 – “Anyone who gives you a cup of water in my name… will certainly not lose their reward.”

Hebrews 6:10 – “God is not unjust; He will not forget your work and the love you have shown Him.”

Colossians 3:23–24 – “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men.”

Open-Ended Questions:

1. How does knowing Jesus values small acts of kindness change your perspective on serving others?

2. What might it look like for you to serve “in His name” this week?

3. How does generosity reflect the heart of the gospel?

Closing Idea:

The call to follow Jesus is costly—but the reward is eternal. The sword He brings cuts away false peace, the cross He gives deepens our love, and the cup He offers fills us with eternal purpose.

Final Summary:

Matthew 10:34–42 teaches that discipleship is not about avoiding conflict or finding comfort—it’s about embracing Christ’s calling:

He divides—to reveal true allegiance.

He demands—to refine our devotion.

He rewards—to remind us that nothing done for Him is ever wasted.

The cost may be high, but the crown is worth it. True peace isn’t the absence of conflict—it’s the presence of Christ in the midst of it.

Let us pray!