Grace in the Midst of Guilt

Imagine this. You are driving home after an event. You’ve had a good time. Your spirit is uplifted. It’s a little late. It’s dark outside, and you and the people you are riding with are talking about the event you are coming home from, but all of a sudden you see some flashing lights. You look up in the rearview mirror, and a police car has pulled up behind you. You’re getting pulled over. Suddenly the feelings of joy and excitement turn to dread. What did you do? What’s wrong? How much trouble am I in? You pull over and wait for the officer to come up to the window.

“Do you know why I pulled you over?” No. You don’t. Were you speeding? Did you run a red light? Did your registration tag expire? “I clocked you going 60 in a 45.” Uh oh. Were you really? How could that have happened? Were you not paying attention? You’re a pretty good driver. But the officer has evidence. You were speeding. Now you are hoping that the officer will do what?

Give you a warning.

A traffic stop is sort of like the way God reveals sin sometimes. You are going on your merry way until the siren and lights go off and God comes to you to let you know you’re in trouble.

This is what happens in the life of a king named Abimelech. After the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, Abraham left and traveled south to a place called Gerar. Abimelech was the king of Gerar, and a very familiar story unfolds. Abraham tells everyone Sarah is his sister, and Abimelech finds her attractive, so he takes her with the intent to add her to his harem, which is a collection of women the king could sleep with. The Bible speaks against this behavior for God’s children, but here it is describing what was common in cultures of the time.

The exact same thing happened in Genesis 12 when Abraham was in Egypt. But unlike the time in Genesis 12, God handled this situation differently. Since God handled the situation differently, we are going to handle the sermon differently. We will focus on Abimelech rather than Abraham. Abraham is doing the same old thing. He hasn’t learned his lesson in trusting God. But in this instance, Abimelech is innocent, but God confronts him.

Like a police officer at a traffic stop, God pulls us over to reveal we have broken thew law, and we can learn three things from this text this morning.

God reveals sin for our protection.

Often times we feel that God calls out sin in us because he delights in punishing people for breaking his commands. But as we learned last week, God’s judgment is necessary, but never without mercy. There is always an opportunity provided to do something about it. Like a parent who addresses bad behaviors in a child, it is not because the parent loves discipline, but views it as necessary to protect them from further harm.

Genesis 20:3–7 NASB95

But God came to Abimelech in a dream of the night, and said to him, “Behold, you are a dead man because of the woman whom you have taken, for she is married.” Now Abimelech had not come near her; and he said, “Lord, will You slay a nation, even though blameless? “Did he not himself say to me, ‘She is my sister’? And she herself said, ‘He is my brother.’ In the integrity of my heart and the innocence of my hands I have done this.” Then God said to him in the dream, “Yes, I know that in the integrity of your heart you have done this, and I also kept you from sinning against Me; therefore I did not let you touch her. “Now therefore, restore the man’s wife, for he is a prophet, and he will pray for you and you will live. But if you do not restore her, know that you shall surely die, you and all who are yours.”

Abimelech did not know what he had done. Based on his reaction, if he had known, he never would have done it. But God points out this sin not to chastise Abimelech, but to protect him. He had yet to touch Sarah. But look at what God said in verse six: it was he who kept him from doing so. Yes, Abimelech had done something wrong, but God prevented himself from making it worse.

I want you to remember that a sin committed in ignorance is still a sin. Abimelech didn’t know. You didn’t know you were speeding, but your ignorance of that fact doesn’t change it. That’s how facts work. The truth does not change just because we are unaware of the facts.

Christy didn’t understand that standing in the middle of the street was dangerous. Marci was in Beeville this week visiting a friend. She went to load up the car. She asked Christy to stay on the sidewalk while she got Zoe buckled into her car seat. A few seconds later, Marci looks up to see a truck has stopped in the middle of the road and Christy is no longer on the sidewalk. She had walked around to the other side of the car in preparation to get into her car seat. She didn’t know the danger she placed herself in, but it doesn’t change the fact that is was dangerous. Marci had to correct her and help her understand that Mommy’s instructions are meant to keep her safe.

Sometimes you might commit a sin in ignorance. You genuinely didn’t know that was a sin. But God bringing that to your attention is a means of protection so you don’t go further into sin. He reveals sin for our protection.

Confrontation is necessary for restoration.

In this situation, the sin committed is not done solely against oneself. This is not a situation in which Abimelech unknowingly committed a sin in the privacy of his own home while everyone else was out. He is committing a sin against himself, against Sarah, against Abraham, and against God. So when this occurs, confrontation is necessary. It is necessary for Abimelech’s relationship with God, with Sarah, with Abraham, and with himself. God calls him to do this. In verse seven, God says, “Restore her or you’re dead.” There’s a path for correction, but it involves people.

Genesis 20:8–13 NASB95

So Abimelech arose early in the morning and called all his servants and told all these things in their hearing; and the men were greatly frightened. Then Abimelech called Abraham and said to him, “What have you done to us? And how have I sinned against you, that you have brought on me and on my kingdom a great sin? You have done to me things that ought not to be done.” And Abimelech said to Abraham, “What have you encountered, that you have done this thing?” Abraham said, “Because I thought, surely there is no fear of God in this place, and they will kill me because of my wife. “Besides, she actually is my sister, the daughter of my father, but not the daughter of my mother, and she became my wife; and it came about, when God caused me to wander from my father’s house, that I said to her, ‘This is the kindness which you will show to me: everywhere we go, say of me, “He is my brother.” ’ ”

When there is something that stands between you and another person, an attitude, an action, a behavior pattern, etc., and you want to have a healthy relationship with that person, confrontation over that thing is necessary. It is not optional. If you commit sins privately, then the person you have to confront is the one in the mirror. But with someone else you must wrestle with the thing that stands between you.

This week I was meeting with a client. He had finally saved enough money to replace his car and we were ready to tackle paying down his debt. He borrowed $2000 from a man who is like a grandfather figure to him. He wants to pay that back. We talked about how he is on track to do so most likely by Christmas. We talked about what that will feel like. He said there will be nothing between them except a mutual love and respect for one another. It’s been two years since he borrowed the money. Now he’s ready to get that weight off his shoulders. That’s powerful.

We must confront the thing that stands between us and someone else or it will eat at us. The only path to reconciliation is confrontation. Otherwise, the rug you are sweeping everything under will get awfully dirty.

Reconciliation is worth the price.

Many times we think about confronting an issue, there is the assumption that it is going to be bad. We think of all the reasons the outcome will be horrible. If we believe that the outcome will be horrible before we ever start, we will be right. We are almost writing the script before it happens. This is dangerous. If you tell yourself that confronting something will be disastrous, then it is, then all you did was meet expectations. But when confrontation is done properly, it yields tremendous results.

Genesis 20:14–18 NASB95

Abimelech then took sheep and oxen and male and female servants, and gave them to Abraham, and restored his wife Sarah to him. Abimelech said, “Behold, my land is before you; settle wherever you please.” To Sarah he said, “Behold, I have given your brother a thousand pieces of silver; behold, it is your vindication before all who are with you, and before all men you are cleared.” Abraham prayed to God, and God healed Abimelech and his wife and his maids, so that they bore children. For the Lord had closed fast all the wombs of the household of Abimelech because of Sarah, Abraham’s wife.

Not only did Abimelech return Sarah to Abraham, he paid to return Sarah to Abraham! Remember, Abimelech commits a sin in ignorance because both Abraham and Sarah lied about their relationship. But a crime committed in ignorance is still a crime.

I went to jail when I was 16 for crimes I committed. One of my cell mates was in there because he was caught driving a stolen car. But he didn’t steal the car. His friend had stolen the car and let him borrow it so he could go run an errand. But it was my cell mate who got arrested. It was he who paid the price. He didn’t know, but he was still held responsible.

When you commit a crime, settling the case often requires a thing called restitution. It basically means the act of making amends. It involves the restoring of property that was lost. When I was 16, restitution meant payments totaling up to $4000 for damages caused. Abimelech hands over a ton of livestock and silver. The silver alone might be worth $25,000 in today’s dollars. The livestock and the male and female servants can’t be calculated, but we are looking at a HUGE sum of money in today’s dollars.

Abimelech does this to be at peace with Abraham, with God, and with himself. There is no price too high for a clear conscience. Yes, it is unfair that Abraham gets to lie and be financially rewarded. God will deal with Abraham. It seems unfair that Abimelech has to pay such a large sum for the thing he didn’t even know he was doing. But he does it anyway because he wants his conscience clear.

The client I told you about earlier borrowed money from a guy who probably doesn’t even miss it. It’s possible that he even forgot he lent it to him. The lender is not lying awake at night wondering when he is going to be paid back. My client is working hard to pay him back so he can stand up tall with his head held high knowing that he is a man of his word. He promised to pay it back and he will.

Enjoying the blessings of God demands we remove ourselves from the obstacles that hinder our relationship. Sometimes it is a sin you know you have committed. Other times it is a sin you committed in ignorance, and perhaps because you listened to this sermon, he is bringing something to light. Sometimes it is a sin someone has committed against you and you harbor some bitterness.

Romans 12:18 says, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.” It doesn’t matter whether you can reconcile the issue. If someone doesn’t want anything to do with you after you have made every attempt to make it right, that’s on them. But for you to be at peace with yourself and with God, there is no price too high. But if you can reconcile with someone, there is no price too high for a clear conscience.

Is there something you need to work on so you can sleep better at night? Is there a person you need to reconcile with? Is God revealing something to you now that you need to get off your chest? Don’t wait. It may cost you, but the peace that is waiting on the other side is priceless.

If you are here today and you have never known that kind of peace, let me tell you that everyone has sinned. We have all done something to offend God. The good news is he wants to reconcile with you. The bad news is it is expensive. The Bible says the wages of sin is death. But the good news is God himself paid the debt with the blood of his own son. Jesus died on a cross to pay your debt to God so you could be reconciled to him. He was buried in a tomb and raised to life three days later. Jesus defeated death so you could be reconciled to God and enjoy him forever. The Bible says if you will confess your sins and trust in Jesus as the Son of God who paid the penalty for your sins, you will be saved. Not only that, but the Spirit of God will move in and begin recovering God’s design for your life. Do you need to be reconciled today?