Man of the House
Family of Honor • Sermon • Submitted • Presented
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“Building Men Who Reflect the Father”
“Building Men Who Reflect the Father”
//INTRO
//INTRO
Goal: Create safety, clarity, and conviction.
Acknowledge that today’s word might touch some wounds — father wounds, failure, regret, absence, misunderstanding.
For the Men
For the Men
Emphasize that this message is not condemnation, but invitation — a call to come up higher and align with God’s Word.
“I’m not here to beat men down — I’m here to build them up! I am for strong men in the house and strong men in our country.”
“As goes the family, so goes the nation.
As goes the father, so goes the family.”
For the Women
For the Women
Ladies, this isn’t your day to elbow your husband — this is your day to cover him in prayer.
God wants to restore the honor, weight, and holiness of fatherhood — not to dominate, but to demonstrate His heart.
Transition: Before God ever made a nation, a church, or a covenant — He made a family.
If you missed last week, I encourage you revisit that message as we looked at the Family: the MOST important institution.
Pray
THE P’S OF PATRIARCHY
THE P’S OF PATRIARCHY
Spiritual Roles
1. PATRIARCH – The Foundation of Legacy
1. PATRIARCH – The Foundation of Legacy
A patriarch doesn’t pass down possessions, he passes down principles.
Principle
:: a fundamentally defined standard or rule of personal conduct.
:: a fundamental truth or proposition that serves as the foundation for belief or action, a comprehensive law, doctrine, or assumption.
At the core of our being is to be fruitful and multiply. It’s more than getting married and making more copies of yourself with your wife. It is developing and discipling those around you.
19 For I have chosen him, that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing righteousness and justice, so that the Lord may bring to Abraham what he has promised him.”
1 “Now this is the commandment—the statutes and the rules—that the Lord your God commanded me to teach you, that you may do them in the land to which you are going over, to possess it, 2 that you may fear the Lord your God, you and your son and your son’s son, by keeping all his statutes and his commandments, which I command you, all the days of your life, and that your days may be long.
4 One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.
Proverbs 3-4 is wisdom from a Father, at the beginning of the discourse, the Father says, Proverbs 3:1–4 “1 My son, do not forget my teaching, but let your heart keep my commandments, 2 for length of days and years of life and peace they will add to you. 3 Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck; write them on the tablet of your heart. 4 So you will find favor and good success in the sight of God and man.”
God Connection
God Connection
Matt 6.9 tells us that our Father is in Heaven.
15 For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”
Legacy isn’t what you leave to your family — it’s what you leave in them.
2. PRIEST – The Spiritual Covering
2. PRIEST – The Spiritual Covering
Before you stand in authority, kneel in humility.
A priest is a minister on behalf of a group to God.
The father should be the lead minister on behalf of his family, to God.
10 … those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.
5 ...Job would send and consecrate them, and he would rise early in the morning and offer burnt offerings according to the number of them all. For Job said, “It may be that my children have sinned, and cursed God in their hearts.” Thus Job did continually.
4 Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!
17 I love those who love me, and those who seek me diligently find me.
God Connection
God Connection
14 Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. 15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. 16 Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
Jesus, our High Priest, ministers on our behalf and we, as children, as told to approach the throne with confidence!
The role of a man cannot be fulfilled apart from intimacy with his Creator.
3. PROPHET – The Voice of Direction
3. PROPHET – The Voice of Direction
A godly man hears from God and brings alignment to his home.
Prophecy will encourage and align the one who hears it and obeys.
4 But he answered, “It is written, “ ‘Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.’ ”
4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
9 “Only take care, and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things that your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. Make them known to your children and your children’s children—
God Connection
God Connection
13 When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all the truth, for he will not speak on his own authority, but whatever he hears he will speak, and he will declare to you the things that are to come.
You don’t lead your family based on emotions — but on revelation.
Practical Roles
4. PROVIDER – The Steward of God’s Supply
4. PROVIDER – The Steward of God’s Supply
Provision isn’t only paycheck — it’s peace (stability), presence (time), and perspective (wisdom).
8 But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
8 “Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. 9 Six days you shall labor, and do all your work, 10 but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work, you, or your son, or your daughter, your male servant, or your female servant, or your livestock, or the sojourner who is within your gates.
Work Hard, Rest Faithfully. Teach your family to do the same.
Gen 2.15 - man was placed in the garden to work.
11 Whoever works his land will have plenty of bread, but he who follows worthless pursuits lacks sense.
4 A slack hand causes poverty, but the hand of the diligent makes rich.
God Connection
God Connection
19 And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.
A man provides stability, not just stuff.
5. PROTECTOR – The Guardian of What’s Sacred
5. PROTECTOR – The Guardian of What’s Sacred
A man’s silence can be as dangerous as Satan’s lies.
15 The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it.
hb. Keep means to protect
14 And I looked and arose and said to the nobles and to the officials and to the rest of the people, “Do not be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your brothers, your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your homes.”
13 Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. 14 Let all that you do be done in love.
12 Be of good courage, and let us be courageous for our people, and for the cities of our God, and may the Lord do what seems good to him.”
2 What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb? What are you doing, son of my vows? 3 Do not give your strength to women, your ways to those who destroy kings. 4 It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine, or for rulers to take strong drink, 5 lest they drink and forget what has been decreed and pervert the rights of all the afflicted. 6 Give strong drink to the one who is perishing, and wine to those in bitter distress; 7 let them drink and forget their poverty and remember their misery no more. 8 Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all who are destitute. 9 Open your mouth, judge righteously, defend the rights of the poor and needy.
give
:: to lay down, hand down, surrender
8 Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.
God Connection
God Connection
1 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. 2 I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”
Guard your home physically and spiritually — be watchful and loving.
6. PASSIONATE PURSUER – The Lover and Learner
6. PASSIONATE PURSUER – The Lover and Learner
Don’t be a passive man. Pursue the things that matter: God, Family, Fellowship
As the leader of YOUR home, no one should pursue the hearts of your family more than you.
Husband— you should be working towards your doctorate in each of your family members, especially your wife.
Hormonal Cycles— male and female hormonal cycles are very different. Knowing where you’re wife is in her journey is like having a cheat code.
7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.
19 Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.
18 Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, 19 a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.
Fathers— you should be pursuing your children’s hearts.
what’s their favorite color - today?
what is their favorite snack, song, hobby?
what are their fears?
what are their joys?
what is their favorite Bible story?
Intentionally making time to be with my kids both together and one-on-one. Taking them to run errands. Taking them on dates. Going on walks around the neighborhood. Taking their calls during the day.
God Connection
God Connection
In the parable of the Prodigal Son (The Running Father) - we see the pursuit of the Father.
20 And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him.
The man who stops pursuing God will soon stop pursuing what matters.
Personal/Relational Roles
7. PLATFORM & PROPELLER – The Model and Mobilizer
7. PLATFORM & PROPELLER – The Model and Mobilizer
The godly man doesn’t push people down — he propels them forward & up!
“More is caught than taught”
When I think about the end of my days, I pray that I will be able to see my children take off and excel beyond my greatest accomplishments. To that note, I don’t desire that my children follow in my footsteps of ministry, but that they grow into the calling and mission that God has on their lives.
As they discover their identity, mission, and calling— I will be their biggest advocate!
24 And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works,
6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.
4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
God Connection
God Connection
8 It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.”
Your platform isn’t a stage — it’s your living room.
8. PEACEMAKER – The Bridge Builder
8. PEACEMAKER – The Bridge Builder
It’s not about winning; it’s about uniting.
Peace is not brought about by shouting— hello!
1 A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.
18 And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.
18 If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.
19 So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.
God Connection
God Connection
19 For in him all the fullness of God was pleased to dwell, 20 and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether on earth or in heaven, making peace by the blood of his cross.
14 For he himself is our peace, who has made us both one and has broken down in his flesh the dividing wall of hostility
Harbor Analogy
Each member of my family is a wave, which in it’s own path is harmless.
As those wave continue to move around, they will begin to collide with one another.
I need to be the harbor that those waves can gather, calm, and find safety.
9. PURE – The Standard Bearer
9. PURE – The Standard Bearer
Purity is not weakness — it’s focus on the true source.
Living a life of mixture will produce unreliable, mixed, mutated results.
When you have the hot & cold combine to make lukewarm— you will be spit out. (Rev 3.15-16)
8 “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
3 Who shall ascend the hill of the Lord? And who shall stand in his holy place? 4 He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who does not lift up his soul to what is false and does not swear deceitfully.
21 Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work. 22 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 23 Have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they breed quarrels.
9 How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to your word.
God Connection
God Connection
13 You who are of purer eyes than to see evil and cannot look at wrong, why do you idly look at traitors and remain silent when the wicked swallows up the man more righteous than he?
You can’t lead with clarity if you live with compromise.
The strength of a man isn’t in his control — it’s in the covering of his family.
The Pattern of the Patriarch
The Pattern of the Patriarch
THE BLOOD OATH COVENANT
THE BLOOD OATH COVENANT
In Genesis 15 God “cuts” covenant with Abraham.
In ancient culture, there were many covenants that would be made between unequal or equal parties.
Suzerain/Vassel = kingdoms
Blood Oath = marriage
For the Blood Oath— In ancient culture, both parties (greater & lesser) would walk through the split sacrifice — declaring, “May I be as these if I break this covenant.”
The lesser party would walk through first.
But in Genesis 15:17 — something interesting takes place…God puts Abraham into a deep sleep and only God passes through.
Meaning: God takes full responsibility for both sides of the covenant! (This is the gospel hidden in Genesis.)
It points to Jesus — God Himself fulfilling the covenant on our behalf.
13 He is clothed in a robe dipped in blood, and the name by which he is called is The Word of God.
Man’s covenant role is not perfection, but participation — walking in God’s faithfulness.
In the same way that God took the full responsibility— Men, we must rise up and take the full responsibility for our families.
if you don’t pray with your family, who will?
if you don’t lead your family in the word of God, who will?
if you don’t tell your kids their worth, who will?
if you don’t tell your wife her value, who will?
Brothers, your covenant with your family doesn’t rest on your performance — it rests on His faithfulness.
WHAT IF I DIDN’T HAVE A FATHER?
WHAT IF I DIDN’T HAVE A FATHER?
Walk through your prepared section here — compassionate and restorative.
Key truths:
Key truths:
God is Father to the fatherless (Ps. 68:5–6).
He raises fathers from among the fellowship/church (1 Cor. 4:15).
The Spirit gives sonship, not shame (Rom. 8:15).
You can learn from the Father Himself (John 5:19).
God redeems what was missing (Joel 2:25).
You are not the product of what was missing — you are the proof that God can fill the gap.
Call:
Call:
Be teachable.
Surround yourself with godly men.
Start a new chain of blessing for your family.
CLOSING & CALL TO ACTION (5–7 min)
CLOSING & CALL TO ACTION (5–7 min)
Text: Joshua 24:15
15 And if it is evil in your eyes to serve the Lord, choose this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your fathers served in the region beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”
Call:
Stand if you’re ready to align with God’s design.
Pray over the men — repentance, restoration, recommissioning.
Invite wives or families to come pray over their men — symbol of unity and honor.
Closing Line:
“The measure of a man is how clearly his family can see God through him.”
