The Impact of the Gospel on Relationships

Last week we looked at the responsibilities and the benefits of Christian relationships. This morning I want to examine the impact that the gospel has on these relationships. There are three main people discussed in these verses and their relationships are all affected by the truth of the gospel that is in each of them.

When we think of the impact of the gospel in our lives, most often we first think of ourselves as individuals and the difference that we can see. However, the impact goes far beyond just ourselves. It affects those that the Lord has placed in our path.

Read Philemon 8-16

Making an Appeal Out of Love (v. 8-9)

We first look at the relationship between Paul and Philemon and the main purpose of this letter being the appeal the comes in verse 10. Paul states that he could be bold enough in Christ to command Philemon what to do in Christ but instead does so in love. It is because there is a bond of love between these two men that he makes the appeal in this way rather than asserting his spiritual authority over this brother.

Paul had the right to make his appeal based on what needed to be done because Philemon was a man committed to living for Christ but instead takes a more gentle approach. We should be reminded when we deal with one another that sometimes, though it would be permitted, that the bold and harsh approach might not be the best way to go about things. Because both of these men were committed to following the Lord, Paul takes a softer approach and appeals out of the sake of love.

There is more that is taken into account than just love. He also makes mention of his age and the fact that he’s imprisoned. The point that I want to point out here is that there is more to consider in a situation than just whether or not an appeal or request is valid. When it is possible, we should do as 1 Corinthians 16:14 says. While it might not always be the easy thing to do, it is the right thing to do. This is the sort of impact that the gospel can have on a person, and in this case, both people.

1 Corinthians 16:14 ESV

Let all that you do be done in love.

We move from seeing the way that an appeal can be made to looking at

A Familial Bond (v. 10)

In verse 10 we see that the appeal that is being made is for Onesimus. Paul describe him as “my child” but we know that he did not literally become his father. Instead, because of an assumed shared time in prison, we can understand that the bond between these two came about because of a sharing of the gospel with this slave.

The scriptures are filled with examples of older and more mature people being given a parental role to those who are still growing in their faith. The most common example is when Paul refers to Timothy as “my true son in the faith” when he writes to him in 1 Timothy 1:2. There is a bond that is created when discipleship takes place.

1 Timothy 1:2 ESV

To Timothy, my true child in the faith: Grace, mercy, and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.

It is not just leading someone to the Lord that creates this bond, however. It is wrestling with the day to day struggles that come with following Jesus. It is reading the scriptures together and discussing them at length. It is time spent in prayer together over the heavy matters that plague our souls. So many of you have individuals in your life outside of your blood family who have poured so much into you and impacted your life that you view them as a spiritual parent.

This bond between Paul and Onesimus has much to do with why Paul is advocating on his behalf. The growth in the faith of Onesimus was an encouragement to Paul and because of that he desires to see him return to Philemon. If it had not been for the gospel, Paul would not have been near as invested in the wellbeing or spiritual progress of Onesimus. But now they have a bond that extends beyond this world. Whatever their relationship looked like previously as slave and owner, it no longer mattered because of the bond they had together in Christ.

As you consider the spiritual siblings and parents in your life, I would encourage you to thank the Lord for them. See these relationships as significant and worth pouring into regularly because of the value now and the future and not just for sentimental reasons. Think on how to make these relationships with those younger in the faith who are in need of a spiritual father or mother.

The third area of impact of the gospel we should see is

A Changed Person (v. 11)

While the first two points of impact that we’ve seen are significant, this is the one that every person in this room has experienced if they themselves have been washed by the blood of Jesus Christ. Verse 11 states that formerly Onesimus would have been useless to Philemon. Now, we know that there is no such thing as a useless human being. However, in this case it would have been difficult for the two to have had a functioning relationship because of his escape.

Yet, Paul states now that he is indeed useful. We will get to the use in the final point but I want to recognize the idea of what we read in our call to worship in Ephesians 2:1.

Ephesians 2:1 ESV

And you were dead in the trespasses and sins

Paul discusses the fact that prior to salvation, all people are dead in their trespasses. This is important to recognize that a person who is dead is of no use. They cannot do anything or accomplish anything. But because of the sacrifice of Christ, we are given purpose. When we read verse 11, there was no gospel purpose that could have been accomplished. But now, because Onesimus has been saved, there is now much use for him to Philemon. Paul goes as far as to say that he would like to keep him for his own kingdom purposes but knows that the right thing is to send him back.

If you’re here this morning and have never given your life to the Lord, I want you to consider with me the usefulness that you would have in something that is bigger than yourself. There is value beyond just what you can do for other people because the work that a disciple of Christ does is work done to benefit the kingdom of Christ.

Here we see the final point, covered in verses 12 through 16. The gospel impacts a person’s

Service to the Church (v. 12-16)

This goes far beyond just relationships that we have with other individuals. This is the sort of relationship that deeply effects the church. Philemon was not just receiving Onesimus back for the duties of a slave but now for the service of the kingdom of the church.

If you’re here this morning, because of the gospel, you have an opportunity to serve others. There are a multitude of ways that we can serve one another. For starters, your presence is of great value to those who are here. We have people serve by helping with our children's ministry. We have individuals who serve in leadership, guiding the church in deep spiritual matters. In all of these areas, it is because the gospel has had an impact on our lives.