Tamar – Righteousness in Unexpected Places

Have you ever done something that you are ashamed of?

Was there anything that you did that if anybody found out you would be unbelievably embarrassed?

Maybe you are ashamed of…

how you treated the people you’re supposed to love… an addiction that you could not shake… a grievous act that you wish you wouldn’t have done…

The truth is that living with shame is always tough but the reality is that all of us have something that we are ashamed of.

Shame can be controlling and crippling and in Genesis 38 we see some pretty raw and scandalous stuff. Yes, there is scandal in the Bible and it involves people who are part of the linage of Christ. Our text this morning contains content that is not appropriate for daytime television but it’s in the Bible.

And, since it’s in the Bible and it involves the linage of Christ, we are going to dig into it.

This Bible story has sex and prostitution and a father in law get’s his daughter-in-law pregnant and becoming her baby’s daddy to twins.

Welcome to New Life where we will talk about things in the Bible that are uncomfortable.

People like Judah and Tamar who are part of God’s Big Messy Family.

Matthew 1:1–3 NLT

1 This is a record of the ancestors of Jesus the Messiah, a descendant of David and of Abraham: 2 Abraham was the father of Isaac. Isaac was the father of Jacob. Jacob was the father of Judah and his brothers. 3 Judah was the father of Perez and Zerah (whose mother was Tamar). Perez was the father of Hezron. Hezron was the father of Ram.

PRAY

The stories of Judah and Tamar reveal God's commitment to redemption, despite human failure and betrayal. God's family includes those in society who would often be overlook or rejected in many religious circles.

But, God hand picked his family with those who made really bad decisions in life. God’s redemption gift was birthed from those who have experienced shame or scandal in their own families. That means that God can work through any situation to bring about His purposes.

Your past does not define you because your story is a part of a larger story of redemption that God is still writing.

God's sovereignty transcends human failings and societal norms. God's grace knows no bounds and that He often uses the unlikely and the imperfect to accomplish His plans.

God's promise to redeem humanity from the very start of His lineage shows that HE came for the broken, the outcast, and the marginalized.

As we look at broken people like Judah and Tamar and how these characters are included in the linage of Christ.

Aren’t you glad that God takes our scandalous stories and transforms them into testimonies of His grace and mercy? God is inviting all of us to be part of HIS redemptive narrative.

Who is Judah?

Judah is the fourth son of Jacob and Leah. Judah was one of 12 brothers and at least 1 sister from 4 different mom’s and 1 dad. They all lived together, they travelled a lot and Judah and his siblings didn’t seem to get along very well.

One day, Judah and his brother’s were jealous of their brother Joseph. Joseph was sharing his annoying dreams about him ruling over his father and his brothers. Also, his father Jacob was obviously his favorite and gave him a fancy colorful coat so the brothers plotted to kill Joseph.

Judah was the ringleader who did the humane yet profitable thing and sold his brother Joseph into slavery instead of killing him. (Gen 37:26-27)

Judah was not a very noble person. He was not a man of great character and integrity. He had some leadership qualities but he often didn’t do the right thing.

After Joseph was sold into slavery, Judah left his family and did his own thing.

Genesis 38:1–2 NLT

1 About this time, Judah left home and moved to Adullam, where he stayed with a man named Hirah. 2 There he saw a Canaanite woman, the daughter of Shua, and he married her.

Judah did not marry well.

Remember Esau… he married the Canaanite women and Jacob did not. You would think that Judah would learn from his uncle Esau but he didn’t.

Lesson to the singles… be careful who you marry because who you marry will impact your future. Just because she is pretty or he is a hottie doesn’t mean that he or she is marriage material.

Becoming a Godly man or woman will attract those who are pursuing Godliness and righteousness. When we have a stronger desire to follow Jesus then a desire to chase a man or woman we will always be content.

When we are content with loving Jesus instead of loving a mate then God will bless us with a mate when we wait on HIM.

Judah did not wait on God… he did what he wanted to do and had to learn the hard way.

But still God had a plan to used Judah…

1. Even though Scandal God’s Sovereign Plan Unfolds

Judah’s choices created a lot of unnecessary pain in Judah’s life.

Genesis 38:3–11 NLT

3 She became pregnant and gave birth to a son, and he named the boy Er. 4 Then she became pregnant again and gave birth to another son, and she named him Onan. 5 And when she gave birth to a third son, she named him Shelah. At the time of Shelah’s birth, they were living at Kezib. 6 In the course of time, Judah arranged for his firstborn son, Er, to marry a young woman named Tamar. 7 But Er was a wicked man in the Lord’s sight, so the Lord took his life. 8 Then Judah said to Er’s brother Onan, “Go and marry Tamar, as our law requires of the brother of a man who has died. You must produce an heir for your brother.” 9 But Onan was not willing to have a child who would not be his own heir. So whenever he had intercourse with his brother’s wife, he spilled the semen on the ground. This prevented her from having a child who would belong to his brother. 10 But the Lord considered it evil for Onan to deny a child to his dead brother. So the Lord took Onan’s life, too. 11 Then Judah said to Tamar, his daughter-in-law, “Go back to your parents’ home and remain a widow until my son Shelah is old enough to marry you.” (But Judah didn’t really intend to do this because he was afraid Shelah would also die, like his two brothers.) So Tamar went back to live in her father’s home.

Judah was not a good father. He was not an example of a righteous father. He was not a man with integrity. Judah wanted to do what was convenient for Judah, regardless of what was right.

God blessed Judah with 3 sons from his Canaanite wife but they were a lot like their dad. Tamar was connected to this dysfunctional family through a prearranged marriage to Er.

Er - Er was so wicked that the Lord put him to death before Tamar became pregnant.

Onan - who didn’t want to impregnate Tamar because her child would represent his older brother and be his.

This was called a Levirate Marriage.

Onan didn’t want to share his Father’s inheritance so he did not fertilize the egg.

Nobody saw Onan’s failure to complete the transaction with his sister-in-law but Tamar and the Lord… so the Lord struck Onan dead.

Shelah - who was the youngest and would have been next in line to marry Tamar but he was to young to fulfill a Levirate marriage.

Levirate Marriage - In some Ancient Near Eastern societies, including Israel, a brother-in-law’s duty to the childless widow of his brother was to marry her and have children who would then receive his brother’s share of his father’s estate. Later on this would be a part of Israelite law (Deut 25:5-10).

This was established to prevent widows from being without a covering through her offspring who would be able to take care of their mother and carry on her legacy.

In this patriarchal society, widows without a son to carry on her legacy would mean that she would be at the mercy of the community to take care of her.

But Judah was afraid to see his youngest and now only son die so he sent Tamar to live as a widow in her father’s household until Shelah was old enough to marry her. However, that was not Judah’s intention and so Tamar was going to be a widow for the rest of her life.

Judah did Tamar wrong because he was selfish and full of fear. Instead of blaming his boys for their own wickedness he blamed Tamar who suffered the consequences someone else's bad choices.

Despite moral failings, God orchestrates events in surprising ways to keep His promise of redemption alive. God is not limited by human failures but instead weaves them into His larger plan.

Don’t put a THE END on your story no matter how much wreckage there might be. Trust in God’s sovereign plan because it’s in the wreckage that we see that it’s all a part of God's greater narrative.

2. God uses our Wreckage to Surprise us with Redemption

Tamar’s father-in-law sent her away in order to protect himself and his family.

She was the victim of an arranged marriage to a bad person, the loss of her husband, the loss of her brother-in-law, and now Judah sent her back to her family as a hopeless and helpless widow.

Genesis 38:12–19 NLT

12 Some years later Judah’s wife died. After the time of mourning was over, Judah and his friend Hirah the Adullamite went up to Timnah to supervise the shearing of his sheep. 13 Someone told Tamar, “Look, your father-in-law is going up to Timnah to shear his sheep.” 14 Tamar was aware that Shelah had grown up, but no arrangements had been made for her to come and marry him. So she changed out of her widow’s clothing and covered herself with a veil to disguise herself. Then she sat beside the road at the entrance to the village of Enaim, which is on the road to Timnah. 15 Judah noticed her and thought she was a prostitute, since she had covered her face. 16 So he stopped and propositioned her. “Let me have sex with you,” he said, not realizing that she was his own daughter-in-law. “How much will you pay to have sex with me?” Tamar asked. 17 “I’ll send you a young goat from my flock,” Judah promised. “But what will you give me to guarantee that you will send the goat?” she asked. 18 “What kind of guarantee do you want?” he replied. She answered, “Leave me your identification seal and its cord and the walking stick you are carrying.” So Judah gave them to her. Then he had intercourse with her, and she became pregnant. 19 Afterward she went back home, took off her veil, and put on her widow’s clothing as usual.

Yes, this was where the scandal get’s really bad. How could Tamar do such a thing, to have sex with her father-in-law? She definitely took advantage of Judah at a vulnerable time… his wife recently passed away.

Through this weird and twisted stunt that Tamar pulled off but through this Judah was exposed.

Judah was all about himself, he didn’t care what happened to anyone else. Everything Judah did was all about Judah.

Judah sent his friend to look for the prostitute to pay for her services but she wasn’t there. She was nowhere to be found, in fact the locals have never seen any shrine prostitute in that area. To risk any further embarrassment he never pursued it any further but Judah kept the goat for himself.

Judah thought that his impulsive one night stand was behind him, but… vs. 24

Genesis 38:24–26 NLT

24 About three months later, Judah was told, “Tamar, your daughter-in-law, has acted like a prostitute. And now, because of this, she’s pregnant.” “Bring her out, and let her be burned!” Judah demanded. 25 But as they were taking her out to kill her, she sent this message to her father-in-law: “The man who owns these things made me pregnant. Look closely. Whose seal and cord and walking stick are these?” 26 Judah recognized them immediately and said, “She is more righteous than I am, because I didn’t arrange for her to marry my son Shelah.” And Judah never slept with Tamar again.

God never justifies this. Even though this was so wrong on so many levels, God still uses this to get Judah’s attention.

God uses this to work out a brand new branch for the Messiah Jesus to come through.

God uses Tamar’s desperate move to bypass Judah’s bad decision in marrying a Canaanite woman, loosing 2 out of 3 of his sons because of sin, and loosing his wife as well.

God redeemed Judah’s bad choices to show us that God is bigger then our bad decisions. Our bad decisions in the past don’t have to define our present and future.

This was where Judah finally acknowledged his sin and where repentance began to take place in Judah’s life.

Genesis 38:27–30 NLT

27 When the time came for Tamar to give birth, it was discovered that she was carrying twins. 28 While she was in labor, one of the babies reached out his hand. The midwife grabbed it and tied a scarlet string around the child’s wrist, announcing, “This one came out first.” 29 But then he pulled back his hand, and out came his brother! “What!” the midwife exclaimed. “How did you break out first?” So he was named Perez. 30 Then the baby with the scarlet string on his wrist was born, and he was named Zerah.

God blessed Tamar with not just a son but twins and one of them became a part of God’s Big messy family.

God took away Tamar’s shame by blessing her. Even though she was a widow God used her surprising initiative and Judah's eventual acknowledgment of his wrongs to serve as a pivot for divine intervention.

We see here that God uses even the broken paths and flawed decisions to prepare the way for His promises.

God's grace extends to the least likely individuals, regardless of our past.

If God has a place for Tamar and Judah in His redemptive family, who are we to write off God’s story for us?

Think about your own imperfections in light of God's inclusive grace. It’s God’s grace that gives us the power to redeem and to rewrite our messy stories. God gives us the power to repent and live in victory.

3. Salvation’s Unlikely Lineage

God’s plan of salvation consists of the most unlikely candidates. Who would have thought that Tamar, a widow who dressed the part of a prostitute in order to get pregnant, would be one of those listed in such a distinguished list.

Matthew 1:1–3 NLT

1 This is a record of the ancestors of Jesus the Messiah, a descendant of David and of Abraham: 2 Abraham was the father of Isaac. Isaac was the father of Jacob. Jacob was the father of Judah and his brothers. 3 Judah was the father of Perez and Zerah (whose mother was Tamar). Perez was the father of Hezron. Hezron was the father of Ram.

God’s redemption plan consists of a lot of questionable and marginalized individuals within God's promise of salvation.

We cannot overlook the grace-filled lineage that led to Christ. God calls all into His family no matter what our background.

You may think that you are too far gone, that your past will always define you, that your shame is too paralyzing… look at the list!

Jesus came into our broken world through broken people like Judah and Tamar. It wasn’t because they were good enough but it was because of God’s grace.

God’s grace and redemptive plan gives us the power to turn our shame into joy, our barrenness into fruitfulness, and our past into a glorious legacy of faith.

It’s through Christ that our identity is now secure. God has a way of transcending our past mistakes and societal injustices into HIS beautiful redemptive story.

TAKE AWAY

Is there anything that you are ashamed of that you think God will never forgive?

Do you believe that God wants to use your broken and ugly past and present as a part of God’s extended story of redemption?

Are you willing to admit that you have failed in certain areas of your life, turn to God for grace and forgiveness, and repent of your sin?