Cultivating Thanksgiving Through Lament.
Notes
Transcript
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Every year we have Thanksgiving, and each year there is an expectation to show gratitude.
Now, having an attitude of gratitude is not a bad discipline to have.
In fact, we need to practice gratitude regularly.
But if we try to use the discipline of gratitude to dismiss or cover up painful circumstances, or to cure depression, it becomes destructive, because we are not being honest.
The key to not having the discipline of gratitude dismiss or cover up painful circumstances is the discipline of lament.
Lament is God’s answer for the broken world we live in. It is God’s answer to the depression that this broken world creates.
Lament done well cultivates true gratitude, not a gratitude that covers or dismisses painful circumstances.
Mark Vroegop wrote, “In lament, we are honest with the struggles of life while also reminding ourselves that God never stops being God. His steadfast love never ends. He is sufficient. Therefore, our hope (gratitude) is not in a change of circumstances but in the promise of a God who never stops being merciful— even when dark clouds loom. His mercy never ceases. (Vroegop, Mark. Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy (p. 111). Crossway. Kindle Edition.)
It is from this space that authentic gratitude is born.
Therefore, we need to remind ourselves this Thanksgiving season how to lament well so we can give thanks well.
Lamentations 3 will be our reminder of God’s gift of lament to us.
As I read Lamentations 3:1-20, hear the heart of Jeremiah in his depression; see his honesty before God.
I am the man who has seen affliction
under the rod of his wrath;
he has driven and brought me
into darkness without any light;
surely against me he turns his hand
again and again the whole day long.
He has made my flesh and my skin waste away;
he has broken my bones;
he has besieged and enveloped me
with bitterness and tribulation;
he has made me dwell in darkness
like the dead of long ago.
He has walled me about so that I cannot escape;
he has made my chains heavy;
though I call and cry for help,
he shuts out my prayer;
he has blocked my ways with blocks of stones;
he has made my paths crooked.
He is a bear lying in wait for me,
a lion in hiding;
he turned aside my steps and tore me to pieces;
he has made me desolate;
he bent his bow and set me
as a target for his arrow.
He drove into my kidneys
the arrows of his quiver;
I have become the laughingstock of all peoples,
the object of their taunts all day long.
He has filled me with bitterness;
he has sated me with wormwood.
He has made my teeth grind on gravel,
and made me cower in ashes;
my soul is bereft of peace;
I have forgotten what happiness is;
so I say, “My endurance has perished;
so has my hope from the Lord.”
Remember my affliction and my wanderings,
the wormwood and the gall!
My soul continually remembers it
and is bowed down within me.
Jeremiah lays his heart bare before God.
He has taken the first and second steps of lament.
First, he turns to God.
Second, he is honest about how he is feeling.
In his honesty:
He attributes his suffering to God.
He pulls no punches as to how he feels.
He feels attacked.
He feels crippled.
He feels besieged with bitterness and tribulation.
He feels trapped.
He feels mocked.
He feels ignored and unheard.
He feels bereft of peace.
He feels like happiness does not exist.
He feels hopeless.
He feels bowed down because he always remembers his affliction.
How many of you can relate?
If we are honest, all of us can. We have all been where Jeremiah is emotionally.
When we are there, we need to turn to God rather than away from him. I know when we feel like this, the last thing we want to do is talk to God, especially when we feel like he is responsible for our misery.
But it is in turning to God and being honest about what we are feeling that we are coming before his throne of grace to receive mercy and grace to help in our time of need.
If we do not turn to God in honesty about how we feel, then we will stay stuck in remembering our afflictions. Depression consumes us.
If we do not turn to God in honesty about how we feel, but try to cover it or dismiss it with an attitude of gratitude, then we will be more bereft than before because gratitude without honesty only cleans up the outside.
We now come to the third and fourth steps of lament, which are:
Remembering the truth.
Trusting God’s character.
No one likes to feel miserable. So we want to skip the first two steps and go directly to remembering the truth and trusting God. The attitude of gratitude is a discipline for remembering truth and expressing trust, but when done too soon, it covers or dismisses how we feel.
We can often have a very condemning conversation in our head for how we feel when we bring truth and trust into the lament process too soon.
Jeremiah does not condemn how he feels when he recalls the truth and chooses to trust.
Let's look at Lamentations 3:21-26 and hear the truth and trust that Jeremiah turns to after he has been honest about how he feels.
But this I call to mind,
and therefore I have hope:
The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
“The Lord is my portion,” says my soul,
“therefore I will hope in him.”
The Lord is good to those who wait for him,
to the soul who seeks him.
It is good that one should wait quietly
for the salvation of the Lord.
After he has turned to God with how he feels, then he rehearses the truth and chooses to trust, which brings him hope.
Oh, and what beautiful truths they are:
The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases.
His mercy never comes to an end.
His mercies are new every morning.
God is our portion; he has chosen to save us.
The most fundamental expression of trust is two things.
First, to seek God in the midst of adversity or depression.
Second, to wait on God’s salvation, whether it be in this life or the next.
Authentic gratitude is cultivated through:
First, turning to God.
Second, being honest with God about how you feel and receiving his empathy.
Third, rehearsing the truth of God's character.
Fourth, choosing to trust God by seeking him and waiting on him.
Church, go this Thanksgiving season, cultivating authentic gratitude through the four steps of lament.
