What Is a Man

A real man is a man whose life goal is to be like Jesus

Who is your greatest James Bond?

I’ve got to admit I’m one of about 12 people that liked Roger Moore.

But my best Bond is Daniel Craig because Daniel Craig is a man’s man.

Hard, strong, determined

But also intuitive, smart and in the right places, emotional.

And not girlie emotional - guy emotional.

There was a 007 movie made with a female lead.

I didn’t watch that one - don’t plan on it either.

007 is James Bond, not Jasmine Bond or Jamie Bond, but James.

007 has to be a man.

But why?

Why does it have to be a man?

Well, that begs us to answer the question

What is a man?

What makes a man special?

Sounds like a ridiculous question to some of us.

Within seconds of being born, the doctor will exclaim, “It’s a boy.”

And nowadays with sonograms, the technician can say, “It’s a boy” a long time before mom and dad get to meet the little booger.

And yet, just a few years ago, Matt Walsh wrote a book and made a documentary titled, “What is a woman?”

And the answers some very educated, very high positioned experts gave left me incredulous.

They honestly could not answer the question with clarity.

They said all kinds of words, but gave no answers.

How did this happen?

The 1960’s were an era of protests and one of the protest movements was the Women’s Liberation Movement.

One of their most famous proponents was Gloria Steinem and one of her most famous sayings was

“A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.”

This philosophy is called egalitarianism.

When applied to men and women, essentially it means that men and women are interchangeable.

If a man can do something, so can a woman.

And conversely, if a woman can do something, so can a man.

In the musical “Annie Get Your Gun,” there is a song that the male and female leads sing that says

“Anything you can do, I can do better.”

So the battle of the sexes began and for the last 65 years at least, men have been subjected to a massive beat down.

You name it, we were either too much or not enough.

The war cry was that men had to change.

Well, men did - to the point that some men decided they needed to change into women.

That wasn’t a win.

I’m sure if I opened the floor you could give me dozens of things this idea has harmed in our society

But let me give you one of the most disturbing right here in our own county.

In the 23-24 school year, we had 4,994 students enrolled in the Jones County School system.

Of those, 31.4% are in single parent or other parent - that’s like grandma and grandpa raising the kids homes.

That’s 1,568 students who mostly don’t have a dad in the house.

I know there are situations and I’m not beating up on you if that’s you.

But I am offering up some reasons we are there - and a solution.

One of the reasons is we have told women that “A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.”

Women can do it all by themselves just as well as they could with any man around

And that is simply not true.

Another reason is society has clouded the idea of manhood until men no longer know what it means to be a man.

Our society made one giant mistake - we quit taking our definition of manhood from the scripture.

We asked the “experts” to tell us what a man is when really

The expert is the man who created us.

So, let’s ask Him.

What does the Lord say a man is?

Turn in your Bibles with me to Proverbs chapter 13, verse 22.

We’ll start there and then we’ll move around a bit.

While you find Proverbs,

Kids, I have a real simple assignment for you this morning.

I’m preaching about what a man is supposed to be, what his goals should be and how he should act.

Listen for something that your daddy does really well, and when you get home

Tell him you heard and thank him for doing it.

And if your dad is not around, listen for something that a man in your life does really good

It could be a grand dad, an uncle, a teacher, or some man in this church that you really admire

And after the message today, go to them and tell they how much you appreciate them.

You’ll do more good by doing that than you can ever imagine.

Listen for me to say the name of Jesus, because really, Jesus was the only perfect man that ever lived.

We all want to be like Jesus.

Hear now the Word of the Lord from Proverbs 13:22

Proverbs 13:22 ESV

A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children, but the sinner’s wealth is laid up for the righteous.

This is the word of the Lord, thanks be to God.

Let us pray:

Lord, keep us from missing the point this morning.

Cause the Holy Spirit to remind us constantly of Jesus and teach us how to follow Him well.

Lord, heal the hurt in many men’s hearts and confirm in them your desire to lead them to glory.

In Jesus’ name, Amen

A real man loves Jesus

And right off the bat we have a problem

It’s the word love.

Along with society messing with the definition of a man and a woman

Society has trashed the meaning of love.

In modern parlance, love is an emotion that is touchy-feely, full of gushy words and love songs.

In some contemporary Christian music, you could easily switch the name of Jesus with your boyfriend or girlfriends name and it would fit just fine.

A man can’t sing a love song to a man - that’s just weird.

Society says love is romantic - candlelight and flowers

Holding hands and whispers in the night.

And yeah, for a guy loving a guy - that’s just no.

So let’s reframe the conversation.

Suppose we are living a James Bond movie - just roll with me here.

Things are blowing up all over the place - death and mayhem are everywhere

And everywhere you turn there is something there that will destroy you.

You have your family with you and you are fighting to save them but the battle is crazy

And no matter what you do, it seems like there is no escape.

Then you bump into the Daniel Craig James Bond.

He’s bloody and beat up, but he’s still going.

He sees your situation and he says, “Follow me.”

What are you going to do?

I’m following the tough guy.

He knows what he’s doing.

He’s bloody but he’s still going.

I’m following him.

So, what we are saying here is this, if we love a man, then we follow the man.

The emotions men feel are respect and admiration and loyalty.

Somebody talks bad about him and we are ready to fight.

Guys, have you had someone in your life you felt that way for?

That’s man love.

How do we have man love for Jesus?

Proverbs can help us here: Proverbs 28:13

Proverbs 28:13 ESV

Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.

Confess your sins - let’s talk about that.

Everyone everywhere telling you what a real man is but they have no clue.

Daniel Craig movie - they are as lost as you are in a dangerous world that wants to destroy you and your family.

And you meet Craig and you realize immediately that he knows the way, he goes the way and he will show you the way.

You have to make to make a choice.

Do I keep doing my thing and hope I get better at it?

Do I follow the man who already knows how to save my family and me?

Simple choice to me.

So you tell him, I want to follow you.

What have you done?

You’ve confessed that, try as hard as you can, you can’t do it.

You don’t know how to save yourself and your family and you need help.

That’s what we have to do with Jesus.

Listen, even if we could navigate our families successfully through the junk of this world

We still lose them to death.

We can’t win against that monster - it always wins.

Unless - we find the man who knows how to beat that monster too.

Listen to me men, not a single one of us can save our family’s lives - they will all die.

But Jesus can

A real man responds to Jesus by confessing how much we need him and we follow him.

To follow someone, we have to hear them speaking

Listen to this Proverb too: Proverbs 13:13

Proverbs 13:13 ESV

Whoever despises the word brings destruction on himself, but he who reveres the commandment will be rewarded.

Gentlemen, Jesus speaks to us through the Word of the Bible.

I know that sounds all churchy and junk, but listen.

I don’t know how many of you work corporate jobs, but if you have, how many of you have read

“The One-Minute Manager,” “The One-Minute Manager Meets the Monkey,” “Who Moved My Cheese”

“The Seven Habits of Highly Successful People,” “Whale Done,” “The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership.”

I’ve read them all.

If you went to college or trade school

If you’ve taken any licensure exam, you read everything you needed to know written by the experts to pass that exam.

If you are a plumber, electrician, HVAC contractor, barber, you have a license where you had to study and take a test.

Dudes, really - ditch the resistance to church stuff, pick up your Bible and start reading.

Start with the book of John.

One chapter a day.

Ask the Lord before you start, “I know this story isn’t going to seem like it applies to my life. Show me how it does.”

Then read.

And read the next day.

And read the next day, and keep on reading.

It might take a second, but one day you’ll start realizing

“Jesus is teaching me how to save my life and save my family.”

You know what - I had to go back and dig out the titles of every one of those books I read.

Not a one of them said anything that saved my life.

This one (HOLD UP THE BIBLE) - this one did.

It is still teaching me how to lead my family to safety in a world that wants to destroy them

So what I’ve got to do, as a man, is

Endure to the end

Gentlemen, it all boils down to this in Proverbs 3:5-6

Proverbs 3:5–6 ESV

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

Here’s the big question gentlemen.

You are in the 007 Daniel Craig movie.

The world is going crazy around you and if you don’t do something fast, you and your family will die.

You meet Daniel Craig.

You are immediately convinced he knows the way out of this.

So you follow him.

But the big question is, do you keep following him?

Simply, do you trust him only to get you out of danger

Or do you trust him to lead you to the promised land?

Lots of men use Jesus for their get out of jail free card.

Fewer men will be found marching behind King Jesus at the end.

Gentlemen, if you are going to lead your family to safety, you’ve got to commit yourself to following King Jesus to the end.

There is no other solution.

Now, let’s talk about

The Givens

We’re discussing what is a man and we could go on and on, really.

Truth be told, I started out with four major points with multiple sub points under each point.

But as I wrote I started to realize, there are some givens here that real men accept.

Given number one - God’s Word tells us to grow up, get married, have babies and work hard to support them.

Again our government has played a dirty trick on us men.

With Obamacare, the age for a person to be considered a child was raised to 26.

You can stay on mommy and daddies insurance until you are 26 years old

That means you can be considered a child until you are 26 years old.

That gives you time to go to college and get stupid in debt with student loans.

Have next to no responsibility for your life other than study and play.

And then graduate - and then - and then - listen - and then society tells men and women to get established in a career

And then maybe meet someone and settle down - in your thirties.

That’s not God’s design.

Do you remember hearing this? Genesis 2:18

Genesis 2:18 ESV

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”

Let me ask you a question, when God said this, had Adam been to college?

Nah.

Had he worked.

Yep - 3 - THREE sentences earlier God’s word says, “Genesis 2:15 “The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it.”

So Adam had already developed a work ethic when God gave him Eve.

A work ethic isn’t something you learn at college.

You learn that at home.

By watching a Godly dad building a career to support his family and a Godly mom building a home for them.

And by dad and mom requiring little Buffy and Jody to do chores and work around the house

And keep up with their school work and work to meet their obligations.

You may need education to do certain careers - but God did not create college to be a prereq for a successful life.

A career might define what you do with your life

But your family should define your career.

Given number two - A real man keeps his promises.

Gentlemen, the vow says, “Until death do us part.”

That’s a vow to the Lord.

King Solomon wrote the Proverbs, he wrote Ecclesiastes too.

Listen to what he said Ecclesiastes 5:4

Ecclesiastes 5:4 ESV

When you vow a vow to God, do not delay paying it, for he has no pleasure in fools. Pay what you vow.

Gentlemen, you might have blown this already once.

As far as it is up to you, don’t blow it again.

I went to the restroom at a restaurant a few weeks ago.

On their wall in the bathroom was a plaque that read “I am the captain of my soul.”

Real men realize that’s a lie.

Oh yes, I can choose who I want to follow, but once I have a wife and children, I am no longer the center of my universe.

My universe becomes a very tight orbit.

God is at the center - He’s the gravitational force that holds everything in orbit.

Outside that is my wife - she is the one the Lord gave to be my helper.

She is the one that completes the 1 + 1 = 1 equation.

Next comes our children.

They are the fruit of our relationship with our wives, but remember

We are raising them to leave.

And then there we are gentlemen, herding the cats

Keeping them close to Jesus

Keeping them close to home

Training the kids to grow up to be Godly people like we are

So they can then do what we’ve done

Not because we said do it

But because the Lord said, “This is the way, walk in it.”

Men we have a very hard task facing us.

We have to undo what the world has done to our families.

We have to die to ourselves and take up our cross daily and follow Jesus.

If we do, we’ll have a great shot at saving our wives and our families.

If we do not, well, watch the news and see how that working out for us.

Let us pray:

Communion

I read something last week that shut me up if you can believe that.

There is a Hebrew word in the Old Testament that is pronounced “dig” - like you did a hole.

But it means fish.

So those of us who fish, in Hebrew we “dig.”

But that word has a nuance of violence to it that I had never thought of.

Gentlemen, when we dig, when we fish, what happens when we hook a fish.

He fights right.

And the more he fights, the more fun we have wrestling him to the boat.

We’ll brag about what a fighter he was.

But now think with me - why did that fish fight?

He was fighting for his life

And when you pulled him into the boat - listen, here’s the point - his life as he knew it is over.

Mark tells us this in Mark 1:17 “And Jesus said to them, “Follow me, and I will make you become fishers of men.””

Now, do you understand why some men fight so hard to not follow Jesus?

They are literally fighting to hang on to the life they know, because they understand down deep inside

Once I’m hooked by Jesus, my life as I know it is over.

That’s a big request to make of someone - give up your life.

And yet, that is what Jesus did.

1 Corinthians 11:23–26 ESV

… on the night when [Jesus] was betrayed took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it, and said, “This is my body, which is for you. Do this in remembrance of me.” In the same way also he took the cup, after supper, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood. Do this, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of me.” For as often as you eat this bread and drink the cup, you proclaim the Lord’s death until he comes.

You know Jesus even struggled for just a moment.

He never resisted the Father’s plan, but He sure was concerned about the physical and spiritual pain He was about to experience.

I’m not making this up, again Mark says, Mark 14:36

Mark 14:36 ESV

And Jesus said, “Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”

But Jesus was a real man.

He followed the Father.

He kept His promises.

He endured whatever the world threw at Him until He reached the promised land.

Brothers, as you take the Lord’s supper today, take it with the prayer on your lips that you can face this life with the resolve of Jesus.

That you can lead your family to salvation.

And sisters, as you take the Lord’s supper today, pray for your husbands.

God has placed a mighty burden on their shoulders.

Pray that the Lord would show you a way to encourage him so He could be like Jesus.

Let us pray:

We invite anyone who trusts Jesus as their Savior and has been baptized after their salvation to join us in the celebration of the Lord’s table.

When everyone stands, you’ll exit your pew to the left and come forward to the station nearest you.

You may eat the elements as soon as you receive them or if you wish, take them back to your seat to meditate for a moment.

If you have not trusted Jesus as your Savior, please look at this as a family celebration and maybe take some joy in that.

Please know that we pray for the day that you too will be able to join us as a member of the family of God.

The gluten free elements are at the ____________ table.

Please stand and come forward now.