Ephesians 4:25-32

Principles of New Life

Ephesians 4:25–32

1930

October 1, 1978 (John was 39 years old)

Ephesians 4:25–32 – New Life, New Lifestyle

Sermon Summary (John MacArthur)

1. Big Idea of the Sermon

When God makes a person new in Christ, He does not merely change their “status” in heaven; He changes their lifestyle on earth. Ephesians 1–3 describes who we are in Christ; Ephesians 4–6 describes how we live in Christ. In 4:25–32, Paul gets very concrete: the “old man” is put off, the “new man” is put on, and that shows up in five very practical exchanges:

Lying → Truth

Sinful anger → Righteous, controlled anger

Stealing → Working and sharing

Corrupt speech → Edifying, gracious speech

Natural vices → Supernatural graces

All of this is tied to Christ’s body (we are members of one another), to the devil (we must not give him a foothold), and to the Holy Spirit (we must not grieve the One who has sealed us for the day of redemption).

2. Context: From “You Are New” to “Now Live New”

We looked at Matthew 5 to 7, and we said that Jesus is saying there that people who are a part of His Kingdom will be different than the rest of the world.  They will think differently, they will talk differently, they will act differently.  They will have different motives, they will worship differently.  In other words, true children of the Kingdom are very easily distinguished from the world – at least in the pattern of distinction that is outlined in the Sermon on the Mount. 

There is to be a difference.  We’re not to be like the world.  When God recreates a person in Jesus Christ, there’s something new, there’s something different.  That new creation is, indeed, a new creation.  We saw that the Lord was talking, in Matthew 5 to 7, to a group of people who believed that they were the citizens of the kingdom.  They believed that.  They believed that they were the ones who were in on God’s economy.  That they were the recipients of God’s blessing.  They were professors, however, and not possessors.  They had covered up their sinful heart with a religious cloak.  They had masked with pseudo-spirituality the real carnality that was characteristic of their nature.  They were religious, they were not regenerated.

And we told you that if you are not living that way, if your life is not distinctly different from the world, there is a real possibility that you are not a Christian at all, no matter what you claim, no matter what you imagine, no matter how religious you are. 

Unless there is a distinction in your living, there is a good possibility that there is no distinction in your nature, either.  Now, Paul is reinforcing basically the same truth in Ephesians.

Peter says it in 2 Peter, chapter 1.  He says you have received the new nature.  You have received a nature that is beyond corruption.  You have received great and precious promises; you have been made a partaker of the divine nature.  Now, the only way that will ever be verified, the only way that calling and election can ever be made sure, is when you add to that, virtue.  And when you add virtue to that, you begin to see the reality of that.  He talks about virtue, and he talks about kindness, and he talks about love, and all of those characteristics of a new creature.  In other words, what Peter is saying is this: you will have the knowledge of your salvation, the assurance of your salvation, not by remembering a past event, but by seeing a present virtue. 

And even though the Lord is saying if you are a believer, this is how you will live, that doesn’t mean it’s against my will.  That’s the beauty of the paradox of the Christian life.  If somebody says to me, “Who lives the Christian life, you or the Lord?”  I have to say, “Well, it’s the Lord; ‘not I, but Christ liveth in me,’ and yet on the other hand, it’s me,” because unless I beat my body to bring it into subjection, unless I respond to the commands, unless I say ‘yes’ and yield to the Spirit of God moment by moment, it’s not going to happen.  So it’s God’s sovereignty 100 percent, and yet it’s my response to that in terms of my own will.  And there’s that same paradox.  And that’s exactly what Paul is saying here.  If you are a new creature, chapters 1 to 3, you will live like it, chapters 4 to 6. 

But you became a new creature on the sovereignty of God and your own will, chapters 1 to 3.  And you will live it out based on God’s sovereignty; you are a new creature, and on your will, you respond to that – so both are there.  Now, that’s very simple - we could go into deeper detail, but that’s sufficient for the moment.  And so you find in the Bible – now watch this – that frequently there will be statements, “This is how a Christian lives,” and then sometimes the same principle will be put in a command, “This is how you are to live.”  This is what God will do in your life if you’re a believer.  But this is what you must do.  You see, you are not a robot; you are involved, in a paradoxical way, in the explosion of divine energy in your life that makes you what you are to be. And so sometimes it’s a statement, and sometimes it’s a command.

MacArthur begins by connecting this passage to what he’s been teaching:

In Matthew 5–7, Jesus shows that true children of the kingdom are visibly different: they think, talk, worship, and act differently from the world. The religious in Jesus’ day were professors, not possessors; they had religious activity, but not new hearts.

Jesus says: “Except your righteousness shall exceed the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven.” In other words, outward religion is not enough: the life must match the claim.

In Ephesians, Paul does the same kind of thing:

Chapters 1–3: who you are (elect, redeemed, sealed, alive with Christ, seated with Him).

Chapters 4–6: how you live (walk worthy, walk in love, walk in light, walk in wisdom).

If there is no distinction in lifestyle, there is good reason to question whether there has been any true transformation at all. New creatures act like new creatures.

And yet, this is not mechanical or robotic. God’s sovereignty and the believer’s will meet in a paradox:

God makes you new in Christ.

You actively put off the old and put on the new.

So Paul now moves from general (“put off the old man, put on the new man,” 4:22–24) to specific—what that looks like in detail.

3. The First Exchange: Lying → Truth (v. 25)

And from now on the very end of the chapter, it’s a matter - the end of the book, rather – it’s a matter of very specific things.  This is where you need to activate your will.  This is where you need to say “yes.”  This is where you need to flip the switch that turns it on.  The general statement, verses 17 to 24, and now the specifics, right, beginning in verse 25.  And the first thing he does is this: he makes specific the general fact of changing from an old lifestyle to a new one.  And he gives you five categories in which the change takes place – five areas of illustration.  Number one: you exchange lying for speaking truth.  You exchange lying for speaking truth, verse 25. 

“Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour: for we are members one of another.” (Eph 4:25)

3.1. Lying: Mark of the Old Nature

And all of a sudden God comes into your life, and the Bible says God is true and every man a liar.  Christ comes into your life, and He says, “I am the way, the truth, and the life.”  The Holy Spirit takes up residence in your life, and He’s called the Spirit of truth, who will lead you into all truth.  And the Word of God is called the truth.  John 17: “Thy word is truth.” 

And all of a sudden, when you become a believer, you stepped out of a domain of lies into an element of truth.  You know the true God, redeemed by the true Messiah, indwelt by the true Spirit, possessing the true word, and living it out in a true kind of life.  And when a believer opens his mouth, according to Ephesians, chapter 4, verse 15, he should be speaking the truth

MacArthur reminds us:

Revelation 21:8 says that “all liars shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone.” Liars go to hell.

John 8:44 calls Satan “the father of lies.” A life characterized by lying shows a satanic source and a hellish destiny.

If habitual lying characterizes someone, there is no biblical basis for assurance that they are saved—no matter how religious or how active in church.

3.2. Truth: Mark of the New Nature

When God saves a person:

They come to know the true God, through the true Christ, indwelt by the Spirit of truth, with the Word of truth in their hands.

Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6).

The Spirit is called the Spirit of truth (John 16:13).

Scripture is “thy word is truth” (John 17:17).

So when the believer speaks, he ought to obey Ephesians 4:15: “speaking the truth in love.” Truth becomes his native language.

3.3. What Lying Looks Like

MacArthur lists many forms of lying:

Flat-out falsehood: saying what isn’t so.

Shading the truth.

Exaggeration.

Cheating in school or business.

Cheating on taxes.

Not paying debts.

Falsifying expense reports.

Breaking promises (even those made to God).

Betraying confidences.

Flattery (saying things you don’t mean to manipulate someone).

Excuses that cover sin rather than confess it.

Staying silent when the truth should be spoken.

All of this is forbidden. Instead, we are to “put away lying” (apotithēmi – throw it off like a filthy coat) and “speak every man truth with his neighbour.”

3.4. Why Truthfulness Is Essential: The Body

Paul gives a reason: “for we are members one of another.”

MacArthur’s illustration: your physical body depends on honest signals:

If your nerves lied about hot and cold, you’d be scalded or frozen.

If your eyes lied about curves in the road or oncoming trucks, you’d crash.

If your pain system lied, you’d never know you were sick.

The health of the body depends on truthful communication. So it is in the body of Christ: we cannot bear one another’s burdens, encourage, exhort, or help one another if we’re not honest. Truthfulness is essential to fellowship.

4. The Second Exchange: Sinful Anger → Righteous Anger (vv. 26–27)

Second, you exchange unrighteous anger for righteous anger.  “Be ye angry and sin not.”  There are three Greek words for anger: thumos, parorgismos, and org.  Thumos has to do with a boiling fury, you know, where you blow a gasket; it literally comes from “to go up in smoke.”  You just completely lose it.  Parorgismos is that inside, seething, fuming resentment, that comes out of jealousy, and anger, and envy, and it just sort of seethes, until you become an ugly, moody person with a root of bitterness. 

And org is a kind of anger, basically – and there is an overlap in these terms, but just giving you shades of meanings – org is a kind of word that has to do with a kind of a settled conviction kind of anger.  In other words, you have certain priorities in your life, you have certain things you’re committed to, and when something violates that, there’s a natural response.  For example, if you determine with all your heart to love a child that’s in your family, and you give yourself to that child, you’ll hate the one who would come along and hurt that child.  It’s that kind of settled commitment.  And these words can be good or bad.  You can be angry and sin, or be angry and sin not. 

But the whole crux of the matter is your motive, isn’t it?  By the way, thumos, it doesn’t seem to be a word that’s tolerated for a Christian.  The blowing up kind of a thing is not something that’s allowable for those of us who name the name of Christ.  Thumos is used to speak of unregenerate man; it’s used to speak of a man functioning in a sinful way.  It’s used to speak of Satan in Revelation 12:12, and it’s used to speak of God in Romans 2:8, and God literally blows His cork in final judgment.  That is used to speak of God’s ultimate wrath.  Now, only God can literally go to the ultimate end of anger – thumos would be the extreme anger – only God can go to the extreme end of anger and still be righteous, because everything in God’s mind is absolutely under control, even His ultimate anger, you see. 

“Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil.” (Eph 4:26–27)

4.1. Three Words for Anger

MacArthur notes three Greek words:

thumos – explosive rage, “boiling over,” going up in smoke.

parorgismos – inner resentment, simmering, seething anger.

orgē – settled, principled indignation.

Thumos is never commended for believers; it’s associated with sinful rage and with final judgment. Only God can express “ultimate” anger perfectly without sin.

4.2. When Anger Is Right

We must distinguish:

Sinful anger – selfish, uncontrolled, resentful, retaliatory. This is forbidden.

Righteous anger – anger for God’s honor, against sin, injustice, and evil.

Examples:

Jesus cleansing the temple in holy zeal.

Jesus “troubled in spirit” at Lazarus’ tomb, expressing indignation against sin and death.

Psalm 97:10: “Ye that love the LORD, hate evil.”

Psalm 69:9: “The reproaches of them that reproached thee are fallen upon me.”

Believers should be angry at sin and falsehood that dishonors God and destroys people. Many of us are not angry enough at what dishonors God, yet are very quick to get angry over personal offenses.

4.3. When Anger Is Sin

Sinful anger is:

Focused on self (“you hurt me,” “you stepped on my rights”).

Retaliatory and vindictive.

Allowed to simmer and stay (bitterness, resentment).

Expressed in ugly outbursts, pouting, moodiness, gossip, slander, revenge.

MacArthur points out the root issue: we get angry because we think we “deserve” better. But biblically we are spiritually bankrupt (Matt 5:3). We don’t have “rights” to defend in the way we often imagine. God has rights; His honor deserves our indignation when it is attacked. Our pride does not.

4.4. Deal With Anger Quickly

And I think that second part of the verse has reference to the wrong kind of anger.  The point being if you do have the wrong kind of anger, if you’ve got anger that is sin, then deal with it now, don’t sleep on it.  Don’t go to bed with it.  Face it and deal with it.  And you know, all through the New Testament, we’re told that when we face sin, we are to deal with it now, we are to repent, confess, and turn from it.  And by the way, that kind of stuff, that kind of unconfessed anger, anger that isn’t really dealt with, is really a bad thing.  When you have that angry, unforgiving spirit, 2 Corinthians 2:11 says, “Satan will get an advantage of you.”  You should never have any kind of anger in that manner.

Here’s the key to the whole thing – listen – you know why you get angry?  You get angry because people do things to you you don’t like.  The fact of the matter is you don’t deserve anything anyway, right?  That’s the whole point.  What do you deserve?  “You can’t do that to me?”  Why not?  Who are you?  “I have my rights.”  You do?  According to God’s standards, you’re never even going to enter His Kingdom, unless you’re broken in spirit; unless you’re bankrupt, and poverty stricken.  Listen, if you don’t have any rights, you can’t get too mad at somebody who steps on them, right?  Anger is a retaliating spirit.  Now, the only time it is ever right is when you defend God’s holiness, because God does have some rights, ’cause of who He is. 

And he says if you do this, if you let yourself get angry, verse 27, you will give place to the devil.  By the way, diabolos is the word here, it means slanderer – and watch this, it’s a little play on words.  If you are angry, inevitably what happens when you get angry is you slander.  You slander verbally, or you slander in your thoughts and your heart, and you have a place to the slanderer.  It’s just a repeat of John 8:44 – whenever you start lying, you’re of your father the devil.  Whenever you start getting mad, you give more evidence of being fathered by Satan.  So a person who never seems to have anything but an angry mood, and an angry spirit, and a bitter resentful heart, and an ugly kind of envious, jealous mood, gives evidence that perhaps he’s not a Christian at all, and is nothing more than one who has given the devil opportunity to display himself. 

“Let not the sun go down upon your wrath.”

If anger has slipped into sin, deal with it the same day.

Confess it. Repent. Seek reconciliation.

Do not let resentment harden into a settled disposition.

And if you don’t deal with it:

“Neither give place to the devil.”

Unresolved anger gives the slanderer (diabolos) a beachhead in your life. Just like lying shows you behaving like Satan, so harboring angry, unforgiving attitudes lets the devil exploit you and display his character through you.

5. The Third Exchange: Stealing → Working and Sharing (v. 28)

So first, exchange lying for speaking the truth, and second, unrighteous fury for holy wrath.  Third – here’s another practical one: when you become a Christian, he says, you are to exchange stealing for sharing.  Stealing is a problem for everybody, isn’t it?  Boy, I remember when I was a little kid I had a little phase in my life when I thought it was kind of neat to steal things.  I got out of that, fortunately, but I went through that little time.  I remember my sister used to do that too.  They were just as depraved as I was.  I mean that’s something in us.  That’s another part of the human system.  The old man steals.  But the new man doesn’t.  Look at verse 28; it’s a great verse.  “Let him that stole steal no more.” 

 whether you’re talking about stealing money off of your dad’s dresser, kids, I don’t know, it’s all stealing.  Stealing is taking anything that doesn’t belong to you.  Finding something before it’s lost.  Now, the Bible talks about a lot of different kinds of stealing.  Psalm 37:21 talks about the non-payment of debt.  If you don’t pay your debt, you’re stealing from your debtor, or your creditor, rather.  It talks about falsifying expense accounts.  That’s stealing. 

That’s the whole biblical ethic; that’s the whole base of our working.  Verse 13 of Luke 14 says, “When you give a feast, call the poor, the maimed, the lame, the blind, and thou shalt be blessed, for they can’t pay you.”  Isn’t that good?  They can’t pay you.  They can’t buy a ticket.  And God will bless you.

“Let him that stole steal no more: but rather let him labour, working with his hands the thing which is good, that he may have to give to him that needeth.” (Eph 4:28)

5.1. The Old Life: Stealing

Stealing is deeply ingrained in fallen human nature. It can take many forms:

Obvious theft: taking something from a store, a person, or an employer.

Non-payment of debts (Psalm 37:21).

Cheating on taxes.

Abusing expense accounts.

Underpaying employees (cf. James 5).

“Finding” what isn’t really lost (just taking what isn’t yours).

1 Corinthians 6:10 is clear: “thieves … shall not inherit the kingdom of God.” Persistent thievery is a mark of the unregenerate.

5.2. The New Life: Hard Work and Generous Sharing

The command is simple: “Let him that stole steal no more.” But Paul doesn’t stop with “don’t steal”; he replaces it with a positive pattern:

Work hard.

“Let him labour” – the word used points to manual, strenuous work.

Work is not a curse; it is a God-ordained calling.

Exodus 20:9: “Six days shalt thou labour…”

2 Thessalonians 3:10: “If any would not work, neither should he eat.”

Do what is good.

Work that is honest and beneficial, not sinful or exploitative.

Work in order to give.

Purpose: “that he may have to give to him that needeth.”

This is revolutionary: the Christian works not primarily to hoard, but to share.

Paul himself modeled this (Acts 20): he worked with his hands to support himself and those with him, so he would not be a financial burden to the churches.

The biblical ethic: get more so you can give more, not to pile up for self.

6. The Fourth Exchange: Corrupt Talk → Edifying, Gracious Speech (v. 29)

Fourth, another exchange; he says that the new man will exchange another category: corrupt communication will be exchanged for edifying words.  This is very practical.  Verse 29:  “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.”  Now, I’ll be very frank with you.  Nothing – nothing – is more distasteful to me than filthy communication.  I just really can’t tolerate that.  I don’t like that.  I don’t want to be a part of that.  I don’t like to be around that.  That’s not something that interests me. 

Let me give you a verse to remember.  Psalm 141:3, mark it down.  Psalm 141:3 says: “Set a watch, O Lord, before my mouth and keep the door of my lips.” Listen – if Jesus Christ is the doorkeeper of your lips, then He’ll be the one who determine what comes out.  There’s no place for corrupt communication. When anybody talks like, that it’s pretty obvious what’s going on, because Matthew, chapter 12, says, “Out of the abundance of the heart” - what – “the mouth speaks.” 

The mouth speaks, and you can tell a lot about somebody’s heart by what comes out of their mouth.  In chapter 5 of Ephesians – look over on the next page, verse 3.

“Fornication, uncleanness, covetousness, let it not be once named among you.”  I mean, once, it shouldn’t even be there.  “Neither should filthiness nor foolish talking.”  There’s no place for dirty talk, filthy or foolish, obscene talk.  And you know, in Romans chapter 3, when it discusses the depravity of man.  It shows how man’s depravity starts from inside, and comes up through his mouth, and his tongue, and his lips, and it comes out.  Get rid of all that.  And in its place here’s what you do – three features of the speech of the new man, verse 29. 

If we just said what was edifying and necessary, we would be - people would flock to be near us.  Third, gracious, the end of verse 29: “That it may serve grace to the hearers.”  It’s just like coming out like a waiter, and giving them a feast of grace.  Is there sweetness in what you say, that blesses, and ingratiates.  You know, every time you open your mouth, it should be building, it should be fitting, and it should be gracious.  That’s the way we ought to talk.  That’s what ought to come out of our mouths, not filthy communication.  We have a new heart, and out of the abundance of a new heart should come a new speech.  I love what it says in Luke 4:22: “And everybody bore Jesus witness, and wondered at the gracious words which proceeded out of His mouth.” 

“Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.” (Eph 4:29)

6.1. Corrupt Speech

“Corrupt” (sapros) means:

Rotten, decaying, foul.

Like rotting fruit or meat—useless, offensive, and harmful.

This includes:

Obscenities, crude jokes, filthy stories.

Innuendo, double meanings.

Coarse, suggestive remarks.

MacArthur emphasizes: filthy communication has no place in the Christian life. Colossians 3:8: “Put off … filthy communication out of your mouth.”

What comes out of the mouth reveals what is in the heart:

“Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.” (Matt 12:34)

6.2. Three Marks of Godly Speech

Paul gives three positive tests:

Edifying – “that which is good to the use of edifying”

Our words should build up, strengthen, encourage, and help people grow in Christ.

Around the house, in the car, at church—do our words leave people more grounded and encouraged spiritually?

Fitting / Necessary – “to the use” (literally: as it fits the need)

Ask: “Is what I’m about to say needed?”

Not every thought needs to be spoken.

We should speak what fits the situation in a helpful way.

Gracious – “that it may minister grace unto the hearers”

Our speech should be like serving a tray of grace to those listening.

It should bless, heal, and show kindness.

People marveled at Jesus:

“And all bare him witness, and wondered at the gracious words which proceeded out of his mouth.” (Luke 4:22)

When the Word of Christ dwells richly in us (Col 3:16), the same kind of gracious, edifying speech will increasingly characterize us.

7. Don’t Grieve the Holy Spirit (v. 30)

And the result of it all, verse 30: “Grieve not the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you are sealed to the day of redemption.”  The Spirit of God grieves, and what makes Him grieve?  What makes Him grieve is when you, as a believer, don’t exchange the old for the new.  The Holy Spirit is grieved when He sees lying instead of the truth, when He sees anger instead of forgiveness, when He sees stealing instead of sharing, and when He hears corruption instead of graciousness.  And the point that he is making in verse 30 is how could you possibly grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you are sealed till the day of redemption? 

“And grieve not the Holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption.” (Eph 4:30)

MacArthur ties this command to everything above:

When believers lie instead of telling the truth…

When they indulge sinful, selfish anger…

When they steal instead of work and share…

When they pour out corrupt talk instead of gracious words…

…the Holy Spirit is grieved.

7.1. The Spirit’s Gracious Work

The Spirit:

Has sealed us—marked us as God’s own, authentic and secure.

Holds us fast “unto the day of redemption”—our final glorification.

Has taken up residence in our bodies as His sanctuary.

In light of that mercy, how could we knowingly live in habits that pain Him? The argument is: the more you appreciate what the Spirit has done and is doing for you, the less you will want to grieve Him.

8. The Fifth Exchange: Natural Vices → Supernatural Graces (vv. 31–32)

Then a final contrast – we are to exchange natural vices for supernatural graces.  Verse 31 - and he just kind of sums it up:  “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all evil.” 

Now, listen to what he said.  He sums it up.  He says, “Look, bitterness” – that smoldering resentment, that brooding, grudging, unforgiving spirit – and then he says, “and all wrath” – and all of that wild reaction – “and all of that anger” – that inside illicit kind of resentment – “and all clamor” - do you know what the word clamor means?  It means a violent outburst, yelling in public.  You know, all you have to do is, you know, be around your neighborhood for a while, and you hear that, especially in the summer, when the windows are open.  Well, we’ve heard some interesting things in our neighborhood.  Yelling publicly, that’s clamor.  Or really screaming at the guy who cut you off on the road, “You stupid” – you know.

But the point here is this: you’ve got the wrong relationship to people, see.  It’s all relational here.  He’s not talking so much about your relation to God; in this whole passage, it’s how you relate to people, because the body is the concept here in this book.  And when you deal with people, you can’t be bitter, or wrathful, or angry, or clamorous, or slanderous - evil speaking, blabbering behind their back in secrecy.  Get rid of that - put it away. 

And that’s just why verse 32 ends the way it does: “Even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”  You want to hear something interesting?  God was kind to you.  And God was tenderhearted to you.  And God was forgiving to you.  And you want to know something?  You didn’t - what - deserve it.  If you’re going to base it on that premise, you’ve missed the point.  You don’t yell at somebody because they deserve it; you yell at somebody because you’re sinful.  You don’t evil speak about somebody because they deserve it; you evil speak because you’re sinful.  You don’t get angry at somebody because they deserve it; you get angry because you’re sinful.  You don’t get wrathful and clamorous because somebody deserves it; you do it because you’re sinful. 

Because the character of God says, “I don’t care what you’ve done to me, I’ll love you, and I’ll be kind to you, and I’ll be tender to you, and I’ll forgive you.”  And Paul says, “And that’s exactly what God expects to see out of you Christians.”  If you’re a new creature, it ought to be there.  If you’re new in Jesus Christ, it ought to be there. 

“Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” (Eph 4:31–32)

8.1. The Cluster of Vices (v. 31)

Bitterness – smoldering resentment; the brooding, simmering, unforgiving heart.

Wrath – explosive outbursts, surges of rage.

Anger – settled inner hostility and resentment.

Clamor – loud outcry, public yelling and screaming; noisy quarrels.

Evil speaking – slander, whether loud and public or whispered in secret.

Malice – general evil intention, the desire to hurt.

All of these are relational sins—how we treat others, especially in the body of Christ and in our homes.

Paul says: “Let all of that be put away from you.” Throw it off. It does not belong to the new man.

8.2. The Cluster of Graces (v. 32)

In place of vices, the new man puts on:

Kindness – active goodness, a disposition that seeks others’ welfare.

Tenderheartedness – compassion, empathy, a soft heart toward others’ weaknesses and sufferings.

Forgiveness – releasing the debt, not holding sins against people.

Most of us justify our bitterness: “You don’t know what they did. I have a right to feel this way.” Verse 32 removes that ground:

“…even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”

God was kind to us.

God was tenderhearted towards us.

God forgave us—not because we deserved it, but for Christ’s sake.

So when we refuse to forgive, or cling to bitterness, or rehearse grievances, we are acting unlike the God who saved us. The standard for our forgiveness of others is God’s forgiveness of us in Christ.

9. The Witness of a New Community

MacArthur closes with a strong pastoral appeal:

If we, as the church, actually lived this way:

No lying, but truth in love.

No sinful anger, but holy zeal and patient grace.

No stealing, but hard work and generous sharing.

No corrupt talk, but edifying, fitting, gracious speech.

No bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander, or malice—but constant kindness, tender hearts, and ready forgiveness…

Then the world would take notice. Our message would be backed up by a radically different community life.

This passage calls us both to self-examination and to hope: God has made us new; now we must, by His Spirit and Word, live like what we are.

10. Application Points

Examine your honesty.

Are there patterns of shading the truth, exaggerating, hiding, or flattering?

Ask God to show you any “respectable lies” you’ve grown comfortable with.

Deal with unresolved anger today.

Is there anyone you’re resentful toward?

Confess sinful anger to God; where needed, seek reconciliation before “the sun goes down.”

Review your financial and work habits.

Are you fully honest in business and taxes?

Is your goal at work mainly to accumulate, or to have more to give to those in need?

Audit your speech.

Listen to yourself for a day: does what you say build up, fit the need, and show grace?

Where you see sarcasm, filth, or tearing down, confess and ask God to “set a watch, O LORD, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips” (Psalm 141:3).

Pursue kindness and forgiveness in specific relationships.

Who are you bitter toward?

Consciously remember how God forgave you in Christ, and prayerfully choose to release the debt.

Seek not to grieve the Spirit.

Before speaking or acting, ask: “Will this grieve the One who sealed me for the day of redemption?”

11. Suggested Memory Verses

Ephesians 4:29

“Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.”

Ephesians 4:32

“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”

12. Key Cross-References

New life and new creation:

2 Corinthians 5:17 – “If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature…”

Colossians 3:9–10 – put off the old man, put on the new.

Truth and lying:

John 8:44 – the devil as father of lies.

John 14:6; 16:13; 17:17 – Christ, the Spirit, and the Word as truth.

Revelation 21:8 – the eternal destiny of liars.

Anger and forgiveness:

Matthew 5:21–26 – anger and murder.

Psalm 97:10; Psalm 69:9 – hatred of evil and zeal for God’s honor.

2 Corinthians 2:10–11 – unforgiveness giving Satan an advantage.

Work, generosity, and theft:

Exodus 20:15 – “Thou shalt not steal.”

2 Thessalonians 3:10 – “If any would not work, neither should he eat.”

1 Corinthians 6:9–11 – thieves will not inherit the kingdom.

Speech and the tongue:

Matthew 12:34–37 – out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.

Colossians 3:8; 4:6 – put off filthy talk; let your speech be gracious and seasoned with salt.

James 3 – the tongue as a small but powerful member.

The Holy Spirit’s sealing and grief:

Ephesians 1:13–14 – sealed by the Spirit as a pledge of our inheritance.

1 Corinthians 6:19–20 – your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit.

13. Teaching Outline (for preaching/teaching)

Title: New Life, New Lifestyle – Five Exchanges of the New Man (Eph 4:25–32)

Introduction: Position and Practice

Ephesians 1–3: who you are in Christ.

Ephesians 4–6: how you live in Christ.

New nature necessarily produces a new lifestyle, yet involves your will.

Exchange #1: Lying → Truth (v. 25)

The world of lies; Satan as father of lies.

The new realm of truth: God, Christ, Spirit, Word.

Practical forms of lying.

Reason: we are members of one another – the body needs honest communication.

Exchange #2: Sinful Anger → Righteous Anger (vv. 26–27)

Three types of anger.

When anger is sinful: self-centered, lingering, destructive.

When anger is righteous: for God’s honor, against sin.

“Don’t let the sun go down”: deal with anger quickly.

Unresolved anger gives place to the devil.

Exchange #3: Stealing → Working and Sharing (v. 28)

Stealing in its many forms.

Thieves will not inherit the kingdom.

God’s design for work: labor, good work, in order to give.

The Christian ethic: work to bless others.

Exchange #4: Corrupt Talk → Edifying, Gracious Speech (v. 29)

Corrupt speech defined.

Three tests: edifying, fitting/necessary, gracious.

Jesus as model of gracious words.

Our speech as evidence of the heart.

The Spirit’s Grief and the Seal of Redemption (v. 30)

The Spirit’s sealing and security.

How our sins grieve Him.

The motivation of gratitude: how can we grieve the One who keeps us forever?

Exchange #5: Natural Vices → Supernatural Graces (vv. 31–32)

The cluster of vices: bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander, malice.

The cluster of graces: kindness, tenderheartedness, forgiveness.

The pattern: God’s forgiveness of us in Christ.

The call: imitate God’s forgiving love.

Conclusion: A Distinct Community

Imagine a church that lives this out.

The world would see the reality of the gospel.

Call to self-examination and repentance.

Prayer for the Spirit’s help to live as the new man.

14. Discussion Guide (for small groups / personal reflection)

New Nature and New Lifestyle

How does this passage challenge the idea that being a Christian is only about a past decision?

Where do you see the link between “who I am in Christ” and “how I live” most clearly in Ephesians 4?

Truth vs. Lies

What forms of lying are easiest for you to justify (e.g., exaggeration, excuses, “protecting” someone’s feelings)?

In what ways does remembering that we are “members one of another” help us fight lying?

Anger

Can you think of a time you had what you believe was righteous anger? What made it righteous instead of sinful?

Is there unresolved anger in your heart right now? What would it look like to deal with it before the “sun goes down”?

Stealing, Work, and Generosity

In what ways can Christians steal without ever taking something off a shelf?

How might your attitude toward your job change if you saw your paycheck primarily as a resource to help those in need?

Speech

If someone recorded your words for a day, what would they conclude about your heart?

What practical steps could you take to make your words more consistently edifying, fitting, and gracious?

The Spirit and His Grief

How does it affect you to realize the Holy Spirit can be grieved by your choices?

Which of the categories in this passage (lying, anger, stealing, speech, bitterness) most often grieves Him in your life?

Kindness, Tenderheartedness, Forgiveness

Who do you struggle to be kind and tenderhearted toward? Why?

How does remembering God’s forgiveness of you “for Christ’s sake” reshape your view of forgiving others?

Prayer and Response

Take a moment to confess any specific sins this text has exposed.

Ask the Lord to make you more like Christ in one specific area this week (truth, anger, generosity, speech, or forgiveness).

Reference

John MacArthur. https://www.gty.org/sermons/1930/principles-of-new-life