Anger

Series: The Semester on the Mount 

Title: The Kingdom of Heaven is Available in Anger – High School

Author: Ty Clark 

Key: Video    Scripture    Slides     Personal Stories 

INTRO.

We’re back! Another WEDNESDAY with my favorite people! If we haven’t met before, my name is [Student Pastor Name Slate Slide] and I’m the Student Pastor around here.

TENSION.

I’ll go ahead and apologize for this ahead of time, because you got out of school 5 hours ago, but I want to kick things off with a history lesson…

Does anyone know who Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton are?

[Wait for students to respond]

Ok! If you know who Hamilton and Burr are, tell me what they’re famous for!

[Have students give answers]

For those of you who aren’t history buffs (emphasis on the BUFF), Alexander Hamilton was the first US Treasury Secretary and one of the most influential Founding Fathers in American history. Aaron Burr was also one of the Founding Fathers and served as the Vice President under Thomas Jefferson.

But, neither of them are MOST known for those things, they are MOSTLY known for their conflict that got out of hand…

Both of them didn’t like each other much. They opposed each other often in politics, but their conflict came to a head at a dinner party where Hamilton made some harsh comments about Burr behind his back and they ended up being published in the local newspaper. Who knew history could be so spicy?! When Burr read what Hamilton said, he got angry and he demanded that Hamilton take back what he said, but Hamilton wouldn’t do it.

And so, Burr challenged Hamilton to their famous duel where Hamilton was wounded and eventually died, and Burr was charged with murder.

Think about that: what started as a small conflict between two people turned into one of them being killed by the other.

Now, none of us can relate to a small conflict with another person turning into something much bigger, right?

It’s funny, because OF COURSE WE CAN! We’ve all had moments like that:

You fought with your sister about who was going to wear the sweater you both love, and it turns into you not talking to each other for a week.

Your friend hangs out with someone else, so out of jealousy you gossip about them to hurt them back.

Your mom asks you about a bad grade to see what happened, and it turns into you wanted to go live with your dad because he doesn’t “nag” you.

We all have moments where a conflict leads to anger and anger explodes into to something way bigger.

And so, the question is: what do we do when there’s a conflict?

The good news is that Jesus has an answer for us.

TRUTH.

This semester, we are studying Jesus’ most famous sermon, called the Sermon on the Mount. It’s important to remember that this is all one sermon, because it helps connect the different stories, teachings, and ideas that are part of the sermon. And like any great sermon, the Sermon on the Mount has 1 big idea that Jesus introduced in Matthew 4:17:

Repent, for the kingdom of heaven has come near.”

Now, that’s definitely not the ONLY thing that the sermon talks about, but everything in the sermon is designed to help us understand and apply that main idea.

We started the series by talking about the word “repent” and the phrase “the kingdom of heaven.” “Repent” means re-aim. Everybody’s aiming their life at something—their version of the “good life.” Jesus is saying “aim at My version of the good life instead.” Something that He calls the Kingdom of Heaven.

The Kingdom of Heaven is a life where we are in a right relationship with God that leads to us being in a right relationship with everything and everyone else.

Having introduced all of that, Jesus brings up a topic that’s… kind of surprising. He starts talking about murder.

21 “You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, e and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ 22 But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister, will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the court. And anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.

What does He mean that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister is subject to judgement and anyone who calls someone a name is going to hell? It feels like Jesus took the conversation in a weird direction and it feels like He’s saying things that don’t make a lot of sense.

This is a good reminder – don’t forget that as you’re reading the Sermon on the Mount, it’s one sermon. EVERYTHING in the sermon is designed to help us understand and apply Jesus’ main point: that we should repent, because the kingdom of heaven has come near.

So what murder, discouraging others, and anger have to do with that?

Well, murder is the most extreme example of something that keeps us from having a right relationship with others. Hopefully we all can agree that murder is bad and that it ruins our relationships with other people, right?

I think Jesus is starting us all with an easy example that we can all agree on so that He can show us some other, harder to see examples of other things we do that ruin our relationships with other people. Because, at the end of the day, although murder does happen, it’s extreme and most people don’t do it. But a lot more of us struggle with ruining our relationships with other people in other ways like name calling, gossiping, and discouraging others.

But even more of us ruin relationships with others, not by what we say with our mouth or do with our hands, but by what we feel toward them in our heart: anger.

Anger, discouraging others, and murder, have more in common than we think: they are all the results of being aimed at the wrong target. They are how we live and treat other people when we are aimed at the wrong vision of what the good life is. They ruin our relationships with others, and ultimately, they keep us from being able to experience the good life that Jesus says is available to us.

So, if anger, discouraging others, and murder are all the results of being aimed at the wrong target, what is that target?

That target is the target that most of us are aimed at when we get into a conflict: the target of being right. Our goal most of the time is to make sure the other person knows that we are right and they are wrong. Being aimed at that target starts with something small like being angry at them and holding onto that anger. On the outside, it doesn’t look like much, but on the inside is changes how we look at and think about the person we’re angry at. We start to tell ourselves a story about them and why they’re wrong for what they did.

If you are angry for long enough, that anger you feel on the inside begins to show itself on the outside. You start to talk badly about them, and if that wonderful moment presents itself where you get to face them, you can talk badly TO them.

And then, if you walk around angry on the inside for long enough and you’ve had a moment to express your anger on the outside, you grow to want to do more than talk bad ABOUT them, you grow to want to do bad TO them.

And it all begins with a moment of conflict in a relationship with someone else and a need to prove that you’re right. Jesus is showing us that being right is the wrong target.

So, what is the right target, then?

He gives us a clue to the answer in v. 23:

23 “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, 24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift. 25 “Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still together on the way, or your adversary may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. 26 Truly I tell you, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny.

Jesus’ two examples of apologizing to a friend during church and settling with an enemy before you go to court are really interesting case studies on what the right target is.

In the first example, a person is at church and they are having a moment with God. During that moment, a conflict between them and a friend comes to mind and so they do what all of us would do: stop, pray, and ask God to give us strength, to take away the anxiety that we feel because of the conflict, and to convict the other person to come apologize to us because we’re right and they were wrong…

No, He says that during the moment with God when the conflict comes to mind, go find them and take the first step to make things right, and then come back and continue your moment with God. Why leave your moment with God to go to a person you’re angry with and don’t want to see?

The example of a settlement before going to court is another picture. In the example we have done something wrong and have refused to settle – which would most likely be done by admitting that we were wrong – so that it now has to go to court to be settled. Why settle out of court instead of waiting for the judge and jury to decide?

These examples feel odd and don’t make a ton of sense because they are examples of what the kingdom of heaven looks like. As we spend time with God, we realize what God does when He is in conflict with us. Romans 5:8 tells us,

8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

What’s Jesus’ point?

The good life isn’t about proving we’re right it’s about making things right.

We would leave our moment with God to go make things right with our friend because that’s what Jesus did for us when He left heaven to come to Earth and die on the cross. That is a right relationship with God leading to a right relationship with everything and everyone else. We can admit our own guilt without a judge needing to do it for us because we have already had to admit our guilt before God. That is a right relationship with God leading to a right relationship with everything and everyone else.

The good life isn’t about proving we’re right – it’s about making things right.

As long as we are aimed at proving we’re right, we will not be able to participate in the kingdom of heaven. We will continue to ruin our relationships with others. That is why Jesus’ invitation to us is to repent, re-aim at a better target that actually leads to the good life.

APPLICATION.

So, how can we re-aim our heart in the middle of conflict?

Choose to go first.

Because a lot of us want to prove we’re right, we wait on the other person to text first, to apologize first, or to make the first move. But Jesus pretty clearly says leave your gift at the altar and go reconcile to them…

Remember, a right relationship with God is what leads to a right relationship with everything and everyone else. God went first in coming to earth for us, choose to go first for them.

So here’s a question: Who is one person that you need to take the go first with this week?

Choose to listen.

When we are trying to prove that we’re right, we enter every conversation requiring the other person to understand us and our side of the story without first trying to understand them and their side of the story. Listening flips that disposition and helps us live out what James 1:19 says,

19 My dear brothers and sisters, understand this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger, 20 for human anger does not accomplish God’s righteousness.

Listening slows us down and helps us aim toward understanding their heart rather than proving our point.

So here’s a question: Who is someone you’ve been trying to prove a point to that you need to make a point to listen to?

Choose reconciliation over reputation.

Fighting to protect their reputation FIRST cost Hamilton and Burr everything. It’s not that our reputation doesn’t matter, reconciliation just matters more.

So here’s a question: Where do you need to let go of proving you’re right and start fighting to make things right?

Thank God that He didn’t prove He was right in our fight against sin. He made a way for things to be made right between us in spite of our sin.

We get the privilege to be like Him to the people we’re in conflict with this week and fight to make things right.

Let’s pray for the power of the Holy Spirit and the courage of the Holy Spirit to be those kinds of people this week.

[Prayer]