Judging

Series: Sermon on the Mount

Title: Family Dinner: What Do Kingdom People Do

Author: Will Bandy

Key: Video Scripture Slides Personal Stories

INTRO

Wednesday! It’s finally that time, Welcome to Family Dinner! Maybe you’re here because you were invited or simply because you found out through the great vine, we were serving Free food. And If I know anything about students. There’s nothing better than food that is $Free.99. However you found out, all that matters is you made it. So welcome!

Tonight is going to feel more like a conversation than a sermon. We’re going to bounce back and forth between some teaching and some discussion at our tables. And, like a healthy family dinner, everyone is invited to share. Even if you feel like you’re the crazy one at your table, I just want to tell you, your voice matters.

(Sp note: the focus here is to be light-hearted and funny. Share your experience watching a show or tv show or even reality show (titia lol) that incorporates the courtroom and a Judge. Do you think you’d be a morally correct Judge. Or do you feel ill-equipped to carry out the correct justice?)

Speaking of family; I don’t know about you, but I grew up watching all those courtroom TV shows with my grandma. You know the ones Judge Judy, Judge Mathis, all that drama where someone sues their neighbor over a broken lawnmower or $200 rent. And every time a show like that came on, I suddenly turned into the most moral, wise, put-together person in the room. I’m sitting there like, ‘How could they live life that way? If that was me, I’d never do that!’ All of sudden I’m Judge Will, handing out sentences from the couch.

If you didn’t grow up the same, then let’s have fun, here’s a quick video of a guy that was on probation for driving violations. And I’d love for you to think about how you would judge this situation lol Check it out: https://12stone-my.sharepoint.com/:f:/p/wbandy/EocmbT2xXxRBgtPjW5XkyLYBq5sbvuDlo6J5EgA4wwKBrQ?e=lX5eEY

(0:30-1:19).

Like, you can’t make this stuff up. Haha the man should have at least tried to not be that obvious lol. But you see, we all in some way can be low-key judgmental haha. Whether you judge a person for what they said, what they wear, or how they treat people. We all fall into the temptation of taking the role of a judge.

So just for fun I have to know

DISCUSSION BREAK #1:

What kind of Judge would you be? Cruel and Serious or laid back and chill?

If you were a judge what funny rule would you make everyone have to follow?

(3-5 minutes, communicator “feels it out” and restarts when room is ready or needs a shift)

TENSION

(laugh, let them share, then bring it back)

Alright, it’s funny, but whether we are aware of it or not, we step into the judge’s seat all the time. And Jesus actually had something very direct to say about it.

The Trap of Judging

Matthew 7:1–2 says:

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged…”

That’s a tough one. Because it makes us ask: “Wait are we never supposed to judge? What about when someone’s obviously wrong? Or living hypocritically?”

Here’s the trap:

We judge others by their actions, but we judge ourselves by our intentions.

If someone else messes up? “They’re careless.”

If I mess up? “Well, I meant well.”

We highlight their flaws and excuse our own. That’s the cycle Jesus is calling out.

Jesus’ Picture

Matthew 7:3-4 says:

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?”

Illustration: Get a plank of wood or stick from the woods for this and hve fun with the students showing how ridiculous we look holding up a plank of wood in our eyes having the audacity to call out the speck in another lol.

Jesus goes full comedy here. Like, imagine me walking up to one of you with a giant 2x4 sticking out of my eye. Like, “Hey, I noticed you’ve got a little eyelash stuck, let me help…” “Hold up let me get my magnifying glass… oops sorry I’ve got to use my good eye” 😂

It’s ridiculous. And that’s the point. Because that’s how ridiculous it seems in Heaven. Like why would I ever listen to someone about my eye problem who has a literal 2x4 sticking out of their right eye! You see we convince ourselves we’re “helping”…but really it’s a total lack of self-awareness.

Like in our heads, when we judge someone, we tell ourselves:

“I’m just trying to help them.”

But Jesus is saying no. That’s not help. That’s blindness. Until you deal with what’s blocking your own vision, you don’t have the ability to actually help anybody else.

The Flip

Verse 5 is the big flip:

“You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

Notice Jesus doesn’t say, “Don’t ever help someone else.” He says: “First deal with your own stuff, THEN you’ll be able to see clearly enough to help.”

Think: Self-awareness comes before helpfulness.

Accountability doesn’t mean judging who someone is, that’s God’s job. Accountability is simply holding people to the standard they already agreed to. But before you start pointing out everyone else’s actions, Jesus says you should be even more self-critical. If you solved what’s going on inside you first, your relationships would be way healthier.”

And that’s it—the plank is not just a funny picture. It’s a self-awareness problem. When I admit my own brokenness first, it actually gives me the compassion and clarity to approach someone else’s weakness in love instead of judgment.

DISCUSSION BREAK #2:

Why is it easier to point out others’ flaws than face our own?

What would shift if you stopped asking God to fix them, and started asking Him to fix you?

APPLICATION

So, what do we actually do with this? Here’s the starting line Jesus gives us:

Draw a Circle Around Yourself FirstThere’s an old saying

There’s an old saying from our marriage ministry here: it goes “Draw a circle around yourself, and then work on fixing everything inside that circle.”

That’s the plank picture. Before you ever point fingers, draw the circle. Start there.

I know this seems like a minor step, but it actually has a bigger impact. If you would to solve in yourself what you hate about the world it would not perpetuate the problem. Jesus is calling his followers higher showing us that to fix the macro it would take a bunch of micro fixes by everyone. Meaning the Internal broken pieces of us need to be addressed and not hidden while we point our finger at others. That’s hypocritical and wrong. And Jesus is helping us get to the root of it

Remember the Sermon on the Mount isn’t a bunch of random little teachings—it’s one big sermon. Jesus keeps coming back to the same heart issue from different angles. The Pharisees and scribes were SO judgmental over the external, but they were completely missing the intent of the law. They thought righteousness was checking boxes, keeping appearances, and measuring other people’s behavior.

But Jesus is showing everyone the original intent of the law. It’s not about externals. It’s about a transformed heart. The kingdom of God isn’t built on who looks the most put together. It’s built on people living in right relationship with God and right relationship with others.

We love to tell ourselves we “mean well.” But what if, instead of trusting our intentions, we slowed down and asked: “How are my actions affecting people?”

Because the truth is, people experience your actions, not your intentions.

Help With Compassion, Not with criticism Once you’ve done that self-work, THEN you can

Once you’ve done that self-work, THEN you can actually help. Not by humiliating, not by calling out to look spiritual, but by coming alongside someone with the clarity that only comes from humility.

CLOSE:

Self-awareness comes before helpfulness. You can’t see clearly to help someone else until you’ve let God deal with your what’s in your eye.

Said plainly: Focus more on compassion and love than on being critical of others.

So, this week, when you feel that urge to judge someone, imagine yourself holding this giant plank. (literally hold up the board again if you can)

Ask: What kind of Judge will I be?

And instead of being quick to judge, what if we were quick to extend grace? What if we let God be the Judge, and we just focused on getting our own hearts right first?

Because Jesus doesn’t need more judges in the world. He needs sons and daughters who love people enough to lead with grace.

Lets Pray