The First Father Christmas

The First Father Christmas

Text: Matthew 1:18–25 Big Idea: Joseph almost missed out on being part of God’s plan because of the pain he was in, but he overcame his fear and disappointment by placing his faith in God. Application: We can be reconciled to God, His family, and His plan for our lives by trusting Him this Christmas season.

Matthew 1:18–25 ESV

18 Now the birth of Jesus Christ took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. 19 And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly. 20 But as he considered these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 21 She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.” 22 All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet: 23 “Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall call his name Immanuel” (which means, God with us). 24 When Joseph woke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him: he took his wife, 25 but knew her not until she had given birth to a son. And he called his name Jesus.

THE PAIN

I. The Pain of Unexpected Circumstances (v.18–19)

Matthew 1:18–19 ESV

18 Now the birth of Jesus Christ took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. 19 And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly.

Explanation: Joseph believed he knew what his life would look like: a godly marriage, a stable home, a future he could count on. Then came the news—Mary is pregnant. Not by him. It shattered his expectations, wounded his heart, and left him unsure of what to do next.

Key Thought: Joseph was righteous yet confused and grieving over Mary’s unexpected pregnancy.

Point: Fear, hurt, and disappointment can make us question God’s purposes.

Pain is real! Disappointment is real!

God sees and hears, you can talk to him about your pain…

Psalm 6 — “I am worn out from my groaning… my bed is drenched with tears.”

Psalm 13 — “How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever?”

Psalm 31 — “My life is consumed by anguish… my strength fails.”

Psalm 38:6–10 “6 I am utterly bowed down and prostrate; all the day I go about mourning. 7 For my sides are filled with burning, and there is no soundness in my flesh. 8 I am feeble and crushed; I groan because of the tumult of my heart. 9 O Lord, all my longing is before you; my sighing is not hidden from you. 10 My heart throbs; my strength fails me, and the light of my eyes—it also has gone from me.”

Psalm 69 — “I am worn out calling for help; my throat is parched.”

Psalm 88 — The darkest psalm: ends without resolution; deep despair.

Psalm 22 — “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”

He has not forsaken you, He will never leave you!

Supporting Scriptures:

Psalm 34:18 “18 The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”  

1 Peter 4:12–13 “12 Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. 13 But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.”  

James 1:2–4 “2 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, 3 for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. 4 And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”  

Illustration: It’s like when bad news suddenly interrupts a season you thought was settled—when the job falls through, the diagnosis is unexpected, or the relationship breaks. Joseph faced the same crossroads we face: react in fear/despair or trust God.

ElizabethMarried Jim Elliot in 1953.

Together they served among the Quechua people in Ecuador.

Jim and four other missionaries attempted to reach the Huaorani (Auca) tribe—an unreached, often violent group.

January 1956: Jim and the team were speared to death by Huaorani warriors.

This event became one of the most well-known missionary stories of the 20th century.

In 1958, Elisabeth and her young daughter Valerie moved into the Huaorani village.

She lived among the very people who killed her husband, sharing the gospel and helping translate Scripture.

Many in the tribe eventually came to Christ.

This became a powerful global testimony of forgiveness, courage, and the call to missions.

Returned to the U.S. and became an influential author and speaker.

Application: Recognize that God’s plan may intersect with pain, but pain is not the end of the story.

Application: Acknowledge your pain but don’t let it prevent you from seeing God’s work.

THE PLAN

II. The Revelation of God’s Plan (v.20–21)

Matthew 1:20–21 ESV

20 But as he considered these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 21 She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.”

Explanation: As Joseph wrestled with confusion, God intervened. The angel revealed the truth: Mary’s child is the work of the Holy Spirit. Joseph wasn’t being betrayed—he was being invited into the center of God’s greatest redemptive act.

Key Thought: When our understanding fails, God reveals direction through His Word and His presence.

Point: God provides clarity and direction through His Word and His messengers.

Supporting Scriptures:

Jeremiah 29:11 “11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”  

Romans 8:28 “28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”

Isaiah 55:8 “8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.”

God does not owe you an explanation

We may not get an explanation this side of eternity

We may not get the explanation we like

Psalm 119:105 “105 Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.”  

Proverbs 3:5–6 “5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. 6 In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”

Proverbs 16:9 “9 The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.”  

Illustration: Like a GPS guiding a lost traveler, God provides direction when confusion threatens to derail us.

Matthew 28:20 “… And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.””

Application: Seek God’s guidance and trust His perspective over your own understanding of your circumstances.

Application: Let God’s Word guide your heart and mind this Christmas season.

THE PROMISE

III. The Fulfillment of God’s Promise (v.22-23)

Matthew 1:22–23 ESV

22 All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet: 23 “Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall call his name Immanuel” (which means, God with us).

Explanation: From Adam to Abraham, from the prophets to this very moment, humanity had been waiting for rescue. Israel had been longing for deliverance. Now—finally—God steps into the world as “Immanuel,” God with us.

Key Thought: God never forgets His promises; He fulfills them perfectly and personally in Jesus.

Point: God is always faithful and trustworthy, He fulfills His promises

Supporting Scriptures:

Isaiah 7:14 “14 Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign. Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel.”  

Galatians 4:4–5 “4 But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, 5 to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons.”  

2 Corinthians 1:20 “20 For all the promises of God find their Yes in him. That is why it is through him that we utter our Amen to God for his glory.”  

Therefore trust Him !!

Philippians 1:6 “6 And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.”

John 8:36 “36 So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.”

John 14:3 “3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also.”

bring you to himself

no more fear, death, sadness, sin… etc

Illustration: The dollar in your pocket only has value because of what it represents… its a promise.

Application: God may take longer than you expect, but He never breaks His word.

Application: Wait with hope—God’s timing is perfect and His promises are sure.

THE PRAISE

IV. The Response of Faith and Obedience (v.24–25)

Matthew 1:24–25 ESV

24 When Joseph woke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him: he took his wife, 25 but knew her not until she had given birth to a son. And he called his name Jesus.

Explanation: Joseph didn’t just hear God’s message—he obeyed it. He married Mary. He protected her. He named the child Jesus. His obedience brought him directly into God’s plan for saving the world.

Key Thought: Faith becomes transformational when it becomes obedience.

Point: Obedience allows us to participate in God’s redemptive story.

Supporting Scriptures:

James 1:22 “22 But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.”  

John 14:15 “15 “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.”  

Hebrews 11:6 “6 And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.”  

Do you view obedience and worship as separate acts?

Illustration: Like an actor stepping onto a stage with the script in hand, God directs us into the right role in His story.

Application: Respond in faith, allowing God to reconcile your life, relationships, and purpose this Christmas.

Conclusion: Joseph’s pain almost kept him from God’s plan, but faith and obedience brought reconciliation and blessing. When we trust God this Christmas, we too can step into His plan for our lives and be part of His redemptive story.

Small Group Questions

1. When you think about Joseph’s situation in Matthew 1:18–19, what emotions or questions do you imagine he wrestled with? How do you relate to those emotions in your own life?

2. Can you share a time when unexpected circumstances disrupted your plans? How did that experience affect your faith—positively or negatively?

3. Why do you think fear and disappointment so often cloud our ability to see God’s work in our situations?

4. The angel tells Joseph, “Do not fear.” What fears tend to keep you from fully trusting God, especially during seasons like Christmas?

5. Read Matthew 1:20–21 again. What does this passage show us about the way God guides His people? How have you personally experienced God providing clarity or direction?

6. Joseph received God’s plan through a dream and an angelic message. Today, God speaks through His Word and Spirit. What practices help you hear God clearly when you’re confused or discouraged?

7. The prophecy of Immanuel—“God with us”—was centuries in the making. How does knowing God fulfills His promises strengthen your trust in Him during seasons of waiting?

8. What promises of God do you struggle to believe right now? How does the birth of Jesus help anchor those promises in reality?

9. Joseph responded to God with immediate obedience (vv.24–25). What’s one area of your life where God is calling you to take a step of faith or obedience?

10. Christmas is often a season of busyness, emotion, and pressure. How can trusting God more deeply this Christmas lead to reconciliation—with God, with others, or with your own purpose?