Learning to trust

When my daughter was first learning to talk, one of the things she would always ask is, “What’s this? What’s that.” That’s always a cute question, right? It’s always cool to see a young child learning and discovering new things. But I remember thinking to myself, “I just know what the next question is going to be.” And I was dreading it. Parents, can you guess what that question is? Yep. “Why?”

And sure enough, that day came.

“Don’t touch that iron.” “Why?” “It’s hot.” “Why?” “Because we turned it on.” “Why?” “Because we have to iron the shirts.” “Why?” “It makes the shirts look nicer.” “Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?”

It was enough to drive us crazy.

Still, “Why” is a question we often ask as Christians, isn’t it? There’s so much we don’t understand in life. And because of that, we are so quick to ask “Why?” Especially when God doesn’t do things as we expect, or he asks us to do things we don’t understand.

Now the question is not bad in itself. But there are times when no matter what God says, we just don’t get it. And the question is, what do we do then?

We’re continuing our “Life Beyond” series. And if you want to boil our theme down to one phrase, it’s this: Learning to trust.

If you want to go into the beyond, to see all the good things God has in store for you, you need to learn to trust and obey him, even when you don’t understand all the whys. And that’s what we see in today’s passage. Take a look at John 11.

Just to give some background to today’s story, we’re near the end of Jesus’ life here on earth. And things were starting to get dangerous for him. In chapter 10, you see people literally picking up rocks to stone him to death and him having to get out of there.

Shortly after that, Jesus got some really bad news. A messenger came from two of his friends, Mary and Martha. Look at their message in verse 3.

“Lord, the one you love is sick.” (John 11:3)

I don’t know about you, but it seems like kind of a vague message. They didn’t say, “Lazarus is deathly ill. Please come quickly and heal him.” They simply said, “The one you love is sick.”

Why so vague? I suppose it’s possible they knew it was dangerous for Jesus. They were living close to the area where people had just recently threatened his life. Still, it’s pretty clear they wanted him to do something.

But as vague as their request was, Jesus’ response was even more vague. Look at verse 4.

When Jesus heard it, he said, “This sickness will not end in death but is for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it.” (John 11:4)

And then it seems he turned away. No “Tell them I’ll be there soon.” No “By the time you return, Lazarus will be healed.” No “I’m sorry, but it’s too dangerous for me to go.” Nothing.

I’m sure the messenger was stunned. “Wait, that’s all?” Maybe he turned to Jesus’ disciples and said, “Is he coming? Is he not coming? What do I tell Mary and Martha?” And all they could do was shrug.

What was going on with Jesus? Look at what John tells us in verse 5.

Now Jesus loved Martha, her sister, and Lazarus. So when he heard that he was sick, he stayed two more days in the place where he was. (John 11:5-6)

The older version of the Shinkaiyaku actually translates this better, and it’s reflected in the English. John doesn’t say, “Jesus loved them, but he stayed two more days.” He says, “Jesus loved them, so he stayed two more days.”

What a “great” way to show love, right? Stay and do nothing? For a lot of us, that’s hard to accept. In our way of thinking, if God really loves us, he’ll answer our prayer…NOW!” And if he doesn’t, we start questioning his love for us.

But John makes it clear: Jesus did love Lazarus, Mary, and Martha. He wasn’t indifferent. He wasn’t unconcerned about their pain. But sometimes, God’s love allows us to go through pain. He allows us to go through difficult times. I’ve seen my father go blind in an accident. I’ve seen my mother go through depression for years. I’ve seen friends die of cancer. I’ve had a cousin lose her son when he was in his twenties.

The question is, in the midst of our pain, can we still trust God. For some people I know, their answer was no. So they walked away from him. But for those who said yes, they found what Jesus said was true. They eventually saw God’s glory in it all. Mary and Martha would too.

That said, I’m sure the messenger went back to them shaking his head. Jesus’ disciples, however, seem to have been relieved. Sure, they cared about Lazarus and his sisters. But going back was dangerous. And so I’m sure it shocked them when two days later, Jesus said, “Let’s go back to Judea.” Look at their response.

“Rabbi,” the disciples told him, “just now the Jews tried to stone you, and you’re going there again?” (John 11:8)

But look at Jesus’ answer.

Aren’t there twelve hours in a day?” Jesus answered. “If anyone walks during the day, he doesn’t stumble, because he sees the light of this world. But if anyone walks during the night, he does stumble, because the light is not in him.” (John 11:9-10)

What was Jesus trying to tell them? “As long as I’m walking in the light of my Father’s will, I will be fine. It’s only if I don’t, that I’ll be in trouble.”

Now is Jesus promising that we’ll never have problems if we’re perfectly in God’s will? No. Throughout the Bible, you see people getting into trouble precisely because they were in God’s will. In Jesus’ case, being perfectly in God’s will meant the cross.

But even through our problems, even in death, we’ll ultimately find our good Shepherd there. And we’ll find his leading, his peace, and his joy in the midst of everything we go through. On the other hand, by walking away from him, all we’re left with is the darkness of bitterness and despair. I know people stumbling through that right now. Do you know people like that?

At any rate, Jesus then told his disciples the purpose for going to Judea. He said, “Our friend Lazarus has fallen asleep, and I’m going to wake him up.” (11)

At that, the disciples got more confused. They said, “Jesus, if he’s sleeping, that’s good. It means he’ll recover.” At which point, Jesus said simply, “He’s dead. And I’m glad for you that I wasn’t there so that you may believe.”

Jesus seems to be full of cryptic statements in this chapter, and we’ll see even more later. He was glad he wasn’t there? And what exactly were they supposed to learn to believe?”

None of this made any sense to them. After all, if Jesus was so set on going, why didn’t he go earlier? What was the use of going now when Lazarus was already dead? And yet, Jesus told them, “Let’s go.”

What would you have done? Would you have gone, knowing the danger Jesus was in? Would you have gone, even though nothing Jesus did seemed to make any sense? It’s just my imagination, but I can picture Jesus starting off and all the disciples just standing there dumbfounded. Finally Thomas speaks, and his words are not exactly brimming with faith.

“Let’s go too so that we may die with him.” (John 11:16)

That said, totally confused, understanding nothing, they followed. Why? That’s what disciples do. Let’s see what happened because they chose to do so.

Look at verse 17.

When Jesus arrived, he found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb four days. (John 11:17)

That number four is interesting for two reasons. First, it seems Lazarus died almost as soon as Mary and Martha sent the messenger. Think about it. There were no cars or trains back then. No texting to quickly find out where people are. It probably took at least a day for the messenger to find Jesus. Jesus then stayed two days where he was, and then it took another day to get back to Bethany. Four days. That’s how long Lazarus was in the tomb. In other words Lazarus would have already been dead two days even had Jesus left right away.

But second, according to Jewish tradition, many believed that after a person died, their spirit remained nearby for three days until the body started to decay. Only then would the spirit leave. So while Jesus’ delay made no difference in whether Lazarus died or not, by delaying, it destroyed all hope that Lazarus would rise again.

Anyway, when Martha heard that Jesus had come she went out to see him. And her words to Jesus are heart-wrenching.

“Lord, if you had been here, my brother wouldn’t have died. (John 11:21)

I’ve always wondered how Martha said that. Was she accusing him of being heartless? I’d always thought so. But if Lazarus had died the day they sent the messenger, she would have known he would have been too late anyway. Still, when we’re grieving, we’re not always so logical are we?

But look at Jesus’ response.

“Your brother will rise again,” (John 11:23)

Again, I wonder at Martha’s response. Did she at first surge with hope? “Jesus is going to raise my brother to life!” If she felt that way, her practical mind soon took over. “No, it’s too late. It’s been four days. Jesus must be talking about something else.” So she said to Jesus, “Yes, I know that he will be raised on the last day when God judges all people. (John 11:24, Daniel 12:2)

But Jesus said this in verse 25.

“I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me, even if he dies, will live. Everyone who lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” (John 11:25-26)

Talk about cryptic words, Martha’s head must have been spinning. Looking back as Christians, we know that Jesus is God’s Son and has the power of life and death. He proved that when he rose from the dead after his crucifixion. But Martha knew none of this. Still, look at her answer in verse 27.

“Yes, Lord,” she told him, “I believe you are the Messiah, the Son of God, who comes into the world.” (John 11:27)

Now those words may sound full of faith, and they were, but maybe not in the way we think. We say things like Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and we immediately think of Jesus’ deity. But that’s not what those words meant to Martha, at least not at that time. Both terms, “Messiah” and “Son of God” had the primary idea of “God’s anointed King.” So she wasn’t saying, “I believe you are God, with the power of life and death.” She was saying, “I believe that you are God’s anointed King.”

In other words, she was probably saying to Jesus, “I have no idea what you mean. But you are my King and I trust you.”

Can you say the same when Jesus tells you something you don’t understand. When his actions make no sense to you? “You are my King. And I trust you.” That’s what Jesus desires of us: The faith of a child.

Anyway, after saying this, Martha goes to find her sister Mary. And when Mary hears Jesus is there, she runs to him and says the same heart-wrenching words to Jesus that Martha did: “If only you had been here, my brother wouldn’t have died.” And when Jesus saw her weeping and all the people around her weeping with her, his heart broke and he started to weep too.

Sometimes we wonder if God really cares. If he actually notices our pain. But Jesus was God in human flesh. And he showed how he feels when we’re in pain. Some of the people with Mary saw Jesus’ tears and said, “How Jesus loved him.”

But some were cynical. They said, “Couldn’t he who opened the blind man’s eyes also have kept this man from dying?” (John 11:37)

In other words, “If Jesus really loved Lazarus, why did he let him die?”

Have you ever heard words like that before? Have you ever said words like that before? “God, if you really loved me, you wouldn’t have allowed that terrible thing to happen.”

Now sometimes, those are words simply born from pain. That doesn’t make it right, but I don’t think it’s something God condemns us for. But sometimes, we let our hearts become hardened and cynical. And those words express a sharp distrust for who God is and what he is like. And that’s a dangerous thing. It destroys faith and wrecks our relationship with God.

How do you see Jesus? Do you see him as good? Do you see him as loving? As powerful? As someone worthy of your love and allegiance. Or because of your hurt, are you seeing him cynically?

Anyway, deeply troubled, perhaps because of the people’s attitude, but also because of the sisters' pain, Jesus went to Lazarus’ tomb. When he got there, he said to Martha, “Remove the stone.” But look at her response.

“Lord, there is already a stench because he has been dead four days.” (John 11:39)

In short, “What’s the point, Jesus? He’s dead. He’s rotting. There’s no hope. Why move the stone now? I don’t understand.” Look at Jesus’ response.

“Didn’t I tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?” (John 11:40)

In other words, “Martha, you called me your King. Trust me. You may not understand, but trust me. And you will see God work in ways you can’t imagine.”

At that point, Martha had a choice. To insist on an explanation. To insist that things were hopeless. To insist there was no point to Jesus’ command. Or to trust her King and obey. What did she do? She trusted her King and obeyed. And Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead.

What do we get from all this?

How do you see Jesus? Do you call him your King? And if you do, what kind of King do you see him as? Capricious? Uncaring? Unfair? Incompetent? Impotent? Untrustworthy? Or as a King who is good, powerful, and who deeply loves you?

If you ever want to have a life that goes beyond all you could ask or imagine, where you can see God’s work in your life, even in the most painful times, that’s the ultimate question. Do you trust him?

Because the disciples chose to trust and follow Jesus to Bethany, they saw God work in an incredible way that they could never have imagined. Because Martha chose to trust Jesus and remove the stone, she saw her brother raised and her pain turned to joy.

What will you do? We read a verse a couple weeks ago, and it’s worth revisiting.

What no eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no human heart has conceived— God has prepared these things for those who love him. (1 Corinthians 2:9, CSB)

Do you believe that? I do. When I left Hawaii to come here, I never expected to see God bless me in all the ways he has. But if I had not trusted him, I would have never found out all the good he had in store for me.

That said, I still struggle to trust God at times. Especially when he is asking me to do something new. I like being comfortable. I like the good things I already have. But how often have I settled for the good I have now when I could have had God’s best that he had planned for me? I don’t know. I wonder if one day I’ll stand before him and hear him say, “Look at all these things I wanted for you. I wish you had trusted me and taken them. You had no idea just how good they were, did you?” I wonder how much regret I’ll have. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to live that way.

But there’s one other area of trust I want you to think about. Like Martha and Mary, you may be going through some painful times. And you don’t know why God is allowing it. Because of that you’re struggling with feelings of bitterness. You’re struggling with feelings of cynicism of how good God really is and how much he really loves you.

Jesus is asking you the same thing he asked Martha. “Will you trust me? I know things are hard. I know you’re going through deep pain. But will you trust me?”

Maybe someone close to you has died, and it feels much too soon. Maybe you’re struggling with hurt from your past. People have hurt you and you’re finding it hard to let go of the past and move on. Or you have health problems and no matter how much you pray, it’s not getting better.

I think of my cousin. She loved the Lord, but for years, she struggled off and on with depression. And then she found out she had cancer. She was terrified of chemotherapy, so instead of that, she prayed a lot that God would heal her. But he didn’t. And eventually, in a time of severe depression, she took her life.

Like Lazarus’ decaying body in the tomb, we sometimes have pain that lies rotting in our hearts. And Jesus says to us the same thing that he told Martha. “Remove the stone. Uncover your pain before me. Trust me. I can do far more than you can ask or imagine. But you have to trust me.”

That’s what my cousin struggled to do when Jesus didn’t heal her like she hoped. I’m not condemning her for her lack of faith. I don’t think Jesus did either. I think he still welcomed her into his kingdom despite what she did. But I do believe that he had more for her on this earth than she could have imagined if she had only trusted.

I’ve seen other friends maintain their joy, touching others with God’s love even when cancer eventually took them. I’ve seen my dad find peace and a whole new relationship with God and my mom in the midst of losing his eyesight. I’ve seen a famous Christian artist tragically lose his 5-year old daughter in a car accident. And yet, he has now touched millions of others who have suffered similar tragedies.

Why could they do that? I think the reason is they uncovered their pain before Jesus. They uncovered all their fears. And they said, “I trust you, my good King.”

Jesus can get you to the other side of your pain. Sometimes he’s asking you to do something you don’t want to do. It might mean getting chemotherapy though it scares you. It might mean choosing to forgive the person who so badly wounded you. But again, the most difficult thing he might ask, the thing that you might find most hard to accept, is to stop the “Whys” and say like Martha did, “I believe you are the Messiah, the Son of God. You are my King. And I choose to still believe you’re good. I choose to trust you. And I choose to follow you no matter what.”

That can be hard to do. But if you do, you will see the glory of God in your life.

Will you uncover your pain before Jesus and let go of the whys? Will you choose to trust your good King, and say, “No matter what, I will follow and obey you.” Only when you do will you find the truth of Paul’s words:

What no eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no human heart has conceived— God has prepared these things for those who love him. (1 Corinthians 2:9, CSB)