The Enemy of Wisdom

Proverbs 5:1–7 NASB95

1 My son, give attention to my wisdom, Incline your ear to my understanding; 2 That you may observe discretion And your lips may reserve knowledge. 3 For the lips of an adulteress drip honey And smoother than oil is her speech; 4 But in the end she is bitter as wormwood, Sharp as a two-edged sword. 5 Her feet go down to death, Her steps take hold of Sheol. 6 She does not ponder the path of life; Her ways are unstable, she does not know it. 7 Now then, my sons, listen to me And do not depart from the words of my mouth.

INTRO: How many of you have a food that you love, but eating that food makes you sick? Perhaps you love pizza, but you’re lactose intolerant. Or maybe you love the taste of donuts, but they cause your blood sugar to spike and you end up feeling awful.

Ok, so here’s the thing: Many folks, even knowing the consequences, still will elect to eat that food. Why? Because we have allowed our desire or lust for that flavor sensation to overrule our wisdom.

Now, here’s the thing: there is a similar battle we all face, but its consequences are far greater. What am I talking about? Sexual Lust. In fact, there have been a number of books that address this. One of the first books that I read as part of a men’s group long ago was, Every Man’s Battle. Yes, there is a correlating women’s version.

You see, even though the book of Proverbs is addressed from father to son, its words are applicable to us all- men and women, young and old. And the subject we address today is so important, that it spans the content of 3 chapters in our bible. But don’t miss this: Solomon, the wisest man to ever live, was himself not immune to the guiles of sexual lust.

That tells me something very important: One of wisdom’s greatest enemies is unchecked lust of the flesh.

Let me give you a few concerning stats:

Despite the link between marital dissatisfaction, trust, and quality of relationship, the NIH reports that approximately 90% of Americans engage in premarital sex

Despite the destructive results, the Institute for Family says that 1 in 4 people have engaged adultery.

Despite the negative consequences on their marriage, the violent and aggressive behavior linked to usage, and the moral trespass of pornography, about 91% of men and 60% of women have reported consuming pornography in the last month (NIH)

And listen, these stats are not radically different among professing Christians. It is so easy to think that we won’t face these struggles or to look around at church and assume we are the only ones facing them. But we’ve seen many men and women fall into the trappings of sexual lust, leaving in their wake ruined reputations, destroyed relationships, and the like.

Many great preachers and theologians have been known to speak of heaven as when they would finally be free from the corruption of their mind, including lust. I guess what I am saying is that sexual lust is a trojan horse: it looks desirable and even profitable to the eye, but it only delivers death and destruction.

This morning, our text shows us some practical wisdom in order to avoid the trappings of this enemy and also some help for those who are entangled already. I want you to know that I am not preaching to make you feel bad; I’m preaching to point us all to the proper fear of the Lord, where we can surrender our lives and our lusts to His lordship. So, grab your sermon guide and follow along with me as we find the wisdom to defeat the enemy of sexual lust.

The first rule of wisdom to defeat sexual lust is:

Do Not Look for Lust (5:8-14)

(READ)

ILL: There was a family who lived near a creek. And the little boy loved to play in the creek. This might normally be ok, but on this occasion, his mother instructed him not to play in the creek and if he did, he would get punished. That afternoon, the boy was going outside to play and he took with him a towel and some goggles. His mom stopped him and said, “Son, what are you doing with that towel and goggles? I told you not to play in the creek today.” and the boy replied, “Oh, I won’t mom. I’m just taking this stuff with me in case I get tempted to do it.”

You can guess how that played out. And we can find ourselves playing the same games with sexual lust. We like the endorphins that are produced in our brain and we tend to listen to the world that says “Do what feels good.”

And so, we might have ups and downs here- at one point we are determined or convicted in our sin, but let some time pass, and we find ourselves right back where we know we should not be. Maybe it’s clicking on that website that you know you’ll see tantalizing pictures. Maybe it’s going by the office of that one coworker to flirt, or believing the cultural lie that this leads to some sort of ‘freedom”. In our flesh, we tend to actually go looking for lust!

The problem is that we ask the wrong question of ourselves. We ask, “How far can I go without it being sin?” But the problem is that sin originates in our heart- our motives. It’s not about keeping some sort of line, it’s about allowing God to rule in every area of our life. So here’s a better question: “How can I best honor God with my eyes… my thoughts?”

Solomon says, “Do not go near the door of her house!” Don’t go looking for that temptation! This is self-sabotage! And when we do this, we give our strength away, essentially putting ourselves in voluntary bondage under the rule of sexual lust. When we go looking for lust, we will find it… and it costs dearly.

Do you know how many lives and careers are ruined because people decided to silence the voice of wisdom, the voice of their own understanding even, and run to the footsteps of temptation. Young people, I want you to especially listen to me: If you are viewing pornography or engaging in pornographic texts, streaming content, or even social media, you are allowing lust to rule your heart. This is a perversion of God’s good creation. And it leads to destruction. Friend, this will impact your future relationships and will rob you in ways you never thought possible.

And this is not just for young people. The power of lust does not die when we get older. ILL on dying man who confessed lust

So what? Do not look for lust! Put up guardrails. Get accountability. Maybe that’s a software like Covenant Eyes or maybe it’s a friend who will call you out when necessary. But here’s a hard truth, sexual lust will find us even when we aren’t looking for it. And so, we have to have another tactic. This can be found over in chapter 6.

Do Not Entertain Lust (6:25-29, 32)

(READ)

Have you ever thought or heard someone say, “It’s not hurting anyone. I’m just having a little fun, it does not mean anything.” OR “He/ she listens or gets me better than my spouse.”

ILL: I remember hearing of a revival preacher who used to brag about all the women who would flirt with him. He’d travel form town to town, and I guess he was handsome and the ladies saw him as sensitive and admired him. When confronted by a friend, he said that it made him feel valued, but that he would never cross the line. Now, we’ve already talked about the foolishness of this thinking, but guess what? He crossed the line.

Solomon warns: “Do not let her capture you with her eyelids” (25)

IOW, don’t entertain those lustful thoughts. Don’t lie awake daydreaming about the sexual desires you have with anyone unless that someone is your spouse. You see, much like not looking to be tempted, the danger of lust is that it overtakes our heart and mind.

Here, we see the rhetorical question in v. 27 (READ)

Entertaining lust is like taking a burning torch and hugging it. Your are going to get burned!

ILL: Have you ever driven on an old dirt road that has clear ruts from traffic? It’s almost impossible not to drive the same path. OK, Did you know that our thoughts create pathways or ditches in our mind, similar to that old road? So, as we entertain these lustful thoughts, they become more prominent and we cannot get ourselves out of the ruts.

So whether you are at church or at a family meal, your thoughts ride down the prominent pathway of lust. You can even be praying to God and your mind will go somewhere that is absolutely depraved and corrupt.

Practically, we need to see not only are you going to get burned; not only will you harm your life, but so also the lives of those you engage with. And listen, we quickly try to justify this kind of teaching as legalism, but friend it was Jesus who said in Matthew 5:28 "...everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

And Solomon says in v. 32, that one who commits adultery lacks sense! So, let me plead with you as the Apostle Paul did with the Corinthian church, “FLEE from sexual immorality!” Flee from lust, do not entertain it or go looking for it, for it brings death! Still, for some it’s too late to prevent sexual sin. You are already entrenched.

Do Not Linger in Lust (7:7-23)

In chapter 7, Solomon describes how easy it is to get entangled in the sin of sexual immorality. You see, the physical practice of sexual immorality begins in the mind and heart. When we have looked for or entertained lust, then we become susceptible to the seduction of engaging physically.

I know it’s a bit long, but let me read this to you. (READ)

The naive- those who have not surrendered to God, are easy prey to the enemy of sexual lust. And folks, this is such a deep hole that once you are in, it can feel that there is no way out.

I’ve heard so many stories of lives ruined because they were seduced by the promise of fulfillment through some sort of sexual action. Middle school kids who were seduced into sending pictures of themselves to the boy or girl they like, only to be blackmailed or shamed. Women have engaged in sexual excursions with coworkers thinking they would feel valued only to realize they were being used. Men have chased after a feeling of fulfillment and power, only to have their life crumble before their eyes.

So let me point us to some wisdom and help for those who are in the midst of this today. First, let me show you that God has given an answer for everything that you are seeking; fulfillment, value, fun, joy, connection, etc. It’s called marriage. And when we fear the Lord, we can enjoy His design.

Husbands, wives- direct your affection to your spouse. Look at 5:15-20 (READ)

And if your marriage is lacking, invest in it. Go to counseling. Be intentional with one another. Pursue one another; outdo one another in honor and love (Rom. 12:10). Look, you will get out of your marriage what you put into it. And for those of you who are still single, this wisdom is not just for your marriage, but about honoring God with your body and heart in every season of life. Look ahead to what God may provide in that season, and honor God and your future spouse today.

Second, if you are entrenched in sexual sin, then Solomon gives us an illustration to help. Look at 6:1-5 (READ)

Let me say it this way: You know you are in over your head. You know you have made a mistake. So, make it right. Humble yourself- ask forgiveness and get on the path of deliverance. That may mean temporary conflict, but you need to see that this will come out one day. Don’t linger here. And you know, it may cost you something. But you cannot make it right by hiding it.

Third, if you want to get on a better path, then look to the ant in 6:6-11 (READ)

This is not just about being a diligent worker. Solomon placed this right in the midst of this section on sexual lust because the only way to get on the upright path is to be intentional and diligent about it. Listen, nobody is going to make you do this. Just like there’s no chief ruler of the ants, you have free will. But if you want to be rich in the ways of love and marriage, you cannot be lazy!

Fourth and finally, if you hope for healing, then prioritize the fear of the Lord. Look at 6:12-19 (READ)

You see, it’s easy to convince ourselves that we can fix it another way. We can simply stop, but not seek forgiveness. Or we can cut back, or we can try to blame our sinfulness on someone else. But you see, sexual sin is merely a symptom of our sick and corrupted heart.

Therefore, we must get out of the driver’s seat, step down from our thrones, and give all of our lives over to God. We must acknowledge that we are not enough, that we need a new heart and a transformed life. And that only comes by surrendering ourselves to Christ as Savior and Lord. This wisdom is not given so we can save ourselves, but so we would run to the Savior who saves sinners.

The enemy is a roaring lion, prowling about and seeking to devour, but Christ is the Good Shepherd who laid down His life for his sheep. If you feel the weight of guilt or conviction this morning, then right where you are, call out to God for his healing. Asking for help is not failure, it’s wisdom.

Work in a better conclusion

[PRAY]

Discuss: In Proverbs 5–7, how does Solomon show that sexual sin is progressive (looking, entertaining, lingering)? Where do you see that pattern in real life?

Discuss: What are some practical “guardrails” that can help protect the heart and mind in today’s digital and relational culture?

Discuss: Why is the fear of the Lord essential for resisting sexual temptation, rather than relying on willpower alone?