Learning to Lament

INTRODUCTION

It’s challenging to live in two places at once. Julie and I did that for a few years, while I studied in Seminary. We lived in Kentucky most of the year. But during the semester breaks we came back to Alberta and worked on the farm.

When I started preaching here three years ago, I was still a pastor at Calvary Grace and had responsibilities there. But I was trying to live and be out here as much as possible.

Many of you feel the challenge of trying to be in more than one place at a time. To be involved at work, in church life, and at home.

Living in multiple places at once is hard. This is how much of our Christian life is experienced. We live knowing that life is hard and God is holy. We live and experience days of trouble and feel God has forgotten us. But we also live with God’s truth guiding us, reminding us that God is faithful and good. We live in the experience of a fallen world, but we also live knowing the truth that God is faithful, even in a fallen world. But it’s hard to live in both places at the same time.

The Psalms of Lament are given to us for this reason. They teach us how to live in a way that acknowledges the reality of pain and yet trusts in the power and mercy of God in our pain.

In his book, “Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy: Discovering the Grace of Lament”, author Mark Vroegop writes, “no one taught you how to cry. Tears are part of what it means to be human. But to lament is Christian. It is a prayer of faith for the journey between a hard life and God’s goodness. We need to learn to lament.”

Vroegop defines biblical lament as a “prayer of pain leading to trust in God”.

We need to learn to lament. And that I was this passage - and many others in the Psalms - teach us to do. So this morning we’re going to learn to lament, guided by Asaph’s own lament in his “day of trouble”. We’re not told specifically what was troubling him. The Psalms before and after maybe give us some clue. In Psalm 73, he looks at the prosperity of the wicked and wonders why God blesses them. In Psalm 74, Asaph recalls the destruction of the Temple. The exact phrase “my soul refuses to be comforted” is used in Genesis 37:35 when after Jacob was told (falsely) that his beloved son Joseph was devoured by a wild animal. Asaph’s trouble’s aren’t specified. But the state of his soul and how he processed the pain is given to us in this Psalm.

The reality is that all of us live in days of trouble. Since Genesis 3 and the entrance of sin into this world, the whole world - right down to the deepest level of our soul - groans because of troubles. My initial intention was to preach the next passage in Matthew 5. But as I thought about the troubles many of you are experiencing, and knowing that if you’re not experiecing much trouble now, you will experience trouble at some point, I was compelled to set before us a “lesson in lament”. There are different types and degrees of troubles.

The Stauffer’s experieced troubles that many will never experience, losing two children - a daughter murdered in cold blood; a son whose heart burst on the evening of his birthday. But everyone’s troubles mean something to them and does something to them. Some of you are experiecing the troubles of unfulfilled dreams. Maybe you have the trouble of chronic pain. Some experiece the troubles of workplace woes. Others of you are dealing with the trouble of children not walking with the Lord, or trouble in your marriage, or trouble with your money, or trouble with your soul.

We need to learn how to lament.

The Psalms are the song-book of God’s people. Jesus not only fulfilled the Psalms, but he prayed and sung them himself. Think of Jesus on the cross. In his agony, he self consciously prayed the Psalm of Lament in Psalm 22 - “my God, my God why have you forsaken me.”

Jesus Christ is fully acquainted with griefs and sorrows. Jesus prayed Psalms of lament. He asked the “why”? question in his prayers to his Father. The Psalms of lament were written not only for us, but for the Lord Jesus Christ to meditate on and leverage as he lived, suffered and died for us. In his hours of greatest agony, Jesus prayed these kinds of words to God.

The Psalm consists of 4 sections. You see that word “selah”. Those are often helpful indicators of a change in section.

THE LOUD CRIES OF THE TROUBLED SOUL (VS. 1-3)

REFLECTIONS ON THE PAST AND RAW QUESTIONS (VS. 4-9)

MOVING FROM ME TO YOU (VS. 10-15)

GOD’S INSCRUTIBLY WISE WAYS (VS. 16-20)

The activity of the first two section are connected and the activity of the second two sections are related. Asaph’s testimony teaches us how to lament. There’s two core elements of biblical lament:

TELL GOD OUR TROUBLES HONESTLY

DWELL ON GOD’S WONDERFUL WAYS IN OUR TROUBLES

TRUST GOD AS HE LEADS US THROUGH OUR TROUBLES

Tell, dwell, trust. Let’s see how Asaph models this for us.

First,

TELL GOD OUR TROUBLES HONESTLY

Psalm 77:1–3 “I cry aloud to God, aloud to God, and he will hear me. In the day of my trouble I seek the Lord; in the Night my hand is stretched out without wearying; my soul refuses to be comforted. When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints. Selah”

To pray in the midst of our pain is an act of faith. Asaph cries aloud to God, confident that God will hear him. There’s a theology about God that was clearly formed before the troubles came. He knew that God is not a distant, uncaring God. He knew and believed that God hears his people in times of need. He was taught this from an early age. Perhaps this is why in the next chapter he reminds the parents in Israel of their responsibility to “tell the coming generation the glorious deeds of the Lord”. What you teach about God and what kind of teaching you receive about God matters. Asaph told God his problems - with loud cries - with confidence that God would hear him.

He sought the Lord.

He stretched out his hand without wearying.

His physical expressions correlates to his desperation and depedence on God to hear and act. Loud cries and lifted hands - when was the last time you expressed yourself to God in that way? Learning to lament includes learning to put off the proud stoicism in our soul and to express - with our words and actions - that we need God. The author of Hebrews tells us in Hebrews 5:7 “In the days of his flesh, Jesus offered up prayers and supplications, with loud cries and tears, to him who was able to save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverence.” Think of Jesus in Gethsemane and on Golgotha. His prayers were the prayers of a desperate man, needing God’s help in times of trouble. Loud cries and lifted hands - this is the posture of reverence towards God and faith in God.

In your trouble, find a place where you can go and cry aloud to God and lift your hands. Those postures are reverent. But they also serve to reinforce in our minds: that our help comes from the Lord who hears his children’s cries in times of trouble. The reason God ordains troubles is because he wants to make a people who seek him with all their heart. The troubles you’re facing now or will face, are all designed by God to create in you a heart hungry to seek God.

Maybe you’ve been doing that. But your soul isn’t comforted. You’re still anxious or afraid or maybe angry with God or others because your circumstances haven’t changed. You’re in good company. Relief from our troubles is rarely instaneous. When Asaph meditates on God, he moans. Why? Perhaps he’s thinking: God, I know you are good. I know you are powerful. So why don’t you do anything to alleviate my troubles? I know you can, so why won’t you fix this problem?

Learning to lament looks like continuing to seek the Lord, even when the soul refuses to be comforted.

Don’t give up seeking the Lord. Resist the temptation to give God the silent treatment. Vroegrop writes, “Prayerful lament is better than silence. However, I’ve found that many people are afraid of lament. They find it too honest, too open, or too risky. But there’s something far worse: silent despair. Giving God the silent treatment is the ultimate manifestation of unbelief.”

Asaph continues to tell the Lord his troubles. In verse 4, we see Asaph’s theology again. He believes in the meticulous sovereignty of God. No aspect of his life is random: “you hold my eyelids open; I am so troubled that I cannot speak.” Sometimes the Lord gives sleep; other times he keeps it from us. Even as he cries to the Lord, he can’t speak - he’s having a hard time articulating himself. Can you resonate with this man? Sleepless. Unable to speak clearly. We have a word for this: overwhelmed. He’s overwhelmed. He’s unable to function and do normal things like sleep and speak.

I was speaking on a panel at the conference this weekend on the topic of biblical counseling. We are complex beings. The technical term is that we are a “phycho-somatic” unity. We are composed of body and soul; flesh and spirit; material and immaterial. The troubles in our soul can and do have an effect on our bodies and how we function. Our soul can be troubled because of our own sin, and God will not let us sleep because he wants us to repent. Our souls can be faint and troubled because of evil in the world, or the sins of others against us. And God keeps sleep from us because he wants us to seek him with desperation and find rest for our souls through trusting in Christ.

When we’re exhausted in our troubles, we often start recounting the past - wishing that we could go back to the good ole days when times were good. This is what Asaph did. He considered the days of old, the years long ago. He asked God: “Let me remember my song in the night; let me meditate in my heart.” He’s desperate for relief. He wants a restoration of joy and gladness he used to experience. But he’s not getting it.

So he moves from telling God about his troubles to telling God about his troubles with God himself. Look at verses 7-9. Asaph fires off a list of questions in rapid fire.

Will the Lord spurn forever?

Will he never again be favorable?

Has his steadfast lost forever ceased?

Are his promises at an end for all time?

Has God forgotten to be gracious?

Has he in anger shut up his compassion?

Remember, this is the content of Asaph’s cries. He’s telling God: right now I’m struggling to see how you are being good and faithful to your covenant promise. I don’t think Asaph really believes that God is unloving and that God has turned his back on him and the covenant people of God. He’s expressing what he feels to be true and the thoughts that are going through his mind about God. As he looks at his life, as he surveys the state of the people of God and their wickedness, as he looks at the Temple and how the wicked seem to be thriving more than the righteous - he’s thinking: God is really looks like you’ve turned your back on us. It really looks to me and feels like you’re giving up on being gracious to your people and just stiff-arming us.

Learning to lament is learning to be real and honest with God. To cry aloud with complaints and questions. Not in anger, of course. But with real, raw honesty. Honest questions are allowed from God’s children. To speak candidly with God about our troubles with him, is part of the process for how God sanctifies us in our troubles. There’s a time to be silent and still. But perpetual silence in times of trouble is not healthy.

Verse 10 summarizes this first half of the Psalm. If you look down at the footnote in your Bible, you’ll see that there’s some debate on how to translate this sentence. Some translations say, “This is my grief: that the right hand of the Most High has changed.” But I think the ESV translation is better. The main reason is that the Selah at the end of verse 9 marks an end that unit. And verse 10 begins a marked shift in Asaph’s lament.

Which is a second component of learning to lament. We must Tell God our Troubles Honestly.

DWELL ON GOD IN OUR TROUBLES RELENTLESSLY

Verse 10 Asaph says he will appeal to the year of the right hand of the most High. That language about the right hand of the Most High is langauge used in connection with God’s work in bringing Israel out of Egypt, which we see is what Asaph resolves to dwell on.

I want you to see how Asaph’s language of lament shifts. In verses 1-9, he uses the first person singular over and over. I, me and my. In verses 11 and 12 he continues to use that, but his language is beginning to change. He speaks about what he will do and then in verses 13-20 the third person singular - you and your - dominate. His focus shifts from his woes to God’s works.

I will remember the deeds of the LORD.

I will remember your wonders of old.

I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds.

Remember. Ponder. Meditate. As God keeps him awake at night, and his soul refuses to be comforted, he realizes that not only does he need to tell God his troubles. But he needs to dwell on God during his troubles.

Asaph is counseling himself. He’s giving directions to his soul in his time of trouble.Here’s what you need to do Asaph. You need to engage in the spiritual discipline of remembering, pondering and meditating on God’s works. Less time focusing on the golden years from your past, and focus on the glorious years of God’s right hand delivering his people in the past. Learning to lament moves from telling God our woes to dwelling on God’s works. God custom tailors our troubles so that we meditate on and marvel at his works and his ways.

Sometimes our troubles are so intense and our soul is so faint that can’t get ourselves out of the slough of despond. We get stuck in a cycle of dwelling on our problems and telling God to fix our problems. Praise God for the ministry of other believers. We all have a ministry of needing to remind ourselves - and to remind others - about the wonderful works and inscrutible ways of God.

In verses 7-9, he expressed questions about God’s character. But having meditated on the ways and works of God in the past, he now expresses trust in the Lord: “Your way, O God, is holy. What god is great like our God? You are the God who works wonders; you have made known your might among the peoples. You with your arm redeemed your people, the children of Jacob and Joseph. Selah”

Your way is holy. God’s ways are pure and righteous. Meditating on the truth has recalibrated his view of God to align with what is true about God.

You are the God who works wonders, makes known your might, and redeems your people. He recalls the powerful miracles God performe in Egypt. He recalls the way God protected Israel from judgment through the provision of a substituionary lamb whose shed blood caused judgment to passover the homes.

He remembers and meditates on how God led his people safely through the seemingly impossible obstacle of the Red Sea. Listen to how Asaph personifies the response of the waters: “When the waters saw you, O God, when the waters saw you, they were afraid; indeed, the deep trembled. The clouds poured out water; the skies gave forth thunder; your arrows flashed on every side. The crash of your thunder was in the whirlwind; your lightnings lighted up the world; the earth trembled and shook. Your way was through the sea, your path through the great waters; yet your footprints were unseen. You led your people like a flock by the hand of Moses and Aaron.”

Learning to lament means learning to direct our minds to dwell on what is true and good and beatiful about God and his ways in the past. Because he’s the same yesterday, today and forever, we trust that he will lead us just like he’s always done for his covenant people. God’s way is to lead his people through the sea, not around it. He could have brought Israel around the sea. But he chose to lead Israel through the sea, under the leadership of Moses and Aaron. God brings his people out of Egypt and safely into the promised land through a way that is “inscrutible” and “impossible” on their own. God designs the way he leads his people so that it’s clear: salvation, from beginning to end, is entirely his work based on his mercy. He leads us “through deep waters” so that we would trust him each step of the way.

Of course, God’s way of the sea is a foreshadowing of the greater way he would destroy our enemies and bring us into the promised land. The inscrubtible way of the sea gives way to the inscrutible way of the cross. An apparently foolish and impossible way to destroy death and deliver his people to life. Jesus Christ did not skirt the way of the cross, the way of shame, the route of death and divine damnation for his people. There is one way God redeems, and it’s the way of the cross. God leads us from death to life, and destroys the enemies of sin, death and the Satan - through the way of the cross.

Moses and Aaron led Israel through the sea. They walked by faith as much as the people did. And so did Jesus, the trailblazer who leads his flock - his people - from death to life. We have a Savior who learned to trust God in uttering louds cries of lament. Put another way: Jesus can sympathize with days of trouble and the daunting “way of the cross”.

He pled with his Father to remove the cup from him.

He lamented to his Father as he drank the cup of God’s wrath for his flock: my God my God why have you forsaken me? Here’s the reality: God did spurn his Son. But not forever.

His favor was turned away from the innocent Son.

God’s covenant curse was brought on Jesus.

Christian, we will face days of trouble. We must learn to lament. And learning to lament means dwelling on the fact that we have a Savior who is well-aquainted with grief and learned to lament as he went through the way God ordained for him: the way of the cross.

Why does this matter for us in our lament?

Because we need to know that our God sees us and sympathizes us in our days of trouble. he knows what it is to seek the Lord and still moan in agony.

Because we need to know that even though we may feel like God has forsaken us and no longer favour us and that his promises are null and void, we see that because the Son of God came through, he will never leave us or forsake us as we go through deep waters.

We have a savior who has lamented as he journeyed through the most treacherous path of suffering. He knows the journey of lament. He knows the joy of victory and life that comes on the other side of walking by faith in days of trouble.

In your days of trouble, learn to lament.

Tell God Your Woes

Dwell on God’s Works

Trust God’s Ways

CONCLUDING APPLICATIONS

Asaph schools us in the skill and strategy of lament.

We must tell God our woes. Be honest with him. Don’t be a stoic. Silence and stewing in anger and frustration isn’t wisdom. Speak to God with raw emotion, and keep at it.

But then we must consciously choose to dwell on the wonderful works of God. Think of it, believer: God’s sea of judgment will never come crashing down on you. Christ has come through and made it to the other side. We follow him in the way of the cross. The way of suffering. The way of shame. And eventually God will bring us to enjoy our reward - life with him in the promised land.