Obedience in Forgiveness

Scripture Reading | Philemon 8-25

Introduction

Situation - 2 Cor. 7:12

One had done wrong

One that suffered wrong

Receive, Willingly, Receive For Ever

Such a “beseeching” and such “obedience” must have its’ reasons

In the last portion of Philemon Paul writes supply some reasons for why Philemon ought to forgive and receive Onesimus.

Philemon owes a debt he could never pay

Philemon can continue to refresh the bowels of the saints - including Paul

Philemon can obey God

Philemon is accountable to spiritual authority

Philemon can maintain the bond of fellowship in Christ

Philemon can by the grace of Christ who forgave him

Sermon

Philemon 19 “I Paul have written it with mine own hand, I will repay it: albeit I do not say to thee how thou owest unto me even thine own self besides.”

Philemon owes a debt he could never pay

Onesimus owes Philemon material and temporal debt

Onesimus as a brother has sinned against Philemon

Philemon owes Paul a spiritual and eternal debt - Paul gave him the gospel (how could he ever pay it back)

When someone offends you and owes you something remember what you owe others who have blessed you spiritually

Remember they don’t demand repayment

You couldn’t pay it even if they required it

Remember to owe no man anything but to love one another (Rom. 13)

Philemon 20 “Yea, brother, let me have joy of thee in the Lord: refresh my bowels in the Lord.”

2. Philemon can continue to refresh the bowels of the saints - including Paul

Philemon 5 “hearing of thy love and faith, which thou hast toward the Lord Jesus, and toward all saints;”

Philemon 7 “For we have great joy and consolation in thy love, because the bowels of the saints are refreshed by thee, brother.”

“Profitable” - v11 - Philemon a blessing toward Paul, toward others

Contrary to the world - refresh the bowels

Php. 2:2 - fulfill joy

Refreshed others, now Paul - Paul loves both, desires them to be one, loves unity in the church

If there isn’t forgiveness

Sadden Paul’s heart

Will impact Philemon’s testimony

Will impact relationships, fellowship, in the church

Instead he can bring “joy”!

Philemon 21 “Having confidence in thy obedience I wrote unto thee, knowing that thou wilt also do more than I say.”

3. Philemon can obey God

God instructs and commands forgiveness - consistent with identity with Christ - core of the gospel

2 Corinthians 2:5–11 “But if any have caused grief, he hath not grieved me, but in part: that I may not overcharge you all. Sufficient to such a man is this punishment, which was inflicted of many. So that contrariwise ye ought rather to forgive him, and comfort him, lest perhaps such a one should be swallowed up with overmuch sorrow. Wherefore I beseech you that ye would confirm your love toward him. For to this end also did I write, that I might know the proof of you, whether ye be obedient in all things. To whom ye forgive any thing, I forgive also: for if I forgave any thing, to whom I forgave it, for your sakes forgave I it in the person of Christ; Lest Satan should get an advantage of us: for we are not ignorant of his devices.”

Paul is confident that Philemon’s obedience will be more

1 The. 3:11-13

Philemon’s potential abundance

1. Prodigal son celebration

2. Reception of same servant office, but more

Ministry capabilities - Philemon 11, 13

Philemon 22 “But withal prepare me also a lodging: for I trust that through your prayers I shall be given unto you.”

4. Philemon is accountable to spiritual authority

Philemon anticipate Paul’s personal follow up

Pauline Pattern

1 Corinthians 4:18–21 “Now some are puffed up, as though I would not come to you. But I will come to you shortly, if the Lord will, and will know, not the speech of them which are puffed up, but the power. For the kingdom of God is not in word, but in power. What will ye? shall I come unto you with a rod, or in love, and in the spirit of meekness?”

2 Corinthians 12:14 “Behold, the third time I am ready to come to you; and I will not be burdensome to you: for I seek not yours, but you: for the children ought not to lay up for the parents, but the parents for the children.”

2 Corinthians 13:1 “This is the third time I am coming to you. In the mouth of two or three witnesses shall every word be established.”

In Philemon it is a gentle reality check not a discipline measure

Pray for Paul

Start praying for Paul’s arrival - part of which is to check on Philemon’s obedience

How are Philemon’s prayers, specifically for Paul’s arrival, going to affect his forgiveness and actions toward Onesimus.

Do I want Paul out of prison?

Do I pray for his release?

If so - one of his stops will be here - gentle accountability to forgive him

Philemon 23–24 “There salute thee Epaphras, my fellowprisoner in Christ Jesus; Marcus, Aristarchus, Demas, Lucas, my fellowlabourers.”

5. Philemon can maintain the bond of fellowship in Christ

There are five men mentioned here - Epaphras, Marcus, Aristarchus, Demas, Lucas

All precious to Paul and Philemon

All men Philemon knows and who know Philemon

Fellowship - fellows in a ship

Fellowship of God’s dear Son - 1 Cor. 1

Communion - common union

Are not to do independently of the fellowship

Your acts as members of Christ body impact other members that when the proper nourishment of the body isn’t administer others have to bear

It can produce schism - the only remedy for the schism of sin within the body is righteousness and forgiveness

Knit and compacted together

Php. 2

Philemon 25 “The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit. Amen.”

6. Philemon can forgive by the grace of Christ who forgave him

Can’t do this own strength, own power, own will

Flesh wants vengeance

The law wants justice - to the letter

Yet, provided for in the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ

This needs to be in your spirit - renewing your mind

Ephesians 4:32 “And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”

Conclusion to Philemon

Did Philemon forgive Onesimus?

Philemon forgives Onesimus - why it is in the canon of scripture

Paul released from this imprisonment - instead of heading to Spain (Rom. 15:22-24) he visits some established churches - Colossae being one, the church in Philemon’s house

History tells us - some time after this, a man becomes a pastor of the church at Ephesus

His name - Onesimus - we speculate it is him, but if so - wow!

If so - Onesimus not only forgiven, but released from servanthood to Philemon to serve the Lord Jesus Christ.

A Pearl Harbor Story - see notes

Forgiveness Song & Story

It's the hardest thing to give away And the last thing on your mind today It always goes to those who don't deserve It's the opposite of how you feel When they pain they caused is just too real Takes everything you have to say the word Forgiveness, forgiveness It flies in the face of all your pride It moves away the mad inside It's always anger's own worst enemy Even when the jury and the judge Say you've got a right to hold a grudge It's the whisper in your ear saying set it free Forgiveness, forgiveness Forgiveness, forgiveness Show me how to love the unlovable Show me how to reach the unreachable Help me now to do the impossible Forgiveness, forgiveness Help me now to do the impossible Forgiveness It'll clear the bitterness away It can even set a prisoner free There is no end to what its power can do So let it go and be amazed by what you see through eyes of grace The prisoner that it really frees is you Forgiveness, forgiveness Forgiveness, forgiveness Show me how to love the unlovable Show me how to reach the unreachable Help me now to do the impossible Forgiveness I want finally set it free Show me how to see what your mercy sees Help me now to give what You gave to me Forgiveness, forgiveness Forgiveness, forgiveness Forgiveness, forgiveness

Conclusion

Paul gives Philemon six compelling reasons to forgive Onesimus: he owes an unpayable spiritual debt to Paul, forgiveness allows him to continue refreshing the hearts of believers, obedience to God opens doors to abundant blessings, spiritual accountability encourages righteousness, unity in Christ's body must be maintained, and God's grace empowers what our flesh cannot do alone. The fact that this personal letter is preserved in Scripture strongly suggests Philemon chose obedience and extended forgiveness. History tells us a man named Onesimus later became a pastor at Ephesus—possibly the same runaway slave, now transformed by grace. If so, forgiveness didn't just end a conflict; it launched the glory of God. A broken relationship was restored, a servant was freed to serve Christ, and a testimony of grace has influenced believers for generations.

Today, you stand where Philemon once stood. Someone has wronged you, and you have every legal right to demand justice. But you also possess something infinitely more powerful: the opportunity to extend the same grace that was extended to you. You cannot forgive in your own strength—your flesh craves revenge and the law demands payment—but the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ is with your spirit. The same grace that forgave your impossible debt is available to help you forgive. The same power that transformed you from enemy to child of God can flow through you to others. What might God do through your forgiveness? How might He transform the person who hurt you? What ministry might He release them into? The world holds grudges and chains people to their past mistakes, but you have the power to set people free, to reflect God's heart, and to show a watching world what the gospel really looks like in action.

Will you choose what Philemon chose? Will you let grace triumph over grievance? Will you trust God enough to release your right to justice, forsake revenge and take part in the love of Christ that passes knowledge and watch Him do something beautiful by His Word working in you? Forgive as you have been forgiven. Love as you have been loved. Release others as Christ has released you. The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit. Amen.