Stop Main-Charactering Your Own Life

BIG IDEA

Prayer is how you stop main-charactering your own life.

Prayer is dependence practiced out loud.

INTRODUCTION

Jesus is describing life in the kingdom. Not prayer technique. Not spiritual aesthetics. Relationship.

Culture says:

Trust yourself.

Be your own hero.

You are enough.

But even culture is cracking.

Influencers talk about burnout.

Athletes talk about pressure.

Artists talk about identity confusion.

Self sufficiency looks strong until it collapses.

Jesus says something different.

He says: Ask.

Prayer Will Never Be Important Until It Becomes Real

A. I learned to imitate praying far before learning to pray.

I knew when to bow my head.

I knew the phrases to use.

I did not know dependence.

B. Prayer felt optional because I still believed I was capable.

If I can fix it, I do not need to ask.

If I can plan it, I do not need to seek.

If I can control it, I do not need to knock.

C. Prayer only became real when I realized I was not enough.

Truth: You will not pray consistently until you feel deeply needy.

Prayer exposes whether you are trusting God or main-charactering your own life.

Transition: High school culture trains you to believe you are the hero of your own story.

You Are Being Formed to Depend on Yourself

A. Academically, it depends on your performance. B. Socially, it depends on your image. C. Spiritually, it can feel like it depends on your discipline.

The quiet message is: It depends on you.

Outside of salvation, some of you have never prayed a real prayer.

You have said words.

You have bowed your head.

But you have never come to God because you knew you needed Him.

Some of you do not pray because:

• You are distracted. • You are attached to your phone. • You expect instant results. • You love your sin more than intimacy with God.

You have to want to talk to God more than you want your sin.

Prayer is not available to the version of you that refuses to repent.

Transition: Now let’s walk the text carefully. Matthew 7:7-11

1. Ask because you need Him. (Matthew 7:7–8)

a. Ask means admit you lack. You do not ask for what you believe you already have.

b. Seek means pursue what you cannot produce alone. Seeking assumes you do not have the solution inside yourself.

c. Knock means you are outside and need access. Knocking admits you are not in control of the door.

The verbs are present tense.

Keep asking.

Keep seeking.

Keep knocking.

Verse 8 clarifies the promise:

“For everyone who asks receives…”

This is not a blank check. It is assurance that the Father is not reluctant.

Most people do not stop praying because God said no. They stop praying because waiting feels boring.

Jesus says keep coming.

2. Trust because He is good. (Matthew 7:9–10)

“Which one of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone?”

a. Bread and stone. In that region, small stones resembled loaves. Jesus uses absurd contrast. No loving father deceives a hungry child.

b. Fish and serpent. Fish was basic dinner. A serpent symbolized danger. No loving father substitutes harm for help.

c. The argument is from lesser to greater. “If you then, being evil…” Even flawed parents still give good gifts. How much more does a perfect Father?

If you doubt God’s goodness, prayer will feel unstable.

Everything hinges on “how much more.”

3. Rest because He knows best. (Matthew 7:11)

“How much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him?”

a. “Being evil” means morally broken, not worst imaginable. Even loving parents are flawed. God is not.

b. “How much more” builds confidence in divine character. If broken love still gives good gifts, perfect love gives better ones.

c. “Good things” must be defined by Scripture, not desire. Luke 11:13 — He gives the Holy Spirit. Romans 8:32 — If He gave His Son, He will not withhold what is truly good.

Good sometimes means yes.

Good sometimes means wait.

Good sometimes means no.

The cross proves the Father’s heart.

If He gave His Son when you were His enemy, He is not ignoring you now that you are His child.

What Do You Do With This?

1. Decide whether you want God more than control.

If you cling to:

• Secret sexual sin • Gossip • Comparison • Pride • Hidden rebellion

Prayer will feel foreign.

You cannot pursue communion while protecting darkness.

Repentance makes prayer possible.

2. Practice persistent dependence this week.

A. Set a ten minute daily time. No phone. No multitasking.

B. Choose one request and pray it every day for seven days. Keep asking. Keep seeking. Keep knocking.

C. Fast one meal this week. When hunger hits, pray. Let physical hunger remind you of spiritual need.

D. Practice right now.

Take time tight now. Ask God for one thing you genuinely need.

If you are honest.. you have a need in your life that is greater than a car.

3. When God says no, stay.

Do not ghost God because you did not get your way.

Persistent prayer forms trust even when circumstances do not change.

What Would Change If We Lived This Way?

Anxiety would shrink because control shifts to the Father.

Performance Christianity would give way to dependence.

We would pray before we panic.

We would seek before we scroll.

We would knock before we quit.

Prayer is how you stop main-charactering your own life.

Closing Question:

Are you depending on the Father, or are you still trying to be the hero?